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　　德莱塞在《美国悲剧》中描写了主人公克莱德·格里菲思受到社会上邪恶影响，逐渐蜕变、堕落为凶杀犯、最后自我毁灭的全过程。小说共分三卷。第一卷描写克莱德这个天真幼稚的青年人怎样受到外部世界腐蚀与毒害，逐渐演变成为一个玩世不恭、怙恶不悛的人，一直到汽车碾死女孩，逃离堪萨斯城为止，这是小说故事的准备阶段；第二卷描写克莱德与富商伯父萨缪尔·格里菲思邂逅后，以穷亲戚的关系来到莱柯格斯厂内充当工头助手，随后陷入与穷女工罗伯达、阔小姐桑德拉的三角恋情。为了高攀桑德拉，克莱德甘愿违悖自幼接受的基本道德准则，牺牲罗伯达，于是，他就通过翻船阴谋干掉了这个被他诱奸而怀孕的年轻的女工。事后，克莱德却落荒出逃，逍遥法外；第三卷主要描写案发之后，克莱德如何被捕入狱，受审和定罪，其间还穿插着美国两党和司法机构利用克莱德一案大搞政治投机的丑闻。最后经过终审判决，克莱德被送上了电椅。小说结尾处，还描写牧师出场，为临终之前克莱德寻求灵魂拯救的故事。小说内容并不新颖，但在一个象德莱塞那样具有同情心和悲剧感的作家手中却成为杰作了。

Raised by poor and devoutly religious parents, who force him to participate in their street missionary work, the ambitious but immature Clyde is anxious to achieve better things. His troubles begin when he takes a job as a bellboy at a local hotel. The boys he meets are much more sophisticated than he, and they introduce Clyde to the world of alcohol and prostitution. Clyde enjoys his new lifestyle and does everything in his power to win the affections of the flirtatious Hortense Briggs. But Clyde's life is forever changed when a stolen car in which he's traveling kills a young child. Clyde flees Kansas City, and after a brief stay in Chicago, he reestablishes himself as a foreman at the collar factory of his wealthy long-lost uncle in Lycurgus, New York, who meets Clyde through a stroke of fortune. The uncle does his best to help Clyde and advances him to a position of relative importance within the factory.Although Clyde vows not to consort with women in the way that caused his Kansas City downfall, he is swiftly attracted to Roberta Alden, a poor and very innocent farm girl working under him at the factory. Clyde initially enjoys the secretive relationship (forbidden by factory rules) and virtually coerces Roberta into sex, but his ambition forces him to realize that he could never marry her. He dreams of the elegant Sondra Finchley, the daughter of a wealthy Lycurgus man and a family friend of his uncle's. As developments between him and Sondra begin to look promising, Roberta discovers that she is pregnant.Having unsuccessfully attempted to procure an abortion for Roberta, who expects him to marry her, Clyde procrastinates while his relationship with Sondra continues to mature. When he realizes that he has a genuine chance to marry Sondra, and after Roberta threatens to reveal their relationship unless he marries her, Clyde hatches a plan to murder Roberta in a fashion that will seem accidental.Clyde takes Roberta for a canoe ride on Big Bittern Lake in upstate New York and rows to a remote area. As he speaks to her regarding the end of their relationship, Roberta moves towards him, and he strikes her in the face with his camera, stunning her and capsizing the boat. Unable to swim, Roberta drowns while Clyde, who is unwilling to save her, swims to shore. The narrative is deliberately unclear as to whether he acted with malice and intent to murder, or if he struck her merely instinctively. However, the trail of circumstantial evidence points to murder, and the local authorities are only too eager to convict Clyde, to the point of manufacturing additional evidence against him. Following a sensational trial before an unsympathetic audience, and despite a vigorous defense mounted by two lawyers hired by his uncle, Clyde is convicted, sentenced to death, and executed. The jailhouse scenes and the correspondence between Clyde and his mother stand out as exemplars of pathos in modern literature.
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Part 1 Chapter 1       Dusk--of a summer night. 　　And the tall walls of the commercial heart of an American city of perhaps 400,000 inhabitants--such walls as intime may linger as a mere fable. 　　And up the broad street, now comparatively hushed, a little band of six,--a man of about fifty, short, stout, withbushy hair protruding from under a round black felt hat, a most unimportant- looking person, who carried a small portable organ such as is customarily used by street preachers and singers. And with him a woman perhaps fiveyears his junior, taller, not so broad, but solid of frame and vigorous, very plain in face and dress, and yet nothomely, leading with one hand a small boy of seven and in the other carrying a Bible and several hymn books. 　　With these three, but walking independently behind, was a girl of fifteen, a boy of twelve and another girl ofnine, all following obediently, but not too enthusiastically, in the wake of the others. 　　It was hot, yet with a sweet languor about it all. 　　Crossing at right angles the great thoroughfare on which they walked, was a second canyon-like way, threadedby throngs and vehicles and various lines of cars which clanged their bells and made such progress as they mightamid swiftly moving streams of traffic. Yet the little group seemed unconscious of anything save a set purpose tomake its way between the contending lines of traffic and pedestrians which flowed by them. 　　Having reached an intersection this side of the second principal thoroughfare--really just an alley between twotall structures--now quite bare of life of any kind, the man put down the organ, which the woman immediatelyopened, setting up a music rack upon which she placed a wide flat hymn book. Then handing the Bible to theman, she fell back in line with him, while the twelve-year-old boy put down a small camp-stool in front of theorgan. The man--the father, as he chanced to be--looked about him with seeming wide-eyed assurance, andannounced, without appearing to care whether he had any auditors or not: 　　"We will first sing a hymn of praise, so that any who may wish to acknowledge the Lord may join us. Will youoblige, Hester?"At this the eldest girl, who until now had attempted to appear as unconscious and unaffected as possible,bestowed her rather slim and as yet undeveloped figure upon the camp chair and turned the leaves of the hymnbook, pumping the organ while her mother observed: 　　"I should think it might be nice to sing twenty-seven tonight--'How Sweet the Balm of Jesus' Love.'"By this time various homeward-bound individuals of diverse grades and walks of life, noticing the small groupdisposing itself in this fashion, hesitated for a moment to eye them askance or paused to ascertain the character oftheir work. This hesitancy, construed by the man apparently to constitute attention, however mobile, was seizedupon by him and he began addressing them as though they were specifically here to hear him. 　　"Let us all sing twenty-seven, then--'How Sweet the Balm of Jesus' Love.'"At this the young girl began to interpret the melody upon the organ, emitting a thin though correct strain, at thesame time joining her rather high soprano with that of her mother, together with the rather dubious baritone ofthe father. The other children piped weakly along, the boy and girl having taken hymn books from the small pilestacked upon the organ. As they sang, this nondescript and indifferent street audience gazed, held by thepeculiarity of such an unimportant-looking family publicly raising its collective voice against the vast skepticismand apathy of life. Some were interested or moved sympathetically by the rather tame and inadequate figure ofthe girl at the organ, others by the impractical and materially inefficient texture of the father, whose weak blueeyes and rather flabby but poorly-clothed figure bespoke more of failure than anything else. Of the group the mother alone stood out as having that force and determination which, however blind or erroneous, makes forself-preservation, if not success in life. She, more than any of the others, stood up with an ignorant, yet somehowrespectable air of conviction. If you had watched her, her hymn book dropped to her side, her glance directedstraight before her into space, you would have said: "Well, here is one who, whatever her defects, probably doeswhat she believes as nearly as possible." A kind of hard, fighting faith in the wisdom and mercy of that definiteoverruling and watchful power which she proclaimed, was written in her every feature and gesture. 　　"The love of Jesus saves me whole, The love of God my steps control,"she sang resonantly, if slightly nasally, between the towering walls of the adjacent buildings. 　　The boy moved restlessly from one foot to the other, keeping his eyes down, and for the most part only halfsinging. A tall and as yet slight figure, surmounted by an interesting head and face--white skin, dark hair--heseemed more keenly observant and decidedly more sensitive than most of the others--appeared indeed to resentand even to suffer from the position in which he found himself. Plainly pagan rather than religious, life interestedhim, although as yet he was not fully aware of this. All that could be truly said of him now was that there was nodefinite appeal in all this for him. He was too young, his mind much too responsive to phases of beauty andpleasure which had little, if anything, to do with the remote and cloudy romance which swayed the minds of hismother and father. 　　Indeed the home life of which this boy found himself a part and the various contacts, material and psychic, whichthus far had been his, did not tend to convince him of the reality and force of all that his mother and fatherseemed so certainly to believe and say. Rather, they seemed more or less troubled in their lives, at leastmaterially. His father was always reading the Bible and speaking in meeting at different places, especially in the"mission," which he and his mother conducted not so far from this corner. At the same time, as he understood it,they collected money from various interested or charitably inclined business men here and there who appeared tobelieve in such philanthropic work. Yet the family was always "hard up," never very well clothed, and deprivedof many comforts and pleasures which seemed common enough to others. And his father and mother wereconstantly proclaiming the love and mercy and care of God for him and for all. Plainly there was somethingwrong somewhere. He could not get it all straight, but still he could not help respecting his mother, a womanwhose force and earnestness, as well as her sweetness, appealed to him. Despite much mission work and familycares, she managed to be fairly cheerful, or at least sustaining, often declaring most emphatically "God willprovide" or "God will show the way," especially in times of too great stress about food or clothes. Yetapparently, in spite of this, as he and all the other children could see, God did not show any very clear way, eventhough there was always an extreme necessity for His favorable intervention in their affairs. 　　To-night, walking up the great street with his sisters and brother, he wished that they need not do this any more,or at least that he need not be a part of it. Other boys did not do such things, and besides, somehow it seemedshabby and even degrading. On more than one occasion, before he had been taken on the street in this fashion,other boys had called to him and made fun of his father, because he was always publicly emphasizing hisreligious beliefs or convictions. Thus in one neighborhood in which they had lived, when he was but a child ofseven, his father, having always preluded every conversation with "Praise the Lord," he heard boys call "Herecomes old Praise-the-Lord Griffiths." Or they would call out after him "Hey, you're the fellow whose sister playsthe organ. Is there anything else she can play?""What does he always want to go around saying, 'Praise the Lord' for? Other people don't do it."It was that old mass yearning for a likeness in all things that troubled them, and him. Neither his father nor hismother was like other people, because they were always making so much of religion, and now at last they weremaking a business of it. 　　On this night in this great street with its cars and crowds and tall buildings, he felt ashamed, dragged out ofnormal life, to be made a show and jest of. The handsome automobiles that sped by, the loitering pedestriansmoving off to what interests and comforts he could only surmise; the gay pairs of young people, laughing andjesting and the "kids" staring, all troubled him with a sense of something different, better, more beautiful thanhis, or rather their life. 　　And now units of this vagrom and unstable street throng, which was forever shifting and changing about them,seemed to sense the psychologic error of all this in so far as these children were concerned, for they would nudgeone another, the more sophisticated and indifferent lifting an eyebrow and smiling contemptuously, the moresympathetic or experienced commenting on the useless presence of these children. 　　"I see these people around here nearly every night now--two or three times a week, anyhow," this from a youngclerk who had just met his girl and was escorting her toward a restaurant. "They're just working some religiousdodge or other, I guess.""That oldest boy don't wanta be here. He feels outa place, I can see that. It ain't right to make a kid like that comeout unless he wants to. He can't understand all this stuff, anyhow." This from an idler and loafer of about forty,one of those odd hangers-on about the commercial heart of a city, addressing a pausing and seemingly amiablestranger. 　　"Yeh, I guess that's so," the other assented, taking in the peculiar cast of the boy's head and face. In view of theuneasy and self-conscious expression upon the face whenever it was lifted, one might have intelligentlysuggested that it was a little unkind as well as idle to thus publicly force upon a temperament as yet unfitted toabsorb their import, religious and psychic services best suited to reflective temperaments of maturer years. 　　Yet so it was. 　　As for the remainder of the family, both the youngest girl and boy were too small to really understand much ofwhat it was all about or to care. The eldest girl at the organ appeared not so much to mind, as to enjoy theattention and comment her presence and singing evoked, for more than once, not only strangers, but her motherand father, had assured her that she had an appealing and compelling voice, which was only partially true. It wasnot a good voice. They did not really understand music. Physically, she was of a pale, emasculate andunimportant structure, with no real mental force or depth, and was easily made to feel that this was an excellentfield in which to distinguish herself and attract a little attention. As for the parents, they were determined uponspiritualizing the world as much as possible, and, once the hymn was concluded, the father launched into one ofthose hackneyed descriptions of the delights of a release, via self-realization of the mercy of God and the love ofChrist and the will of God toward sinners, from the burdensome cares of an evil conscience. 　　"All men are sinners in the light of the Lord," he declared. "Unless they repent, unless they accept Christ, Hislove and forgiveness of them, they can never know the happiness of being spiritually whole and clean. Oh, myfriends! If you could but know the peace and content that comes with the knowledge, the inward understanding,that Christ lived and died for you and that He walks with you every day and hour, by light and by dark, at dawnand at dusk, to keep and strengthen you for the tasks and cares of the world that are ever before you. Oh, thesnares and pitfalls that beset us all! And then the soothing realization that Christ is ever with us, to counsel, toaid, to hearten, to bind up our wounds and make us whole! Oh, the peace, the satisfaction, the comfort, the gloryof that!""Amen!" asseverated his wife, and the daughter, Hester, or Esta, as she was called by the family, moved by theneed of as much public support as possible for all of them--echoed it after her. 　　Clyde, the eldest boy, and the two younger children merely gazed at the ground, or occasionally at their father,with a feeling that possibly it was all true and important, yet somehow not as significant or inviting as some ofthe other things which life held. They heard so much of this, and to their young and eager minds life was madefor something more than street and mission hall protestations of this sort. 　　Finally, after a second hymn and an address by Mrs. Griffiths, during which she took occasion to refer to themission work jointly conducted by them in a near-by street, and their services to the cause of Christ in general, athird hymn was indulged in, and then some tracts describing the mission rescue work being distributed, suchvoluntary gifts as were forthcoming were taken up by Asa--the father. The small organ was closed, the campchair folded up and given to Clyde, the Bible and hymn books picked up by Mrs. Griffiths, and with the organsupported by a leather strap passed over the shoulder of Griffiths, senior, the missionward march was taken up. 　　During all this time Clyde was saying to himself that he did not wish to do this any more, that he and his parentslooked foolish and less than normal--"cheap" was the word he would have used if he could have brought himselfto express his full measure of resentment at being compelled to participate in this way--and that he would not doit any more if he could help. What good did it do them to have him along? His life should not be like this. Otherboys did not have to do as he did. He meditated now more determinedly than ever a rebellion by which he wouldrid himself of the need of going out in this way. Let his elder sister go if she chose; she liked it. His youngersister and brother might be too young to care. But he-"They seemed a little more attentive than usual to-night, I thought," commented Griffiths to his wife as theywalked along, the seductive quality of the summer evening air softening him into a more generous interpretationof the customary indifferent spirit of the passer-by. 　　"Yes; twenty-seven took tracts to-night as against eighteen on Thursday.""The love of Christ must eventually prevail," comforted the father, as much to hearten himself as his wife. "Thepleasures and cares of the world hold a very great many, but when sorrow overtakes them, then some of theseseeds will take root.""I am sure of it. That is the thought which always keeps me up. Sorrow and the weight of sin eventually bring some of them to see the error of their way."They now entered into the narrow side street from which they had emerged and walking as many as a dozendoors from the corner, entered the door of a yellow single-story wooden building, the large window and the twoglass panes in the central door of which had been painted a gray-white. Across both windows and the smallerpanels in the double door had been painted: "The Door of Hope. Bethel Independent Mission. Meetings EveryWednesday and Saturday night, 8 to 10. Sundays at 11, 3 and 8. Everybody Welcome." Under this legend oneach window were printed the words: "God is Love," and below this again, in smaller type: "How Long SinceYou Wrote to Mother?"The small company entered the yellow unprepossessing door and disappeared.        暝色四合的一个夏日夜晚。 十万居民的美国城市的商业中心区，崇楼高墙，森然耸起……象这样的崇楼高墙，说不定到将来仅仅足资谈助罢了。 这时相当冷清的大街上，正有一小拨六个人。一个是五十上下。身材矮胖的男子，浓密的头发从他那顶圆形黑呢帽底下旁逸出来。此人长得其貌不扬，随身带着一台沿街传教与卖唱的人常用的手提小风琴。跟他在一起，有一个女人，约莫比他小五岁，个子比他高，体形不如他粗壮，但身子骨结实，精力挺充沛。她的脸容和服饰都很平常，可也不算太丑。她一手搀了一个七岁的男孩，一手拿着一本《圣经》和好几本赞美诗。跟这三人在一起，但各自走在后边的，是一个十五岁的女孩。一个十二岁的男孩和另一个九岁的女孩……他们个个很听话，但是一点儿都不带劲，只不过尾随着罢了。 天气很热，但是弥散着一丝儿恬适的倦意。 他们正走在跟另一条峡谷似的街道相交成直角的那条大街上，那儿行人如织，车辆似梭，还有各路电车丁丁当当地响着铃，在摩肩接踵的行人和车辆的急流中向前驰去。不过，这小拨人对此仿佛毫不在意，一心只想从身边擦过的那些争先恐后的车辆和行人中间挨挤过去。 他们走到了同下一条大街交叉的路口……其实只是两排高大建筑物中间的一条过道……这时已是然无人了。那个男人一放下风琴，女人马上把它打开，支起乐谱架，摆上了一本薄薄的大开本赞美诗。随后，她们那本《圣经》递给那个男人，往后一挪，同他站成一排。十二岁的男孩就把一只小小的轻便折凳放在风琴跟前。那个男人……正是孩子他们的父亲……睁大眼睛，似乎满有信心地往四下里扫了一眼，也不管有没有听众，就开腔说: "我们先唱一首赞美诗。凡是愿意颂扬上帝的，就不妨跟我们一块唱。赫思德，劳驾你来弹琴，好吗? "年龄最大的女孩，身材相当苗条，但是尚未完全发育，她一直尽量装出漠不关心。泰然自若的样子来。不过一听到这话，她就坐到了轻便折凳上，一面在翻赞美诗，一面弹起琴来。这时她母亲说: "我看今晚最好就唱第二十七首: ……《耶稣之爱抚何等甘美》。"这时，各种不同身分。不同职业。正往家走的行人，发现这小拨人这么仓卒登场了，有的只是迟疑地乜了他们一眼，有的……干脆驻足观看他们究竟在耍什么把戏。那个男人一看这种犹豫不定的态度，显然以为这下子已把行人们的注意力吸引住了(尽管还有点儿举棋不定)，于是就抓紧机会，对他们开讲了，好象他们是特地上这儿来听讲的。 "得了，我们大家就一块唱第二十七首: ……《耶稣之爱抚何等甘美》。"那个小姑娘一听这话，就在风琴上开始弹这个乐曲，奏出了一个虽然准确。 但很微弱的曲调;同时，跟着她相当激越的女高音一块唱的，还有她母亲的女高音和她父亲相当可疑的男中音。其他几个孩子，则从风琴上一小叠书里拿来赞美诗，有气无力地跟着一块哼唱。他们唱诗的时候，在街头那些难以形容。冷眼围看的人们，两眼凝望着……如此微不足道的一家人，竟然当众同声高唱，抗议人世间无处不有的怀疑与冷漠……这样的怪事把他们都给怔住了。有人对弹琴的小姑娘相当柔弱。尚欠丰满的身段发生兴趣或同情;也有人对父亲那副迂拙的寒酸相感兴趣或为之动怜，他那双没精打采的蓝眼睛和那肌肤相当松弛。 衣着又很差劲的体形，足以说明他早已落泊潦倒了。这一拨人里头，只有母亲身上显露出那么一种魄力和决心，哪怕是盲目或错误的，使她一生交不上好运道，好歹也能保住自己。她同另外几位相比，更多地流露出这么一种信仰坚定的神态，虽然无知，但不知怎的总是令人敬佩。你要是细心观察她，看到她把自己那本赞美诗搁在身边，两眼凝视前方的神态，一定会说: "是的，她就是这样的人，不管她有什么样缺点，也许会尽量按照她的信仰去做的。"她的一颦一笑。 一举一动都说明: 她对那个明确无误地主宰一切。观照一切的天神是赞不绝口的，她对天神的智慧和仁慈也是坚信不移的。 "耶稣的爱拯救我的整个身心，上帝的爱指引我的脚步前进，"她就在两旁巍然耸立的崇楼高墙中间，略带鼻音，响亮地歌唱着。 那个男孩子闲不住地两脚替换站着，两眼俯视着，充其量只是半心半意地在哼唱。他是瘦高个儿，头和脸长得真逗人……白净的肌肤，乌尾的头发……同其他几位相比，他好象特别善于观察，肯定更加敏感……显而易见，他对自己目前处境的确感到恼火，乃至于痛苦。他最感兴趣的，显然是世俗生活，而不是宗教生活，虽然他还没有充分意识到这一点。反正最能正确地说明他此时此刻的心态，不外乎是: 眼下要他干的这一套，肯定是不合他的心意。他太年轻了，他的心灵对于形形色色的美和享乐确实太敏感了，不过这些东西……也许跟主宰他父母心灵的那个遥远。朦胧的幻想境界，甚至还是格格不入。 说实话，这个男孩子的家里生活境况，以及他迄至今日在物质上和心灵上的种种遭际，都不能使他相信: 他父母似乎如此坚信和传播的那一套教义，真的是那么实在，那么有力量。相反，他们的生活……至少是物质生活，好象多少让人发愁。父亲总是到各处……特别是到离这儿不太远。和母亲合办的"传道馆"去……向会众诵经。布道。据他所知，他们还向各种各样对传道感兴趣，或是乐善好施的商人敛钱……看来这些商人对这一类慈善事业居然还很相信。尽管这样，这一家人日子过得老是"紧巴巴"，好衣服从来没有穿过，许多在别人看来似乎平常得很的安乐享受，他们都还没沾过边。可是父母亲还不时在颂扬上帝对他们，乃至于芸芸众生的慈爱和关怀。显然在哪儿出了些毛病吧。这一切眼下他还闹不清楚，可他对母亲还是不由得肃然起敬: 要知道母亲的那种毅力和热忱，以及她的温柔，对他都富有吸引力。尽管传道工作很忙，家累又很重，她总是尽量显出乐乐呵呵的样子来，或者至少说她还能撑得住，尤其在衣食极端紧缺的时候，她照例用极为坚定有力的语调说: "上帝会赐予我们的，"或者说，"上帝会给我们指引出路的。"不过，他和其他孩子们都看得很清楚，尽管他们家里一向亟需上帝垂爱恩赐，上帝却始终没给他们指引出一条看得清清楚楚的出路来。 今晚，他跟自己的姐妹和弟弟一块走在这条大街上，心里巴不得他们从此再也不用干这玩意儿，或者说至少是他自己最好能不参与。这一类事，人家的孩子压根儿就不干。再说，干这类事，不知怎的好象很寒伧，甚至于低人一等。 在他被迫走上街头以前，人家的孩子早已不止一次地大声招呼过他，而且还讥笑过他父亲，就是因为他父亲老是在稠人广众之中宣扬他的宗教信仰，或者说是他那坚定不移的宗教信念。那时候他还只有七岁，就因为他父亲每次跟人说话，一开口总要"赞美上帝"，他便听到附近街坊小孩们乱嚷嚷: "赞美上帝的老家伙格里菲思来了。"有时候，孩子们还在他背后大声喊道: "喂，你这个小不点儿，弹风琴的就是你姐姐吧。她还会弹别的玩意儿? ""他干吗要到处说什么' ''''赞美上帝，? 人家压根儿就不说呀。"正是多年来恨不得一切都跟人家一模一样的心态，既捉弄了他的那些孩子们，同时也使他感到苦恼。不管他的父亲也好，还是他的母亲也好，跟人家就是不一样，因为他们俩整日价宗教不离口，到如今终于把宗教当做生意经了。 这一天晚上，在那车辆如梭。人群杂。高楼耸立的大街上，他觉得真害羞，自己竟从正常的生活氛围里给拖出来，被人嘲弄，丢了丑。那时，一辆辆漂亮的小轿车打从他身边疾驰而去;游手好闲的行人，都在各自寻找(对他来说只好胡乱揣度的)那些乐事去了;成双配对的快活的青年男女，说说笑笑，吵吵闹闹;还有那些"小伢儿"瞪着眼直瞅他……这一切都使他很苦恼，他觉得: 倘若跟他的生活，或者说得更确切些，跟他们一家人的生活相比，人家的生活就是有点儿不一样，反正要好得多，美得多。 这时候，大街上游荡不定的人群，在他们周围不断变换，看来也意识到，让这些孩子参予其事，从心理学观点来说，实属大错特错了: 因为人群中间有一些人相互用胳膊肘轻推，以示不屑一顾;有一些世故较深。态度冷漠的人，扬起眉毛，只是轻蔑地一笑;还有一些人较有同情心，或则阅历较多，却认为犯不着让这些小孩子也登场。 "他们这拨人，几乎每天晚上，我在这儿总能看到，反正一星期得有两三回吧，"说这话的是一个年轻的店员。他和女友刚见了面，正陪着她上餐厅去。"我估摸，这拨人不外乎以宗教为名，搞什么骗人勾当吧。""那个最大的男小子，可不乐意待在这儿。他觉得怪别扭的，这我一眼就看出了。要是这小子自己不乐意，硬要他出来，那就实在没道理。不管怎么说，这一套玩意儿，反正他是一窍不通。"这些话，是一个年龄四十上下。常在市商业中心区游食的流浪汉，正在向一个貌似温和的过路行人说的。 "是啊，我看一点儿不错，"那个过路行人一面随声附和说，一面仔细端详这个男孩子与众不同的头和脸。那个男孩子只要一抬起脸来，便流露出忸怩不安的神情来，人们心中自然就会联想到: 本来侍奉这种含意深奥的神灵圣事，只有年岁较大。善于内省的人最为合适，可现在硬要不懂事的孩子在公开场合出现，那就有点儿不厚道和徒劳无益。 殊不知实际情况果然如此。 至于这个家里其他一些人……那最小的男孩子和女孩子，他们年纪太小，说真的根本不懂得眼前这一切是怎么回事，或者说，对他们反正也无所谓。那个弹风琴的大女儿，倒是显得满不在乎，对她本人的出场和歌声所博得的观众青睐却很得意。因为不仅是围观的陌生人，就连她父母也都不止一次地给她鼓气，说她歌声很甜美动人，其实这话说得并不完全正确。要知道她的嗓门儿不见得有那么好。她父母也并不真正懂得音乐。论体质，她苍白。柔弱，也是不过尔尔;心智上更看不出有什么真正潜力或深度。想必她自以为，这是一个绝好场合，让自己出出风头，引起人们一点注意罢了。至于她的父母，他们决心竭尽全力，净化人们心灵，使之超凡脱俗;只要赞美诗一唱完，父亲便开始老调重弹，说什么只要充分得到上帝的怜悯。基督的爱和上帝对罪人的宽恕，罪人就可以摆脱沉重地压在他心头的痛苦，从而得到种种欢乐。 "在上帝看来，人人都是有罪的，"他说，"除非他们虔心忏悔，除非他们信奉基督，接受基督对他们的爱和宽恕，要不然他们永远感受不到心灵上健全。 洁净的幸福。啊，我的朋友们! 基督为你们而生，为你们而死，每天他时时刻刻都同你们走在一起，不论白昼和黑夜，清晨和黄昏，总是在照看你们，赋予你们力量，去克服你们在人世间时刻都有的艰辛和忧患，你们只有对上面这个道理真的大彻大悟了，心中才会感到安宁和满足! 啊，要小心留神那些围在我们身边的罗网和陷坑! 幸亏我们知道: 基督永远与我们同在，劝导我们，帮助我们，激励我们，还给我们包扎伤口，使我们得以身心健全，这是足以告慰大家的! 啊，那种安宁。满足。舒适和光荣，正是我们诚心祷祝的! ""阿门，"他的妻子郑重其事地应答了一声。女儿赫思德，全家人管她叫爱思达，深感他们家里人人都需要得到众人尽量多的援助……也跟着她母亲应答了一声。 最大的男孩子克莱德，还有两个较小的孩子，他们只是两眼瞅着地面，偶尔对他们父母也瞅上一眼，心中暗自思忖: 他说的这些话，可能句句正确。重要，可是不知怎的总不象生活中其他的一些事那么有意义，那么吸引人。他的这一套……他们听得太多了，在他们这些年轻而热切的心灵看来，他们期望于生活的，显然要比在街头和教堂里传道多得多。 后来，第二首赞美诗一唱过，格里菲思太太也讲了话，顺便提到了他们在附近一条街上传过道，而且为了宣扬基督教义还作过祈祷，随后唱了第三首赞美诗，散发了一些阐述教会拯救灵魂的小册子，接着，父亲阿萨就把听众们自动捐款一一敛了起来。他们合上小风琴，把轻便折凳叠好交给克莱德，《圣经》 和赞美诗由格里菲思太太收起来，套上皮带的风琴则挂在老格里菲思肩头上，他们一行人就朝传道馆径直走去了。 整整这段时间里，克莱德一直在暗自琢磨: 这个玩意儿他再也不乐意干了。 他觉得: 刚才他和他父母都显得很愚蠢，而且不大正常……象他这样被迫卷了进去，要是让他的反感充分表达出来，那他就会说出"低级"这个词儿来;一句话，只要有办法，他再也不愿干这个了。硬是把他拽住不放，对他们究竟有什么好处呢? 他的生活不应该是这样的。人家的孩子都用不着去充当他的那种角色。他比过去更坚决地思考着要来一次反抗，以后自己就再也用不着象现在这样抛头露面了。姐姐要是乐意，那让她去就得了;反正这一套她是喜欢的。妹妹和弟弟都太小，也许还无所谓。可是他呢……"我觉得，今晚人们的注意力好象要比往常更多一点，"格里菲思一边走，一边对身旁的太太这样说。醉人的夏日夜晚的微风，使他心境为之一爽，因此，他在解释过路行人照例漠不关心的神情时，也就比较包涵。 "是的，星期四那天，只有十八个人要小册子，可是今儿晚上却有二十七个人。""基督的爱最终必胜，"做父亲的说这些话，既安慰他的太太，也算是聊以自慰。"世俗的欢乐和忧患主宰着许许多多的人，不过，只要他们到了悲痛欲绝的时候，我们现在撒下的这些种子里头，有些就生根发芽了。""这个我相信。正是这种信念，经常使我顶住了，没有倒下去。悲痛和深重的罪孽，终于会让某些人看到自己误入了歧途。"这时他们走进了一条狭窄的小街，刚才他们就是从这小街走出来的。他们从拐角处径直走过十多户人家，就进入一座黄澄澄的木头平房，它那宽大的窗子和大门上两块玻璃，都已漆成灰白色。两个窗子和那双门上几个小方格里横写着: "希望之门。非英国国教徒独立传道馆。祈祷时间: 每星期三。六，晚八时至十时;星期日，十一时。三时。八时。欢迎参加。"在这些字样下面，每个窗子上都有这么一句话: "上帝就是爱"，底下还有一行小字: "你多久没给母亲写信了? "这小拨人一走进那不起眼的黄澄澄大门，影儿就不见了。

