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SCENE III. The Florentine camp.
Enter the two French Lords and some two or three Soldiers First Lord You have not given him his mother's letter? Second Lord I have delivered it an hour since: there is something in't that stings his nature; for on the reading it he changed almost into another man. First Lord He has much worthy blame laid upon him for shaking off so good a wife and so sweet a lady. Second Lord Especially he hath incurred the everlasting displeasure of the king, who had even tuned his bounty to sing happiness to him. I will tell you a thing, but you shall let it dwell darkly with you. First Lord When you have spoken it, 'tis dead, and I am the grave of it. Second Lord He hath perverted a young gentlewoman here in Florence, of a most chaste renown; and this night he fleshes his will in the spoil of her honour: he hath given her his monumental ring, and thinks himself made in the unchaste composition. First Lord Now, God delay our rebellion! as we are ourselves, what things are we! Second Lord Merely our own traitors. And as in the common course of all treasons, we still see them reveal themselves, till they attain to their abhorred ends, so he that in this action contrives against his own nobility, in his proper stream o'erflows himself. First Lord Is it not meant damnable in us, to be trumpeters of our unlawful intents? We shall not then have his company to-night? Second Lord Not till after midnight; for he is dieted to his hour. First Lord That approaches apace; I would gladly have him see his company anatomized, that he might take a measure of his own judgments, wherein so curiously he had set this counterfeit. Second Lord We will not meddle with him till he come; for his presence must be the whip of the other. First Lord In the mean time, what hear you of these wars? Second Lord I hear there is an overture of peace. First Lord Nay, I assure you, a peace concluded. Second Lord What will Count Rousillon do then? will he travel higher, or return again into France? First Lord I perceive, by this demand, you are not altogether of his council. Second Lord Let it be forbid, sir; so should I be a great deal of his act. First Lord Sir, his wife some two months since fled from his house: her pretence is a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques le Grand; which holy undertaking with most austere sanctimony she accomplished; and, there residing the tenderness of her nature became as a prey to her grief; in fine, made a groan of her last breath, and now she sings in heaven. Second Lord How is this justified? First Lord The stronger part of it by her own letters, which makes her story true, even to the point of her death: her death itself, which could not be her office to say is come, was faithfully confirmed by the rector of the place. Second Lord Hath the count all this intelligence? First Lord Ay, and the particular confirmations, point from point, so to the full arming of the verity. Second Lord I am heartily sorry that he'll be glad of this. First Lord How mightily sometimes we make us comforts of our losses! Second Lord And how mightily some other times we drown our gain in tears! The great dignity that his valour hath here acquired for him shall at home be encountered with a shame as ample. First Lord The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and ill together: our virtues would be proud, if our faults whipped them not; and our crimes would despair, if they were not cherished by our virtues. Enter a Messenger
How now! where's your master? Servant He met the duke in the street, sir, of whom he hath taken a solemn leave: his lordship will next morning for France. The duke hath offered him letters of commendations to the king. Second Lord They shall be no more than needful there, if they were more than they can commend. First Lord They cannot be too sweet for the king's tartness. Here's his lordship now. Enter BERTRAM
How now, my lord! is't not after midnight? BERTRAM I have to-night dispatched sixteen businesses, a month's length a-piece, by an abstract of success: I have congied with the duke, done my adieu with his nearest; buried a wife, mourned for her; writ to my lady mother I am returning; entertained my convoy; and between these main parcels of dispatch effected many nicer needs; the last was the greatest, but that I have not ended yet. Second Lord If the business be of any difficulty, and this morning your departure hence, it requires haste of your lordship. BERTRAM I mean, the business is not ended, as fearing to hear of it hereafter. But shall we have this dialogue between the fool and the soldier? Come, bring forth this counterfeit module, he has deceived me, like a double-meaning prophesier. Second Lord Bring him forth: has sat i' the stocks all night, poor gallant knave. BERTRAM No matter: his heels have deserved it, in usurping his spurs so long. How does he carry himself? Second Lord I have told your lordship already, the stocks carry him. But to answer you as you would be understood; he weeps like a wench that had shed her milk: he hath confessed himself to Morgan, whom he supposes to be a friar, from the time of his remembrance to this very instant disaster of his setting i' the stocks: and what think you he hath confessed? BERTRAM Nothing of me, has a'? Second Lord His confession is taken, and it shall be read to his face: if your lordship be in't, as I believe you are, you must have the patience to hear it. Enter PAROLLES guarded, and First Soldier