Part 1 Chapter 2 That such a family, thus cursorily presented, might have a different and somewhat peculiar history could well beanticipated, and it would be true. Indeed, this one presented one of those anomalies of psychic and social reflexand motivation such as would tax the skill of not only the psychologist but the chemist and physicist as well, tounravel. To begin with, Asa Griffiths, the father, was one of those poorly integrated and correlated organisms,the product of an environment and a religious theory, but with no guiding or mental insight of his own, yetsensitive and therefore highly emotional and without any practical sense whatsoever. Indeed it would be hard tomake clear just how life appealed to him, or what the true hue of his emotional responses was. On the other hand,as has been indicated, his wife was of a firmer texture but with scarcely any truer or more practical insight intoanything. 　　The history of this man and his wife is of no particular interest here save as it affected their boy of twelve, ClydeGriffiths. This youth, aside from a certain emotionalism and exotic sense of romance which characterized him,and which he took more from his father than from his mother, brought a more vivid and intelligent imaginationto things, and was constantly thinking of how he might better himself, if he had a chance; places to which hemight go, things he might see, and how differently he might live, if only this, that and the other things were true. 　　The principal thing that troubled Clyde up to his fifteenth year, and for long after in retrospect, was that thecalling or profession of his parents was the shabby thing that it appeared to be in the eyes of others. For so oftenthroughout his youth in different cities in which his parents had conducted a mission or spoken on the streets-GrandRapids, Detroit, Milwaukee, Chicago, lastly Kansas City--it had been obvious that people, at least theboys and girls he encountered, looked down upon him and his brothers and sisters for being the children of suchparents. On several occasions, and much against the mood of his parents, who never countenanced suchexhibitions of temper, he had stopped to fight with one or another of these boys. But always, beaten orvictorious, he had been conscious of the fact that the work his parents did was not satisfactory to others,--shabby,trivial. And always he was thinking of what he would do, once he reached the place where he could get away. 　　For Clyde's parents had proved impractical in the matter of the future of their children. They did not understandthe importance or the essential necessity for some form of practical or professional training for each and everyone of their young ones. Instead, being wrapped up in the notion of evangelizing the world, they had neglected to keep their children in school in any one place. They had moved here and there, sometimes in the very midst of anadvantageous school season, because of a larger and better religious field in which to work. And there weretimes, when, the work proving highly unprofitable and Asa being unable to make much money at the two thingshe most understood--gardening and canvassing for one invention or another--they were quite without sufficientfood or decent clothes, and the children could not go to school. In the face of such situations as these, whateverthe children might think, Asa and his wife remained as optimistic as ever, or they insisted to themselves that theywere, and had unwavering faith in the Lord and His intention to provide. 　　The combination home and mission which this family occupied was dreary enough in most of its phases todiscourage the average youth or girl of any spirit. It consisted in its entirety of one long store floor in an old anddecidedly colorless and inartistic wooden building which was situated in that part of Kansas City which liesnorth of Independence Boulevard and west of Troost Avenue, the exact street or place being called Bickel, a veryshort thoroughfare opening off Missouri Avenue, a somewhat more lengthy but no less nondescript highway. 　　And the entire neighborhood in which it stood was very faintly and yet not agreeably redolent of a commerciallife which had long since moved farther south, if not west. It was some five blocks from the spot on which twicea week the open air meetings of these religious enthusiasts and proselytizers were held. 　　And it was the ground floor of this building, looking out into Bickel Street at the front and some dreary backyards of equally dreary frame houses, which was divided at the front into a hall forty by twenty-five feet in size,in which had been placed some sixty collapsible wood chairs, a lectern, a map of Palestine or the Holy Land, andfor wall decorations some twenty-five printed but unframed mottoes which read in part: 　　"WINE IS A MOCKER, STRONG DRINK IS RAGING AND WHOSOEVER IS DECEIVED THEREBY ISNOT WISE.""TAKE HOLD OF SHIELD AND BUCKLER, AND STAND UP FOR MINE HELP." PSALMS 35:2. 　　"AND YE, MY FLOCK, THE FLOCK OF MY PASTURE, are men, AND I AM YOUR GOD, SAITH THELORD GOD." EZEKIEL 34:31. 　　"O GOD, THOU KNOWEST MY FOOLISHNESS, AND MY SINS ARE NOT HID FROM THEE." PSALMS69:5. 　　"IF YE HAVE FAITH AS A GRAIN OF MUSTARD SEED, YE SHALL SAY UNTO THIS MOUNTAIN,REMOVE HENCE TO YONDER PLACE; AND IT SHALL MOVE; AND NOTHING SHALL BEIMPOSSIBLE TO YOU." MATTHEW 17:20. 　　"FOR THE DAY OF THE LORD IS NEAR." OBADIAH 15. 　　"FOR THERE SHALL BE NO REWARD TO THE EVIL MAN." PROVERBS 24:20. 　　"LOOK, THEN, NOT UPON THE WINE WHEN IT IS RED: IT BITETH LIKE A SERPENT, ANDSTINGETH LIKE AN ADDER." PROVERBS 23:31,32. 　　These mighty adjurations were as silver and gold plates set in a wall of dross. 　　The rear forty feet of this very commonplace floor was intricately and yet neatly divided into three smallbedrooms, a living room which overlooked the backyard and wooden fences of yards no better than those at theback; also, a combination kitchen and dining room exactly ten feet square, and a store room for mission tracts,hymnals, boxes, trunks and whatever else of non-immediate use, but of assumed value, which the family owned. 　　This particular small room lay immediately to the rear of the mission hall itself, and into it before or afterspeaking or at such times as a conference seemed important, both Mr. and Mrs. Griffiths were wont to retire-alsoat times to meditate or pray. 　　How often had Clyde and his sisters and younger brother seen his mother or father, or both, in conference withsome derelict or semi-repentant soul who had come for advice or aid, most usually for aid. And here at times,when his mother's and father's financial difficulties were greatest, they were to be found thinking, or as AsaGriffiths was wont helplessly to say at times, "praying their way out," a rather ineffectual way, as Clyde began tothink later. 　　And the whole neighborhood was so dreary and run-down that he hated the thought of living in it, let alone beingpart of a work that required constant appeals for aid, as well as constant prayer and thanksgiving to sustain it. 　　Mrs. Elvira Griffiths before she had married Asa had been nothing but an ignorant farm girl, brought up withoutmuch thought of religion of any kind. But having fallen in love with him, she had become inoculated with thevirus of Evangelism and proselytizing which dominated him, and had followed him gladly and enthusiastically inall of his ventures and through all of his vagaries. Being rather flattered by the knowledge that she could speakand sing, her ability to sway and persuade and control people with the "word of God," as she saw it, she hadbecome more or less pleased with herself on this account and so persuaded to continue. 　　Occasionally a small band of people followed the preachers to their mission, or learning of its existence throughtheir street work, appeared there later--those odd and mentally disturbed or distrait souls who are to be found inevery place. And it had been Clyde's compulsory duty throughout the years when he could not act for himself tobe in attendance at these various meetings. And always he had been more irritated than favorably influenced bythe types of men and women who came here--mostly men--down-and-out laborers, loafers, drunkards, wastrels,the botched and helpless who seemed to drift in, because they had no other place to go. And they were alwaystestifying as to how God or Christ or Divine Grace had rescued them from this or that predicament--never howthey had rescued any one else. And always his father and mother were saying "Amen" and "Glory to God," andsinging hymns and afterward taking up a collection for the legitimate expenses of the hall--collections which, ashe surmised, were little enough--barely enough to keep the various missions they had conducted in existence. 　　The one thing that really interested him in connection with his parents was the existence somewhere in the east-ina small city called Lycurgus, near Utica he understood--of an uncle, a brother of his father's, who was plainlydifferent from all this. That uncle--Samuel Griffiths by name--was rich. In one way and another, from casualremarks dropped by his parents, Clyde had heard references to certain things this particular uncle might do for aperson, if he but would; references to the fact that he was a shrewd, hard business man; that he had a great houseand a large factory in Lycurgus for the manufacture of collars and shirts, which employed not less than threehundred people; that he had a son who must be about Clyde's age, and several daughters, two at least, all of whom must be, as Clyde imagined, living in luxury in Lycurgus. News of all this had apparently been broughtwest in some way by people who knew Asa and his father and brother. As Clyde pictured this uncle, he must bea kind of Croesus, living in ease and luxury there in the east, while here in the west--Kansas City--he and hisparents and his brother and sisters were living in the same wretched and hum-drum, hand-to-mouth state that hadalways characterized their lives. 　　But for this--apart from anything he might do for himself, as he early began to see--there was no remedy. For atfifteen, and even a little earlier, Clyde began to understand that his education, as well as his sisters' and brother's,had been sadly neglected. And it would be rather hard for him to overcome this handicap, seeing that other boysand girls with more money and better homes were being trained for special kinds of work. How was one to get astart under such circumstances? Already when, at the age of thirteen, fourteen and fifteen, he began looking inthe papers, which, being too worldly, had never been admitted to his home, he found that mostly skilled help waswanted, or boys to learn trades in which at the moment he was not very much interested. For true to the standardof the American youth, or the general American attitude toward life, he felt himself above the type of laborwhich was purely manual. What! Run a machine, lay bricks, learn to be a carpenter, or a plasterer, or plumber,when boys no better than himself were clerks and druggists' assistants and bookkeepers and assistants in banksand real estate offices and such! Wasn't it menial, as miserable as the life he had thus far been leading, to wearold clothes and get up so early in the morning and do all the commonplace things such people had to do? 　　For Clyde was as vain and proud as he was poor. He was one of those interesting individuals who looked uponhimself as a thing apart--never quite wholly and indissolubly merged with the family of which he was a member,and never with any profound obligations to those who had been responsible for his coming into the world. On thecontrary, he was inclined to study his parents, not too sharply or bitterly, but with a very fair grasp of theirqualities and capabilities. And yet, with so much judgment in that direction, he was never quite able--at least notuntil he had reached his sixteenth year--to formulate any policy in regard to himself, and then only in a ratherfumbling and tentative way. 　　Incidentally by that time the sex lure or appeal had begun to manifest itself and he was already intenselyinterested and troubled by the beauty of the opposite sex, its attractions for him and his attraction for it. And,naturally and coincidentally, the matter of his clothes and his physical appearance had begun to trouble him not alittle--how he looked and how other boys looked. It was painful to him now to think that his clothes were notright; that he was not as handsome as he might be, not as interesting. What a wretched thing it was to be bornpoor and not to have any one to do anything for you and not to be able to do so very much for yourself! 　　Casual examination of himself in mirrors whenever he found them tended rather to assure him that he was not sobad-looking--a straight, well-cut nose, high white forehead, wavy, glossy, black hair, eyes that were black andrather melancholy at times. And yet the fact that his family was the unhappy thing that it was, that he had neverhad any real friends, and could not have any, as he saw it, because of the work and connection of his parents, wasnow tending more and more to induce a kind of mental depression or melancholia which promised not so wellfor his future. It served to make him rebellious and hence lethargic at times. Because of his parents, and in spiteof his looks, which were really agreeable and more appealing than most, he was inclined to misinterpret theinterested looks which were cast at him occasionally by young girls in very different walks of life from him--thecontemptuous and yet rather inviting way in which they looked to see if he were interested or disinterested, braveor cowardly. 　　And yet, before he had ever earned any money at all, he had always told himself that if only he had a bettercollar, a nicer shirt, finer shoes, a good suit, a swell overcoat like some boys had! Oh, the fine clothes, thehandsome homes, the watches, rings, pins that some boys sported; the dandies many youths of his years alreadywere! Some parents of boys of his years actually gave them cars of their own to ride in. They were to be seenupon the principal streets of Kansas City flitting to and fro like flies. And pretty girls with them. And he hadnothing. And he never had had. 　　And yet the world was so full of so many things to do--so many people were so happy and so successful. Whatwas he to do? Which way to turn? What one thing to take up and master--something that would get himsomewhere. He could not say. He did not know exactly. And these peculiar parents were in no way sufficientlyequipped to advise him.       刚才给读者粗略地介绍的这一家人，说不定有一段与众不同。多少有些特殊的家史，这是完全可以想象到的，实际上也果然是这样。说实话，这样一家人，是在诱发心理和社会动机及其反应方面都呈现出反常状态的家庭之一，倘要阐述个中奥秘，不但需要心理学家，而且还需要化学家和物理学家的熟娴技巧。先说说这个一家之主阿萨。格里菲思吧: 他是属于体内机能不够健全的一类人，是某种环境和某种宗教学说的典型产物，没有自己的主见，或者说没有自己的胆识，不过，他很敏感，因此也非常容易动感情，但是一点儿都没有务实的观念。至于他对生活究竟怀有什么样憧憬，他感情上究竟会有什么样反应，说实话，这些都很难说得清。另一方面，正如前面已经说过，他的妻子性格比较坚强，可她也不见得事事都拿得出比他更正确。更实际的高见来。 这一对夫妇的身世，要不是因为它给了他们那个十二岁的儿子克莱德。格里菲思很大影响，本来不必在这儿做特别的交待。先不说这个小伙子有个显著特点，就是比较爱动感情，喜欢罗曼蒂克情调(他的这个特点，更多的来自父亲，而不是来自母亲)，他对生活却独具慧眼，有着较为活跃的想象力;他心中不时在琢磨着: 一俟有机会，说不定就可以改善自己的境况;要是万事顺遂的话，说不定他就可以到哪些地方去，见识见识世面，那时他过的将是另一种生活了。克莱德行年已有十五，使他特别苦恼的一件事(而且以后长时间里一回想起它也仍深感苦恼)，就是: 他父母的行业，或者说专门职业，在众人心目中显得太寒伧了。 在他整个少年时期，父母在各个城市，比如说大瀑布城。底特律。密尔沃基。 芝加哥，最近还有堪萨斯城，主办传道馆，或者在街头布道;一般人，至少是他所遇见的那些男孩子和女孩子，照例都是看不起他和他的兄弟姐妹，显然因为他们就是这样一对父母所生的子女。有好几回，他竟然在路上跟这些孩子里头这一个或那一个干起仗来(这使他父母大为不满，因为他们从来都不赞成这样放肆的表现)。可是不管打败了也好，还是打赢了也好，他每次总是意识到: 父母的这个行业正是被人瞧不起的……毕竟太寒伧。太卑微了。因此，他总是在暗自思忖: 有一天，到了他能够出人头地的时候，自己又该怎么办呢。 事实上，克莱德的父母，对自己子女前途的想法，证明是不切实际的。他们根本不懂得，某种实用知识或是专门职业的训练，对他们每一个孩子来说，都是至关重要，或者说也是必不可缺的。相反，他们满脑子只想到给全世界传播福音，却忘了让自己孩子们在哪一个地方上学念书。他们经常从这个地方搬到那个地方去，即使孩子们念书正念得很顺当，为了传教工作有更广阔。更优越的活动天地，有时也得搬家。有的时候，他们的传教活动几乎完全得不到收入，阿萨从他最拿手的两件事……莳花艺草和推销新产品……又挣不到多少钱，这时他们差不多已是食不果腹，衣不蔽体，孩子们自然也就辍学了。面对这样窘况，不管孩子们会有怎么个想法，阿萨夫妇俩始终保持乐观，至少他们硬是相信自己乐观，而且毫不动摇地虔信上帝及其垂爱恩赐。 这一家人的住所兼传道馆，那里够阴惨惨的，足以使有一点儿生气的少男少女都提不起精神来。那是一座黯淡无光。毫无艺术情趣的破旧木头房子;他们占用的是整个长长的底楼。它坐落在堪萨斯城独立林荫大道以北。特鲁斯特大街以西市区内，确切的街名或地名叫比克尔。这条街很短，通向虽然稍微长些。 但同样是难以描述的密苏里街。传道馆附近这一带地方，还依稀让人不太愉快地回想起昔日生意兴隆的景象，如今这里的商业中心区早已移到西南方向去了。 在离这里五个街区的地方，有一些热心宗教的人和劝人改宗的人，每周两次举行露天聚会。 这座房子的底楼，正好面对着比克尔街，还可看到一些同样阴沉沉的木结构房子的阴沉沉的后院。底楼前头这部分，已隔成一个四十英尺长。二十五英尺宽的大厅，里面摆上大约六十把木折椅，一个诵经坛，一幅圣地巴勒斯坦地图，还有二十五张印好后尚未装框的箴言，作为墙头的装饰品，其中一部分就是: "酒能使人亵慢，浓酒使人喧嚷。凡因酒错误的，就无智慧。"(见《圣经。 旧约。箴言》第２０章。)"拿着大小的盾牌，起来帮助我。"……《诗篇》第三十五篇第二节"你们作我的羊，我草场上的羊，乃是以色列人，我也是你们的上帝，这是主耶和华说的。"……《以西结书》第三十四章第三十一节"上帝啊，我的愚昧你原知道，我的罪愆不能隐瞒。"……《诗篇》第六十九篇第五节"你们若有信心象一粒芥菜种，就是对这座山说，你从这边挪到那边，它也必挪去;并且你们没有一件不能作的事了。"……《马太福音》第十七章第二十节"耶和华降罚的日子临近万国。"……《俄巴底亚书》第十五节"因为恶人终不得善报。"……《箴言》第二十四章第二十节"酒发红，在杯中闪烁，你不可观看: 终究是咬你如蛇，刺你如毒蛇。"……《箴言》第二十三章第三十一。三十二节这些庄严有力的祈求，好象是悬在抹上灰渣的墙壁上的金银挂盘。 这一层极其普通的底楼后面尚有四十英尺，那块地方错综复杂，但又别致地一一隔开，成为三个小卧室和一个起坐间，这个起坐间既望得见后院，也望得见与后院相差无几。毗邻的一些院子里的木栅栏。此外还有一间恰好十英尺见方的厨房，同时也兼作餐室;一间贮藏室，里面置放着传道用的小册子和赞美诗集，以及盒子。箱子和家里一时不用但又被认为有价值的一些零星什物。这个特殊的小房间，紧挨在传道大厅后面，格里菲思夫妇在讲道以前，或是在讲道之后，或是有要紧的事商量的时候，照例要到这里来……不过也有的时候，他们来这里沉思默想或者做祈祷。 克莱德和他的姐姐，还有他的弟弟，三天两头看到他们的母亲或者父亲，有时单独，有时两人一道，跟一个被遗弃了的。或则稍有悔罪之意的人谈话。 这些人是来这里寻求忠告或者帮助的，往往多半是来寻求帮助的。有时，正好他的父母手头特别紧，孩子们就看见他们俩待在这里冥思苦索，或者正如阿萨。 格里菲思常常在一筹莫展时所说的，就是要"祷告上帝给他们指出一条出路来"。 后来克莱德心中开始琢磨，这实在也是无济于事的。 他家周围整个地区，也都是那样阴暗。凋敝，克莱德一想到自己住在这个地区就很腻味，更不用提……经常要向人恳求帮助，自己也不得不参予其事，而且，为了支持起见，还得经常祷告上帝和感谢天恩。 爱尔薇拉。格里菲思太太在嫁给阿萨以前，只不过是一个没受过教育的农场姑娘，即使长大成人，也很少想到过宗教这一类事情。哪知道她一爱上了他以后，就好象中了他传播福音和劝人改宗的毒。以后，不管他要担多大风险，或则玩弄种种希奇百怪的花招，她总是欣喜若狂地追随他。后来她知道自己能说会唱，居然还能利用她已知道的"上帝所说的话"去影响。开导。支配别人，不免感到沾沾自喜，对此她也就多少有些心安理得，乐意继续干下去了。 偶尔也有一小拨人，跟着这两位传教士径直来到了他们的传道馆，或者是因为听他们在街头传道时提到过这个传道馆，事后才登上门来的……这些稀奇古怪。心神不安，乃至于神经错乱的人，眼下是到哪儿都有的。由于克莱德目前还不能自立，多年来他就只好到各式各样的宗教集会上奉陪他的父母了。到这里来的各色人等的男男女女……十之八九为男人……有穷困潦倒的工人，有无业游民，有酒鬼和流浪汉，还有那些孤苦无告。其丑无比的人……看来他们就是因为没有别的地方可去，这才踅到这里来……对于这些人，克莱德与其说有好感，还不如说生气。他们一向证明上帝。基督或是神灵怎样把他们从这个或那个困境中拯救出来，可他们从来没有说过他们自己拯救过别人的事。他的父母总是唠叨着说"阿门"和"光荣归于上帝"，接着唱赞美诗，最后为传道馆的正当开支募集捐款。捐款的数目，据他估算，少得可怜，只够维持他们现有的各式各样的传道活动。 关于他的父母，只有一件事真的使他感到兴趣，那就是: 在东部某处……在一个叫做莱柯格斯的小城，据他所知，靠近尤蒂卡(纽约州中部一城市。)……有一位伯父，亦即他父亲的哥哥。他伯父的生活境况跟他们显然大不一样。伯父名叫塞缪尔。格里菲思，是个有钱人。克莱德从父母偶尔闲谈中多次听说过: 这位伯父只要随他高兴，就肯给某个人一点帮助;他还是一个精明而又严厉的商人;他在莱柯格斯有一所巨邸和一个生产领子和衬衫的大工厂，雇用工人不少于三百人;他有个儿子，年纪想必跟克莱德相差无几，还有好几个女儿，少说也有两个，据克莱德猜想，他们在莱柯格斯一定都过着奢靡的生活。以上所有这些消息，显然都由那些认识阿萨及其父兄的人捎到西部来的。在克莱德的想象中，这位伯父想必是好象克里塞斯(克里塞斯是公元前六世纪小亚细亚吕底亚国极富的国王。)那一类人，在东部过着舒适奢靡的生活。可是在西部这里……堪萨斯城，他跟他的父母。兄弟姐妹的生活，一言以蔽之，依然是那么可怜。乏味，仅仅足以糊口罢了。 不过，克莱德很早就看得清清楚楚，除了他能自立以外，别无他法可想了。 他在十五岁时，甚至更早一些，就开始懂得: 他自己的教育，还有他的姐妹。弟弟的教育，不幸全被他父母耽误了。由于那些家境较为殷实的少男少女都接受专门技能的教育，他要克服自己的困境，自然就更难了。在这样的境况下，他一开始该从哪儿着手呢? 其实，他在十三。十四。十五岁时，就开始浏览各种报纸了，可是他家里从来不许看报的(因为看报已被视作太世俗的事了)。他得悉现下到处需要有熟练技术的人，或是受过专门职业训练的学徒，不过当时他对此却不是很感兴趣。正如一般美国青年的想法，或则普通美国人的人生观一样，克莱德觉得自己凌驾于纯粹体力劳动者那一类人之上。天下居然还有这样的事! 那些比他好不了多少的小伙子，都当上了店员，杂货铺的帮手，以及银行和地产公司里的会计和助手，难道说他就得去开机器，砌砖头，学做木工。泥水活和水暖管子工吗! 要是叫他身穿旧衣服，每天一清早爬起来，就象那些人一样，不得不去干那些平淡无奇的事情，岂不是太低三下四，如同他迄至今日的生活一样窝囊吗? 克莱德既穷而又很爱虚荣和骄傲。他就是自命不凡的那一号人……他虽然是家中一员，可他跟家从来不是水乳交融，甚至于对有养育之恩的人，也从来没有深切感激之情。相反，他喜欢仔细琢磨他的父母，虽然并不太尖锐或者太刻薄，可是对他们的素质和能力却有了充分了解。不过，尽管他对别人很有判断力，可对自己的前途，心中却始终没有谱，即便到了十六岁那年，也才只有一些尚在摸索的试探性的想法。 顺便提一下，就在这时候，性的诱惑，或者干脆说性感，不知不觉地开始在他身上显露出来了。对于异性的美。异性对他的引吸力，以及他对异性的吸引力，他早已引起了强烈的兴趣，同时，他也为此感到很烦恼。再说，很自然地，与此同时产生的衣着和仪表这类问题，也开始给他带来不少烦恼……瞧他自己的外表是怎样的，而人家的小伙子的外表又是怎样的? 如今，他一想到自己的衣服不行，又不能打扮得更漂亮些，以便自己更加吸引人，就觉得很痛苦。 生来就是穷，既没有人帮助过你，自己又没有能耐助自己一臂之力，那该有多么可怜啊! 他只要见到镜子，总要把自己仔细端详一番。他相信自己模样儿长得并不太难看……端正大方的鼻子，白白净净的高额角，油光锃亮的波浪型黑头发，乌溜溜的眼睛有时含有几分郁色。可是由于他家里的不幸，父母的职业性质，以及种种人际关系，真正的朋友不仅过去他没有过，而且，依他看，现在也不见得能找到: 这一事实越来越诱发他心情坠入抑郁，亦即所谓忧郁症，对他的将来自然毫无好处。这反而促使他想要反抗，但有时候精神上却又萎靡不振。尽管他的仪表说真的很讨人喜欢，吸引力也比一般人更大，可是，当那些社会阶层与他迥然不同的年轻姑娘偶尔向他投以一瞥时，他就是因为一想到自己父母的德行，往往误解了她们的用意，其实，她们这种轻蔑而又存心逗引的神色，不外乎要试探一下: 他对她们到底是喜欢呢，还是毫无意思;他这个人究竟是好样儿呢，还是个胆小鬼。 不过话又说回来，即使在他连一个子儿还都没有挣到之前，他一直在暗自思忖: 要是他象别的小伙子那样，也有一条好一点的衣领。一件漂亮一点的衬衫。 一双好看一点的皮鞋，还有一套做工讲究的衣服。一件阔气的大衣，该有多好! 啊! 高级衣服。漂亮房子，以及手表。戒指和别针等等，多少小伙子一一拿来出风头啊! 还有那些象他那样年龄的男孩子……现在都是花花公子! 有些与他同龄的男孩子，做父母的真的给他们买了汽车，供他们兜风去哩。克莱德看见他们象蝇子似的在堪萨斯城大街上飞来飞去。而且他们身边还有漂亮女郎陪着。可他却什么都没有。而且，他从来就是未曾有过啊。 不过，世界上可做的事情多着呢……幸福。得意的人儿也是到处都有。现在克莱德，他该怎么办呢? 到底走哪一条路呢? 究竟应该选定哪一行，学好了，将来使他出人头地呢? 这些他都说不上来。他毕竟还闹不清楚。就连他那古里古怪的父母。也是孤陋寡闻，没法给他点拨一下。

Part 1 Chapter 3 One of the things that served to darken Clyde's mood just about the time when he was seeking some practicalsolution for himself, to say nothing of its profoundly disheartening effect on the Griffiths family as a whole, wasthe fact that his sister Esta, in whom he took no little interest (although they really had very little in common),ran away from home with an actor who happened to be playing in Kansas City and who took a passing fancy forher. 　　The truth in regard to Esta was that in spite of her guarded up-bringing, and the seeming religious and moralfervor which at times appeared to characterize her, she was just a sensuous, weak girl who did not by any meansknow yet what she thought. Despite the atmosphere in which she moved, essentially she was not of it. Like thelarge majority of those who profess and daily repeat the dogmas and creeds of the world, she had come into herpractices and imagined attitude so insensibly from her earliest childhood on, that up to this time, and even later,she did not know the meaning of it all. For the necessity of thought had been obviated by advice and law, or"revealed" truth, and so long as other theories or situations and impulses of an external or even internal, characterdid not arise to clash with these, she was safe enough. Once they did, however, it was a foregone conclusion thather religious notions, not being grounded on any conviction or temperamental bias of her own, were not likely towithstand the shock. So that all the while, and not unlike her brother Clyde, her thoughts as well as her emotionswere wandering here and there--to love, to comfort--to things which in the main had little, if anything, to dowith any self-abnegating and self-immolating religious theory. Within her was a chemism of dreams whichsomehow counteracted all they had to say. 　　Yet she had neither Clyde's force, nor, on the other hand, his resistance. She was in the main a drifter, with avague yearning toward pretty dresses, hats, shoes, ribbons and the like, and super-imposed above this, thereligious theory or notion that she should not be. There were the long bright streets of a morning and afternoonafter school or of an evening. The charm of certain girls swinging along together, arms locked, secrets a-whispering, or that of boys, clownish, yet revealing through their bounding ridiculous animality the force andmeaning of that chemistry and urge toward mating which lies back of all youthful thought and action. And in herself, as from time to time she observed lovers or flirtation-seekers who lingered at street corners or aboutdoorways, and who looked at her in a longing and seeking way, there was a stirring, a nerve plasm palpitationthat spoke loudly for all the seemingly material things of life, not for the thin pleasantries of heaven. 　　And the glances drilled her like an invisible ray, for she was pleasing to look at and was growing more attractivehourly. And the moods in others awakened responsive moods in her, those rearranging chemisms upon which allthe morality or immorality of the world is based. 　　And then one day, as she was coming home from school, a youth of that plausible variety known as "masher"engaged her in conversation, largely because of a look and a mood which seemed to invite it. And there was littleto stay her, for she was essentially yielding, if not amorous. Yet so great had been her home drilling as to theneed of modesty, circumspection, purity and the like, that on this occasion at least there was no danger of anyimmediate lapse. Only this attack once made, others followed, were accepted, or not so quickly fled from, and bydegrees, these served to break down that wall of reserve which her home training had served to erect. Shebecame secretive and hid her ways from her parents. 　　Youths occasionally walked and talked with her in spite of herself. They demolished that excessive shynesswhich had been hers, and which had served to put others aside for a time at least. She wished for other contacts-dreamedof some bright, gay, wonderful love of some kind, with some one. 　　Finally, after a slow but vigorous internal growth of mood and desire, there came this actor, one of those vain,handsome, animal personalities, all clothes and airs, but no morals (no taste, no courtesy or real tenderness even),but of compelling magnetism, who was able within the space of one brief week and a few meetings to completelybefuddle and enmesh her so that she was really his to do with as he wished. And the truth was that he scarcelycared for her at all. To him, dull as he was, she was just another girl--fairly pretty, obviously sensuous andinexperienced, a silly who could be taken by a few soft words--a show of seemingly sincere affection, talk of theopportunity of a broader, freer life on the road, in other great cities, as his wife. 　　And yet his words were those of a lover who would be true forever. All she had to do, as he explained to her, wasto come away with him and be his bride, at once--now. Delay was so vain when two such as they had met. Therewas difficulty about marriage here, which he could not explain--it related to friends--but in St. Louis he had apreacher friend who would wed them. She was to have new and better clothes than she had ever known,delicious adventures, love. She would travel with him and see the great world. She would never need to troublemore about anything save him; and while it was truth to her--the verbal surety of a genuine passion--to him itwas the most ancient and serviceable type of blarney, often used before and often successful. 　　In a single week then, at odd hours, morning, afternoon and night, this chemic witchery was accomplished. 　　Coming home rather late one Saturday night in April from a walk which he had taken about the business heart, inorder to escape the regular Saturday night mission services, Clyde found his mother and father worried about thewhereabouts of Esta. She had played and sung as usual at this meeting. And all had seemed all right with her. 　　After the meeting she had gone to her room, saying that she was not feeling very well and was going to bedearly. But by eleven o'clock, when Clyde returned, her mother had chanced to look into her room and discoveredthat she was not there nor anywhere about the place. A certain bareness in connection with the room--some trinkets and dresses removed, an old and familiar suitcase gone--had first attracted her mother's attention. Thenthe house search proving that she was not there, Asa had gone outside to look up and down the street. Shesometimes walked out alone, or sat or stood in front of the mission during its idle or closed hours. 　　This search revealing nothing, Clyde and he had walked to a corner, then along Missouri Avenue. No Esta. Attwelve they returned and after that, naturally, the curiosity in regard to her grew momentarily sharper. 　　At first they assumed that she might have taken an unexplained walk somewhere, but as twelve-thirty, and finallyone, and one-thirty, passed, and no Esta, they were about to notify the police, when Clyde, going into her room,saw a note pinned to the pillow of her small wooden bed--a missive that had escaped the eye of his mother. Atonce he went to it, curious and comprehending, for he had often wondered in what way, assuming that he everwished to depart surreptitiously, he would notify his parents, for he knew they would never countenance hisdeparture unless they were permitted to supervise it in every detail. And now here was Esta missing, and herewas undoubtedly some such communication as he might have left. He picked it up, eager to read it, but at thatmoment his mother came into the room and, seeing it in his hand, exclaimed: "What's that? A note? Is it fromher?" He surrendered it and she unfolded it, reading it quickly. He noted that her strong broad face, alwaystanned a reddish brown, blanched as she turned away toward the outer room. Her biggish mouth was now set in afirm, straight line. Her large, strong hand shook the least bit as it held the small note aloft. 　　"Asa!" she called, and then tramping into the next room where he was, his frizzled grayish hair curlingdistractedly above his round head, she said: "Read this."Clyde, who had followed, saw him take it a little nervously in his pudgy hands, his lips, always weak andbeginning to crinkle at the center with age, now working curiously. Any one who had known his life's historywould have said it was the expression, slightly emphasized, with which he had received most of the untowardblows of his life in the past. 　　"Tst! Tst! Tst!" was the only sound he made at first, a sucking sound of the tongue and palate--most weak andinadequate, it seemed to Clyde. Next there was another "Tst! Tst! Tst!", his head beginning to shake from side toside. Then, "Now, what do you suppose could have caused her to do that?" Then he turned and gazed at his wife,who gazed blankly in return. Then, walking to and fro, his hands behind him, his short legs taking unconsciousand queerly long steps, his head moving again, he gave vent to another ineffectual "Tst! Tst! Tst!"Always the more impressive, Mrs. Griffiths now showed herself markedly different and more vital in this tryingsituation, a kind of irritation or dissatisfaction with life itself, along with an obvious physical distress, seeming topass through her like a visible shadow. Once her husband had gotten up, she reached out and took the note, thenmerely glared at it again, her face set in hard yet stricken and disturbing lines. Her manner was that of one who isintensely disquieted and dissatisfied, one who fingers savagely at a material knot and yet cannot undo it, one whoseeks restraint and freedom from complaint and yet who would complain bitterly, angrily. For behind her wereall those years of religious work and faith, which somehow, in her poorly integrated conscience, seemed dimly toindicate that she should justly have been spared this. Where was her God, her Christ, at this hour when thisobvious evil was being done? Why had He not acted for her? How was He to explain this? His Biblicalpromises! His perpetual guidance! His declared mercies! 　　In the face of so great a calamity, it was very hard for her, as Clyde could see, to get this straightened out,instantly at least. Although, as Clyde had come to know, it could be done eventually, of course. For in someblind, dualistic way both she and Asa insisted, as do all religionists, in disassociating God from harm and errorand misery, while granting Him nevertheless supreme control. They would seek for something else--somemalign, treacherous, deceiving power which, in the face of God's omniscience and omnipotence, still beguilesand betrays--and find it eventually in the error and perverseness of the human heart, which God has made, yetwhich He does not control, because He does not want to control it. 　　At the moment, however, only hurt and rage were with her, and yet her lips did not twitch as did Asa's, nor didher eyes show that profound distress which filled his. Instead she retreated a step and reexamined the letter,almost angrily, then said to Asa: "She's run away with some one and she doesn't say--" Then she stoppedsuddenly, remembering the presence of the children--Clyde, Julia, and Frank, all present and all gazingcuriously, intently, unbelievingly. "Come in here," she called to her husband, "I want to talk to you a minute. 　　You children had better go on to bed. We'll be out in a minute."With Asa then she retired quite precipitately to a small room back of the mission hall. They heard her click theelectric bulb. Then their voices were heard in low converse, while Clyde and Julia and Frank looked at eachother, although Frank, being so young--only ten--could scarcely be said to have comprehended fully. Even Juliahardly gathered the full import of it. But Clyde, because of his larger contact with life and his mother's statement("She's run away with some one"), understood well enough. Esta had tired of all this, as had he. Perhaps therewas some one, like one of those dandies whom he saw on the streets with the prettiest girls, with whom she hadgone. But where? And what was he like? That note told something, and yet his mother had not let him see it. Shehad taken it away too quickly. If only he had looked first, silently and to himself! 　　"Do you suppose she's run away for good?" he asked Julia dubiously, the while his parents were out of the room,Julia herself looking so blank and strange. 　　"How should I know?" she replied a little irritably, troubled by her parents' distress and this secretiveness, aswell as Esta's action. "She never said anything to me. I should think she'd be ashamed of herself if she has."Julia, being colder emotionally than either Esta or Clyde, was more considerate of her parents in a conventionalway, and hence sorrier. True, she did not quite gather what it meant, but she suspected something, for she hadtalked occasionally with girls, but in a very guarded and conservative way. Now, however, it was more the wayin which Esta had chosen to leave, deserting her parents and her brothers and herself, that caused her to be angrywith her, for why should she go and do anything which would distress her parents in this dreadful fashion. It wasdreadful. The air was thick with misery. 　　And as his parents talked in their little room, Clyde brooded too, for he was intensely curious about life now. 　　What was it Esta had really done? Was it, as he feared and thought, one of those dreadful runaway or sexuallydisagreeable affairs which the boys on the streets and at school were always slyly talking about? How shameful,if that were true! She might never come back. She had gone with some man. There was something wrong aboutthat, no doubt, for a girl, anyhow, for all he had ever heard was that all decent contacts between boys and girls,men and women, led to but one thing--marriage. And now Esta, in addition to their other troubles, had gone anddone this. Certainly this home life of theirs was pretty dark now, and it would be darker instead of brighter because of this. 　　Presently the parents came out, and then Mrs. Griffiths' face, if still set and constrained, was somehow a littledifferent, less savage perhaps, more hopelessly resigned. 　　"Esta's seen fit to leave us, for a little while, anyhow," was all she said at first, seeing the children waitingcuriously. "Now, you're not to worry about her at all, or think any more about it. She'll come back after a while,I'm sure. She has chosen to go her own way, for a time, for some reason. The Lord's will be done." ("Blessed bethe name of the Lord!" interpolated Asa.) "I thought she was happy here with us, but apparently she wasn't. Shemust see something of the world for herself, I suppose." (Here Asa put in another Tst! Tst! Tst!) "But we mustn'tharbor hard thoughts. That won't do any good now--only thoughts of love and kindness." Yet she said this with akind of sternness that somehow belied it--a click of the voice, as it were. "We can only hope that she will soonsee how foolish she has been, and unthinking, and come back. She can't prosper on the course she's going now. Itisn't the Lord's way or will. She's too young and she's made a mistake. But we can forgive her. We must. Ourhearts must be kept open, soft and tender." She talked as though she were addressing a meeting, but with a hard,sad, frozen face and voice. "Now, all of you go to bed. We can only pray now, and hope, morning, noon andnight, that no evil will befall her. I wish she hadn't done that," she added, quite out of keeping with the rest of herstatement and really not thinking of the children as present at all--just of Esta. 　　But Asa! 　　Such a father, as Clyde often thought, afterwards. 　　Apart from his own misery, he seemed only to note and be impressed by the more significant misery of his wife. 　　During all this, he had stood foolishly to one side--short, gray, frizzled, inadequate. 　　"Well, blessed be the name of the Lord," he interpolated from time to time. "We must keep our hearts open. Yes,we mustn't judge. We must only hope for the best. Yes, yes! Praise the Lord--we must praise the Lord! Amen! 　　Oh, yes! Tst! Tst! Tst!""If any one asks where she is," continued Mrs. Griffiths after a time, quite ignoring her spouse and addressing thechildren, who had drawn near her, "we will say that she has gone on a visit to some of my relatives back inTonawanda. That won't be the truth, exactly, but then we don't know where she is or what the truth is--and shemay come back. So we must not say or do anything that will injure her until we know.""Yes, praise the Lord!" called Asa, feebly. 　　"So if any one should inquire at any time, until we know, we will say that.""Sure," put in Clyde, helpfully, and Julia added, "All right."Mrs. Griffiths paused and looked firmly and yet apologetically at her children. Asa, for his part, emitted another"Tst! Tst! Tst!" and then the children were waved to bed. 　　At that, Clyde, who really wanted to know what Esta's letter had said, but was convinced from long experiencethat his mother would not let him know unless she chose, returned to his room again, for he was tired. Why didn'tthey search more if there was hope of finding her? Where was she now--at this minute? On some trainsomewhere? Evidently she didn't want to be found. She was probably dissatisfied, just as he was. Here he was,thinking so recently of going away somewhere himself, wondering how the family would take it, and now shehad gone before him. How would that affect his point of view and action in the future? Truly, in spite of hisfather's and mother's misery, he could not see that her going was such a calamity, not from the GOING point ofview, at any rate. It was only another something which hinted that things were not right here. Mission work wasnothing. All this religious emotion and talk was not so much either. It hadn't saved Esta. Evidently, like himself,she didn't believe so much in it, either.       克莱德正在给自己寻摸一个切实解决办法，恰好这时家里遇到了一些麻烦事，使他心绪越发灰暗了。其中有一件事，就是: 他的姐姐爱思达跟一个难得上堪萨斯城演出。闪电式爱上她的演员离家私奔了。(尽管他相当疼她的，但说实话，他们俩之间毫无共同语言)这一件事弄得格里菲思全家人如何灰心丧气，也就不用说了。 爱思达事件真相是这样的: 尽管她是在严格的教育之下长大，有时似乎对宗教和道德还怀着满腔热忱，其实，她只不过是一个性感丰富。意志薄弱的女孩子，她心里究竟在想些什么，连她自己也说不清。她虽在那个特殊的环境中生活着，可她压根儿和它格格不入。如同绝大多数的人只是整日价嘴上笃信宗教一样，她从很小时候起，就不假思索地把这些宗教信条都接受下来了，到如今，乃至于在以后，爱思达也还是一点儿不理解它们的意义。至于这些天天重复念叨的宗教信条究竟包含什么意思，反正有了家训。教规，以及"天启"的真理，她早已用不着自己去独立思考了;只要别的学说，别的情况，以及来自外界的。或者甚至出自内心的一些冲动还没有同上面那些东西发生冲突，那她就可以高枕无忧了。可是话又说回来，一旦真的发生了冲突，由于她的宗教观不是建立在个人信仰，或则个人气质倾向的基础之上，大概经受不住这一冲击，那也是早就可以预料的结论。因此，爱思达的思想感情未必和她的弟弟克莱德不同，原来也是一天到晚从这到那，飘忽不定……一会儿想到爱情，一会儿又想到享乐生活……一会儿却想到了那些跟自我克制。自我牺牲这类教义也许根本不相干的事情。一句话，她整个内心世界，以及她所有的梦想，都把人们宣扬的所有宗教教规通通给抵消了。 可是，她毕竟没有克莱德那种毅力，也没有他那种反抗性。她基本上是个随波逐流的人，朦朦胧胧地渴望着漂亮的衣服。鞋帽和缎带之类的东西，而宗教教规或宗教观念，则不准她梦想追求这些东西。不论在上午或下午放学以后，或是在傍晚，在那些长长的。五光十色的街道上，常有一些可爱的姑娘们一面手挽手大摇大摆地闲逛着，一面还在交头接耳，窃窃私语。也有一些男孩子，固然有些滑稽笨拙，可是透过他们那种鲜活蹦跳而又十分可笑的动物本性，却显露出了隐藏在所有年轻人的思想和行动后面的求偶那种执著。本能的渴望。 而她自己呢，当她不时看到一些求爱的恋人，或是专门调情取乐的人，逗留在大街拐角处或大门口，用一种炽烈渴求的目光直瞅着她，她自己心里不由得也有一种激动，一种神经原形质的颤动，它大声渴求着人世间所有看得见。摸得着的东西，而不是有关天堂的那些令人难以置信的玩笑话。 那些年轻人向她投来的眼色，好象一道看不见的光，穿透了她整个的身心，就是因为她出落得很讨人喜欢，而且每时每刻在增姿添色，长得越来越吸引人了。再说，年轻人的心态，已在她心中引起共鸣，这些神妙的。不可思议的化学反应，便成为人世间一切道德和不道德的基础。 却说有一天，她正在放学回家路上，有一个年轻人(这种人能说会道，通称沾花拈草的浪荡子)竟然凑上来跟她搭讪，恐怕多半是她自己显露出的一种神色和一种心态惹出来的。反正什么都遏制不住她，因为她哪怕不是个情种，从天性上来说还是百依百顺的。不过，她的家教历来很严，要求她务必保持端庄。 谨慎。纯洁等等，因此，至少说这一回还不至于有马上失足的危险。只是经过这一次进攻，以后进攻也就接踵而至，何况都被她接受了，或者说她并没有很快躲避闪开。于是，这些进攻便一步逼一步地把她的家教所筑成的那堵冷漠围墙推倒。她本人也变得行动诡秘，还向父母隐瞒自己的所作所为。 偶尔也有一些年轻人，不管她乐意不乐意，竟然跟着她一起，边走边谈了。 她一向非常害羞，开头至少有一阵子常常把他们甩在一边，不予理睬。可如今她那种过分的羞态，终于被他们摧毁了。她心里巴不得有一些新的巧遇……梦想着自己跟什么人来一场漂亮。快活。惊人的恋爱。 这种心态和欲念在她心里缓慢有力地日益增长之后，终于来了这么一个演员: 他是爱好虚荣。漂亮，而又兽性十足的那种人，一味讲究穿着。气派，可是品德不好(他格调不高，缺乏礼貌，甚至也许连真正的柔情都没有)，但他身上却有一种非常强烈的男性魅力。短短一星期里，仅仅见过一两次面，他居然就使她完全神魂颠倒，坠入情网，说真的，她样样都听他随意摆布了。事实上，他压根儿不疼爱她。这个人尽管并不聪明，可他却认为: 她只不过是又一个黄花闺女罢了……长得相当漂亮，显然是性欲强。毫无经验，一两句甜言蜜语准定上钩的傻丫头……只要来上一番虚情假意，说什么她要是做了他的妻子，赶明儿管包带她上大城市逛逛，过上更加无拘无束。自由自在的生活就得了。 不过，乍一听，他所说的话，倒是很象出自一个忠贞不渝的情人之口。他对她说得明明白白，只要她马上跟他一块儿走，成为他的新娘……现在就走，切莫磨蹭。眼下象他们这样两个人，既然有缘在此相遇，干吗还要白白地拖延时间呢。至于就在此地结婚，是有困难的，其原因他不好说……反正这要牵扯到他的一些朋友……不过在圣路易，他倒是有一个朋友做牧师的，可以给他们证婚。以后，她就会有从来没有见过的漂亮衣服，形形色色妙不可言的奇遇，以及卿卿我我的缱绻柔情。她还可以跟他一块儿旅游去，饱览一下这个大千世界。她只要好好照应他，再也用不着发愁了。这些话她都信以为真……看做真情流露的山盟海誓……而在他看来，只不过是他过去惯用，往往又很灵验的老一套花言巧语。 短短的一星期里，他们利用早晨。午后和夜晚零星时间见面，这套不难耍弄的魔术终于获得成功了。 有一回，在四月里一个星期六夜晚，克莱德为了逃避照例要在周末举行的传道活动，独自到商业中心区去，很晚才回家。他一下子就发现父母因为不知爱思达下落而非常焦急。她在当天晚上传道时，还照常弹琴，唱赞美诗，看来一切都很正常。结束以后，她回到了自己房间，说她身体不大舒服，打算早点上床。可是到了晚上十一点钟，克莱德刚好回到家里的时候，母亲无意中往她房里张望了一下，却发现她不在房里，而且附近地方也找不见她。她的房间里已有一点空荡荡的样子……有些小首饰和衣服给带走了，一只常用的旧手提箱也不见了……首先引起了她母亲的注意。随后，在家里到处搜寻，结果也都找不着她;于是，阿萨走到了大街上，往四下里张望。本来传道馆空着的时候，或是在关门之后，有时候她也曾独个儿出门去的，也有的时候，她就在传道馆前面闲坐或是伫立一会儿。 尽管这样搜寻还是一无所得，克莱德和阿萨一起，先是跑到大街上拐角处去找，随后沿着密苏里大街径直走去。哪儿都不见爱思达的影儿。他们深夜十二点钟才回来;从那以后，全家人对她自然就越来越揪心了。 开头，他们认为说不定她事先没有关照，就到什么地方去了。可是，等到十二点半，最后到一点。一点半，还是不见爱思达的影儿。他们正要去报警，这时克莱德走进了她的房间，发现她那张小木床上有一张条子，用别针扎在枕头上……这一纸短信，就在母亲的眼皮底下也没看见。他马上走了过去，心里一面好奇，一面在揣度。因为他常常暗自琢磨，假定说他想要偷偷地不告而别，究竟该用什么方式告诉他的父母才好。他知道，除非全部计划乃至于每一个细节事先都让他们了解，他们是决不会同意他离去的。而现在呢，爱思达终于失踪了。当然，以后他自己说不定也会留下这样的告父母书。他捡起了这个条子，急急乎要看，偏巧他母亲走了进来，发现他手里拿着一张条子，就大声嚷嚷: "那是什么呀? 是一个条子吗? 难道就是她写的? "克莱德把条子交给了她，她把它摊开来，赶紧看了一遍。本来他母亲那张健壮的大脸盘一向黑里透红，这时他发现，她转身朝外屋走去时，脸色已经煞白。她那张相当大的嘴巴，紧紧地抿成了一条有力的直线。她那结实有力的大手，高高地举起那张小小便条，一面有一点儿在发抖了。 "阿萨! "她大声惊呼，往隔壁房间走去。阿萨正在那里，白花花的鬈发好象心烦意乱地盘缠在他那滚圆的脑袋周围。她说: "看这个吧。"克莱德跟在母亲后面，看见父亲又短又肥的手里有些紧张不安地拿着那张条子。本来他的嘴唇一向疲沓无力，又因年岁渐老，中间开始皱缩，说来真怪，这会儿却一个劲儿抽动起来。凡是了解他身世的人，一定会说，这正是他过去一生中屡遭不幸打击时的一种表情，不过此刻尤为突出罢了。 开头，他只发出"Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! "的声音，是舌头与上颚之间的吸入音……这在克莱德听来，未免太软弱无力了。接下来又是一迭连声"Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! "他的脑袋已开始东摇西晃。随后，他说: "喂，你说说，她干吗会做出这样的事来? "说完，他又转过身来，直瞅着他的妻子，她也无可奈何地直瞅着他。 后来，他就背着双手，在房间里踱来踱去，他的两条短腿正迈着无意识而又古怪的大步，脑袋又来回摇晃，而且再一次发出一迭连声徒呼奈何的"Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! "格里菲思太太给人印象一向比她丈夫要深刻得多，如今处于这种尴尬的境地，果然表现得很不一样，确实更加富有魄力。对于人生的激忿。不满，以及显然是一种肉体上的痛苦，有如一道看得见的影子，在她身上掠过。她的丈夫一站起来，她马上伸过手去，把那张条子接住，两眼又一次直瞅它，脸上立时露出严峻。痛苦，而又心烦意乱的表情。她的这种举止态度，就象一个心神极度紊乱而又不满的人，虽然狠命地在使劲儿，还是解不开一个有形的结;同时又想要自己保持镇静，心中不再忿忿不平，到头来却依然苦恼。怨恨。按说她长年累月一贯虔诚地从事传道工作，根据她那低得可怜的是非标准来看，仿佛觉得，她自己实在应该免遭这类不幸的了! 当这种彰明昭著的恶行尚在的时候，她的上帝。她的基督，究竟都上哪儿去了? 为什么他没有帮助她呢? 这一点他该如何解释呢? 他在《圣经》里说过的那些预言呢? 他要永远指引众人呢! 还有他明明白白说过的仁慈呢? 克莱德清楚地看到，面对这样巨大的灾祸，她想把个中原委找到是极其困难的，至少在眼前做不到。不过，最后一定是会找到的，这一点，当然，克莱德心里也是明白的。因为她和阿萨正如所有热心宗教人士一样，根据他们那种盲目的二元论观点，坚信灾祸。错误和不幸，跟上帝一概无涉，同时又认定上帝是至高无上的。主宰一切的力量。将来他们会在别的什么地方找到了祸根……某种邪恶。奸险。欺骗的力量，有违上帝的全知全能，照旧诱惑和欺骗人们……说到底，归罪于人们心中的谬误和邪恶;虽然人心也是上帝造出来的，可是，他并不抑制它，因为他根本不愿抑制它。 不过此时此刻，她只是在心中充满痛苦和愤怒，可她的嘴唇既不象阿萨那样抽动，她的眼睛也不象他那样露出深切的悲痛。她往后退了一步，有点气呼呼地把爱思达的信又细看了一遍，然后对阿萨说: "她跟人私奔了，可她又不言语一声……"她突然语塞了，一想到孩子们……克莱德。朱丽娅和弗兰克全都在场，而且个个好奇地。全神贯注地。心中怀疑地凝视着她。"上这儿来，"她对她丈夫说，"我要跟你说句话。孩子们，你们还是先睡去吧。我们一会儿就回来。"于是，她和阿萨一起急冲冲走进了传道馆大厅后面那个小房间。孩子们听见母亲扭电灯开关的声音。接下来听见父母压低声音在谈话，这时克莱德。朱丽娅和弗兰克面面相觑，只不过弗兰克还太小……仅仅十岁……恐怕说不上完全懂得这是怎么回事。甚至于朱丽娅也不见得非常明白。不过，克莱德毕竟见过一点世面，又听到母亲说的"她跟人私奔了"那句话，所以说，就他心里最透亮了。爱思达对这一套腻味透了，就象他一样。也许正是他在大街上看见过的。 挽着漂亮姑娘的那类花花公子……爱思达就同此人一起私奔了。不过，上哪儿去了? 此人……到底是个什么样的人呢? 那张便条上想必说了一些，但是母亲没让他看。她一下子就把便条拿走了。可惜那时他没有一声不响地先看一下! "你说她这一去，就永远不会回来吗? "他趁父母一走出房间，就怀疑地问朱丽娅。看来朱丽娅也茫然不知所措。 "我怎么会知道呢? "她有些恼火地回答说，她对父母的不幸和这种鬼鬼祟祟的神气，以及爱思达的所作所为觉得很难受。"她什么都没有跟我说过。我想，她要是真的跟我说了，准会感到害臊。"朱丽娅在诉诸感情方面，要比爱思达或克莱德冷静些，对父母一向体贴入微，所以也就比兄姐他们更加伤心了。诚然，她对这件事的意义并没有完全理解，不过，她有些猜测，因为她跟别的女孩子偶尔也扯过，哪怕是扯得非常谨小慎微。可现在最使朱丽娅生气的，则是爱思达所选择的这种出走的方式，竟将父母。弟弟和她自己全给抛弃了。她干吗要这样出走，干出这种事来，害得父母这样忧心如焚。这有多可怕呀! 屋子里一片凄惶的气氛。 父母在小房间谈话的时候，克莱德也在暗自寻思，因为现在他正在急切地探索思考人生问题。爱思达干的，到底是怎么回事? 难道说这就是骇人听闻的私奔那类事，或者是两性之间不堪入耳的那类事，正如大街上和学校里男孩子他们时常窃窃私语的? 他一想到这里，就不寒而栗。要是真的这样，该有多丢脸! 说不定她再也不会回来了。她跟一个不知是什么样儿的男人一起逃走了。反正这种行为，对一个女孩子来说，当然是要不得的。过去他常常听人说过，凡是男孩子和女孩子。男人和女人之间，一建立了堂堂正正的关系，最后导致的结果只有一个……结婚。他们这一家人本来就有其他的种种苦恼，可是现在，爱思达居然还干出私奔这种丑事来，真可以说祸不单行。他们这一家人的生活，本来就够惨的，如今又出了这件事，当然，只会变得更惨了。 不一会儿，父母从小房间走出来了。格里菲思太太依旧绷着脸，怪不自然的，可是毕竟有些变了，也许是脾气收敛一些，无可奈何地听天由命了。 "爱思达觉得最好还是离开我们，反正是暂时的，"她看见孩子们都在好奇地等着，开头只说了这些话。"现在，你们压根儿不用替她担心，再也用不着净想这件事啦。我相信，过一阵子她准回来的。她决定按自己的意愿干一阵子，反正总有什么原因呗。但愿是主的旨意就好啦! "("主啊我们赞美你的名字! "阿萨马上插嘴说。)"过去我还以为她同我们在一块很幸福，可现在看来，她并不觉得是这样。依我看，她应该自个儿去见一见世面才好。 "(阿萨又一迭连声发出"Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! ")"不过话又说回来，我们可不能把她想得太糟糕了。这对现在来说是没有什么好处……只有爱和仁慈才能正确指引我们。"不过她说这句话时，声调有些严峻，不知怎的是违心之言吧……她说话的声音照原样还是倒吸气音。"我们只能希望她很快就明白她这种举动该有多么傻。多么轻率，于是回家转。现在她走的那条路，别指望她会得到幸福的。这既不是主指引的路，也不是主的旨意。她太年轻了，她做了错事。不过，我们可以宽恕她的。我们一定要宽恕她才对。我们的心必须向她敞开，充满温情和慈爱。"她说这些话时，仿佛是向会众说的，不过，她的脸色和声调却是严厉。阴郁。冷峻的。"得了，你们都去睡吧。现在我们只能每天早上。中午。晚上虔心祷祝，但愿她不要遇到什么灾祸。是的，我真的巴不得她没有干这件事就好了，"最后，她添了这么一句话，显然跟她刚才说的这篇话不大协调。说真的，这时候她并没有想到孩子们还在她跟前……她是一心只惦着爱思达啊! 可是阿萨呢! 如此窝囊的一位父亲……这就是克莱德后来常常想到的看法。 除了他自己的痛苦以外，看来他唯一关注的，就是他的妻子更加深沉的痛苦。他自始至终只是傻呼呼地伫立在一边……矮矮的个儿，白花花的鬈发，露出一副窝囊相。 "是的，主啊，我们赞美你! "他不时插嘴说。"我们的心必须向她敞开。是的，我们可不能马上判断是非。我们只能往最好的一面想。是的! 是的! 赞美上帝……我们必须赞美上帝! 阿门! 哦，得了! Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! ""要是有人问起爱思达上哪儿去了，"格里菲思太太顿住了一会儿，接下去说，她睬也不睬她的丈夫，而是冲着向她围拢来的子女们说的，"我们就说: 她到托纳旺达看望我娘家的亲戚去了。当然罗，这不完全是实话，可是现在她究竟在哪儿，真相究竟又是怎样，我们也都不知道……反正说不定她会回来的。所以嘛，在我们还没有完全了解清楚以前，可千万不能说她的坏话，更不能做出任何伤害她的事来。""是啊，赞美上帝! "阿萨有气无力地应了一声。 "好吧，在我们还没了解清楚以前，要是有谁多咱问，就照我刚才说的回答，那就得了。""一定这样，"克莱德在旁帮衬着说;朱丽娅也跟上说了一句: "好吧。"格里菲思太太顿住了一会儿，脸上露出坚定而又内疚的神色，直瞅着孩子们。这时，阿萨又发出一迭连声"Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! "随后就把孩子们都打发睡觉去了。 说真的，克莱德很想知道爱思达信里说了些什么，不过，根据他长时间经验，他相信母亲决不会让他知道的(除非母亲愿意告诉他)，于是他又回到了自己房间，因为他觉得自己太疲乏了。要是还有一线希望找到她，他们为什么不再去找一下呢? 现在，就在此时此刻，她究竟在哪儿呢? 是在哪儿搭上了火车吗? 显然，她根本不乐意让人们找到她。也许她象他自己一样，感到不满吧。最近他暗自思忖，想要到什么地方去，同时心中纳闷，家里对这件事会有什么看法;可是如今他还在家里，爱思达她倒是先跑掉了。这件事对他将来的思想观点和行动，到底会有什么影响呢? 说真的，不管他的父母心里有多难过，可他始终看不出: 她这一走就是天大的灾祸……至少从"走"的观点来说，并不是这样。这只不过是一个事实，暗示这里家境每况愈下罢了。传教这种工作，根本毫无意义。 宗教热忱和传道这套玩意儿，也没有多大用处。它也挽救不了爱思达啊。显然，她象他本人一样，对这一套玩意儿也不是特别相信的。