BERTRAM A plague upon him! muffled! he can say nothing of me: hush, hush! First Lord Hoodman comes! Portotartarosa First Soldier He calls for the tortures: what will you say without 'em? PAROLLES I will confess what I know without constraint: if ye pinch me like a pasty, I can say no more. First Soldier Bosko chimurcho. First Lord Boblibindo chicurmurco. First Soldier You are a merciful general. Our general bids you answer to what I shall ask you out of a note. PAROLLES And truly, as I hope to live. First Soldier [Reads] 'First demand of him how many horse the duke is strong.' What say you to that? PAROLLES Five or six thousand; but very weak and unserviceable: the troops are all scattered, and the commanders very poor rogues, upon my reputation and credit and as I hope to live. First Soldier Shall I set down your answer so? PAROLLES Do: I'll take the sacrament on't, how and which way you will. BERTRAM All's one to him. What a past-saving slave is this! First Lord You're deceived, my lord: this is Monsieur Parolles, the gallant militarist,--that was his own phrase,--that had the whole theoric of war in the knot of his scarf, and the practise in the chape of his dagger. Second Lord I will never trust a man again for keeping his sword clean. nor believe he can have every thing in him by wearing his apparel neatly. First Soldier Well, that's set down. PAROLLES Five or six thousand horse, I said,-- I will say true,--or thereabouts, set down, for I'll speak truth. First Lord He's very near the truth in this. BERTRAM But I con him no thanks for't, in the nature he delivers it. PAROLLES Poor rogues, I pray you, say. First Soldier Well, that's set down. PAROLLES I humbly thank you, sir: a truth's a truth, the rogues are marvellous poor. First Soldier [Reads] 'Demand of him, of what strength they are a-foot.' What say you to that? PAROLLES By my troth, sir, if I were to live this present hour, I will tell true. Let me see: Spurio, a hundred and fifty; Sebastian, so many; Corambus, so many; Jaques, so many; Guiltian, Cosmo, Lodowick, and Gratii, two hundred and fifty each; mine own company, Chitopher, Vaumond, Bentii, two hundred and fifty each: so that the muster-file, rotten and sound, upon my life, amounts not to fifteen thousand poll; half of the which dare not shake snow from off their cassocks, lest they shake themselves to pieces. BERTRAM What shall be done to him? First Lord Nothing, but let him have thanks. Demand of him my condition, and what credit I have with the duke. First Soldier Well, that's set down. Reads
'You shall demand of him, whether one Captain Dumain be i' the camp, a Frenchman; what his reputation is with the duke; what his valour, honesty, and expertness in wars; or whether he thinks it were not possible, with well-weighing sums of gold, to corrupt him to revolt.' What say you to this? what do you know of it? PAROLLES I beseech you, let me answer to the particular of the inter'gatories: demand them singly. First Soldier Do you know this Captain Dumain? PAROLLES I know him: a' was a botcher's 'prentice in Paris, from whence he was whipped for getting the shrieve's fool with child,--a dumb innocent, that could not say him nay. BERTRAM Nay, by your leave, hold your hands; though I know his brains are forfeit to the next tile that falls. First Soldier Well, is this captain in the duke of Florence's camp? PAROLLES Upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy. First Lord Nay look not so upon me; we shall hear of your lordship anon. First Soldier What is his reputation with the duke? PAROLLES The duke knows him for no other but a poor officer of mine; and writ to me this other day to turn him out o' the band: I think I have his letter in my pocket. First Soldier Marry, we'll search. PAROLLES In good sadness, I do not know; either it is there, or it is upon a file with the duke's other letters in my tent. First Soldier Here 'tis; here's a paper: shall I read it to you? PAROLLES I do not know if it be it or no. BERTRAM Our interpreter does it well. First Lord Excellently. First Soldier [Reads] 'Dian, the count's a fool, and full of gold,'-- PAROLLES That is not the duke's letter, sir; that is an advertisement to a proper maid in Florence, one Diana, to take heed of the allurement of one Count Rousillon, a foolish idle boy, but for all that very ruttish: I pray you, sir, put it up again. First Soldier Nay, I'll read it first, by your favour. PAROLLES My meaning in't, I protest, was very honest in the behalf of the maid; for I knew the young count to be a dangerous and lascivious boy, who is a whale to virginity and devours up all the fry it finds. BERTRAM Damnable both-sides rogue! First Soldier [Reads] 'When he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it; After he scores, he never pays the score: Half won is match well made; match, and well make it; He ne'er pays