Part 1 Chapter 4 The effect of this particular conclusion was to cause Clyde to think harder than ever about himself. And theprincipal result of his thinking was that he must do something for himself and soon. Up to this time the best hehad been able to do was to work at such odd jobs as befall all boys between their twelfth and fifteenth years: 　　assisting a man who had a paper route during the summer months of one year, working in the basement of a fiveand-ten-cent store all one summer long, and on Saturdays, for a period during the winter, opening boxes andunpacking goods, for which he received the munificent sum of five dollars a week, a sum which at the timeseemed almost a fortune. He felt himself rich and, in the face of the opposition of his parents, who were opposedto the theater and motion pictures also, as being not only worldly, but sinful, he could occasionally go to one oranother of those--in the gallery--a form of diversion which he had to conceal from his parents. Yet that did notdeter him. He felt that he had a right to go with his own money; also to take his younger brother Frank, who wasglad enough to go with him and say nothing. 　　Later in the same year, wishing to get out of school because he already felt himself very much belated in therace, he secured a place as an assistant to a soda water clerk in one of the cheaper drug stores of the city, whichadjoined a theater and enjoyed not a little patronage of this sort. A sign--"Boy Wanted"--since it was directly onhis way to school, first interested him. Later, in conversation with the young man whose assistant he was to be,and from whom he was to learn the trade, assuming that he was sufficiently willing and facile, he gathered that ifhe mastered this art, he might make as much as fifteen and even eighteen dollars a week. It was rumored thatStroud's at the corner of 14th and Baltimore streets paid that much to two of their clerks. The particular store towhich he was applying paid only twelve, the standard salary of most places. 　　But to acquire this art, as he was now informed, required time and the friendly help of an expert. If he wished tocome here and work for five to begin with--well, six, then, since his face fell--he might soon expect to know agreat deal about the art of mixing sweet drinks and decorating a large variety of ice creams with liquid sweets,thus turning them into sundaes. For the time being apprenticeship meant washing and polishing all the machineryand implements of this particular counter, to say nothing of opening and sweeping out the store at so early anhour as seven-thirty, dusting, and delivering such orders as the owner of this drug store chose to send out by him. 　　At such idle moments as his immediate superior--a Mr. Sieberling--twenty, dashing, self-confident, talkative,was too busy to fill all the orders, he might be called upon to mix such minor drinks--lemonades, Coca-Colas and the like-- as the trade demanded. 　　Yet this interesting position, after due consultation with his mother, he decided to take. For one thing, it wouldprovide him, as he suspected, with all the ice-cream sodas he desired, free--an advantage not to be disregarded. 　　In the next place, as he saw it at the time, it was an open door to a trade--something which he lacked. Further,and not at all disadvantageously as he saw it, this store required his presence at night as late as twelve o'clock,with certain hours off during the day to compensate for this. And this took him out of his home at night--out ofthe ten-o'clock-boy class at last. They could not ask him to attend any meetings save on Sunday, and not eventhen, since he was supposed to work Sunday afternoons and evenings. 　　Next, the clerk who manipulated this particular soda fountain, quite regularly received passes from the managerof the theater next door, and into the lobby of which one door to the drug store gave--a most fascinatingconnection to Clyde. It seemed so interesting to be working for a drug store thus intimately connected with atheater. 　　And best of all, as Clyde now found to his pleasure, and yet despair at times, the place was visited, just beforeand after the show on matinee days, by bevies of girls, single and en suite, who sat at the counter and giggled andchattered and gave their hair and their complexions last perfecting touches before the mirror. And Clyde, callowand inexperienced in the ways of the world, and those of the opposite sex, was never weary of observing thebeauty, the daring, the self-sufficiency and the sweetness of these, as he saw them. For the first time in his life,while he busied himself with washing glasses, filling the ice-cream and syrup containers, arranging the lemonsand oranges in the trays, he had an almost uninterrupted opportunity of studying these girls at close range. Thewonder of them! For the most part, they were so well-dressed and smart-looking--the rings, pins, furs, delightfulhats, pretty shoes they wore. And so often he overheard them discussing such interesting things--parties, dances,dinners, the shows they had seen, the places in or near Kansas City to which they were soon going, the differencebetween the styles of this year and last, the fascination of certain actors and actresses--principally actors--whowere now playing or soon coming to the city. And to this day, in his own home he had heard nothing of all this. 　　And very often one or another of these young beauties was accompanied by some male in evening suit, dressshirt, high hat, bow tie, white kid gloves and patent leather shoes, a costume which at that time Clyde felt to bethe last word in all true distinction, beauty, gallantry and bliss. To be able to wear such a suit with such ease andair! To be able to talk to a girl after the manner and with the sang-froid of some of these gallants! what a truemeasure of achievement! No good-looking girl, as it then appeared to him, would have anything to do with himif he did not possess this standard of equipment. It was plainly necessary--the thing. And once he did attain it-wasable to wear such clothes as these--well, then was he not well set upon the path that leads to all the blisses? 　　All the joys of life would then most certainly be spread before him. The friendly smiles! The secret handclasps,maybe--an arm about the waist of some one or another--a kiss--a promise of marriage--and then, and then! 　　And all this as a revealing flash after all the years of walking through the streets with his father and mother topublic prayer meeting, the sitting in chapel and listening to queer and nondescript individuals--depressing anddisconcerting people--telling how Christ had saved them and what God had done for them. You bet he wouldget out of that now. He would work and save his money and be somebody. Decidedly this simple and yet idylliccompound of the commonplace had all the luster and wonder of a spiritual transfiguration, the true mirage of thelost and thirsting and seeking victim of the desert. 　　However, the trouble with this particular position, as time speedily proved, was that much as it might teach himof mixing drinks and how to eventually earn twelve dollars a week, it was no immediate solvent for theyearnings and ambitions that were already gnawing at his vitals. For Albert Sieberling, his immediate superior,was determined to keep as much of his knowledge, as well as the most pleasant parts of the tasks, to himself. 　　And further he was quite at one with the druggist for whom they worked in thinking that Clyde, in addition toassisting him about the fountain, should run such errands as the druggist desired, which kept Clyde industriouslyemployed for nearly all the hours he was on duty. 　　Consequently there was no immediate result to all this. Clyde could see no way to dressing better than he did. 　　Worse, he was haunted by the fact that he had very little money and very few contacts and connections--so fewthat, outside his own home, he was lonely and not so very much less than lonely there. The flight of Esta hadthrown a chill over the religious work there, and because, as yet, she had not returned--the family, as he nowheard, was thinking of breaking up here and moving, for want of a better idea, to Denver, Colorado. But Clyde,by now, was convinced that he did not wish to accompany them. What was the good of it, he asked himself? 　　There would be just another mission there, the same as this one. 　　He had always lived at home--in the rooms at the rear of the mission in Bickel Street, but he hated it. And sincehis eleventh year, during all of which time his family had been residing in Kansas City, he had been ashamed tobring boy friends to or near it. For that reason he had always avoided boy friends, and had walked and playedvery much alone--or with his brother and sisters. 　　But now that he was sixteen and old enough to make his own way, he ought to be getting out of this. And yet hewas earning almost nothing--not enough to live on, if he were alone--and he had not as yet developed sufficientskill or courage to get anything better. 　　Nevertheless when his parents began to talk of moving to Denver, and suggested that he might secure work outthere, never assuming for a moment that he would not want to go he began to throw out hints to the effect that itmight he better if he did not. He liked Kansas City. What was the use of changing? He had a job now and hemight get something better. But his parents, bethinking themselves of Esta and the fate that had overtaken her,were not a little dubious as to the outcome of such early adventuring on his part alone. Once they were away,where would he live? With whom? What sort of influence would enter his life, who would be at hand to aid andcouncil and guide him in the straight and narrow path, as they had done? It was something to think about. 　　But spurred by this imminence of Denver, which now daily seemed to be drawing nearer, and the fact that notlong after this Mr. Sieberling, owing to his too obvious gallantries in connection with the fair sex, lost his placein the drug store, and Clyde came by a new and bony and chill superior who did not seem to want him as anassistant, he decided to quit--not at once, but rather to see, on such errands as took him out of the store, if hecould not find something else. Incidentally in so doing, looking here and there, he one day thought he wouldspeak to the manager of the fountain which was connected with the leading drug store in the principal hotel ofthe city--the latter a great twelve-story affair, which represented, as he saw it, the quintessence of luxury andease. Its windows were always so heavily curtained; the main entrance (he had never ventured to look beyondthat) was a splendiferous combination of a glass and iron awning, coupled with a marble corridor lined withpalms. Often he had passed here, wondering with boyish curiosity what the nature of the life of such a place might be. Before its doors, so many taxis and automobiles were always in waiting. 　　To-day, being driven by the necessity of doing something for himself, he entered the drug store which occupiedthe principal corner, facing 14th Street at Baltimore, and finding a girl cashier in a small glass cage near the door,asked of her who was in charge of the soda fountain. Interested by his tentative and uncertain manner, as well ashis deep and rather appealing eyes, and instinctively judging that he was looking for something to do, sheobserved: "Why, Mr. Secor, there, the manager of the store." She nodded in the direction of a short, meticulouslydressed man of about thirty-five, who was arranging an especial display of toilet novelties on the top of a glasscase. Clyde approached him, and being still very dubious as to how one went about getting anything in life, andfinding him engrossed in what he was doing, stood first on one foot and then on the other, until at last, sensingsome one was hovering about for something, the man turned: "Well?" he queried. 　　"You don't happen to need a soda fountain helper, do you?" Clyde cast at him a glance that said as plain asanything could, "If you have any such place, I wish you would please give it to me. I need it.""No, no, no," replied this individual, who was blond and vigorous and by nature a little irritable and contentious. 　　He was about to turn away, but seeing a flicker of disappointment and depression pass over Clyde's face, heturned and added, "Ever work in a place like this before?""No place as fine as this. No, sir," replied Clyde, rather fancifully moved by all that was about him. "I'm workingnow down at Mr. Klinkle's store at 7th and Brooklyn, but it isn't anything like this one and I'd like to getsomething better if I could.""Uh," went on his interviewer, rather pleased by the innocent tribute to the superiority of his store. "Well, that'sreasonable enough. But there isn't anything here right now that I could offer you. We don't make many changes. 　　But if you'd like to be a bell-boy, I can tell you where you might get a place. They're looking for an extra boy inthe hotel inside there right now. The captain of the boys was telling me he was in need of one. I should think thatwould be as good as helping about a soda fountain, any day."Then seeing Clyde's face suddenly brighten, he added: "But you mustn't say that I sent you, because I don't knowyou. Just ask for Mr. Squires inside there, under the stairs, and he can tell you all about it."At the mere mention of work in connection with so imposing an institution as the Green-Davidson, and thepossibility of his getting it, Clyde first stared, felt himself tremble the least bit with excitement, then thanking hisadvisor for his kindness, went direct to a green-marbled doorway which opened from the rear of this drug-storeinto the lobby of the hotel. Once through it, he beheld a lobby, the like of which, for all his years but because ofthe timorous poverty that had restrained him from exploring such a world, was more arresting, quite, thananything he had seen before. It was all so lavish. Under his feet was a checkered black-and-white marble floor. 　　Above him a coppered and stained and gilded ceiling. And supporting this, a veritable forest of black marblecolumns as highly polished as the floor--glassy smooth. And between the columns which ranged away towardthree separate entrances, one right, one left and one directly forward toward Dalrymple Avenue--were lamps,statuary, rugs, palms, chairs, divans, tete-a-tetes--a prodigal display. In short it was compact, of all that gaucheluxury of appointment which, as some one once sarcastically remarked, was intended to supply "exclusiveness tothe masses." Indeed, for an essential hotel in a great and successful American commercial city, it was almost too luxurious. Its rooms and hall and lobbies and restaurants were entirely too richly furnished, without the savinggrace of either simplicity or necessity. 　　As Clyde stood, gazing about the lobby, he saw a large company of people--some women and children, butprincipally men as he could see--either walking or standing about and talking or idling in the chairs, side by sideor alone. And in heavily draped and richly furnished alcoves where were writing-tables, newspaper files, atelegraph office, a haberdasher's shop, and a florist's stand, were other groups. There was a convention of dentistsin the city, not a few of whom, with their wives and children, were gathered here; but to Clyde, who was notaware of this nor of the methods and meanings of conventions, this was the ordinary, everyday appearance ofthis hotel. 　　He gazed about in awe and amazement, then remembering the name of Squires, he began to look for him in hisoffice "under the stairs." To his right was a grand double-winged black-and-white staircase which swung in twoseparate flights and with wide, generous curves from the main floor to the one above. And between these greatflights was evidently the office of the hotel, for there were many clerks there. But behind the nearest flight, andclose to the wall through which he had come, was a tall desk, at which stood a young man of about his own agein a maroon uniform bright with many brass buttons. And on his head was a small, round, pill-box cap, whichwas cocked jauntily over one ear. He was busy making entries with a lead pencil in a book which lay open beforehim. Various other boys about his own age, and uniformed as he was, were seated upon a long bench near him,or were to be seen darting here and there, sometimes, returning to this one with a slip of paper or a key or note ofsome kind, and then seating themselves upon the bench to await another call apparently, which seemed to comeswiftly enough. A telephone upon the small desk at which stood the uniformed youth was almost constantlybuzzing, and after ascertaining what was wanted, this youth struck a small bell before him, or called "front," towhich the first boy on the bench, responded. Once called, they went hurrying up one or the other stairs or towardone of the several entrances or elevators, and almost invariably were to be seen escorting individuals whose bagsand suitcases and overcoats and golf sticks they carried. There were others who disappeared and returned,carrying drinks on trays or some package or other, which they were taking to one of the rooms above. Plainlythis was the work that he should be called upon to do, assuming that he would be so fortunate as to connecthimself with such an institution as this. 　　And it was all so brisk and enlivening that he wished that he might be so fortunate as to secure a position here. 　　But would he be? And where was Mr. Squires? He approached the youth at the small desk: "Do you know whereI will find Mr. Squires?" he asked. 　　"Here he comes now," replied the youth, looking up and examining Clyde with keen, gray eyes. 　　Clyde gazed in the direction indicated, and saw approaching a brisk and dapper and decidedly sophisticated-looking person of perhaps twenty-nine or thirty years of age. He was so very slender, keen, hatchet-faced andwell-dressed that Clyde was not only impressed but overawed at once--a very shrewd and cunning-lookingperson. His nose was so long and thin, his eyes so sharp, his lips thin, and chin pointed. 　　"Did you see that tall, gray-haired man with the Scotch plaid shawl who went through here just now?" he pausedto say to his assistant at the desk. The assistant nodded. "Well, they tell me that's the Earl of Landreil. He just came in this morning with fourteen trunks and four servants. Can you beat it! He's somebody in Scotland. Thatisn't the name he travels under, though, I hear. He's registered as Mr. Blunt. Can you beat that English stuff? 　　They can certainly lay on the class, eh?""You said it!" replied his assistant deferentially. 　　He turned for the first time, glimpsing Clyde, but paying no attention to him. His assistant came to Clyde's aid. 　　"That young fella there is waiting to see you," he explained. 　　"You want to see me?" queried the captain of the bellhops, turning to Clyde, and observing his none-too-goodclothes, at the same time making a comprehensive study of him. 　　"The gentleman in the drug store," began Clyde, who did not quite like the looks of the man before him, but wasdetermined to present himself as agreeably as possible, "was saying--that is, he said that I might ask you if therewas any chance here for me as a bell-boy. I'm working now at Klinkle's drug store at 7th and Brooklyn, as ahelper, but I'd like to get out of that and he said you might--that is--he thought you had a place open now."Clyde was so flustered and disturbed by the cool, examining eyes of the man before him that he could scarcelyget his breath properly, and swallowed hard. 　　For the first time in his life, it occurred to him that if he wanted to get on he ought to insinuate himself into thegood graces of people--do or say something that would make them like him. So now he contrived an eager,ingratiating smile, which he bestowed on Mr. Squires, and added: "If you'd like to give me a chance, I'd try veryhard and I'd be very willing."The man before him merely looked at him coldly, but being the soul of craft and self-acquisitiveness in a pettyway, and rather liking anybody who had the skill and the will to be diplomatic, he now put aside an impulse toshake his head negatively, and observed: "But you haven't had any training in this work.""No, sir, but couldn't I pick it up pretty quick if I tried hard?""Well, let me see," observed the head of the bell-hops, scratching his head dubiously. "I haven't any time to talkto you now. Come around Monday afternoon. I'll see you then." He turned on his heel and walked away. 　　Clyde, left alone in this fashion, and not knowing just what it meant, stared, wondering. Was it really true that hehad been invited to come back on Monday? Could it be possible that--He turned and hurried out, thrilling fromhead to toe. The idea! He had asked this man for a place in the very finest hotel in Kansas City and he had askedhim to come back and see him on Monday. Gee! what would that mean? Could it be possible that he would beadmitted to such a grand world as this--and that so speedily? Could it really be?       克莱德由于作出了上面这个结论，比过去更加棘手地来考虑自己的前途问题。他考虑后的主要结果就是: 他必须给自己出出点子，而且还得越快越好。截至目前为止，他能找到的工作，充其量只是十二到十五岁的男孩子们有时干的一些零活: 每年夏天这几个月里，帮着包送报纸的人派报;整整一个夏季，在小杂货铺地下室里干活;入冬后有过一阵子，每逢星期六，开箱拆包，搬弄商品;就这样，他每个星期可挣到优厚的报酬……五块美元，那时在他看来，这一数目几乎好象是偌大的一宗财产了。他觉得自己有钱了，也就不时去看戏。看电影，坐在票价低廉的剧院最高楼座，根本不管父母的反对(在他们看来，戏和电影不仅是尘世俗物，而且邪恶透顶)，所以，象这样的一种娱乐消遣的方式，他也非得瞒过他们不可。不过，那也阻止不了他。他觉得，这钱是他自己的，他爱怎么花就怎么花，甚至还把小弟弟弗兰克一块儿带去。弗兰克自然乐滋滋跟着他去，而且始终闭口不说。 同年晚些时候，他想退学，因为他早就觉得自己上学太迟，总是赶不上去。 于是，他就在本市一家专售廉价品的小杂货店里觅到一个工作，给卖汽水的店员当助手。这家小杂货店正好毗邻剧院，因而叨光不少。这里是克莱德上学必经之地，因此，挂在那里的一块"招收学徒"的广告牌子，首先引起了他的注意。 后来，克莱德跟那个后来在其手下学生意的年轻人谈了一谈，假装自己不仅十分愿意，而且办事也很能干。他从这次谈话中获悉: 如果说这套本领他学到了家，包管挣大钱，每星期可挣十五块美元，最多甚至高达十八块美元。据说第十四街和巴尔的摩大街的交岔路口的斯特劳德铺子里，有两个伙计就挣这么多的钱。 他上门应聘的那一家商号，只肯给十二块美元，也就是绝大多数店铺的标准薪资。 可是人家当即告诉他: 要学好这一套本领，是需要一定时间，还要得到行家热心点拨才成。他要是乐意上这儿干活，开头就算每星期给五块美元……这时克莱德听后脸一沉……得了吧，干脆就给六块美元。说不定他很快就学会这套本领，能调制各种美味的饮料，并在各式各样的冰淇淋里添上果汁。甜食等等，做成圣代(圣代(译音)，盛在杯里的加水果蜜汁或其他佐料的冰淇淋。)。当学徒嘛，一开头不外乎是洗涤杯盘，把饮料柜台所有的机器设备和工具拭擦干净;更不必说，每天清晨七点半，打开店门，打扫店堂，掸去尘土，还有小杂货铺老板派给他的送货差使。有的时候，他手里没有活儿，而他的顶头上司……一位名叫西伯龄先生的，是个充满自信。闲话又多的年方二十的时髦小青年……生意太忙，实在照顾不了，因此，调制那些一般性的饮料……柠檬水。可口可乐等等，根据营业需要，也就会叫克莱德代劳了。 于是，克莱德跟母亲商量以后，决定把这个有趣的职司接下来。首先，据他暗自估摸，在那里冰淇淋有的是，他想吃多少，就有多少，不必自己掏钱……是一大优点，不容忽视。其次，那时他已经看出，反正这是进门学生意。学本领的第一步……做生意这一套本领，也正是他所短缺的。再说还有一点，在他看来，也不见得对他完全不利的，那就是: 这个铺子里要他一直上班到深夜十二点钟，而白天可以补上几小时作为调休。这么一来，晚上他就不在家……晚上十点钟那个夜班，他终于可以不参加了。除了星期日，他们再也不会叫他一块儿做礼拜去了;甚至星期天也不行，因为听说他星期天下午和晚上也得照常上班去。 再说，这个专管冷饮柜台的店员，经常收到隔壁剧院经理送来的免费入场券。加上小杂货铺有一道边门，与剧院的大厅相通……这种关系，对克莱德来说，真是太富有吸引力了。能在一个与剧院关系如此密切的小杂货铺里忙活，看来是满有意思的。 此外，还有最大的一个优点，使克莱德既高兴，但有时也会失望的，那就是: 赶上演日场的那些日子里，不论开场前和散场后，照例有一群群的年轻姑娘们上这儿来，有独个儿的，也有几个人在一起的，她们坐在柜台跟前，吃吃地笑着闲聊天，有时还对着镜子拢一拢头发，再涂上一点脂粉，描一下黛眉。克莱德虽说是个乳臭未干。涉世不深和不谙异性的毛头小伙子，可是一见到这些年轻姑娘，对她们的姿色，以及她们的泼辣。自负。可爱的模样儿，总是百看不厌的。这可以说是他生平头一遭，一面忙着擦洗杯子，灌满盛放冰淇淋和糖浆的容器，将一杯杯柠檬水和桔子水摆进托盘里，一面几乎不断地有机会从近处仔细端详着这些年轻姑娘们。她们……简直令人不可思议! 她们多半穿得都很漂亮，外貌也很标致，戴着戒指。别针和好看的帽子，披着名裘大衣，脚蹬精美的皮鞋。他还常常偷听到她们正在闲扯的那些有趣的事儿……比方说，茶会啦。舞会啦。宴会啦。她们刚看过的演出啦，还有她们打算不久就去玩儿的地方，有在堪萨斯城里，也有本城近郊，今年和去年的时装款式到底有哪些不同，正在本市演出或者即将来到本市演出的某些男女演员……主要是男演员……的迷人的魅力。直至今日，这些事情……他在自己家里都是从来没有听到过的。 这些年轻的美人儿里，还有不是这一位，就是那一位，时常由某个男士陪伴着，这种男士身穿晚礼服和与之配套的衬衫，头戴高筒礼帽，系上蝴蝶结领饰，手上是白羊皮手套，脚下则是漆皮鞋……这种装束打扮，在当时克莱德心目中，真是最高贵。最漂亮。最豪放。最有福祉也没有了。要是能那么雍容大方地穿上这样衣装服饰，该有多好! 要是能象这么一个时髦小伙子一样，跟一个年轻姑娘喁喁私语，该有多好! 那真可以说是到了至臻至美的境界啊。那时候，他觉得，只要他连这样的行头打扮都还没有，那末，哪一个漂亮姑娘也不会瞅他一眼的。显而易见，这些东西是非备不可的。只要他一旦有了这些东西……能有这样穿戴打扮……嘿，难道说他不就是稳稳当当地踏上了通往幸福之路吗? 人世间的一切欢乐，不消说，赫然展现在他面前。亲昵的微笑! 还有偷偷地握手，也许……一只手臂搂住某个年轻姑娘的腰肢……亲吻……婚约……以后，以后……! 这一切就象在漫长岁月之后突然射来的一道天启的灵光。在这些漫长岁月里，他一向跟着父母穿街走巷，当众传道，露天祈祷，或是坐在小教堂里，净听那些稀奇古怪。莫可形状的人……都是令人泄气和惊惶不安的人……说: 基督怎样拯救了他们，上帝又是怎样帮助了他们。现在，他肯定要从这一层次中脱身出来。他要好好干活，把钱积攒下来，做一个了不起的人。这一套简单而美妙的老生常谈，无疑地具有神灵变形(参见《圣经。新约。马太福音》第十七章: "耶稣……就在他们面前变了形象，脸面明亮如日头，衣裳洁白如光。")的一切光彩和奇迹，这好象在沙漠迷途。渴求活路的倒楣鬼面前，突然呈现海市蜃楼一样。 可是，过不了多久，克莱德很快就相信，他在这种特殊的岗位上也有一种苦恼，那就是说: 他在这里虽然可以学会调制饮料等许多东西，每个星期准能挣到十二块美元，可是那一直使他五内俱焚的渴望和虚荣心，却不是马上就能如愿以偿的。原因是: 顶头上司亚尔培特。西伯龄已下了决心，务必使他的窍门尽量不外传，同时，最轻松省力的工作，又给他自己留着。而且，他跟小杂货铺老板还有一致看法，就是认为: 克莱德除了帮他照料一下冷饮柜台以外，还应该听从老板吩咐，去干诸如跑腿之类杂活。这么一来，克莱德在他几乎整个工作日里，便忙得不可开交了。 一句话，克莱德不能从这一工作马上得到什么好处。他依然没法使自己比过去穿戴得更好些。最糟糕的是，有一件事总是在他心里萦绕不去: 原来他挣的钱少得很，各种应酬交际也少得很……几乎少到这样程度，就是说，他一离开了家，就感到非常寂寞，而且也不见得比在家里寂寞少一些。爱思达的出走，好象给父母的传道工作泼了凉水;又因为她至今还没有回来……他听说，家里由于想不出更好的办法，正在考虑从这里撤走，迁往科罗拉多州的丹佛。可是此时此刻，克莱德已有打算，决不跟他们一块儿走。他反问自己: 这可有什么好处呢? 到了那儿，也不外乎又一套传道的玩意儿，跟此地还不是一模一样? 克莱德一向住在家里……也就是在比克尔街传道馆后面的那个房子里，不过那个地方他可恨透了。打从十一岁起，他家一直在堪萨斯城，可他始终不愿把他的那些小朋友带到他家里，或是他家附近的地方。为了这个缘故，他总是回避那些小朋友;不论走路也好，玩儿也好，总是孤零零一个人……或者跟弟弟和姐妹他们在一起。 可是转眼之间，他已有十六岁了，完全可以独自谋生，应该跳出这种生活圈子了。只是至今他挣到的钱可以说寥寥无几……还不够他一个人过活呢……何况现在他自己还没有一手本事或者勇气，所以也找不到更好的事由。 不过，后来父母开始谈到迁居丹佛的时候，说过也许他在那里能找到工作，但是没承望他会不愿意去的。他向他们暗示说: 他还是不去的好。他喜欢堪萨斯城。换个城市有什么好处呢? 如今他有了工作，说不定将来会找到更好的机遇。 不过，他的父母一回想起爱思达和她的遭际，对于他这么年纪轻轻就独自一人去闯天下，将来会有什么结果，不免产生怀疑。要是他们都走了，他会住到哪里去呢? 跟谁住在一起呢? 他的生活会受到什么影响，有谁能象父母那样，经常挨在他身边，帮助他，点拨他，引导他沿着那条正道前进呢? 所有这一切，都是值得考虑的。 不过，现在举家迁往丹佛的日子，似乎一天比一天逼近了，对他来说，显得尤为紧迫了。偏巧这时候，那位西伯龄先生由于常常向女性大献殷勤，过于露骨，没有多久就被老板开革了。于是，小杂货铺里来了一个瘦骨嶙峋。冷若冰霜的新上司，不打算要克莱德当他助手。因此，克莱德就决定离开……不过不是马上就走，而是倒要利用跑外勤的机会，看看自己能不能找到别的事由。 有一天，他正在东张西望，设法另谋出路的当儿，忽然想到何不到本市的一家大酒店所管辖的那个首屈一指的大杂货店附设冷饮部去，干脆找那里经理谈一谈。那家大酒店是一幢十二层楼的大厦，在他看来，这就是……奢靡。舒适最完美的样板。它的窗户总是垂挂着厚厚的窗帘;大门口(过去他从来不敢朝门里东张西望)有一顶由十分华丽的玻璃和铁架制成的天篷。还有一道大理石砌成的走廊，两旁都是棕榈树。平时他常常走过那家大酒店，怀着孩子般的好奇心，暗自纳闷，不知道这么一个地方，里面的生活究竟是什么样儿。在那大门口，一天到晚总有那么多的出租汽车和私人汽车停在那儿。 今天，他因为要给自己另觅高枝，迫不得已，这才闯进了那家杂货店。该店坐落在巴尔的摩大街。面向第十四街。地段极佳的拐角处。他看见靠近门口的一座小玻璃亭子里有一个女出纳员，就去问她这里卖汽水的柜台是由谁负责。 他那试探和游移不定的神态，以及他那双深沉的。仿佛在恳求人的眼睛，一下子使她发生了兴趣，随即直觉地揣摸他正在找事由，于是，这个女出纳员便说: "哦! 西科尔先生，在那儿，他是本店经理。"她朝一个三十五岁上下。个儿矮矮的。 但是穿着很讲究的男人那边点点头。此人正在一只玻璃柜顶上别出心裁地布置新颖化妆品。克莱德走到他身边，心里还在迟疑不定，真不知道人家找事由该怎样启口的，同时又看到此人正在埋头干自己的活儿，所以只好先站在一边，两只脚替换站着。后来，那位经理觉得好象有人不知怎的老是在他身边转悠，这才侧过身来，问: "有什么事吗? ""请问贵处柜台上要不要添一个卖汽水的助手? "克莱德向他投去了一个眼色，让自己的迫切心情显露得再清楚也没有了。"要是有这样的职位，请您高抬贵手给了我吧。我正求之不得呢。""没有，没有，没有，"经理回答说。他这个人长着金黄色头发。碧澄的眼睛。 白净的肌肤，精力也很充沛，只是脾性有点儿火爆，喜欢跟人抬扛。他正要走了，可是看到克莱德脸上掠过一阵失望和沮丧的神色，就侧过身来，又问了一句: "从前在这种地方干过活吗? ""在这么漂亮的地方没有干过活。没有，先生，"克莱德回答说，不由得被他周围的景象所惊倒。"眼下我是在第七街和布鲁克林大街拐角处，克林克尔先生铺子里忙活，那儿跟贵处比，就算不上什么了。要是可能的话，我倒是很希望另找个好地方呢。""嗯，"对谈者听他这么天真地给自己的店铺捧场，心里相当高兴，就继续说，"哦，这倒是完全可以理解的。不过嘛，眼前我这儿没有什么事给你做。我们不是常常换人的。不过，你要是愿意在酒店里当侍应生，我倒可以指点你上哪儿去寻摸。里面的酒店正好要添一个侍应生。那儿的领班向我说过，他正需要找一个伙计。我想，这个好歹也抵得上在卖汽水的柜台上当助手吧。"此人一看克莱德突然喜形于色，就接下去说: "不过，你千万别说这是我叫你去的，因为我根本不认识你。你到了里头，只要去楼梯底下找斯夸尔斯先生，一切他会告诉你的。"克莱德一听，象格林－戴维逊这么气派宏伟的一家大酒店里，居然他还有可能得到工作的机会，先是目瞪口呆，继而兴奋得有点儿抖抖索索了。接着，他向这位好心人谢了一声，径直向这家杂货店后面通往酒店大厅(按我国宾馆用语，也可叫"大堂"。)的那条绿色大理石过道走去。他一进去，就见这么一个漂亮大厅，他一辈子都没见过;因为自己太穷，又加上胆小，从来不敢窥视一下这种美轮美奂的世界，所以不由得感到这里比他从前所见过的任何地方还要有趣。 四下里都是豪华极了。他脚底下踩的是黑白分明的小方格大理石铺砌的地面。 头上是镶铜。彩绘的鎏金天花板。许多黑色大理石柱子，望过去宛如一座树林子，一个个既象地面那么锃亮，又象玻璃一样光滑。这些大理石柱子一直延伸，通向三个出口处，一个在右边，一个在左边，一个径直对着达尔林普尔大街。 柱子中间有彩灯，有雕像，还有地毯。棕榈树。软椅和长沙发。面对面双人沙发，如此等等，不一而足。一句话，这里就是集一切粗俗的奢靡陈设的大成，正如有人挖苦地说过，旨在使"其孤高傲世推向大众"。其实，在一个繁华的美国大城市里，对一家顶呱呱的大酒店来说，这样的陈设也可以说是太奢侈了……不论客房和过道也好，还是大厅和餐厅也好，全都陈设得太富丽，反而没有简朴。实用的雅趣。 克莱德站在那里，凝神扫视了一下大厅，只见那里人群成堆……有些是女人和小孩，不过，他又细看一下，最多的还是男人……有的在走来走去，有的伫立着，也有的坐在椅子里聊天，或者闲着无事，还有的是两人成对，或则独自一人。一些挂着厚实的帷幔。陈设漂亮的小凹室里，有的摆上了写字台和报架，有一个是电报室，有一个是售货亭，还有一个是鲜花铺……那里也麇集着一群群人。本市牙科医生正在这里开代表大会，其中有不少人偕同妻子儿女也到格林－戴维逊酒店团聚。不过，克莱德既没有察觉到这一点，更不会懂得这些代表大会的开会方式及其重大意义，反正依他看，这家大酒店平日里都是这个样子的。 克莱德怀着敬畏和惊异的神情，直瞪着两眼，扫视了一下，然后想起了斯夸尔斯这个名字，这才到"楼梯底下"写字间去找他。克莱德右边有一座两侧黑白相间。分成两段的宽大楼梯，拐了个大弯，一直通往二楼。在这两段楼梯之间，一望可知就是酒店办公室，因为里面有很多职员。不过，在最近的这段楼梯后面，紧挨他刚才擦身而过的那面墙，有一只高高的写字台，那里站着一个年纪跟他差不离的年轻人……此人身上穿了一件缀着许多黄铜钮扣的茶色制服，头上是一顶丸药盒子似的圆形小帽，贴住耳边歪戴着，显得很帅的样子。这会儿他正拿着铅笔，忙着往一本摊在面前的簿子上登记。此外还有几个同他年龄相仿的小伙子，穿着跟他同样的制服，有的坐在他身旁的一只长条凳上，也有的来来去去，有时候拿着一张纸片。一把钥匙，或是一张什么便条之类，跑回来交给了此人，然后坐到了长条凳上，显而易见在听候下一次吩咐，看样子，用不了多久就要轮到的。那个穿制服的年轻人站在一只小写字台后面，台上有一部电话机，几乎不断在嗡嗡响。他一听清楚来电要求，就按按他面前那只小铃，或者喊一声"上来一个"，于是，长条凳上坐着的头一个侍者马上应声往前走去。 这些侍者一听完吩咐，就急冲冲从这边或那边的楼梯上楼，或者直奔某一个出口处或是某一部电梯。整日价都看得见他们陪送客人，手里提着皮包和手提箱，或者拿着大衣和高尔夫球棒之类东西。还有一些侍者去了不一会儿就回来了，两手托着盛放饮料的盘子，或是拎着小包之类东西，正要送到楼上的某一个房间去。要是他运气好，能被这么一家大酒店录用，赶明儿差遣他去干的，显然，就是这一类活儿吧。 何况这里一切都是那么轻快活泼，生气勃勃，因此，他心里真巴不得自己走运，能在这里找到一个职位。不过，他果真能这样走运吗? 斯夸尔斯先生又在哪儿呢? 他走到小写字台旁那个年轻人跟前，开口问道: "请问您我该上哪儿，才找得到斯夸尔斯先生? ""这会儿他正好来了，"那个年轻人一面回答说，一面抬起头来，用他那双敏锐的灰眼睛打量着克莱德。 克莱德朝他指点的方向定神一看，见到一个约莫二十九岁，或三十岁的人正在走过来。此人矫健活泼，显然见过不少世面。他身材颀长，思路敏锐，面孔瘦削，衣服穿得齐齐整整，克莱德见了，对他不仅印象很深，而且马上感到畏缩……真是好一个精明鬼啊。他的鼻子又长又细，眼睛很尖锐，还有他的薄嘴唇，尖下巴。 "刚才打这儿走过的那个披着苏格兰格子呢围巾。花白头发的高个儿……你看见了没有? "他停下来就问写字台跟前那个助手。那个助手点点头。"得了，他们告诉我，说他就是兰德雷尔伯爵。他是今儿早上刚到，随身带着十四只大箱子和四个仆人。好气派! 原来他是苏格兰一个大人物。不过，我听人说，他出外旅行，是不用这个名字的。他在这儿登记的是布伦特先生。你看见过那种英国佬派头吗? 他们当然是顶呱呱，头一流，嗯? ""你说得对! "他的助手恭顺地回答说。 直到此刻，他才侧过身来，瞥了克莱德一眼，不过依然没有理睬他。倒是他的助手走过来，帮帮克莱德的忙。 "那个年轻小伙子，正在那儿，等着要见您呢，"那助手向他作了说明。 "是你要找我吗? "领班斯夸尔斯转过身来问克莱德，看了一下他那套蹩脚衣服，同时又把他上下仔细端详。 "是杂货店里那位先生对我说的，"克莱德开始说话了，其实，他不大喜欢他面前那个人的派头，不过，他一定要设法让对方尽可能对他留下好印象。"……这是说，他说我不妨问问您，我能不能在这儿找到一个当侍应生的机会。目前我在第七街和布鲁克林街拐角处的克林克尔先生开的那个杂货店里帮工，不过，我很想离开那儿。他说您也许可以……这就是说……他估摸着您这儿有个空缺，正要添人。"瞧克莱德面前这个人……那双冷冰冰的。一味琢磨他的眼睛，使他窘困极了，甚至连透气都透不过来，只好一个劲儿往喉咙里直咽口水。 他生平头一遭才想到: 如果想要成功，他就得阿谀奉承，博取人家的欢心……不外乎做一点什么事，说一些什么话，叫人家欢喜他呗。于是，他就对斯夸尔斯先生先是装出一心要讨好的笑脸，接下去说: "要是您乐意给我一个机会，我可一定使劲儿干，并且一定很听话。"克莱德面前这个人，只是冷冰冰地瞅了他一眼，不过，此人心里鬼主意不少，而且又会耍些小手腕，以便达到个人目的。谁圆滑灵活，善于跟人打交道，他就喜欢谁。所以，他本来打算摇摇头，一口回绝了，可现在他只是这么说: "不过，你对这种工作一点儿经验还没有吧。""是的，先生，不过，我只要拼命学，不是很快就学会了吗? ""哦，让我想一想，"那个侍者领班一面这样说，一面半信半疑地搔搔头。"这会儿我没有工夫跟你多谈。星期一下午，你再来一趟吧。到时候我可以见你。 "他说完一转身就走了。 克莱德就这样独自一人被甩在一边，闹不清这是什么意思，只好两眼直瞪着，心里暗自纳闷。此人是不是真的叫他星期一再来呢? 是不是有可能……他一转过身来，连忙往外走，浑身上下激动极了。事成了! 他要求这个人在堪萨斯城这家最漂亮的酒店里给他一个职位，对方居然叫他星期一再来找他。嘿! 这是什么意思? 难道说人们真的让他跻身于这么一个豪华世界……而且居然能一蹴而就? 真的会这样吗?

Part 1 Chapter 5 The imaginative flights of Clyde in connection with all this--his dreams of what it might mean for him to beconnected with so glorious an institution--can only be suggested. For his ideas of luxury were in the main soextreme and mistaken and gauche--mere wanderings of a repressed and unsatisfied fancy, which as yet had hadnothing but imaginings to feed it. 　　He went back to his old duties at the drug-store--to his home after hours in order to eat and sleep--but now forthe balance of this Friday and Saturday and Sunday and Monday until late in the day, he walked on air, really. 　　His mind was not on what he was doing, and several times his superior at the drugstore had to remind him to"wake-up." And after hours, instead of going directly home, he walked north to the corner of 14th and Baltimore,where stood this great hotel, and looked at it. There, at midnight even, before each of the three principalentrances--one facing each of three streets--was a doorman in a long maroon coat with many buttons and a high-rimmed and long-visored maroon cap. And inside, behind looped and fluted French silk curtains, were the stillblazing lights, the a la carte dining-room and the American grill in the basement near one corner still open. Andabout them were many taxis and cars. And there was music always--from somewhere. 　　After surveying it all this Friday night and again on Saturday and Sunday morning, he returned on Mondayafternoon at the suggestion of Mr. Squires and was greeted by that individual rather crustily, for by then he hadall but forgotten him. But seeing that at the moment he was actually in need of help, and being satisfied thatClyde might be of service, he led him into his small office under the stair, where, with a very superior mannerand much actual indifference, he proceeded to question him as to his parentage, where he lived, at what he hadworked before and where, what his father did for a living--a poser that for Clyde, for he was proud and soashamed to admit that his parents conducted a mission and preached on the streets. Instead he replied (which wastrue at times) that his father canvassed for a washing machine and wringer company--and on Sundays preached-areligious revelation, which was not at all displeasing to this master of boys who were inclined to be anythingbut home-loving and conservative. Could he bring a reference from where he now was? He could. 　　Mr. Squires proceeded to explain that this hotel was very strict. Too many boys, on account of the scenes and theshow here, the contact made with undue luxury to which they were not accustomed--though these were not thewords used by Mr. Squires--were inclined to lose their heads and go wrong. He was constantly being forced todischarge boys who, because they made a little extra money, didn't know how to conduct themselves. He musthave boys who were willing, civil, prompt, courteous to everybody. They must be clean and neat about theirpersons and clothes and show up promptly--on the dot--and in good condition for the work every day. And anyboy who got to thinking that because he made a little money he could flirt with anybody or talk back, or go offon parties at night, and then not show up on time or too tired to be quick and bright, needn't think that he wouldbe here long. He would be fired, and that promptly. He would not tolerate any nonsense. That must beunderstood now, once and for all. 　　Clyde nodded assent often and interpolated a few eager "yes, sirs" and "no, sirs," and assured him at the last thatit was the furtherest thing from his thoughts and temperament to dream of any such high crimes andmisdemeanors as he had outlined. Mr. Squires then proceeded to explain that this hotel only paid fifteen dollars amonth and board--at the servant's table in the basement--to any bell-boy at any time. But, and this informationcame as a most amazing revelation to Clyde, every guest for whom any of these boys did anything--carried a bagor delivered a pitcher of water or did anything--gave him a tip, and often quite a liberal one--a dime, fifteencents, a quarter, sometimes more. And these tips, as Mr. Squires explained, taken all together, averaged from four to six dollars a day--not less and sometimes more--most amazing pay, as Clyde now realized. His heart gavean enormous bound and was near to suffocating him at the mere mention of so large a sum. From four to sixdollars! Why, that was twenty-eight to forty-two dollars a week! He could scarcely believe it. And that inaddition to the fifteen dollars a month and board. And there was no charge, as Mr. Squires now explained, for thehandsome uniforms the boys wore. But it might not be worn or taken out of the place. His hours, as Mr. Squiresnow proceeded to explain, would be as follows: On Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays, he was towork from six in the morning until noon, and then, with six hours off, from six in the evening until midnight. OnTuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays, he need only work from noon until six, thus giving him each alternateafternoon or evening to himself. But all his meals were to be taken outside his working hours and he was toreport promptly in uniform for line-up and inspection by his superior exactly ten minutes before the regular hoursof his work began at each watch. 　　As for some other things which were in his mind at the time, Mr. Squires said nothing. There were others, as heknew, who would speak for him. Instead he went on to add, and then quite climactically for Clyde at that time,who had been sitting as one in a daze: "I suppose you are ready to go to work now, aren't you?""Yes, sir, yes, sir," he replied. 　　"Very good!" Then he got up and opened the door which had shut them in. "Oscar," he called to a boy seated atthe head of the bell-boy bench, to which a tallish, rather oversized youth in a tight, neat-looking uniformresponded with alacrity. "Take this young man here--Clyde Griffiths is your name, isn't it?--up to the wardrobeon the twelfth and see if Jacobs can find a suit to fit. But if he can't tell him to alter it by to-morrow. I think theone Silsbee wore ought to be about right for him."Then he turned to his assistant at the desk who was at the moment looking on. "I'm giving him a trial, anyhow,"he commented. "Have one of the boys coach him a little to-night or whenever he starts in. Go ahead, Oscar," hecalled to the boy in charge of Clyde. "He's green at this stuff, but I think he'll do," he added to his assistant, asClyde and Oscar disappeared in the direction of one of the elevators. Then he walked off to have Clyde's nameentered upon the payroll. 　　In the meantime, Clyde, in tow of this new mentor, was listening to a line of information such as neverpreviously had come to his ears anywhere. 　　"You needn't be frightened, if you ain't never worked at anything like dis before," began this youth, whose lastname was Hegglund as Clyde later learned, and who hailed from Jersey City, New Jersey, exotic lingo, gesturesand all. He was tall, vigorous, sandy-haired, freckled, genial and voluble. They had entered upon an elevatorlabeled "employees." "It ain't so hard. I got my first job in Buffalo t'ree years ago and I never knowed a t'ingabout it up to dat time. All you gotta do is to watch de udders an' see how dey do, see. Yu get dat, do you?"Clyde, whose education was not a little superior to that of his guide, commented quite sharply in his own mindon the use of such words as "knowed," and "gotta"--also upon "t'ing," "dat," "udders," and so on, but so gratefulwas he for any courtesy at this time that he was inclined to forgive his obviously kindly mentor anything for hisgeniality. 　　"Watch whoever's doin' anyt'ing, at first, see, till you git to know, see. Dat's de way. When de bell rings, if you'reat de head of de bench, it's your turn, see, an' you jump up and go quick. Dey like you to be quick around here,see. An' whenever you see any one come in de door or out of an elevator wit a bag, an' you're at de head of debench, you jump, wedder de captain rings de bell or calls 'front' or not. Sometimes he's busy or ain't lookin' an' hewants you to do dat, see. Look sharp, cause if you don't get no bags, you don't get no tips, see. Everybody dat hasa bag or anyt'ing has to have it carried for 'em, unless dey won't let you have it, see. 　　"But be sure and wait somewhere near de desk for whoever comes in until dey sign up for a room," he rattled onas they ascended in the elevator. "Most every one takes a room. Den de clerk'll give you de key an' after dat allyou gotta do is to carry up de bags to de room. Den all you gotta do is to turn on de lights in de batroom andcloset, if dere is one, so dey'll know where dey are, see. An' den raise de curtains in de day time or lower 'em atnight, an' see if dere's towels in de room, so you can tell de maid if dere ain't, and den if dey don't give you notip, you gotta go, only most times, unless you draw a stiff, all you gotta do is hang back a little--make a stall,see--fumble wit de door-key or try de transom, see. Den, if dey're any good, dey'll hand you a tip. If dey don't,you're out, dat's all, see. You can't even look as dough you was sore, dough--nottin' like dat, see. Den you comedown an' unless dey wants ice-water or somepin, you're troo, see. It's back to de bench, quick. Dere ain't much toit. Only you gotta be quick all de time, see, and not let any one get by you comin' or goin'--dat's de main t'ing. 　　"An' after dey give you your uniform, an' you go to work, don't forgit to give de captain a dollar after everywatch before you leave, see--two dollars on de day you has two watches, and a dollar on de day you has one,see? Dat's de way it is here. We work togedder like dat, an' you gotta do dat if you wanta hold your job. But dat'sall. After dat all de rest is yours."Clyde saw. 　　A part of his twenty-four or thirty-two dollars as he figured it was going glimmering, apparently--eleven ortwelve all told--but what of it! Would there not be twelve or fifteen or even more left? And there were his mealsand his uniform. Kind Heaven! What a realization of paradise! What a consummation of luxury! 　　Mr. Hegglund of Jersey City escorted him to the twelfth floor and into a room where they found on guard awizened and grizzled little old man of doubtful age and temperament, who forthwith ouffitted Clyde with a suitthat was so near a fit that, without further orders, it was not deemed necessary to alter it. And trying on variouscaps, there was one that fitted him--a thing that sat most rakishly over one ear--only, as Hegglund informed him,"You'll have to get dat hair of yours cut. Better get it clipped behind. It's too long." And with that Clyde himselfhad been in mental agreement before he spoke. His hair certainly did not look right in the new cap. He hated itnow. And going downstairs, and reporting to Mr. Whipple, Mr. Squires' assistant, the latter had said: "Very well. 　　It fits all right, does it? Well, then, you go on here at six. Report at five-thirty and be here in your uniform atfive-forty-five for inspection."Whereupon Clyde, being advised by Hegglund to go then and there to get his uniform and take it to the dressing-room in the basement, and get his locker from the locker-man, he did so, and then hurried most nervously out-firstto get a hair-cut and afterwards to report to his family on his great luck. 　　He was to be a bell-boy in the great Hotel Green-Davidson. He was to wear a uniform and a handsome one. He was to make--but he did not tell his mother at first what he was to make, truly--but more than eleven or twelve atfirst, anyhow, he guessed--he could not be sure. For now, all at once, he saw economic independence ahead forhimself, if not for his family, and he did not care to complicate it with any claims which a confession as to hisreal salary would most certainly inspire. But he did say that he was to have his meals free--because that meanteating away from home, which was what he wished. And in addition he was to live and move always in theglorious atmosphere of this hotel--not to have to go home ever before twelve, if he did not wish--to have goodclothes-- interesting company, maybe--a good time, gee! 　　And as he hurried on about his various errands now, it occurred to him as a final and shrewd and deliciousthought that he need not go home on such nights as he wished to go to a theater or anything like that. He couldjust stay down-town and say he had to work. And that with free meals and good clothes--think of that! 　　The mere thought of all this was so astonishing and entrancing that he could not bring himself to think of it toomuch. He must wait and see. He must wait and see just how much he would make here in this perfectlymarvelous-marvelous realm.       这一切使克莱德顿时胡思乱想起来……到这么了不起的地方干活，对个人前途会意味着什么……他在这方面的梦想，只好让人揣度去吧。他对于奢华的想法，基本上是那样极端。错误。粗俗……仅仅是一些痴心妄想，一种受压抑。 得不到满足。至今还只好悬想臆测。聊以自慰的白日梦呓罢了。 他回到杂货店，工作一切照常……下班后，他便回家吃晚饭，睡觉……可是如今，一到星期五。星期六。星期日和星期一下午，他就想入非非了。不论做什么事，他总是心不在焉;杂货店里他的上司有好几次都不得不提醒他，要他"醒一醒"。下班以后，他并不直接回家，而是往北走，到第十四街和巴尔的摩大街拐角处，仰望着那家大酒店……在那里，即使到了深更半夜，三个入口处(每个入口处正对着一条大街)都站着一个看门人;看门人身上穿着缀上很多钮扣。长长的茶色侍者制服，头上戴着帽檐高高。帽舌长长的茶色帽子。里面呢，就在有凹槽。缀圈环的法国绸窗帘后面，依然是灯火辉煌，附近地下室一隅那个点菜的餐厅和供应美国式烤肉的酒吧间，这时也还没有打烊。四周围有很多出租汽车和私人汽车，而且总有笙歌弦乐的声音……真不知道是从哪儿传来的。 他是在星期五晚和星期六。星期日早晨，一连好几次，仔细打量了这家酒店以后，星期一下午就按照斯夸尔斯先生的意思，又一次到这里来了，没承望此人对他十分粗鲁无礼，因为那时此人几乎把他忘得一干二净了。不过，考虑到他当时确实需要帮手，并且认为克莱德也许可以胜任，因此就把他带到楼梯底下他那个小办公室里，摆出一副顶头上司的派头和完全无动于衷的样子，开始盘问他的出身和住处，从前是在什么地方，做过什么事，他父亲又是指靠什么谋生的……这最后一个问题，叫克莱德感到特别发窘，因为他毕竟有自尊心，而且羞于承认自己父母开办传道馆，并在街头布道。于是，他便随机应变，回答说(有时这也是实情)，他父亲给一家洗衣机和绞衣机公司兜揽生意……赶上星期日布道……有关传教的事，干脆说开了，倒是一点儿也没有让这位领班产生不满，因为他根本不象是个眷恋家园，而又循规蹈矩的人。他问克莱德能不能从目前任职那家店里取得一份推荐书。克莱德回答说可以的。 斯夸尔斯先生接下去向他介绍本酒店店规很严格。过去有很多小伙子，由于欣赏这里的场面和气派，接触了原先不习惯的过分奢靡的生活……尽管斯夸尔斯先生并没有使用这些字眼……他们就冲昏了头脑，误入歧途。有些侍应生，挣了一点外快就不知自爱，他经常出于无奈，只好把他们辞退。他要的侍应生，必须是听话。懂规矩。手脚快。见了人都要彬彬有礼。他们必须经常保持仪表服饰整洁，每天准时上班……一分一秒也不能迟到……整天价都得精神抖擞，把工作做好。不拘是哪一个侍应生，只要自以为挣了一点钱，就可以跟人调情取乐，或是顶嘴抬杠，就是晚上外出赴舞会，结果第二天不能准时上班，或是精疲力竭，做起事来拖拖沓沓。懒懒散散，那他就别想在这里再待下去。这种人……我是要把他开除的，而且还得马上开除才行。斯夸尔斯先生决不容许胡来一气的。以上这些是必须在现在一开头，也可以说是最后一次地通通向你交待清楚了。 克莱德不断地点头，表示同意，并还不时急急乎地插进去几句"是的，先生"和"不会的，先生"。到最后，他还立下保证，说他根据自己思想秉性，是决不会出格的，干出斯夸尔斯先生方才所列举的种种恶行劣迹。随后，斯夸尔斯先生继续介绍本酒店店规，说侍应生每月只发工钱十五块美元，另外免费供膳……在地下室侍者专用的餐桌用膳。不过，无论哪一个侍应生，只要给客人做点什么事……比方说，拎一下皮包。送去一壶水，或是干了一点别的小差使……客人就会给他一点小费，而且往往给得很阔气……也许是十个美分的银币，也许是十五个或二十个美分，有时候还要多一些……这一消息对克莱德说来，真是最惊人的一大发现。据斯夸尔斯先生说，这些小费都合在一起，每天平均四到六块美元……不会比这再少，有时候还要多一些……克莱德心里有了谱: 这一笔进项，真是太惊人了。他一听说有这么大的数目，心儿一下子突突地跳，差一点连气都透不过来了。四到六块美元! 嘿! 这就是说，每个星期有二十八到四十二块美元呀! 他几乎不敢相信这是真的。何况每个月还有十五块美元薪资，免费供膳呢。斯夸尔斯先生介绍时说，侍应生穿的漂亮制服，是用不着自己掏钱的。 不过，这些制服既不能穿到外面去，也不准往外拿走。斯夸尔斯先生继续介绍，说他的工作时间是这样的: 星期一。星期三。星期五。星期日，从清晨六点干到中午为止，然后休息六个小时，再从傍晚六点一直干到半夜。星期二。星期四和星期六，他只要从中午干到下午六点，这样转天有一个下午或是一个晚上，就归他个人支配。不过，他一日进几次餐，一概都在工作时间以外。每班按照规定上班时间开始之前十分钟，克莱德就得穿好制服，准时前来站队，听候他的顶头上司检查。 当时斯夸尔斯先生心里还想到的一些别的事情，他却一字不提。他知道反正有别人会替他说的。于是，他接下去说: "我想，你现在就乐意上班，是不是? "本来克莱德一直仿佛有点头昏目眩似的坐在那儿，现在一听到他猛地问这句话，不免感到太突然了。 "是的，先生，是的，先生，"克莱德回答说。 "敢情好! "说罢，他就站了起来，打开他们进来时刚关上的那道门。"奥斯卡，"他向坐在长条凳头上那个侍应生招呼了一声，马上就有一名个儿相当高。稍微有些胖。身穿整洁的紧身制服的年轻人敏捷地应声而起。"把这个小伙子带去……你叫克莱德。格里菲思，是吧? ……领他到十二楼制服间去，你看，雅可布能不能给他找出一套合身的制服。如果找不到合身的，就让他明天来改一改。我说西尔斯比穿过的那一套，也许他穿差不离吧。"随后，他掉过头来，冲写字台前那个一直望着他们的助手说: "反正我得让他先试一试再说。"他又说: "今儿晚上叫一个伙计先教他一下，或是等到他上班时教他也行。去吧，奥斯卡，"他关照那个带领克莱德的侍者说。当克莱德和奥斯卡径直走向一部电梯。不见踪影的时候，他对他的助手找补着说: "他干这一行还是个新手，不过，我看他准对付得了。"随后，他就走过去，把克莱德的名字记入薪水册。 这时，克莱德在这位新的良师管教下，正洗耳恭听一大套他从来没有听到过的情况。 "你要是以前没有做过这种事，也用不着害怕，"这个年轻人一开头就这样说。 后来克莱德才知道，此人姓赫格伦，来自新泽西州泽西城，他说话时总有那种外地人的怪腔怪调，喜欢比划打手势等等，也都是从那里带来的。他身材高大，精力充沛，淡褐色头发，脸上长着雀斑，待人和气，口若悬河。他们走进了标着"职工专用"字样的电梯。"这玩意儿也没啥难。我头一次在布法罗做事，那是在三年以前，在拿〔那〕以前，我对这种希〔事〕也是嘛也不疼〔懂〕。你次药〔只要〕留点神看比个〔别个〕人，看看大们〔他们〕怎么做，就得了。拿〔那〕你的听明白了没有? "论教育程度，克莱德虽然比他的这位向导也高明不了多少，可是他一听见此人嘴里说什么"嘛也不疼"和"次药"……以及什么"希"。"拿"和"比个"诸如此类的词儿，心里不由得感到非常别扭。不过此时此刻，只要有人给他献上一点儿殷勤，他心里都会万分感激，何况眼前这位分明是好心肠的良师，态度又是如此和蔼可亲，所以，不管什么事，克莱德也都能原谅他了。 "不管谁做啥希〔事〕情，你先留神看着，你懂吗，直到你学会了才算数，你懂吗。拿〔那〕就是这么回希〔事〕。铃声一响，你正好坐在长条凳头上，那该是轮到你了，你懂吗，你马上就得一跃而起，赶快上去。这里大〔他〕们就是喜欢你动作快一些，你懂吗。不管啥时候，你一看见有人进门来了，或是拎着皮包从电梯里出来，偏巧你正坐在长条凳头上，你就赶快奔过去，不管领班按铃了没有，或是喊没喊' ''''上来一个，。有的时候他实在太忙了，或是照顾不了，他就要你主动去做，你懂吗。希希〔事事〕要留心，引〔因〕为你拿不到手提包，你就得不到小费，你懂吗。不管拿〔哪〕一个，带着皮包或是别的什么冬〔东〕西，我们都得赶过去给大〔他〕们拎着，除非大〔他〕们硬是不让你拎，你懂吗。 "不过，不管是拿〔哪〕个客人进来，你务必守在帐台旁边等着，一直到客人定好了房间，"他们坐电梯上楼的时候，克莱德这位良师还喋喋不休地念叨着。 "差不多每个客人都要定一个房间。在火〔随后〕，帐房先生就会给你一把钥匙，拿〔那〕末，你就次药〔只要〕把一些手提包送进房间得了。此外，你就次药〔只要〕把浴室和厕所里的灯一一打开(要是房间里有的话)，好让大〔他〕们知道它们在啥地方，你懂吗。赶上是白天，你就得把窗帘卷起来;晚上则把窗帘放下来，再要看看房间里有没有毛巾，没有的话，就要通知女侍者。这时候大〔他〕们要是还不赏给你小费，你就得走了，不过在大多数情况下，除非你遇到一个很吝啬的家伙，你次药〔只要〕再磨蹭一会儿……找个借口，你懂吗……摸弄一下开门的钥匙，或是试拉一下门上的气窗，你懂吗。在火〔随后〕，次药大〔只要他〕们心中有数了，就会给你小费。要是大〔他〕们还不给，拿〔那〕你就完蛋了，就是这样，你懂吗。你可千万别露出不开心的样子……不作兴那样，你懂吗。拿〔那〕时，你就下来，除非大〔他〕们说要冰水或是什么冬〔东〕西的，你的希〔事〕就算做完了，你懂吗。你再回到长条凳上去，要快。这玩意儿可一点儿不难做的。只是不管什么时候，你都得要快，你懂吗。客人有进来的，有出去的，千万不要错过一个……这才是最要紧的巧〔窍〕门儿。 "等到大〔他〕们发给你制服，你上班以后，可别王〔忘〕了每次下班临走前，给领班一块钱，你懂吗……一天你值两个班，就得给两块，次〔只〕值一个班，就给一块，你懂吗? 这就是本酒店的规矩。我们在这儿一快〔块〕做事，就药〔要〕象拿〔那〕样。你药〔要〕保住这只饭碗，就飞〔非〕得拿〔那〕样不可。不过总共也就花去那些。剩下来的，就全是你自个儿的了。 "克莱德明白了。 他暗自估摸一下: 他那二十四块或是三十二块美元里头，显然有一部分就不翼而飞了……总共是十一。二块美元……不过，这又算得了什么! 剩下来的，不是还有十二块到十五块美元，甚至还更多一些吗? 况且还有向他免费供给膳食和制服呢。好心肠的老天爷啊! 这简直是上了天国呀! 过去向往奢华生活，现在真的如愿以偿了! 来自泽西城的赫格伦陪着他到达十二层楼，走进一个房间，看见有个头发花白。皱皮疙瘩的小老头正在值班，简直看不出此人年龄有多大，脾气又是如何。他马上拿出一套相当合身的制服给了克莱德，要是没有其他吩咐，就可以不必再改了。克莱德一连试了好几顶帽子，有一顶他戴上挺合适……歪戴在一边耳侧，真是帅极了……只不过赫格伦照样关照他: "你得把拿〔那〕头发剪一剪。 最好后头剪掉一些。太长了。"其实在他还没有开口说这话以前，克莱德心中早就想到这一点了。戴上新帽子，他的那头长发当然不大合适。这时，他一下子讨厌他的那头长发了。随后，他便下楼，向斯夸尔斯先生的助手惠普尔先生报到。惠普尔先生说: "好极了。制服很合身，你说是吗? 那就得了，你上六点的班。 五点半报到，五点三刻穿好制服，以备检查。"临了，赫格伦关照他马上脱下制服，送到地下室公共更衣室，向看管的人领取一个小柜。克莱德一一照办了。随后，他心里激动到了极点，急冲冲走了出来……先去理了发，然后向全家报告这个偌大的喜讯。 赶明儿他要在格林－戴维逊大酒店当侍应生了。他将要穿上一身制服，而且是一身很漂亮的制服。他将要挣到多少钱……他开头并没有如实告知母亲……不过，据他心里估摸，开头反正总在十一。二块美元以上……现在他还说不准。因为他现在突然看到了自己马上就可以经济独立，尽管还无力赡养全家，但就自己一个人来说，好歹没问题了。他可不乐意使事情复杂化，因为他要是把薪资的实际数目和盘托出，家里当然就会向他要钱。不过，他倒是说过膳食不用自己掏钱……因为这就是说，往后他不在家吃饭了，而这对他来说乃是正中下怀的事。再说，将来他经常在这家酒店的豪华气氛中过日子……只要他乐意，也就根本不必一定要在半夜十二点以前赶回家去……还可以穿上好衣服……说不定会交上一些有趣的朋友……嘿嘿，那才是其乐融融啊! 当他东奔西走在干杂活的时候，他忽然心里涌上了又一个巧妙而又诱人的念头: 往后他只要乐意去剧院，或是上其他什么地方，晚上就用不着回家了。他可以待在闹市区，说他有事就得了。何况膳食不用自己掏钱，还可以穿上好衣服……想想，多美! 仅仅想到这些，就使他感到那样惊喜若狂，因此他连想都不敢多想了。他最好还得等着瞧。是的，他得等着瞧，就在这个无限美好的妙境里，他能得到的究竟有多少东西。