after-debts, take it before; And say a soldier, Dian, told thee this, Men are to mell with, boys are not to kiss: For count of this, the count's a fool, I know it, Who pays before, but not when he does owe it. Thine, as he vowed to thee in thine ear, PAROLLES.' BERTRAM He shall be whipped through the army with this rhyme in's forehead. Second Lord This is your devoted friend, sir, the manifold linguist and the armipotent soldier. BERTRAM I could endure any thing before but a cat, and now he's a cat to me. First Soldier I perceive, sir, by the general's looks, we shall be fain to hang you. PAROLLES My life, sir, in any case: not that I am afraid to die; but that, my offences being many, I would repent out the remainder of nature: let me live, sir, in a dungeon, i' the stocks, or any where, so I may live. First Soldier We'll see what may be done, so you confess freely; therefore, once more to this Captain Dumain: you have answered to his reputation with the duke and to his valour: what is his honesty? PAROLLES He will steal, sir, an egg out of a cloister: for rapes and ravishments he parallels Nessus: he professes not keeping of oaths; in breaking 'em he is stronger than Hercules: he will lie, sir, with such volubility, that you would think truth were a fool: drunkenness is his best virtue, for he will be swine-drunk; and in his sleep he does little harm, save to his bed-clothes about him; but they know his conditions and lay him in straw. I have but little more to say, sir, of his honesty: he has every thing that an honest man should not have; what an honest man should have, he has nothing. First Lord I begin to love him for this. BERTRAM For this description of thine honesty? A pox upon him for me, he's more and more a cat. First Soldier What say you to his expertness in war? PAROLLES Faith, sir, he has led the drum before the English tragedians; to belie him, I will not, and more of his soldiership I know not; except, in that country he had the honour to be the officer at a place there called Mile-end, to instruct for the doubling of files: I would do the man what honour I can, but of this I am not certain. First Lord He hath out-villained villany so far, that the rarity redeems him. BERTRAM A pox on him, he's a cat still. First Soldier His qualities being at this poor price, I need not to ask you if gold will corrupt him to revolt. PAROLLES Sir, for a quart d'ecu he will sell the fee-simple of his salvation, the inheritance of it; and cut the entail from all remainders, and a perpetual succession for it perpetually. First Soldier What's his brother, the other Captain Dumain? Second Lord Why does be ask him of me? First Soldier What's he? PAROLLES E'en a crow o' the same nest; not altogether so great as the first in goodness, but greater a great deal in evil: he excels his brother for a coward, yet his brother is reputed one of the best that is: in a retreat he outruns any lackey; marry, in coming on he has the cramp. First Soldier If your life be saved, will you undertake to betray the Florentine? PAROLLES Ay, and the captain of his horse, Count Rousillon. First Soldier I'll whisper with the general, and know his pleasure. PAROLLES [Aside] I'll no more drumming; a plague of all drums! Only to seem to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition of that lascivious young boy the count, have I run into this danger. Yet who would have suspected an ambush where I was taken? First Soldier There is no remedy, sir, but you must die: the general says, you that have so traitorously discovered the secrets of your army and made such pestiferous reports of men very nobly held, can serve the world for no honest use; therefore you must die. Come, headsman, off with his head. PAROLLES O Lord, sir, let me live, or let me see my death! First Lord That shall you, and take your leave of all your friends. Unblinding him
So, look about you: know you any here? BERTRAM Good morrow, noble captain. Second Lord God bless you, Captain Parolles. First Lord God save you, noble captain. Second Lord Captain, what greeting will you to my Lord Lafeu? I am for France. First Lord Good captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet you writ to Diana in behalf of the Count Rousillon? an I were not a very coward, I'ld compel it of you: but fare you well. Exeunt BERTRAM and Lords
First Soldier You are undone, captain, all but your scarf; that has a knot on't yet PAROLLES Who cannot be crushed with a plot? First Soldier If you could find out a country where but women were that had received so much shame, you might begin an impudent nation. Fare ye well, sir; I am for France too: we shall speak of you there. Exit with Soldiers
PAROLLES Yet am I thankful: if my heart were great, 'Twould burst at this. Captain I'll be no more; But I will eat and drink, and sleep as soft As captain shall: simply the thing I am Shall make me live. Who knows himself a braggart, Let him fear this, for it will come to pass that every braggart shall be found an ass. Rust, sword? cool, blushes! and, Parolles, live Safest in shame! being fool'd, by foolery thrive! There's place and means for every man alive. I'll after them. Exit 第三场 弗罗棱萨军营
二臣及兵士二三人上。
臣甲 你还没有把他母亲的信交给他吗?