Part 1 Chapter 6 And as conditions stood, the extraordinary economic and social inexperience of the Griffiths--Asa and Elvira-dovetailedall too neatly with his dreams. For neither Asa nor Elvira had the least knowledge of the actualcharacter of the work upon which he was about to enter, scarcely any more than he did, or what it might mean tohim morally, imaginatively, financially, or in any other way. For neither of them had ever stopped in a hotelabove the fourth class in all their days. Neither one had ever eaten in a restaurant of a class that catered to otherthan individuals of their own low financial level. That there could be any other forms of work or contact thanthose involved in carrying the bags of guests to and from the door of a hotel to its office, and back again, for aboy of Clyde's years and temperament, never occurred to them. And it was naively assumed by both that the payfor such work must of necessity be very small anywhere, say five or six dollars a week, and so actually belowClyde's deserts and his years. 　　And in view of this, Mrs. Griffiths, who was more practical than her husband at all times, and who was intenselyinterested in Clyde's economic welfare, as well as that of her other children, was actually wondering why Clydeshould of a sudden become so enthusiastic about changing to this new situation, which, according to his ownstory, involved longer hours and not so very much more pay, if any. To be sure, he had already suggested that itmight lead to some superior position in the hotel, some clerkship or other, but he did not know when that wouldbe, and the other had promised rather definite fulfillment somewhat earlier--as to money, anyhow. 　　But seeing him rush in on Monday afternoon and announce that he had secured the place and that forthwith hemust change his tie and collar and get his hair cut and go back and report, she felt better about it. For neverbefore had she seen him so enthusiastic about anything, and it was something to have him more content withhimself--not so moody, as he was at times. 　　Yet, the hours which he began to maintain now--from six in the morning until midnight--with only an occasional early return on such evenings as he chose to come home when he was not working--and when he troubled toexplain that he had been let off a little early--together with a certain eager and restless manner--a desire to be outand away from his home at nearly all such moments as he was not in bed or dressing or undressing, puzzled hismother and Asa, also. The hotel! The hotel! He must always hurry off to the hotel, and all that he had to reportwas that he liked it ever so much, and that he was doing all right, he thought. It was nicer work than workingaround a soda fountain, and he might be making more money pretty soon--he couldn't tell--but as for more thanthat he either wouldn't or couldn't say. 　　And all the time the Griffiths--father and mother--were feeling that because of the affair in connection with Esta,they should really be moving away from Kansas City--should go to Denver. And now more than ever, Clyde wasinsisting that he did not want to leave Kansas City. They might go, but he had a pretty good job now and wantedto stick to it. And if they left, he could get a room somewhere--and would be all right--a thought which did notappeal to them at all. 　　But in the meantime what an enormous change in Clyde's life. Beginning with that first evening, when at 5:45,he appeared before Mr. Whipple, his immediate superior, and was approved--not only because of the fit of hisnew uniform, but for his general appearance--the world for him had changed entirely. Lined up with seven othersin the servants' hall, immediately behind the general offices in the lobby, and inspected by Mr. Whipple, thesquad of eight marched at the stroke of six through a door that gave into the lobby on the other side of thestaircase from where stood Mr. Whipple's desk, then about and in front of the general registration office to thelong bench on the other side. A Mr. Barnes, who alternated with Mr. Whipple, then took charge of the assistantcaptain's desk, and the boys seated themselves--Clyde at the foot--only to be called swiftly and in turn toperform this, that and the other service--while the relieved squad of Mr. Whipple was led away into the rearservants' hall as before, where they disbanded. 　　"Cling!"The bell on the room clerk's desk had sounded and the first boy was going. 　　"Cling!" It sounded again and a second boy leaped to his feet. 　　"Front!"--"Center door!" called Mr. Barnes, and a third boy was skidding down the long marble floor toward thatentrance to seize the bags of an incoming guest, whose white whiskers and youthful, bright tweed suit werevisible to Clyde's uninitiated eyes a hundred feet away. A mysterious and yet sacred vision--a tip! 　　"Front!" It was Mr. Barnes calling again. "See what 913 wants-- ice-water, I guess." And a fourth boy was gone. 　　Clyde, steadily moving up along the bench and adjoining Hegglund, who had been detailed to instruct him alittle, was all eyes and ears and nerves. He was so tense that he could hardly breathe, and fidgeted and jerkeduntil finally Hegglund exclaimed: "Now, don't get excited. Just hold your horses will yuh? You'll be all right. 　　You're jist like I was when I begun--all noives. But dat ain't de way. Easy's what you gotta be aroun' here. An' 　　you wants to look as dough you wasn't seein' nobody nowhere--just lookin' to what ya got before ya.""Front!" Mr. Barnes again. Clyde was scarcely able to keep his mind on what Hegglund was saying. "115 wants some writing paper and pens." A fifth boy had gone. 　　"Where do you get writing paper and pens if they want 'em?" He pleaded of his imtructor, as one who was aboutto die might plead. 　　"Off'n de key desk, I toldja. He's to de left over dere. He'll give 'em to ya. An' you gits ice-water in de hall welined up in just a minute ago--at dat end over dere, see--you'll see a little door. You gotta give dat guy in dere adime oncet in a while or he'll get sore.""Cling!" The room clerk's bell. A sixth boy had gone without a word to supply some order in that direction. 　　"And now remember," continued Hegglund, seeing that he himself was next, and cautioning him for the lasttime, "if dey wants drinks of any kind, you get 'em in de grill over dere off'n de dining-room. An' be sure and gitde names of de drinks straight or dey'll git sore. An' if it's a room you're showing, pull de shades down to-nightand turn on de lights. An' if it's anyt'ing from de dinin'- room you gotta see de headwaiter--he gets de tip, see.""Front!" He was up and gone. 　　And Clyde was number one. And number four was already seating himself again by his side--but lookingshrewdly around to see if anybody was wanted anywhere. 　　"Front!" It was Mr. Barnes. Clyde was up and before him, grateful that it was no one coming in with bags, butworried for fear it might be something that he would not understand or could not do quickly. 　　"See what 882 wants." Clyde was off toward one of the two elevators marked, "employees," the proper one touse, he thought, because he had been taken to the twelfth floor that way, but another boy stepping out from oneof the fast passenger elevators cautioned him as to his mistake. 　　"Goin' to a room?" he called. "Use the guest elevators. Them's for the servants or anybody with bundles."Clyde hastened to cover his mistake. "Eight," he called. There being no one else on the elevator with them, theNegro elevator boy in charge of the car saluted him at once. 　　"You'se new, ain't you? I ain't seen you around her befo'.""Yes, I just came on," replied Clyde. 　　"Well, you won't hate it here," commented this youth in the most friendly way. "No one hates this house, I'll say. 　　Eight did you say?" He stopped the car and Clyde stepped out. He was too nervous to think to ask the directionand now began looking at room numbers, only to decide after a moment that he was in the wrong corridor. Thesoft brown carpet under his feet; the soft, cream-tinted walls; the snow-white bowl lights in the ceiling--allseemed to him parts of a perfection and a social superiority which was almost unbelievable--so remote from allthat he had ever known. 　　And finally, finding 882, he knocked timidly and was greeted after a moment by a segment of a very stout andvigorous body in a blue and white striped union suit and a related segment of a round and florid head in whichwas set one eye and some wrinkles to one side of it. 　　"Here's a dollar bill, son," said the eye seemingly--and now a hand appeared holding a paper dollar. It was fatand red. "You go out to a haberdasher's and get me a pair of garters--Boston Garters-- silk--and hurry back.""Yes, sir," replied Clyde, and took the dollar. The door closed and he found himself hustling along the halltoward the elevator, wondering what a haberdasher's was. As old as he was--seventeen--the name was new tohim. He had never even heard it before, or noticed it at least. If the man had said a "gents' furnishing store," hewould have understood at once, but now here he was told to go to a haberdasher's and he did not know what itwas. A cold sweat burst out upon his forehead. His knees trembled. The devil! What would he do now? Could heask any one, even Hegglund, and not seem-He pushed the elevator button. The car began to descend. A haberdasher. A haberdasher. Suddenly a sanethought reached him. Supposing he didn't know what a haberdasher was? After all the man wanted a pair of silkBoston garters. Where did one get silk Boston garters--at a store, of course, a place where they sold things formen. Certainly. A gents' furnishing store. He would run out to a store. And on the way down, noting anotherfriendly Negro in charge, he asked: "Do you know if there's a gents' furnishing store anywhere around here?""One in the building, captain, right outside the south lobby," replied the Negro, and Clyde hurried there, greatlyrelieved. Yet he felt odd and strange in his close-fitting uniform and his peculiar hat. All the time he wastroubled by the notion that his small, round, tight-fitting hat might fall off. And he kept pressing it furtively andyet firmly down. And bustling into the haberdasher's, which was blazing with lights outside, he exclaimed, "Iwant to get a pair of Boston silk garters.""All right, son, here you are," replied a sleek, short man with bright, bald head, pink face and gold-rimmedglasses. "For some one in the hotel, I presume? Well, we'll make that seventy-five cents, and here's a dime foryou," he remarked as he wrapped up the package and dropped the dollar in the cash register. "I always like to dothe right thing by you boys in there because I know you come to me whenever you can."Clyde took the dime and the package, not knowing quite what to think. The garters must be seventy-five cents-hesaid so. Hence only twenty-five cents need to be returned to the man. Then the dime was his. And now,maybe--would the man really give him another tip? 　　He hurried back into the hotel and up to the elevators. The strains of a string orchestra somewhere were fillingthe lobby with delightful sounds. People were moving here and there--so well-dressed, so much at ease, so verydifferent from most of the people in the streets or anywhere, as he saw it. 　　An elevator door flew open. Various guests entered. Then Clyde and another bell-boy who gave him aninterested glance. At the sixth floor the boy departed. At the eighth Clyde and an old lady stepped forth. Hehurried to the door of his guest and tapped. The man opened it, somewhat more fully dressed than before. He hadon a pair of trousers and was shaving. 　　"Back, eh," he called. 　　"Yes, sir," replied Clyde, handing him the package and change. "He said it was seventy-five cents.""He's a damned robber, but you can keep the change, just the same," he replied, handing him the quarter andclosing the door. Clyde stood there, quite spellbound for the fraction of a second. "Thirty-five cents"--hethought--"thirty-five cents." And for one little short errand. Could that really be the way things went here? Itcouldn't be, really. It wasn't possible--not always. 　　And then, his feet sinking in the soft nap of the carpet, his hand in one pocket clutching the money, he felt as ifhe could squeal or laugh out loud. Why, thirty-five cents--and for a little service like that. This man had givenhim a quarter and the other a dime and he hadn't done anything at all. 　　He hurried from the car at the bottom--the strains of the orchestra once more fascinated him, the wonder of sowell-dressed a throng thrilling him--and made his way to the bench from which he had first departed. 　　And following this he had been called to carry the three bags and two umbrellas of an aged farmer-like couple,who had engaged a parlor, bedroom and bath on the fifth floor. En route they kept looking at him, as he couldsee, but said nothing. Yet once in their room, and after he had promptly turned on the lights near the door,lowered the blinds and placed the bags upon the bag racks, the middle-aged and rather awkward husband--adecidedly solemn and bewhiskered person--studied him and finally observed: "Young fella, you seem to be anice, brisk sort of boy--rather better than most we've seen so far, I must say.""I certainly don't think that hotels are any place for boys," chirped up the wife of his bosom--a large and rotundperson, who by this time was busily employed inspecting an adjoining room. "I certainly wouldn't want any ofmy boys to work in 'em--the way people act.""But here, young man," went on the elder, laying off his overcoat and fishing in his trousers pocket. "You godown and get me three or four evening papers if there are that many and a pitcher of ice-water, and I'll give youfifteen cents when you get back.""This hotel's better'n the one in Omaha, Pa," added the wife sententiously. "It's got nicer carpets and curtains."And as green as Clyde was, he could not help smiling secretly. Openly, however, he preserved a masklikesolemnity, seemingly effacing all facial evidence of thought, and took the change and went out. And in a fewmoments he was back with the ice-water and all the evening papers and departed smilingly with his fifteen cents. 　　But this, in itself, was but a beginning in so far as this particular evening was concerned, for he was scarcelyseated upon the bench again, before he was called to room 529, only to be sent to the bar for drinks--two gingerales and two syphons of soda--and this by a group of smartly-dressed young men and girls who were laughingand chattering in the room, one of whom opened the door just wide enough to instruct him as to what waswanted. But because of a mirror over the mantel, he could see the party and one pretty girl in a white suit andcap, sitting on the edge of a chair in which reclined a young man who had his arm about her. 　　Clyde stared, even while pretending not to. And in his state of mind, this sight was like looking through the gatesof Paradise. Here were young fellows and girls in this room, not so much older than himself, laughing andtalking and drinking even--not ice-cream sodas and the like, but such drinks no doubt as his mother and fatherwere always speaking against as leading to destruction, and apparently nothing was thought of it. 　　He bustled down to the bar, and having secured the drinks and a charge slip, returned--and was paid--a dollar anda half for the drinks and a quarter for himself. And once more he had a glimpse of the appealing scene. Only nowone of the couples was dancing to a tune sung and whistled by the other two. 　　But what interested him as much as the visits to and glimpses of individuals in the different rooms, was themoving panorama of the main lobby--the character of the clerks behind the main desk--room clerk, key clerk,mail clerk, cashier and assistant cashier. And the various stands about the place--flower stand, news stand, cigarstand, telegraph office, taxicab office, and all manned by individuals who seemed to him curiously filled with theatmosphere of this place. And then around and between all these walking or sitting were such imposing men andwomen, young men and girls all so fashionably dressed, all so ruddy and contented looking. And the cars orother vehicles in which some of them appeared about dinner time and later. It was possible for him to see them inthe flare of the lights outside. The wraps, furs, and other belongings in which they appeared, or which were oftencarried by these other boys and himself across the great lobby and into the cars or the dining-room or the severalelevators. And they were always of such gorgeous textures, as Clyde saw them. Such grandeur. This, then, mostcertainly was what it meant to be rich, to be a person of consequence in the world--to have money. It meant thatyou did what you pleased. That other people, like himself, waited upon you. That you possessed all of theseluxuries. That you went how, where and when you pleased.        当时明摆着: 格里菲思夫妇……阿萨和爱尔薇拉……对经济和社会问题特别缺乏经验，思想根源上也就跟克莱德的种种梦想完全吻合了。无论阿萨也好，还是爱尔薇拉也好，他们一点儿都不知道他要接手的这份工作的真正性质如何……对此他们跟他一样地无知……他们也不知道这份工作在道德。心理。经济或是其他方面，会对他产生哪些影响。因为他们俩一辈子都没有下榻过四等以上的旅馆。他们俩也从来没有去过一家高级饭馆，因为这种高级饭馆原来并不是为他们这些经济水平极差的人开设的。他们俩从来也没有想到过，就克莱德那种年纪和脾性的孩子来说，除了替客人把行李箱包从旅馆门口搬到帐房间，又从帐房间搬到旅馆门口以外，还可能会有别的什么工作，或者别的跟人交际的机遇。他们俩天真地认为: 这一类工作，不论在哪儿，工钱必定是微乎其微，比方说，每个星期给个五。六块美元就得了，也就是说，实际上比克莱德按照他的能耐和年纪应得的报酬还要少一些。 格里菲思太太看问题一向比她的丈夫实际些，对克莱德和其他的孩子们的经济利益非常关注。她心中暗自纳闷，真不知道克莱德换了个新地方，怎么就突然如此兴高采烈起来，根据他自己的说法，到那里上班时间要比过去长，薪水嘛，即使假定说稍微多点，比过去也多不了很多。当然罗，他已经暗示过，这一回他进了旅馆，也许将来有希望提升到较高的职位，比方说，当上一个职员什么的，不过，他可不知道何年何月才能如愿以偿啊，而原来那个地方却肯定能使他较快地实现自己……至少是赚钱的……的愿望。 不过星期一下午，他急冲冲回来，说他找到了这个职位，马上得换上领带和硬领，理完发赶回去报到……这些她都看到了，心里也就觉得宽慰一些了。 因为过去她从来没看见他对什么事表示过这样高兴;这件事让他比较称心了一些……而不是象过去有的时候那样闷闷不乐。 可是现在他上班的时间很长……从早上六点钟起，一直到深更半夜……除了偶尔有几个晚上，他没有工作，而又想要早些回家的时候，他才回来得早些……那时他会费心解释说，他下班早了一点……那神态也是岌岌不安的……只要他不是在睡觉。穿衣或脱衣的时候，可以说他无时无刻都恨不得马上能离开自己的家……这不由得使他母亲和阿萨感到困惑不解。酒店! 酒店! 他老是急冲冲赶去酒店上班，他口口声声地说他非常喜欢这家酒店，还认为自己干得满不错。这种工作比围着汽水柜台转反正好得多了，他不久也许还能多挣一些钱呢……至于有多少，他还说不准……但是除此以外，要么是他不乐意说，要么是他说不出道道来。 格里菲思夫妇……孩子他们的父母……时时刻刻都觉得，由于爱思达出走一事，说实话，他们应该离开堪萨斯城……应该举家迁往丹佛。可是克莱德却比过去更加坚决，说他不愿意离开堪萨斯城。他们要去就去呗;可他现在有了一个肥缺，自然要牢牢守住它。他们要是搬走了，他就不妨上哪儿去找个房间……而且他照样会过得很好……这个想法他们一点儿也不赞成。 可是就在这个时候，克莱德的生活却发生了多么大的变化! 从头一天晚上，五点三刻，他来到惠普尔先生面前，顶头上司对他表示满意……不仅仅因为新制服他很合身，而且还因为他的整个模样儿也不错……打从这时起，他觉得世界就完全变了样。他在大厅里紧挨总帐房间后面侍应生集合的过道里，和另外七个小伙子站成一排，经过惠普尔先生检查后，等到时钟敲了六下，这时，他们这一拨八个人一齐迈开步子，走过通向楼梯另一侧(惠普尔先生的写字台就设在这里)休息室的那道门，然后拐弯从总登记处前面绕了过去，走向对面的那只长条凳。有一位名叫巴恩斯先生的接了惠普尔先生的班，履行副领班的职责。 侍应生们便坐了下来……克莱德坐在末尾……不过他们马上听候传唤，依次去干各式各样差使……与此同时，惠普尔先生率领的那拨歇班人员，照例被带到后面侍应生集合的过道，然后就地解散了。 "丁零零! "领班写字台上铃声一响，头一个侍应生马上跑了过去。 "丁零零! "铃声又响了，第二个侍应生也应声一跃而起。 "上来一个! "……"快去中门! "巴恩斯先生大声喊道。第三个侍应生顺着长长的大理石地面朝中门溜了过去，接住一位来客的手提包。这个客人白花花的连鬓胡子，和不合年龄。色调鲜明的苏格兰呢行装……克莱德这双即使还不内行的眼睛在一百英尺开外早就看见了。眼前立刻浮现出一个神秘而又神圣的幻象……小费! "上来一个! "巴恩斯先生又在大声喊道。"去看看九一三号房间要些什么……我说大概要冰水呗。"第四个侍应生马上就去了。 克莱德在长条凳上一个劲儿往前挪，紧挨着那个曾经奉命前来点拨他的赫格伦，眼睛。耳朵和神经……几乎浑身上下都紧张起来，以致连气也透不过来，而且一个劲儿在抖索。后来，赫格伦终于开了腔，说道: "喂，别紧张哟。只要沉住气，你懂吗。你准行。你这副得〔德〕行，正象我当初一开始时一样……全身抖索得好厉害。不过拿〔那〕样是药〔要〕不得的。到了这儿，你就得不慌不忙。你该做到好象你不管哪一个人都没看见似的……只是一心注意你眼前该做的事。""上来一个! "巴恩斯先生又在大声喊道。赫格伦还在说些什么，克莱德几乎没得心思听下去了。"一一五号房间要纸和笔。"第五个侍应生马上就去了。 "要是客人要纸和笔，该上哪儿找去? "他赶紧恳求赫格伦指点一下，仿佛临终前的人在苦苦哀求似的。 "我跟你说，就在管钥匙的帐房那里。他就在靠左边那儿。他会给你的。要冰水，就上刚才我们站队集合的过道去……在拿〔那〕一头，你懂吗……你会看到有个小门。那个家伙会给你冰水，可你下一回就得给他十个美分，要不然，他就要冒火了。""丁零零! "领班的铃声又响了。第六个侍应生一言不语地前去听候吩咐了。 "现在还得要记住，"赫格伦因为下一个就要轮到他自己了，这才最后一次地提醒克莱德，"假如大〔他〕们要喝什么，你就上餐厅那边的酒吧间去取。千万要把酒名老〔闹〕清楚，要不然大〔他〕们就要恼火了。今儿晚上你要是引领客人到房间去，就得把窗帘拉下来，把灯一一拧开。你要是上餐厅给客人取什么东事〔西〕，先得问一下那边的领班……小费嘛全归你，你懂吗。""上来一个! "赫格伦霍地一跃而起，走了。 这下子克莱德便成了头一号。那四号已经又挨在他身边坐下了……目光尖锐地在东张西望着，看哪儿需要人。 "上来一个! "这是巴恩斯先生的喊叫声。克莱德马上站了起来，走到他跟前，真是谢天谢地，这当儿幸亏没有客人拎着手提包进来，不过，他又很担心叫他去做也许是他不懂的，或是他不能很快就完成的差使。 "去看看八八二号房间要些什么。"克莱德冲那两部电梯中标明"职工专用"的一部直奔了过去。他心里捉摸是应该乘这一部吧，因为刚才他就是搭这部电梯上十二层楼的。可是，从旅客的快速电梯里走出来的另一个侍应生却提醒他，说他走错了。 "上客房去吗? "他说。"就搭客人的电梯。那两部是给职工或是携带行李的人搭乘的。"克莱德连忙改正自己的错误，赶过去说: "八楼。"电梯里没有其他的人，开电梯的黑人马上招呼他说: "你是新来的，是不是? 以浅〔前〕我可没见过你。""是的，我才进店哩，"克莱德回答说。 "嘿，你准不会腻味这个店呗，"那个年轻小伙子和颜悦色地说。"我说，谁都不会腻味这个大酒店。你是说上八楼吧? "他停了一下，克莱德就走出了电梯。 这时他心里太紧张了，顾不上问清楚该往哪一边走，就连忙去看房间号码，寻摸了一会儿，才断定自己走错过道了。他脚下是柔软的棕色地毯，两旁是柔和的奶油色墙壁，嵌在天花板里的则是雪白的滴溜滚圆电灯……这一切，在他看来，都是达到了至臻至美境界，显示了那么一种高贵的社会地位，几乎令人难以置信……与他从前见过的相比，真有十万八千里远哩。 最后，他找到了八八二号，战战兢兢地敲敲门，隔了一会儿才有一个人从半掩着门里招呼他，此人身穿一套蓝白条子内衣，露出矮胖粗壮的半边身子，以及连在一起的半个圆圆的。红光满面的脑袋，还有一只梢上略带鱼尾细纹的眼睛。 "这是一张一块头美钞，小伙计，"好象是那只眼睛在说话……接着便伸出来一只手，手里拿着一张一块头美钞。那是……一只红盈盈。胖乎乎的手。"你上服饰店去，给我买一副吊袜带……波士顿吊袜带……真丝的……快一点回来。""是，先生，"克莱德回答说，一手把钱接住。门关上了，克莱德急冲冲沿着过道直奔电梯而去，心里暗自纳闷这服饰店是个什么样儿的。虽说他已有那么大的年纪……十七岁了……这样一个店名，对于他却是陌生得很。从前他甚至连听都没有听说过，或者至少是没有注意过这个店名。要是此人说"男子服装用品商店"，那他一听就懂了，可现在此人关照他到男子服饰店去，他真不知道那是怎么回事。他额头上沁出一些冷汗，两个膝盖也在瑟瑟发抖。见鬼! 如今怎么办呢? 他能不能问问别人，哪怕是问问赫格伦，不要显得好象……他摁了一下电梯按纽。电梯开始下来了。服饰店。服饰店。突然，他眉头一皱，灵机一动。假定说他不知道服饰店是怎么回事，那又有什么了不起? 反正此人要的是一副波士顿真丝吊袜带。上哪儿去寻摸波士顿真丝吊袜带呢……当然罗，到百货店去，那里是销售男子用品的地方。那还用说嘛。准是男子服装用品商店。他一溜小跑，奔出去寻摸这么一家商铺。下去的时候，他看见开电梯的另一个和颜悦色的黑人，就开口问道: "你可知道本店附近哪儿有男子服装用品商店? ""本大楼里就有一家，领班，正好在南大厅外面，"那个黑人回答说。克莱德至此才松了一口气，便急急忙忙赶到了那里。不过，他身穿的这套紧身制服，头戴那顶很怪的帽子，自己觉得总有一点儿希奇百怪的样儿。他仿佛老是在担心他那顶圆圆的。紧扣脑勺的小帽，说不定会掉下来。他不时偷偷地使劲儿把它往下扣一扣，急急乎奔进一家门口灯光通明的服饰店，大声嚷嚷: "我要一副波士顿真丝吊袜带。""得了，小伙子，这就是呗，"一个油嘴滑舌的矮个儿掌柜说。此人脑门光秃，脸色红润，戴着一副金边眼镜。"是替酒店里客人买的，是吗? 得了，就算它七十五个美分吧，这儿十个美分是给你的，"此人一边这么说，一边包扎，把那一块头美钞扔进钱柜里。"我对你们这些侍应生，一向是特别优待的，因为我知道你们下回还会来作成我的生意。"克莱德手里拿着那十个美分和纸包，真不知道该怎么个想法哩。那副吊袜带的价钱想必是七十五个美分……此人就是这么说的。因此，只要把二十五个美分找头交还那位客人就得了。那末，这十个美分就归他自己了。再说，也许……此人真的还会另外再赏给他一点小费呢。 他急忙忙赶回酒店，直奔电梯而去。一个弦乐队正在演奏一支曲子，悦耳的乐声在大厅里荡漾着。他看见那里人们有的走过来，有的走过去……他们穿着那么精美讲究，神态那么从容自在，跟大街上或是别处的人群简直大异其趣。 电梯门开了。好几位客人走了进去。随后进去的，是克莱德跟另一个好奇地看了他一眼的侍应生。到了六楼，那个侍应生走了出来。克莱德和一位老太太是在八楼才走出了电梯。他急急忙忙赶到他那位客人的房门口，轻轻地敲了两下。此人把门打开，身上比刚才穿得多少齐整一些。这时，他穿上了长裤，正在刮脸。 "回来了，嗯? "他大声说道。 "是的，先生，"克莱德一面回答说，一面把纸包和找头交给他，"那掌柜的说是七十五个美分。""他简直是个强盗。不过，得了吧，找头你照例拿着，"客人一面回答说，一面把那二十五个美分给了他，顺手把门关上了。克莱德伫立在那里，刹那间简直给愣住了。"三十五个美分，"……他暗自寻思道……"三十五个美分呀。"只不过短短的跑了这么一趟。难道说这里的事儿，真的样样都是这个样吗? 真的，不会这样的。这是不可能的……决不会老是这个样。 随后，他的两只脚踩着地毯上松软的柔毛，他的那只手正把钱紧紧地攥在口袋里，他真的恨不得长啸尖叫，或者放声大笑。真有意思，三十五个美分……仅仅干了这么一丁点儿小事。这个人给了他二十五个美分，那个人也给了十个美分，而他压根儿也没有做多少事啊。 他一到了底层，急冲冲走出了电梯……乐队的曲子又把他给迷住了，那衣香鬓影的人群，也使他飘飘然了……他穿过那些令人惊异的人群，又回到了他刚才离开的长条凳那里。 打这以后，他又被传唤，去替一对上了年纪。仿佛是农场主的夫妇拎三只手提箱包和两把雨伞;他们已在五楼定好了一套房间，包括一个小客厅。一间卧室和一个浴室。他发现，一路上他们两眼直瞅着他，始终一言不语。克莱德一进他们房间，马上打开房门边的电灯，把窗帘拉了下来，把手提箱包搁到行李架上，那个有点儿笨头笨脑。已届中年的丈夫……他蓄着络腮胡子，一望可知，举止十分稳重……把克莱德仔细端详了一番，最后才这么说: "小伙计，你好象很讨人喜欢，而且灵活得很……我可得要说，比我们过去碰到过的那些人要好。""我当然并不认为，酒店就是孩子们该去的好去处，"他那心爱的妻子叽叽喳喳地说……她不但个儿大，而且胖得圆滚滚的，这时正忙于察看连在一起的那个房间。"当然，我决不会让我们家的孩子到酒店里工作……那些人的所作所为就够你瞧的了。""不过，你听着，年轻小伙子，"那个年纪较大的男人接下去说，一面把外套放好，一面在裤袋里掏钱。"你就下楼去，给我买三。四份晚报，要是买得到这么多的话;此外，还要捎上一瓶冰水;你一回来，我就给你十五个美分。""这家酒店要比奥马哈那家好得多，孩子他爹，"妻子言简意赅地找补着说。 "这里的地毯和窗帘也要漂亮些。"克莱德虽说还是一个新手，这时也禁不住暗自发笑。不过表面上他却装得一本正经，看来他的内心活动一点儿也都没有露出痕迹来，只是拿着一些零钱就走了出去。不一会儿，他拿着冰水和所有能买到的晚报回来了。于是，他就得了那十五个美分，笑眯眯地走了。 不过，就拿这个很不平常的夜晚来说，这才不过是刚开始，因为他回到长条凳上还没有落座，又被传唤到五二九号房间去，仅仅是叫他上酒吧间去取饮料……两瓶姜汁汽水和两瓶汽水……这一次叫他的，是一拨身穿漂亮时装的少男少女。他们正在房间里说说笑笑，吵吵闹闹，里头有一位把门儿稍微打开一条缝，以便吩咐他去干些什么事。不过因为壁炉架上有一面镜子，他不仅看得见这一拨人，而且还看见身穿白色衣帽的一位漂亮姑娘，坐在一张椅子边上，有个年轻人正斜靠在椅子上，一条胳膊搂住她的纤腰。 克莱德两眼直勾勾瞅着，虽然还得竭力装出目不旁视的样子来。不过，拿他这时的心态来说，这种情景仿佛透过天堂的大门往里窥探似的。这个房间里，都是一些少男少女，论年龄，不见得比他大多少，正在有说有笑，甚至他们喝的……并不是冰淇淋汽水这一类东西，而是他的父母一向表示反对。而且据说还诱使人走向毁灭的那类饮料，看来这一拨青年人，对此倒是满不在乎。 他连忙下楼，到酒吧间去，取了饮料和一张发票就回来了……他们把钱给了他……饮料一块美元，小费二十五个美分。那诱人的情景……他又乜了一眼。 不过这会儿只有一对伴侣，踩着其他两对伴侣吹着口哨和哼唱着一支乐曲节拍，正在婆娑起舞。 不过，除了他来到各个房间里对形形色色的客人匆匆投以一瞥以外，同样引起他莫大兴趣的，乃是酒店进门大厅里永不停息的活动全景……总帐房间后面那些职员的种种分工职责……有的管客房的，有的管钥匙的，也有的管函件的，此外还有出纳和助理出纳等等。大厅四周围还有各式各样的摊位……花铺。 报亭。烟铺，以及电报室。出租汽车营业处等等，这些地方的所有经管人员，在他看来，真怪，个个都散发出这个大酒店的特殊气味。而在这些摊位周围和中间，不论是在走动或是坐下来的，净是那些神气活现的男男女女，以及年轻的小伙子和姑娘们，个个穿戴得那么入时，而且个个红光满面，踌躇满志。还有那些汽车和其他车辆，有的都是在晚宴时和夜深时开到的，借着门外令人眩目的灯光，他才能看得到。还有他们搭在身上的披肩。皮毛围脖和其他类似的东西，往往由其他侍应生和他自己拿着，走过进门大厅，送上汽车，或是送至餐厅，或是送上电梯。反正克莱德看得出来，这些东西总是用极为珍贵的料子做成的。该有多么豪华气派啊。由此可见，要想当富翁。当社会上了不起的人物，意味着……要有钱，这不就是一清二楚了吗。那时也就意味着，你爱怎么办，就可以怎么办了。而别人，如同他克莱德这号人，就会殷勤侍候你。所有这些奢侈品，你也通通有了。那时你爱上哪儿，你爱怎么个去法，你又爱在什么时候去……一切一切都随你高兴就得了。