臣乙 我已经在一点钟前给了他; 信里好像有些什么话激发了他的天良,因为 他读了信以后,就好像变了一个人似的。
臣甲 他抛弃了这样一位温柔贤淑的妻子,真不应该。
臣乙 他更不应该拂逆王上的旨意,王上不是为了他的幸福作出格外的恩赐吗? 我可以告诉你一件事情,可是你不能讲给别人听。
臣甲 你告诉了我以后,我就把它埋葬在自己的心里,决不再向别人说起。
臣乙 他已经在这里弗罗棱萨勾搭上了一个良家少女, 她的贞洁本来是很出名 的;今夜他就要逞他的淫欲去破坏她的贞操,他已经把他那颗宝贵的指环送给她了, 还认为自己这桩见不得人的勾当十分上算。
臣甲 上帝饶恕我们!我们这些人类真不是东西!
臣乙 人不过是他自己的叛徒, 正像一切叛逆的行为一样,在达到罪恶的目的 之前,总要泄漏出自己的本性。他干这种事实际会损害他自己高贵的身分,但是他 虽然自食其果,却不以为意。
臣甲 我们对自己龌龊的打算竟然这样吹嘘, 真是罪该万死。那么今夜他不能 来了吗?
臣乙 他的时间表已经排好,一定要在半夜之后方才回来。
臣甲 那么再等一会儿他也该来了。 我很希望他能够亲眼看见他那个同伴的本 来面目,让他明白明白他自己的判断有没有错误,他是很看重这个骗子的。
臣乙 我们还是等他来了再处置那个人吧,这样才好叫他无所遁形。
臣甲 现在还是谈谈战事吧,你近来听到什么消息没有?
臣乙 我听说两方面已经在进行和议了。
臣甲 不,我可以确实告诉你,和议已经成立了。
臣乙 那么罗西昂伯爵还有些什么事好做呢? 他是再到别处去旅行呢,还是打 算回法国去?
臣甲 你这样问我,大概他还没有把你当作一个心腹朋友看待。
臣乙 但愿如此,否则他干的事我也要脱不了干系了。
臣甲 告诉你吧, 他的妻子在两个月以前已经从他家里出走,说是要去参礼圣 约克·勒。格朗;把参礼按照最严格的仪式执行完毕以后,她就在那地方住下,因 为她的多愁善感的天性经不起悲哀的袭击,所以一病不起,终于叹了最后一口气, 现在是在天上唱歌了。
臣乙 这消息也许不确吧?
臣甲 她在临死以前的一切经过, 都有她亲笔的信可以证明;至于她的死讯, 当然她自己无法通知,但是那也已经由当地的牧师完全证实了。
臣乙 这消息伯爵也完全知道了吗?
臣甲 是的,他已经知道了详详细细的一切。
臣乙 他听见这消息,一定很高兴,想起来真是可叹。
臣甲 我们有时往往会把我们的损失当作莫大的幸事!
臣乙 有时我们却因为幸运而哀伤流泪! 他在这里凭着他的勇敢,虽然获得了 极大的光荣,可是他回家以后将遭遇的耻辱,也一定是同样大的。
臣甲 人生就像是一匹用善恶的丝线交错织成的布; 我们的善行必须受我们的 过失的鞭挞,才不会过分趾高气扬;我们的罪恶又赖我们的善行把它们掩盖,才不 会完全绝望。
一仆人上。
臣甲 啊,你的主人呢?
仆人 他在路上遇见公爵, 已经向他辞了行,明天早晨他就要回法国去了。公 爵已经给他写好了推荐信,向王上竭力称道他的才干。
臣乙 为他说几句即使是溢美的好话,倒也是不可少的。
臣甲 怎样好听恐怕也不能平复国王的怒气。他来了。
勃特拉姆上。
臣甲 啊,爵爷!已经过了午夜了吗?