Part 1 Chapter 7 And so, of all the influences which might have come to Clyde at this time, either as an aid or an injury to hisdevelopment, perhaps the most dangerous for him, considering his temperament, was this same Green-Davidson,than which no more materially affected or gaudy a realm could have been found anywhere between the two greatAmerican mountain ranges. Its darkened and cushioned tea-room, so somber and yet tinted so gayly with coloredlights, was an ideal rendezvous, not only for such inexperienced and eager flappers of the period who were to betaken by a show of luxury, but also for those more experienced and perhaps a little faded beauties, who had athought for their complexions and the advantages of dim and uncertain lights. Also, like most hotels of its kind, itwas frequented by a certain type of eager and ambitious male of not certain age or station in life, who countedupon his appearance here at least once, if not twice a day, at certain brisk and interesting hours, to establish forhimself the reputation of man-about-town, or rounder, or man of wealth, or taste, or attractiveness, or all. 　　And it was not long after Clyde had begun to work here that he was informed by these peculiar boys with whomhe was associated, one or more of whom was constantly seated with him upon the "hop-bench," as they called it,as to the evidence and presence even here--it was not long before various examples of the phenomena werepointed out to him--of a certain type of social pervert, morally disarranged and socially taboo, who sought toarrest and interest boys of their type, in order to come into some form of illicit relationship with them, which atfirst Clyde could not grasp. The mere thought of it made him ill. And yet some of these boys, as he was now informed--a certain youth in particular, who was not on the same watch with him at this time--were supposed tobe of the mind that "fell for it," as one of the other youths phrased it. 　　And the talk and the palaver that went on in the lobby and the grill, to say nothing of the restaurants and rooms,were sufficient to convince any inexperienced and none-too-discerning mind that the chief business of life forany one with a little money or social position was to attend a theater, a ball-game in season, or to dance, motor,entertain friends at dinner, or to travel to New York, Europe, Chicago, California. And there had been in the livesof most of these boys such a lack of anything that approached comfort or taste, let alone luxury, that not unlikeClyde, they were inclined to not only exaggerate the import of all that they saw, but to see in this suddentransition an opportunity to partake of it all. Who were these people with money, and what had they done thatthey should enjoy so much luxury, where others as good seemingly as themselves had nothing? And wherein didthese latter differ so greatly from the successful? Clyde could not see. Yet these thoughts flashed through theminds of every one of these boys. 　　At the same time the admiration, to say nothing of the private overtures of a certain type of woman or girl, whoinhibited perhaps by the social milieu in which she found herself, but having means, could invade such a regionas this, and by wiles and smiles and the money she possessed, ingratiate herself into the favor of some of themore attractive of these young men here, was much commented upon. 　　Thus a youth named Ratterer--a hall-boy here--sitting beside him the very next afternoon, seeing a trim, well-formed blonde woman of about thirty enter with a small dog upon her arm, and much bedecked with furs, firstnudged him and, with a faint motion of the head indicating her vicinity, whispered, "See her? There's a swift one. 　　I'll tell you about her sometime when I have time. Gee, the things she don't do!""What about her?" asked Clyde, keenly curious, for to him she seemed exceedingly beautiful, most fascinating. 　　"Oh, nothing, except she's been in with about eight different men around here since I've been here. She fell forDoyle"--another hall-boy whom by this time Clyde had already observed as being the quintessence ofChesterfieldian grace and airs and looks, a youth to imitate--"for a while, but now she's got some one else.""Really?" inquired Clyde, very much astonished and wondering if such luck would ever come to him. 　　"Surest thing you know," went on Ratterer. "She's a bird that way--never gets enough. Her husband, they tellme, has a big lumber business somewhere over in Kansas, but they don't live together no more. She has one ofthe best suites on the sixth, but she ain't in it half the time. The maid told me."This same Ratterer, who was short and stocky but good-looking and smiling, was so smooth and bland andgenerally agreeable that Clyde was instantly drawn to him and wished to know him better. And Rattererreciprocated that feeling, for he had the notion that Clyde was innocent and inexperienced and that he would liketo do some little thing for him if he could. 　　The conversation was interrupted by a service call, and never resumed about this particular woman, but the effecton Clyde was sharp. The woman was pleasing to look upon and exceedingly well-groomed, her skin clear, hereyes bright. Could what Ratterer had been telling him really be true? She was so pretty. He sat and gazed, a vision of something which he did not care to acknowledge even to himself tingling the roots of his hair. 　　And then the temperaments and the philosophy of these boys--Kinsella, short and thick and smooth-faced and alittle dull, as Clyde saw it, but good-looking and virile, and reported to be a wizard at gambling, who, throughoutthe first three days at such times as other matters were not taking his attention, had been good enough to continueHegglund's instructions in part. He was a more suave, better spoken youth than Hegglund, though not soattractive as Ratterer, Clyde thought, without the latter's sympathetic outlook, as Clyde saw it. 　　And again, there was Doyle--Eddie--whom Clyde found intensely interesting from the first, and of whom he wasnot a little jealous, because he was so very good-looking, so trim of figure, easy and graceful of gesture, and withso soft and pleasing a voice. He went about with an indescribable air which seemed to ingratiate him instantlywith all with whom he came in contact--the clerks behind the counter no less than the strangers who entered andasked this or that question of him. His shoes and collar were so clean and trim, and his hair cut and brushed andoiled after a fashion which would have become a moving-picture actor. From the first Clyde was utterlyfascinated by his taste in the matter of dress--the neatest of brown suits, caps, with ties and socks to match. Heshould wear a brown-belted coat just like that. He should have a brown cap. And a suit as well cut and attractive. 　　Similarly, a not unrelated and yet different effect was produced by that same youth who had first introducedClyde to the work here--Hegglund--who was one of the older and more experienced bell-hops, and ofconsiderable influence with the others because of his genial and devil-may-care attitude toward everything,outside the exact line of his hotel duties. Hegglund was neither as schooled nor as attractive as some of theothers, yet by reason of a most avid and dynamic disposition--plus a liberality where money and pleasure wereconcerned, and a courage, strength and daring which neither Doyle nor Ratterer nor Kinsella could match--astrength and daring almost entirely divested of reason at times--he interested and charmed Clyde immensely. Ashe himself related to Clyde, after a time, he was the son of a Swedish journeyman baker who some years beforein Jersey City had deserted his mother and left her to make her way as best she could. In consequence neitherOscar nor his sister Martha had had any too much education or decent social experience of any kind. On thecontrary, at the age of fourteen he had left Jersey City in a box car and had been making his way ever since asbest he could. And like Clyde, also, he was insanely eager for all the pleasures which he had imagined he sawswirling around him, and was for prosecuting adventures in every direction, lacking, however, the nervous fearof consequence which characterized Clyde. Also he had a friend, a youth by the name of Sparser, somewhatolder than himself, who was chauffeur to a wealthy citizen of Kansas City, and who occasionally managed topurloin a car and so accommodate Hegglund in the matter of brief outings here and there; which courtesy,unconventional and dishonest though it might be, still caused Hegglund to feel that he was a wonderful fellowand of much more importance than some of these others, and to lend him in their eyes a luster which had little ofthe reality which it suggested to them. 　　Not being as attractive as Doyle, it was not so easy for him to win the attention of girls, and those he did succeedin interesting were not of the same charm or import by any means. Yet he was inordinately proud of suchcontacts as he could effect and not a little given to boasting in regard to them, a thing which Clyde took withmore faith than would most, being of less experience. For this reason Hegglund liked Clyde, almost from thevery first, sensing in him perhaps a pleased and willing auditor. 　　So, finding Clyde on the bench beside him from time to time, he had proceeded to continue his instructions. 　　Kansas City was a fine place to be if you knew how to live. He had worked in other cities--Buffalo, Cleveland,Detroit, St. Louis--before he came here, but he had not liked any of them any better, principally--which was afact which he did not trouble to point out at the time--because he had not done as well in those places as he hadhere. He had been a dishwasher, car-cleaner, plumber's helper and several other things before finally, in Buffalo,he had been inducted into the hotel business. And then a youth, working there, but who was now no longer here,had persuaded him to come on to Kansas City. But here: 　　"Say--de tips in dis hotel is as big as you'll git anywhere, I know dat. An' what's more, dey's nice people workin' 　　here. You do your bit by dem and dey'll do right by you. I been here now over a year an' I ain't got no complaint. 　　Dat guy Squires is all right if you don't cause him no trouble. He's hard, but he's got to look out for hisself, too-dat'snatural. But he don't fire nobody unless he's got a reason. I know dat, too. And as for de rest dere's notrouble. An' when your work's troo, your time's your own. Dese fellows here are good sports, all o' dem. Dey'reno four-flushers an' no tightwads, eider. Whenever dere's anyting on--a good time or sumpin' like dat, dey're on-nearlyall of 'em. An' dey don't mooch or grouch in case tings don't work out right, neider. I know dat, cause Ibeen wit 'em now, lots o' times."He gave Clyde the impression that these youths were all the best of friends--close--all but Doyle, who was a littlestandoffish, but not coldly so. "He's got too many women chasin' him, dat's all." Also that they went here andthere together on occasion--to a dance hall, a dinner, a certain gambling joint down near the river, a certainpleasure resort--"Kate Sweeney's"--where were some peaches of girls--and so on and so forth, a world of suchinformation as had never previously been poured into Clyde's ear, and that set him meditating, dreaming,doubting, worrying and questioning as to the wisdom, charm, delight to be found in all this--also thepermissibility of it in so far as he was concerned. For had he not been otherwise instructed in regard to all this allhis life long? There was a great thrill and yet a great question involved in all to which he was now listening soattentively. 　　Again there was Thomas Ratterer, who was of a type which at first glance, one would have said, could scarcelyprove either inimical or dangerous to any of the others. He was not more than five feet four, plump, with blackhair and olive skin, and with an eye that was as limpid as water and as genial as could be. He, too, as Clydelearned after a time, was of a nondescript family, and so had profited by no social or financial advantages of anykind. But he had a way, and was liked by all of these youths--so much so that he was consulted about nearlyeverything. A native of Wichita, recently moved to Kansas City, he and his sister were the principal support of awidowed mother. During their earlier and formative years, both had seen their very good-natured andsympathetic mother, of whom they were honestly fond, spurned and abused by a faithless husband. There hadbeen times when they were quite without food. On more than one occasion they had been ejected for nonpaymentof rent. None too continuously Tommy and his sister had been maintained in various public schools. 　　Finally, at the age of fourteen he had decamped to Kansas City, where he had secured different odd jobs, until hesucceeded in connecting himself with the Green-Davidson, and was later joined by his mother and sister who hadremoved from Wichita to Kansas City to be with him. 　　But even more than by the luxury of the hotel or these youths, whom swiftly and yet surely he was beginning todecipher, Clyde was impressed by the downpour of small change that was tumbling in upon him and making asmall lump in his right-hand pants pocket--dimes, nickels, quarters and half-dollars even, which increased andincreased even on the first day until by nine o'clock he already had over four dollars in his pocket, and by twelve, at which hour he went off duty, he had over six and a half--as much as previously he had earned in a week. 　　And of all this, as he then knew, he need only hand Mr. Squires one--no more, Hegglund had said--and the rest,five dollars and a half, for one evening's interesting--yes, delightful and fascinating--work, belonged to himself. 　　He could scarcely believe it. It seemed fantastic, Aladdinish, really. Nevertheless, at twelve, exactly, of that firstday a gong had sounded somewhere--a shuffle of feet had been heard and three boys had appeared--one to takeBarnes' place at the desk, the other two to answer calls. And at the command of Barnes, the eight who werepresent were ordered to rise, right dress and march away. And in the hall outside, and just as he was leaving,Clyde approached Mr. Squires and handed him a dollar in silver. "That's right," Mr. Squires remarked. No more. 　　Then, Clyde, along with the others, descended to his locker, changed his clothes and walked out into thedarkened streets, a sense of luck and a sense of responsibility as to future luck so thrilling him as to make himrather tremulous--giddy, even. 　　To think that now, at last, he actually had such a place. To think that he could earn this much every day, maybe. 　　He began to walk toward his home, his first thought being that he must sleep well and so be fit for his duties inthe morning. But thinking that he would not need to return to the hotel before 11:30 the next day, he wanderedinto an all-night beanery to have a cup of coffee and some pie. And now all he was thinking was that he wouldonly need to work from noon until six, when he should be free until the following morning at six. And then hewould make more money. A lot of it to spend on himself.        因此，在当时所有可能对克莱德产生……不管是对他的发展有利也好，有害也好……影响的因素中，如果考虑到他的脾性，其中对他危害性最大的，也许就数这一家格林－戴维逊大酒店了，因为在美国两大山脉(落基山脉和阿巴拉契亚山脉之间的地区，亦即泛指整个美国。)中间，哪儿也找不到一个在物质生活上比这里还要奢靡无度，或则粗俗无味的地方了。这里咖啡茶室，一律陈设软椅，光线虽然暗淡，仿佛有点儿阴沉沉，但到处点缀着各色彩灯，令人赏心悦目，依然不失为一个理想的幽会之地。当时不但那些毫无经验。却又急于调情取乐的时髦女郎一见这种豪华景象就为之心醉神迷了，而且连那些经验丰富。 也许姿色渐衰的美人儿，一想到自己的容颜，何妨不好好利用一下那些摇曳不定的幽暗灯光呢。再说，这家大酒店，如同绝大多数大酒店一样，总是顾客盈门，他们都是一些热衷名利而又野心勃勃的男人，尽管他们年龄。职业各不相同，却都认为: 在热闹有趣的时刻，如果说不是一天来两次的话，至少也得有一次来这儿抛头露面，以便为自己树立声望，表示他是上流社会名人，或是豪放不羁，或是拥有巨富，或是情趣高雅，或是善于博取女人欢心的男人，或则干脆说，他就是以上种种特点皆备于一身的人。 克莱德来这里工作不久，这些跟他一起共事。与众不同的侍应生，其中有好几个经常跟他一块儿坐在那条被他们叫做"跳凳"上的，就告诉他说，甚至还有某一种社会败类，一些道德腐败。被社会遗弃的女人，也在这里出没无常，她们一心只想挑逗与勾引他们这些侍应生，进而同她们发生不正当的关系。其实，他来了没有多久，他们就把这一现象的各式各样的实例都指给他看了，至于那究竟是怎么回事，开头克莱德还闹不明白。所以，他只要一想到这事，就觉得恶心。可是后来有人对他说，有好几个侍应生，特别是不跟他在一块值班的某一个年轻的侍应生，据说全都"上了钩"(这是另一个侍应生形象化的说法)。 仅仅是大厅里和酒吧间闲扯淡那一套，更不用说餐厅和客房里的场面，就足以使任何一个既没有经验。又没有判断是非能力的人相信: 对于任何一个有了一点儿钱，或则一点儿社会地位的人，一生中最要紧的事情，莫过于上剧院。 看球赛，或是去跳舞。开汽车兜风。设宴请客，或是到纽约。欧洲。芝加哥。 加利福尼亚去玩儿。既然舒适享受或高雅情趣在这些侍应生昔日的生活中付之阙如，至于奢华无度，那就更谈不上了，因此，他们如同克莱德一样，不仅喜欢把他们在本店所见到的一切加以夸大，而且认为好象这种突然时来运转，使他们自己也有分沾这一切的好机会了。这些有钱人，究竟是什么样的人? 他们干了些什么，就应该享受如此奢侈无度的生活? 而那些看起来同他们一模一样的人，干吗就一无所有呢? 这些后一种人，与那些飞黄腾达的人之间差别干吗会有如此之大呢? 凡此种种克莱德都想不通。不过，这些想法在每一个侍应生心里都曾经一闪而过的。 与此同时，这里议论得最多的，就是他们所赞赏的那一种女人(或者年轻姑娘)，她也许囿于自己身处的社会环境，可是因为有钱，就可以闯入这样一个花天酒地的大饭店，凭借她所具有的诱惑。微笑和金钱等手段，居然博得这里年轻人中一些小白脸的欢心，更不必说她们私下求婚的风流轶事了。 比方说，转天下午跟克莱德坐在一起值班。那个名叫拉特勒的年轻小伙子……是酒店大厅的侍应生……看见一个约莫三十岁。衣着整洁。身段苗条的碧眼金发美人儿，身上披着裘皮大衣，胳臂上偎着一头小狗，走了进来。拉特勒先是轻轻地用胳膊肘推推克莱德，随后冲美人儿那边点点头，低声说: "看见她了吗? 叫人上钩，她可真是个快手。哪天有空，我就把她的事讲给你听呗。嘿，什么事她干不出来! ""那她怎么啦? "克莱德急于知道她的底细，便开口问道，因为他觉得她美极了，简直太迷人了。 "哦，没有什么，不过嘛，打从我上这儿干活算起，她已经跟这儿八个人都搞过了。她迷上了多伊尔，"……这是指大厅的另一个侍应生，这时克莱德早已注意过他，觉得: 论文雅。风度和仪表，此人可以说深得切斯特菲尔德(切斯特菲尔德(１６９４—１７７３): 英国政治家与作家，此人在英国常常作为讲究礼仪而又风流的典型人物。)的三昧，堪称当今青年人的楷模……"可是没有多久，现在呢，她却跟别人搞上了。""是真的吗? "克莱德大吃一惊地问，心里却在纳闷这种好运道会不会也落到自己头上来。 "千真万确，"拉特勒接下去说。"她就是这一号人……永远不会嫌多的。听人说，她的丈夫在堪萨斯那边做很大的木材生意，不过，他们早就不住在一块儿了。她在六楼开了一套最讲究的房间，不过多半是不住在那里的。这是女茶房告诉我的。"这一个拉特勒，个儿又矮又胖，不过长得倒还漂亮，脸上总是带笑，说话圆滑，待人殷勤，而且也很讨人喜欢，克莱德一下子就给他吸引住了，恨不得跟他多拉点交情。拉特勒也回报了他这种感情，因为他觉得克莱德很天真，又缺少经验，所以，他也很乐意为他略尽微劳。 他们正说着话，忽被传唤人的铃声打断了，后来再也没有提到那个放荡不羁的女人，不过，刚才这一席话，却给予克莱德很大的影响。这个女人的外貌很讨人喜欢，打扮也非常讲究，她的肌肤洁白如玉，一双眼眸老是亮闪闪。拉特勒刚才告诉他的话，难道说是真的吗? 她多漂亮! 他坐在那里，两眼凝视着，面前浮现出一个朦朦胧胧。使他神经末梢也为之呵痒的幻象，其意义甚至连他自个儿都不愿意招认呢。 再说说那些侍应生的脾性和人生观吧……那个金塞拉，个儿矮胖粗壮，脸蛋也很光滑，只是克莱德觉得他有一点儿迟钝，不过模样儿还算好看，而且孔武有力，赌起钱来，听说简直神极了。开头三天，他倒是甘心情愿，把他所有业余时间，全都用来点拨赫格伦的新徒弟克莱德。倘若与赫格伦相比，他就是一个温文尔雅。善于辞令的好后生，不过，克莱德觉得，他比不上拉特勒那样吸引人，也没有后者那样富于同情心。 还有那个多伊尔……埃迪。多伊尔……克莱德一开头就发觉他特别有趣，而且对他产生了嫉妒心理，因为他长得非常好看，身材匀称，举止潇洒飘逸，声音柔和悦耳。他有一种难以名状的风度，凡是同他打过交道的人，一下子都会喜欢他……不论是柜台里的职员也好，还是那些进门来向他问这问那的客人也好，都是如此。他的皮鞋和衣领整洁齐正，梳着最时髦的发型，搽过油，一溜光滑，活象一位电影明星。克莱德一开头就被他那衣饰方面的审美情趣所完全倾倒了……一套特别精致讲究的棕色衣帽，同时还配上棕色的领带和短袜。 克莱德心里想，他自己也应该穿上那样一件配上棕色腰带的外套。他应该有一顶棕色帽子。而且还应该有一套缝制得那么精致。那么迷人的衣服。 首先向克莱德介绍本店工作概况的那个年轻人……赫格伦，同样对他产生了一种与别的侍应生所给予他的影响并非毫无联系，而又迥然不同的影响。赫格伦在侍应生中要算是年龄较大。经验较为丰富的一个，对其他侍应生的影响也比较大，因为他对自己酒店里本职工作以外的一切事情，都持乐乐呵呵。满不在乎的态度。赫格伦的教育程度和模样儿都不如其他小伙子，可是他具有强烈的贪婪和冲劲的脾性……加上他在花钱和玩乐时又慷慨大方，还有他的勇气。 体力和胆量，都是多伊尔。拉特勒或是金塞拉所望尘莫及……他的气力和胆量，有的时候几乎完全丧失了理性……这一切使克莱德对他特别感兴趣，特别着了迷。据他后来对克莱德说过，他父亲是个瑞典佬，烤面包师傅，好几年前，在泽西城把他母亲遗弃了，就让她听天由命去。因此，奥斯卡和他妹妹玛莎都没有受过很好基本教育，也没有结交过什么体面的朋友。他实在出于无奈，就在十四岁那年，搭上货车车皮离开了泽西城，打从那起，一直独自在外谋食。他也同克莱德一样，几乎丧心病狂似的急于投入自以为就在身边的一切欢乐的漩涡中去，并且准备进行任何探险活动，可是他却缺少克莱德所特有的那种害怕后果不堪设想的心理。此外，他还有一个朋友，名叫斯帕塞，年纪比他稍微大些，是给堪萨斯城里一个富翁开汽车的，有时偷偷地把车子开出来，捎上赫格伦到附近各处兜风去。这种交情，尽管说起来有悖常规，而且也不正大光明，可是赫格伦总觉得此人真是了不起，比周围这些人之中的某一些人有能耐得多;他给这个人的形象添上了一种在他们看来跟他们所感受到的实际情形大相径庭的光彩。 赫格伦不象多伊尔那样讨人喜欢，他要博得女人的青睐，也就不那么容易了。有些女人果然被他勾引住了，却远不是那么妖艳动人，可他对类似这样艳遇还是特别沾沾自喜，并且经常大肆吹嘘。克莱德由于缺乏经验，对赫格伦的话也就特别信服。因此，赫格伦几乎一开头就喜欢克莱德，觉得这个小青年也许是他的忠实听众了。 赫格伦看见克莱德时常紧挨自己身旁，坐在长条凳上，于是就继续点拨他。 开导他。只要你懂得怎样生活的话，堪萨斯城……就是个好地方。从前，他曾经在布法罗。克利夫兰。底特律。圣路易各大城市谋生过，不过，他对哪一个地方都没有什么好感，主要是……他当时不愿意说穿了的一个事实……因为他在那些地方都不如在这儿有奔头。他洗过碗，擦过汽车，做过管子工的助手，也还干过不少其他的活儿，后来，终于在布法罗干上了饭店这一行。随后，有一个也在饭店干活的年轻人(如今此人已不在这儿了)，奉劝他来堪萨斯城。可是，来到此地后又如何呢: ……"嘿，先说说这家酒店小费……可真不少，你上哪儿也得不到这么多，拿〔那〕我心里很明白。最主要的一点……是在这儿做事的人可好呀。你待大〔他〕们好，大〔他〕们也待你好。我上这儿已一年多了，我可没发过牢骚。斯夸尔斯拿〔那〕个小子挺不错，只要你不给他惹麻烦就得了。他这个人是铁面无情的，可他也得替他志〔自〕个儿着想……拿〔那〕是不用说的。可是，他从来都不是无缘无故把人开革掉的，拿〔那〕我也是很清楚的。至于说别的希〔事〕嘛，拿〔那〕也再简单都没有啦。你的活儿一干完，你的时间就归你自己的了。这儿的伙计们，都是好的，个个都是乐乐呵呵。大〔他〕们既不是吹牛大王，叶〔也〕不是大财迷。哪儿要是有什么……比方说，晚会呀，以及类似拿〔那〕样玩意儿……大〔他〕们就来了……差不离个个都来。要是希〔事〕儿不顺当，大〔他〕们既不唠唠叨叨，也不会哭鼻子。拿〔那〕个我心里都很清楚，意〔因〕为我跟大〔他〕们在一块待过，已有好多回了。"他给克莱德留下这样一个印象: 这些年轻小伙子，都是最好的朋友……也可以说是知己……只是多伊尔除外。其实，此人只是有点儿孤芳自赏，可也还说不上是自高自大。"追他的女人简直太多了，说穿了就这么回事。 "可有时候，他们哪儿都去玩，他们一块儿上舞厅，他们一块儿来到河边某个地方聚餐。赌钱，他们一块儿又到某个名叫"凯特。斯威尼"的寻欢作乐的场所……那儿有一些漂亮女人……以及诸如此类的地方。象这样一大堆信息，从来也没有灌进过克莱德的耳朵，如今却使他陷入沉思。梦想。怀疑。忧虑，乃至于扪心自问，真不知道从这一切之中能不能发现什么明智。魅力和乐趣，也不知道他自己能不能参予其间。因为他从自己生活中接受的教育，可不是这个样子呀! 此刻他洗耳恭听的所有这一切，既使他大喜过望，可又不免产生极大怀疑。 再说那个托马斯。拉特勒吧。乍一看，人们就会说，此人未必会伤害他人，从而成为冤家对头。他身高不过五英尺四英寸，胖乎乎的个儿，乌油油的头发，橄榄色的肌肤，眼睛象一泓碧水那么透亮，而且又是非常和蔼可亲。克莱德后来才知道，此人也是贫苦家庭出身，因此不论在社会地位和物质利益方面，他从来也没有得到过任何好处。不过，他自有办法，使这些年轻人个个喜欢他……简直喜欢到这样程度，就是说几乎每一件事都要跟他商量。他是威奇塔人，最近才迁居堪萨斯城。他母亲是个寡妇，主要依靠他和妹妹赡养。他们俩还处在幼年发育时期，就亲眼见过他们心爱的。秉性善良而又富于同情心的母亲遭到负心丈夫的摈斥和虐待。有时候他们连饭都吃不上。不止一次，他们因为付不出房租，都给撵了出去。汤姆和妹妹不论上哪一所公学，就读时间都长不了。 后来，到了十四岁的时候，他便偷偷出走，来到了堪萨斯城，干过各式各样的零活，最后才算踏进了格林－戴维逊这家大酒店;随后，他母亲和妹妹就从威奇塔迁居堪萨斯城，跟他住在一块儿。 不论是大酒店的奢华气派，或是他很快就混熟了的这些年轻人，克莱德固然印象很深，可是，克莱德觉得印象更深的，莫过于那有如大雨倾盆而下的零星外快……这些子儿扔在他右裤口袋里，早已积成一小堆了……有十美分银币，有镍币，有二十五美分银币，甚至还有半块美元银币。即使在头一天，这些零钱就在不断增加，到九点钟，他口袋里已有四块多钱;到十二点下班时，他已经有六块半钱了……等于他往昔一周间的进项。 得了这么多钱，他当时心里明白，只要给斯夸尔斯先生一块美元就得了……赫格伦关照过，不必多给。仅仅是一晚上有趣的……是的，愉快。迷人的工作，剩下来的五块半美元，就全归他自个儿的了。他简直不敢相信这是真的。说实话，这听起来很荒唐，好象在讲《一千零一夜》里阿拉丁的故事(《阿拉丁和神灯》是《一千零一夜》中一名篇，叙述主人公穷孩子阿拉丁终于找到了一盏神灯。由于神灯有求必应，阿拉丁因此一下子富了起来。)。可是，到了这第一天十二点正，不知哪儿锣声堂堂响……接下来是一阵脚步声，出现了三个年轻人……一个是来接替写字台跟前巴恩斯的，另两个是听候领班吩咐的。在巴恩斯一声令下，换班的八个人便站了起来，列队齐步往外走了。在过道外，解散以前，克莱德走到斯夸尔斯先生身旁，交给他一块银元。"那敢情好，"斯夸尔斯先生说了一声。别的就什么也没有说。随后，克莱德就跟众人一块，下了楼，来到自己的更衣柜，换好衣服，出了大门，走到了黑黝黝的大街上。一阵幸运的感觉，以及为了未来的幸运而意识到的责任感，使他惊喜若狂，以致浑身上下有些抖抖索索……甚至于头昏目眩了。 只消想一想: 如今他终于真的找到了这样的一个职位。也许每天他都挣得到这么多钱哩。他开始回家转，头一个念头就是要好好睡一觉，转天早上才能精神抖擞地上班去。继而一想，转天去酒店上班，可以迟至十一点半以前，于是，他就踅进一家通宵营业的经济小饭馆，喝一杯咖啡，吃了一点馅儿饼。这时，他心里一个劲儿想的，是第二天他只要从中午起一口气干到六点为止，打那以后，就可以一直歇到转天清晨六点。那时，他又可以挣到更多的钱，于是就有许许多多的钱，供他自个儿花了。