勃特拉姆 我今晚已经干好了十六件每一件需要一个月时间才办得了的事情。 且听我一一道来:我已经向公爵辞行,跟他身边最亲近的人告别,安葬了一个妻子, 为她办好了丧事,写信通知我的母亲我就要回家了,并且雇好了护送我回去的卫队; 除了这些重要的事情以外,还干好了许多小事情;只有一件最重要的事情还不曾办 妥。
臣乙 要是这件事情有点棘手, 您又一早就要动身,那么现在您该把它赶快办 好才是。
勃特拉姆 我想把它不了了之, 以后也希望不再听见人家提起它了。现在我们 还是来演一出傻子和大兵的对话吧。来,把那个冒牌货抓出来;他像一个妖言惑众 的江湖术士一样欺骗了我。
臣乙 把他抓出来。(兵士下)他已经锁在脚梏里坐了一整夜了,可怜的勇士!
勃特拉姆 这也是活该, 他平常脚跟上戴着马刺也太大模大样了。他被捕以后 是怎样一副神气?
臣甲 我已经告诉您了, 爵爷,要没有脚梏,他连坐都坐不直。说得明白些: 他哭得像一个倒翻了牛奶罐的小姑娘。他把摩根当作了一个牧师,把他从有生以来 直到锁在脚梏里为止的一生经历源源本本向他忏悔;您想他忏悔些什么?
勃特拉姆 他没有提起我的事情吧?
臣乙 他的供状已经笔录下来, 等会儿可以当着他的面公开宣读;要是他曾经 提起您的事情——我想您是被他提起过的——请您耐着性子听下去。
兵士押帕洛上。
勃特拉姆 该死的东西! 还把脸都遮起来了呢!他不会说我什么的。我且不要 作声,听他怎么说。
臣甲 蒙脸人来了!浦托·达达洛萨。
兵士甲 他说要对你用刑,你看怎样?
帕洛 你们不必逼我, 我会把我所知道的一切招供出来;要是你们把我榨成了 肉酱,我也还是说这么几句话。
兵士甲 波斯哥·契末却。
臣甲 波勃利平陀·契克末哥。
兵士甲 真是一位仁慈的将军。 这里有一张开列着问题的单子,将爷叫我照着 它问你,你须要老实回答。
帕洛 我希望活命,一定不会说谎。
兵士甲“第一,问他公爵有多少马匹。”你怎么回答?
帕洛 五六千匹, 不过全是老弱无用的,队伍分散各处,军官都像叫化子,我 可以用我的名誉和生命向你们担保。
兵士甲 那么我就把你的回答照这样记下来了。
帕洛 好的,你要我发无论什么誓都可以。
勃特拉姆 他可以什么都不顾,真是个没有救药的狗才!
臣甲 您弄错了, 爵爷;这位是赫赫有名的军事专家帕洛先生,这是他自己亲 口说的,在他的领结里藏着全部战略,在他的刀鞘里安放着浑身武艺。
臣乙 我从此再不相信一个把他的剑擦得雪亮的人; 我也再不相信一个穿束得 整整齐齐的人会有什么真才实学。
兵士甲 好,你的话已经记下来了。
帕洛 我刚才说的是五六千匹马, 或者大约这个数目,我说的是真话,记下来 吧,我说的是真话。
臣甲 他说的这个数目,倒有八九分真。
勃特拉姆 像他这样的说真话,我是不感激他的。
帕洛 请您记好了,我说那些军官们都像叫化子。
兵士甲 好,那也记下了。
帕洛 谢谢您啦。真话就是真话,这些家伙都是寒伧得不成样子的。
兵士甲“问他步兵有多少人数。”你怎么回答?
帕洛 你们要是放我活命,我一定不说谎话。让我看:史卑里奥,一百五十人; 西巴斯辛,一百五十人;柯兰勃斯,一百五十人;杰奎斯,一百五十人;吉尔辛、 考斯莫、洛多威克、葛拉提,各二百五十人;我自己所带的一队,还有契托弗、伏 蒙特、本提,各二百五十人:一共算起来,好的歹的并在一起,还不到一万五千人, 其中的半数连他们自己外套上的雪都不敢拂掉,因为他们唯恐身子摇了一摇,就会 像朽木一样倒塌下来。
勃特拉姆 这个人应当把他怎样处治才好?
臣甲 我看不必,我们应该谢谢他。问他我这个人怎样,公爵对我信任不信任。
兵士甲 好, 我已经把你的话记下来了。“问他公爵营里有没有一个法国人名 叫杜曼上尉的;公爵对他的信用如何;他的勇气如何,为人是否正直,军事方面的 才能怎样;假如用重金贿赂他,能不能诱他背叛。”你怎么回答?你所知道的怎样?
帕洛 请您一条一条问我,让我逐一回答。
兵士甲 你认识这个杜曼上尉吗?
帕洛 我认识他, 他本来是巴黎一家缝衣铺里的徒弟,因为把市长家里的一个 不知人事的傻丫头弄大了肚皮,被他的师傅一顿好打赶了出来。(臣甲举手欲打。)
勃特拉姆 且慢,不要打他;他的脑袋免不了要给一爿瓦掉下来砸碎的。
兵士甲 好,这个上尉在不在弗罗棱萨公爵的营里?
帕洛 他在公爵营里,他的名誉一塌糊涂。
臣甲 不要这样瞧着我,我的好爵爷,他就会说起您的。
兵士甲 公爵对他的信用怎样?
帕洛 公爵只知道他是我手下的一个下级军官,前天还写信给我叫我把他开革; 我想他的信还在我的口袋里呢。
兵士甲 好,我们来搜。
帕洛 不瞒您说, 我记得可不大清楚,也许它在我口袋里,也许我已经把它跟 公爵给我的其余的信一起放在营里归档了。
兵士甲 找到了;这儿是一张纸,我要不要向你读一遍?
帕洛 我不知道那是不是公爵的信。
勃特拉姆 我们的翻译装得真像。
臣甲 的确像极了。
兵士甲“狄安娜,伯爵是个有钱的傻大少——”
帕洛 那不是公爵的信, 那是我写给弗罗棱萨城里一位名叫狄安娜的良家少女 的信,我劝她不要受人家的引诱,因为有一个罗西昂伯爵看上了她,他是一个爱胡 调的傻哥儿,一天到晚转女人的念头。请您还是把这封信放好了吧。
兵士甲 不,对不起,我要把它先读一遍。
帕洛 我写这封信的用意是非常诚恳的, 完全是为那个姑娘的前途着想;因为 我知道这个少年伯爵是个危险的淫棍,他是色中饿鬼,出名的破坏处女贞操的魔王。
勃特拉姆 该死的反复小人!
兵士甲
他要是向你盟山誓海,
你就向他把金银索讨;
你须要半推半就,若即若离,
莫让他把温柔的滋味尝饱。
一朝肥肉咽下了他嘴里,
你就永远不要想他付钞。
一个军人这样对你忠告:
宁可和有年纪人来往,
不要跟少年郎们胡调。
你的忠朴帕洛上。
勃特拉姆 我要把这首诗贴在他的额角上, 拖着他游行全营,一路上用鞭子抽 他。
臣甲 爵爷, 这就是您的忠心的朋友,那位精通万国语言的专家,全能百晓的 军人。
勃特拉姆 我以前最讨厌的是猫,现在他在我眼中就是一头猫。
兵士甲 朋友,照我们将军的面色看来,我们就要把你吊死了。
帕洛 将爷, 无论如何,请您放我活命吧。我并不是怕死,可是因为我自知罪 孽深重,让我终其天年,也可以忏悔忏悔我的余生。将爷,把我关在地牢里,锁在 脚梏里,或者丢在无论什么地方都好,千万饶我一命!
兵士甲 要是你能够老老实实招认一切, 也许还有通融余地。现在还是继续问 你那个杜曼上尉的事情吧。你已经回答过公爵对他的信用和他的勇气,现在要问你 他这人为人是否正直?
帕洛 他会在和尚庙里偷鸡蛋; 讲到强奸妇女,没有人比得上他;毁誓破约, 是他的拿手本领;他撒起谎来,可以颠倒黑白,混淆是非;酗酒是他最大的美德, 因为他一喝酒便会烂醉如猪,倒在床上,不会再去闯祸,唯一倒霉的只有他的被褥, 可是人家知道他的脾气,总是把他抬到稻草上去睡。关于他的正直,我没有什么话 好说;凡是一个正人君子所不应该有的品质,他无一不备;凡是一个正人君子所应 该有的品质,他一无所有。
臣甲 他说得这样天花乱坠,我倒有点喜欢他起来了。
勃特拉姆 因为他把你形容得这样巧妙吗?该死的东西!他越来越像一头猫了。
兵士甲 你说他在军事上的才能怎样?
帕洛 我不愿说他的谎话, 他曾经在英国戏班子里擂过鼓,此外我就不知道他 的军事上的经验了;他大概还在英国某一个迈兰德广场上教过民兵两人一排地站队。 我希望尽量说他的好话,可是这最后一件事我不能十分肯定。
臣甲 他的无耻厚脸,简直是空前绝后,这样一个宝货倒也是不可多得的。
勃特拉姆 该死!他真是一头猫。
兵士甲 他既然是这样一个卑鄙下流的人, 那么我也不必问你贿赂能不能引诱 他反叛了。
帕洛 给他几毛钱,他就可以把他的灵魂连同世袭继承权全部出卖,永不反悔。
兵士甲 他还有一个兄弟,那另外一个杜曼上尉呢?
臣乙 他为什么要问起我?
兵士甲 他是怎样一个人?
帕洛 也是一个窠里的老鸦; 从好的方面讲,他还不如他的兄长,从坏的方面 讲,可比他的哥哥胜过百倍啦。他的哥哥是出名的天字第一号的懦夫,可是在他面 前还要甘拜下风。退后起来,他比谁都奔得快;前进起来,他就寸步难移了。
兵士甲 要是放你活命,你愿不愿意作内应,把弗罗棱萨公爵出卖给我们?
帕洛 愿意愿意,连同他们的骑兵队长就是那个罗西昂伯爵。
兵士甲 我去对将军说,看他意思怎样。
帕洛(旁白)我从此再不打什么倒霉鼓了!我原想冒充一下好汉,骗骗那个淫 荡的伯爵哥儿,结果闯下这样大的祸;可是谁又想得到在我去的那个地方会有埋伏 呢?
兵士甲 朋友, 没有办法,你还是不免一死。将军说,你这样不要脸地泄漏了 自己军中的秘密,还把知名当世的贵人这样信口诋毁,留你在这世上,没有什么用 处,所以必须把你执行死刑。来,刽子手,把他的头砍下来。
帕洛 嗳哟, 我的天爷爷,饶了我吧,倘然一定要我死,那么也让我亲眼看个 明白。
兵士甲 那倒可以允许你, 让你向你的朋友们辞行吧。(解除帕洛脸上所缚之 布)你瞧一下,有没有你认识的人在这里?
勃特拉姆 早安,好队长!
臣乙 上帝祝福您,帕洛队长!
臣甲 上帝保佑您,好队长!
臣乙 队长,我要到法国去了,您要我带什么信去给拉佛大人吗?
臣甲 好队长,您肯不肯把您替罗西昂伯爵写给狄安娜小姐的情诗抄一份给我? 可惜我是个天字第一号的懦夫,否则我一定会强迫您默写出来;现在我不敢勉强您, 只好失陪了。(勃特拉姆及甲乙二臣下。)
兵士甲 队长,您这回可出了丑啦!
帕洛 明熗好躲,暗箭难防,任是英雄好汉,也逃不过诡计阴谋。
兵士甲 要是您能够发现一处除了荡妇淫娃之外没有其他的人居住的国土, 您 倒很可以在那里南面称王,建立起一个无耻的国家来。再见,队长;我也要到法国 去,我们会在那里说起您的。(下。)
帕洛 管他哩, 我还是我行我素。倘然我是个有几分心肝的人,今天一定会无 地自容;可是虽然我从此掉了官,我还是照旧吃吃喝喝,照样睡得烂熟,像我这样 的人,到处为家,什么地方不可以混混过去。可是我要警告那些喜欢吹牛的朋友们, 不要太吹过了头,有一天你会发现自己是一头驴子的。我的剑呀,你从此锈起来吧! 帕洛呀,不要害臊。厚着脸皮活下去吧!人家作弄你,你也可以靠让人家作弄走运, 天生世人,谁都不会没有办法的。他们都已经走了,待我追上前去。(下。)
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