Part 1 Chapter 8 The thing that most interested Clyde at first was how, if at all, he was to keep the major portion of all this moneyhe was making for himself. For ever since he had been working and earning money, it had been assumed that hewould contribute a fair portion of all that he received--at least three-fourths of the smaller salaries he hadreceived up to this time--toward the upkeep of the home. But now, if he announced that he was receiving at leasttwenty-five dollars a week and more--and this entirely apart from the salary of fifteen a month and board--hisparents would assuredly expect him to pay ten or twelve. 　　But so long had he been haunted by the desire to make himself as attractive looking as any other well-dressedboy that, now that he had the opportunity, he could not resist the temptation to equip himself first and as speedilyas possible. Accordingly, he decided to say to his mother that all of the tips he received aggregated no more thana dollar a day. And, in order to give himself greater freedom of action in the matter of disposing of his sparetime, he announced that frequently, in addition to the long hours demanded of him every other day, he wasexpected to take the place of other boys who were sick or set to doing other things. And also, he explained thatthe management demanded of all boys that they look well outside as well as inside the hotel. He could not longbe seen coming to the hotel in the clothes that he now wore. Mr. Squires, he said, had hinted as much. But, as ifto soften the blow, one of the boys at the hotel had told him of a place where he could procure quite all the thingsthat he needed on time. 　　And so unsophisticated was his mother in these matters that she believed him. 　　But that was not all. He was now daily in contact with a type of youth who, because of his larger experience withthe world and with the luxuries and vices of such a life as this, had already been inducted into certain forms oflibertinism and vice even which up to this time were entirely foreign to Clyde's knowledge and set him agapewith wonder and at first with even a timorous distaste. Thus, as Hegglund had pointed out, a certain percentageof this group, of which Clyde was now one, made common cause in connection with quite regular adventureswhich usually followed their monthly pay night. These adventures, according to their moods and their cash at thetime, led them usually either to one of two rather famous and not too respectable all-night restaurants. In groups,as he gathered by degrees from hearing them talk, they were pleased to indulge in occasional late showy supperswith drinks, after which they were wont to go to either some flashy dance hall of the downtown section to pickup a girl, or that failing as a source of group interest, to visit some notorious--or as they would have deemed itreputed--brothel, very frequently camouflaged as a boarding house, where for much less than the amount of cashin their possession they could, as they often boasted, "have any girl in the house." And here, of course, becauseof their known youth, ignorance, liberality, and uniform geniality and good looks, they were made much of, as arule, being made most welcome by the various madames and girls of these places who sought, for commercialreasons of course, to interest them to come again. 　　And so starved had been Clyde's life up to this time and so eager was he for almost any form of pleasure, thatfrom the first he listened with all too eager ears to any account of anything that spelled adventure or pleasure. 　　Not that he approved of these types of adventures. As a matter of fact at first it offended and depressed him,seeing as he did that it ran counter to all he had heard and been told to believe these many years. Nevertheless sosharp a change and relief from the dreary and repressed work in which he had been brought up was it, that hecould not help thinking of all this with an itch for the variety and color it seemed to suggest. He listenedsympathetically and eagerly, even while at times he was mentally disapproving of what he heard. And seeinghim so sympathetic and genial, first one and then another of these youths made overtures to him to go here, thereor the other place--to a show, a restaurant, one of their homes, where a card game might be indulged in by two orthree of them, or even to one of the shameless houses, contact with which Clyde at first resolutely refused. Butby degrees, becoming familiar with Hegglund and Ratterer, both of whom he liked very much, and being invitedby them to a joy-night supper--a "blow-out" as they termed it, at Frissell's--he decided to go. 　　"There's going to be another one of our montly blow-outs to-morrow night, Clyde, around at Frissell's," Rattererhad said to him. "Don't you want to come along? You haven't been yet."By this time, Clyde, having acclimated himself to this caloric atmosphere, was by no means as dubious as he wasat first. For by now, in imitation of Doyle, whom he had studied most carefully and to great advantage, he hadoutfitted himself with a new brown suit, cap, overcoat, socks, stickpin and shoes as near like those of his mentoras possible. And the costume became him well--excellently well--so much so that he was far more attractive thanhe had ever been in his life, and now, not only his parents, but his younger brother and sister, were not a littleastonished and even amazed by the change. 　　How could Clyde have come by all this grandeur so speedily? How much could all this that he wore now havecost? Was he not hypothecating more of his future earnings for this temporary grandeur than was really wise? Hemight need it in the future. The other children needed things, too. And was the moral and spiritual atmosphere ofa place that made him work such long hours and kept him out so late every day, and for so little pay, just theplace to work? 　　To all of which, he had replied, rather artfully for him, that it was all for the best, he was not working too hard. 　　His clothes were not too fine, by any means--his mother should see some of the other boys. He was not spendingtoo much money. And, anyhow, he had a long while in which to pay for all he had bought. 　　But now, as to this supper. That was a different matter, even to him. How, he asked himself, in case the thinglasted until very late as was expected, could he explain to his mother and father his remaining out so very late. 　　Ratterer had said it might last until three or four, anyhow, although he might go, of course, any time, but howwould that look, deserting the crowd? And yet hang it all, most of them did not live at home as he did, or if theydid like Ratterer, they had parents who didn't mind what they did. Still, a late supper like that--was it wise? Allthese boys drank and thought nothing of it--Hegglund, Ratterer, Kinsella, Shiel. It must be silly for him to thinkthat there was so much danger in drinking a little, as they did on these occasions. On the other hand it was truethat he need not drink unless he wanted to. He could go, and if anything was said at home, he would say that hehad to work late. What difference did it make if he stayed out late once in a while? Wasn't he a man now? Wasn'the making more money than any one else in the family? And couldn't he begin to do as he pleased? 　　He began to sense the delight of personal freedom--to sniff the air of personal and delicious romance--and hewas not to be held back by any suggestion which his mother could now make.        如今克莱德最关心的是: 怎样把他挣来的钱大部分给自己积攒起来。因为从他一开始工作。挣钱起，家里就认为: 他会从他挣到的钱中拿出相当大的一部分……至少是过去他那份比较小的薪水的四分之三……来贴补家用。可是现在呢，他要是一说每星期至少可挣二十五块美元，甚至更多一些……而且每月薪水十五块美元和免费供膳还都不算在内……那末，他父母肯定指望他拿出十块或十二块美元来。 可是很久以来，他一直怀着一种愿望，想要把自己打扮得富有引诱力，就象任何一个衣冠楚楚的年轻人那样。如今他已有了这样的机会，他就经不住那种诱惑，首先要把自己打扮起来，而且还得越快越好。因此，他决定告知母亲，说他每日可得的小费，合起来才不过一块美元。为了个人得到更大自由。便于安排自己业余时间，他又说明，除了每隔一天要加一次班以外，经常还得给生病的或是另有任务的侍应生顶替上班。他还这样说，经理部要求所有侍应生即使在店外也要象在店里那样，穿戴得整整齐齐。他可不能老穿身上那套衣服去酒店上班。他说，这些事斯夸尔斯先生已向他暗示过了。不过，他又说，店里有一位侍应生，似乎要减轻他的压力，给他指点了一个地方，凡属他急需的一切东西，那儿通通都能马上买到。 他母亲对上面这类事简直一无所知，因此也就听信了他的话。 可问题还远不是这些呢。眼下他每天都要打交道的，就是这一类年轻人: 倘若同克莱德相比，他们由于阅世较深，与这种奢侈和邪恶的生活接触又多，早已沾染了某种淫荡。乃至于邪恶的习气，而克莱德对此至今还完全是门外汉，不由得为之目瞪口呆，开头甚至仍怀有羞怯的厌恶心理。比如，赫格伦就对他说过，这一拨人(如今克莱德也是其中一员了)里头，有相当一部分人，每月照例都要合伙纵酒狂欢一番，特别是在发月薪那天晚上。根据他们当时的兴致和手边有的现钱，通常他们总是在那两家相当有名气，可又不大高雅的通宵营业的酒家中任择其一。从他们的言谈中，克莱德逐渐获悉，他们喜欢结成一伙，常在深夜大吃大喝，然后照例到市中心那家不免有些俗丽的舞厅勾搭女人去。要是这一手勾不起大伙儿的兴致，他们干脆就奔那家名声颇臭……但他们却认为是遐迩驰名……的妓院(这种妓院往往都伪装成了寄宿舍)。正如他们常常吹嘘说，在那里，只要从他们手边的现钱中稍微拿出一些来，妓院里哪一个姑娘，都可以让你"随意挑选"。由于他们年轻无知，出手大方，而且个个长得相貌堂堂，和蔼可亲，照例备受欢迎。这些形形色色的妓院老板娘与女人，为了做生意起见，自然千方百计地吸引他们下次再度光临，所以也就特别殷勤周到招待他们。 截至目前为止，克莱德的生活一向枯燥乏味，同时，几乎对任何一种寻欢作乐的形式，他都跃跃欲试，因此，不拘是谁说起寻芳猎艳或则寻欢作乐的事，他一开头就侧耳细听，真是太过瘾了。这倒不是说他赞成这一类放浪形骸的行径。老实说，这种事一开头还让他感到恼火和苦闷，因为他认为那是跟他这么多年来所见所闻以及硬是要他接受的信仰大相径庭。然而，他自幼时起就在郁郁寡欢和备受压制的营生中长大的，现在这种变化和解脱与他的过去却形成了多么鲜明的对比! 这就使他在想到所有这一切的时候情不自禁地渴望着也能享受一下花式繁多和五光十色的生活乐趣。他对自己的听闻有时虽然心中颇不赞同，可是听的时候却露出热切和同情的神态。那些年轻人见他如此富于同情心。如此和蔼可亲，就争先恐后邀他到各处去玩……上剧院。去餐馆，或是到他们哪一位家里去，凑上两。三人打纸牌，甚至撺掇他到那些猥亵下流的场所去，开头克莱德是坚决不肯去那里的。不过，赫格伦和拉特勒这两个人，他是很喜欢的;后来他跟他们也都厮混熟了，因此，他们邀他到弗里塞尔酒家去吃"开心饭"……用他们的扯儿来说，就是大宴会……他就答应一准去。 "明儿晚上，我们上弗里塞尔吃每月一次的开心饭，克莱德，"拉特勒对他说。 "你也乐意去吗? 你一次还没去过呢? "这时候，克莱德早已迎合店里这种热乎乎的气氛，就不象自己原先那样迟疑不定了。他竭力仿效多伊尔(对于此人，他已仔细研究过，并且收获甚大)给自己置了一整套崭新服装，包括棕色衣帽。大衣。短袜。别针和皮鞋，尽量打扮得象那些点拨他的师傅。而且这一套服装对他很合适……非常合适……简直是太合适了，他一辈子还没有象此刻那样富有吸引力，不仅是他的父母，就连他的弟妹也因这一变化而深为惊讶，乃至于目瞪口呆了。 克莱德怎么会一下子就这样阔气起来呢? 他现在穿的这一整套衣饰要花多少钱呢? 难道说他居然会糊涂到这样地步，为了一时摆阔气，背了债花钱，就把将来的收入作抵押吗? 将来也许他还得要花钱啊。别的孩子们也需要置东西啊。这家饭店叫他干活，时间那么长，每天都是深夜才回来，工钱却又那么少，再看看那里的风气，对他来说是不是合适的地方呢? 所有这些问题，他回答得都很巧妙，说一切都会好起来的，而他在那里的工作也不太吃力。他的衣服压根儿也不算太漂亮……他母亲不妨看看别的侍应生就得了。他花的钱也不算太多。他买这些东西反正都是分期付款，以后可以慢慢地拨还。 不过，这个晚宴，连他自己都认为完全是另一回事。他心里在想，估计晚宴时间一定拖得很晚，就会使他迟迟不归，那他又该怎样向父母解释呢? 拉特勒说过，反正差不多要到半夜三。四点才散，不过嘛，他当然可以随便什么时候先走的。那末，好意思把大伙儿扔下，自个先走吗? 可是，他妈的，他们十之八九都不象他那样住在家里，即使说象拉特勒那样的人虽也在家里住，可他们所作所为，做父母的一点儿都不过问。不过话又说回来，赴类似那样迟至深夜的宴会……到底是不是明智之举呢? 这些小伙子……赫格伦。拉特勒。金塞拉。希尔……个个都喝酒，压根儿不把它当一回事。在这样场合他们照例都喝酒，只有他一人认为即便稍微呷上一口就有很大危险性，他这种想法想必太傻了吧。 再说，他要是不想喝，自然也就用不着喝嘛。他先走好了，家里要是问他的话，就不妨推托说他的工作非得干到很晚不可。偶尔有一次回家晚些，这又算得上什么呢? 难道说现在他不是个成年人了吗? 难道说他挣的钱不是比家里随便哪一位还要多吗? 难道说自此以后他还不该爱怎么办就怎么办吗? 他开始体会到个人自由的快乐……亲自品尝品尝令人心醉神迷的浪漫史……如今母亲的任何警告，怎么也阻止不住他了。

Part 1 Chapter 9 And so the interesting dinner, with Clyde attending, came to pass. And it was partaken of at Frissell's, as Rattererhad said. And by now Clyde, having come to be on genial terms with all of these youths, was in the gayest ofmoods about it all. Think of his new state in life, anyhow. Only a few weeks ago he was all alone, not a boyfriend, scarcely a boy acquaintance in the world! And here he was, so soon after, going to this fine dinner withthis interesting group. 　　And true to the illusions of youth, the place appeared far more interesting than it really was. It was little morethan an excellent chop-house of the older American order. Its walls were hung thick with signed pictures ofactors and actresses, together with playbills of various periods. And because of the general excellence of thefood, to say nothing of the geniality of its present manager, it had become the hangout of passing actors,politicians, local business men, and after them, the generality of followers who are always drawn by that whichpresents something a little different to that with which they are familiar. 　　And these boys, having heard at one time and another from cab and taxi drivers that this was one of the bestplaces in town, fixed upon it for their monthly dinners. Single plates of anything cost from sixty cents to a dollar. 　　Coffee and tea were served in pots only. You could get anything you wanted to drink. To the left of the mainroom as you went in was a darker and low-ceilinged room with a fireplace, to which only men resorted and satand smoked, and read papers after dinner, and it was for this room that these youths reserved their greatestadmiration. Eating here, they somehow felt older, wiser, more important--real men of the world. And Rattererand Hegglund, to whom by now Clyde had become very much attached, as well as most of the others, weresatisfied that there was not another place in all Kansas City that was really as good. 　　And so this day, having drawn their pay at noon, and being off at six for the night, they gathered outside the hotelat the corner nearest the drug store at which Clyde had originally applied for work, and were off in a happy,noisy frame of mind--Hegglund, Ratterer, Paul Shiel, Davis Higby, another youth, Arthur Kinsella and Clyde. 　　"Didja hear de trick de guy from St. Louis pulled on the main office yesterday?" Hegglund inquired of the crowdgenerally, as they started walking. "Wires last Saturday from St. Louis for a parlor, bedroom and bat for himselfand wife, an' orders flowers put in de room. Jimmy, the key clerk, was just tellin' me. Den he comes on here andregisters himself an' his girl, see, as man and wife, an', gee, a peach of a lookin' girl, too--I saw 'em. Listen, youfellows, cantcha? Den, on Wednesday, after he's been here tree days and dey're beginnin' to wonder about him alittle--meals sent to de room and all dat--he comes down and says dat his wife's gotta go back to St. Louis, anddat he won't need no suite, just one room, and dat they can transfer his trunk and her bags to de new room untiltrain time for her. But de trunk ain't his at all, see, but hers. And she ain't goin', don't know nuttin about it. But heis. Den he beats it, see, and leaves her and de trunk in de room. And widout a bean, see? Now, dey're holdin' herand her trunk, an' she's cryin' and wirin' friends, and dere's hell to pay all around. Can ya beat dat? An' deflowers, too. Roses. An' six different meals in de room and drinks for him, too.""Sure, I know the one you mean," exclaimed Paul Shiel. "I took up some drinks myself. I felt there wassomething phony about that guy. He was too smooth and loud-talking. An' he only comes across with a dime atthat.""I remember him, too," exclaimed Ratterer. "He sent me down for all the Chicago papers Monday an' only giveme a dime. He looked like a bluff to me.""Well, dey fell for him up in front, all right." It was Hegglund talking. "An' now dey're tryin' to gouge it outa her. 　　Can you beat it?""She didn't look to me to be more than eighteen or twenty, if she's that old," put in Arthur Kinsella, who up tonow had said nothing. 　　"Did you see either of 'em, Clyde?" inquired Ratterer, who was inclined to favor and foster Clyde and includehim in everything. 　　"No" replied Clyde. "I must have missed those two. I don't remember seeing either of 'em.""Well, you missed seein' a bird when you missed that one. Tall, long black cut-a-way coat, wide, black derbypulled low over his eyes, pearl-gray spats, too. I thought he was an English duke or something at first, the way hewalked, and with a cane, too. All they gotta do is pull that English stuff, an' talk loud an' order everybody aboutan' they get by with it every time.""That's right," commented Davis Higby. "That's good stuff, that English line. I wouldn't mind pulling some of itmyself sometime."They had now turned two corners, crossed two different streets and, in group formation, were making their way through the main door of Frissell's, which gave in on the reflection of lights upon china and silverware and faces,and the buzz and clatter of a dinner crowd. Clyde was enormously impressed. Never before, apart from theGreen-Davidson, had he been in such a place. And with such wise, experienced youths. 　　They made their way to a group of tables which faced a leather wall-seat. The head-waiter, recognizing Rattererand Hegglund and Kinsella as old patrons, had two tables put together and butter and bread and glasses brought. 　　About these they arranged themselves, Clyde with Ratterer and Higby occupying the wall seat; Hegglund,Kinsella and Shiel sitting opposite. 　　"Now, me for a good old Manhattan, to begin wit'," exclaimed Hegglund avidly, looking about on the crowd inthe room and feeling that now indeed he was a person. Of a reddish-tan hue, his eyes keen and blue, his reddish-brown hair brushed straight up from his forehead, he seemed not unlike a large and overzealous rooster. 　　And similarly, Arthur Kinsella, once he was in here, seemed to perk up and take heart of his present glory. In asort of ostentatious way, he drew back his coat sleeves, seized a bill of fare, and scanning the drink-list on theback, exclaimed: "Well, a dry Martini is good enough for a start.""Well, I'm going to begin with a Scotch and soda," observed Paul Shiel, solemnly, examining at the same timethe meat orders. 　　"None of your cocktails for me to-night," insisted Ratterer, genially, but with a note of reserve in his voice. "Isaid I wasn t going to drink much to-night, and I'm not. I think a glass of Rhine wine and seltzer will be about myspeed.""For de love o' Mike, will you listen to dat, now," exclaimed Hegglund, deprecatingly. "He's goin' to begin onRhine wine. And him dat likes Manhattans always. What's gettin' into you all of a sudden, Tommy? I t'ought yousaid you wanted a good time to- night.""So I do," replied Ratterer, "but can't I have a good time without lappin' up everything in the place? I want to staysober to-night. No more call-downs for me in the morning, if I know what I'm about. I came pretty near notshowing up last time.""That's true, too," exclaimed Arthur Kinsella. "I don't want to drink so much I don't know where I'm at, but I'mnot going to begin worrying about it now.""How about you, Higby?" Hegglund now called to the round-eyed youth. 　　"I'm having a Manhattan, too," he replied, and then, looking up at the waiter who was beside him, added, "How'stricks, Dennis?""Oh, I can't complain," replied the waiter. "They're breakin' all right for me these days. How's everything over tothe hotel?""Fine, fine," replied Higby, cheerfully, studying the bill-of-fare. 　　"An' you, Griffiths? What are you goin' to have?" called Hegglund, for, as master-of-ceremonies, delegated bythe others to look after the orders and pay the bill and tip the waiter, he was now fulfilling the role. 　　"Who, me? Oh, me," exclaimed Clyde, not a little disturbed by this inquiry, for up to now--this very hour, infact--he had never touched anything stronger than coffee or ice-cream soda. He had been not a little taken backby the brisk and sophisticated way in which these youths ordered cocktails and whisky. Surely he could not go sofar as that, and yet, so well had he known long before this, from the conversation of these youths, that on suchoccasions as this they did drink, that he did not see how he could very well hold back. What would they think ofhim if he didn't drink something? For ever since he had been among them, he had been trying to appear as muchof a man of the world as they were. And yet back of him, as he could plainly feel, lay all of the years in which hehad been drilled in the "horrors" of drink and evil companionship. And even though in his heart this long whilehe had secretly rebelled against nearly all the texts and maxims to which his parents were always alluding,deeply resenting really as worthless and pointless the ragamuffin crew of wasters and failures whom they werealways seeking to save, still, now he was inclined to think and hesitate. Should he or should he not drink? 　　For the fraction of an instant only, while all these things in him now spoke, he hesitated, then added: "Why, I,oh--I think I'll take Rhine wine and seltzer, too." It was the easiest and safest thing to say, as he saw it. Alreadythe rather temperate and even innocuous character of Rhine wine and seltzer had been emphasized by Hegglundand all the others. And yet Ratterer was taking it--a thing which made his choice less conspicuous and, as he felt,less ridiculous. 　　"Will you listen to dis now?" exclaimed Hegglund, dramatically. "He says he'll have Rhine wine and seltzer, too. 　　I see where dis party breaks up at half-past eight, all right, unless some of de rest of us do someting."And Davis Higby, who was far more trenchant and roistering than his pleasant exterior gave any indication of,turned to Ratterer and said: "Whatja want to start this Rhine wine and seltzer stuff for, so soon, Tom? Dontchawant us to have any fun at all to-night?""Well, I told you why," said Ratterer. "Besides, the last time I went down to that joint I had forty bucks when Iwent in and not a cent when I came out. I want to know what's goin' on this time.""That joint," thought Clyde on hearing it. Then, after this supper, when they had all drunk and eaten enough, theywere going down to one of those places called a "joint"--a bad-house, really. There was no doubt of it--he knewwhat the word meant. There would be women there--bad women--evil women. And he would be expected-couldhe--would he? 　　For the first time in his life now, he found himself confronted by a choice as to his desire for the more accurateknowledge of the one great fascinating mystery that had for so long confronted and fascinated and baffled andyet frightened him a little. For, despite all his many thoughts in regard to all this and women in general, he hadnever been in contact with any one of them in this way. And now--now-All of a sudden he felt faint thrills of hot and cold racing up and down his back and all over him. His hands andface grew hot and then became moist--then his cheeks and forehead flamed. He could feel them. Strange, swift, enticing and yet disturbing thoughts raced in and out of his consciousness. His hair tingled and he saw pictures-bacchanalianscenes--which swiftly, and yet in vain, he sought to put out of his mind. They would keep comingback. And he wanted them to come back. Yet he did not. And through it all he was now a little afraid. Pshaw! 　　Had he no courage at all? These other fellows were not disturbed by the prospects of what was before them. 　　They were very gay. They were already beginning to laugh and kid one another in regard to certain funny thingsthat had happened the last time they were all out together. But what would his mother think if she knew? Hismother! He dared not think of his mother or his father either at this time, and put them both resolutely out of hismind. 　　"Oh, say, Kinsella," called Higby. "Do you remember that little red head in that Pacific Street joint that wantedyou to run away to Chicago with her?""Do I?" replied the amused Kinsella, taking up the Martini that was just then served him. "She even wanted meto quit the hotel game and let her start me in a business of some kind. 'I wouldn't need to work at all if I stuck byher,' she told me.""Oh, no, you wouldn't need to work at all, except one way," called Ratterer. 　　The waiter put down Clyde's glass of Rhine wine and seltzer beside him and, interested and intense and troubledand fascinated by all that he heard, he picked it up, tasted it and, finding it mild and rather pleasing, drank it alldown at once. And yet so wrought up were his thoughts that he scarcely realized then that he had drunk it. 　　"Good for you," observed Kinsella, in a most cordial tone. "You must like that stuff.""Oh, it's not so bad," said Clyde. 　　And Hegglund, seeing how swiftly it had gone, and feeling that Clyde, new to this world and green, needed to becheered and strengthened, called to the waiter: "Here Jerry! One more of these, and make it a big one," hewhispered behind his hand. 　　And so the dinner proceeded. And it was nearly eleven before they had exhausted the various matters of interestto them--stories of past affairs, past jobs, past feats of daring. And by then Clyde had had considerable time tomeditate on all of these youths--and he was inclined to think that he was not nearly as green as they thought, or ifso, at least shrewder than most of them--of a better mentality, really. For who were they and what were theirambitions? Hegglund, as he could see, was vain and noisy and foolish--a person who could be taken in andconciliated by a little flattery. And Higby and Kinsella, interesting and attractive boys both, were still vain ofthings he could not be proud of--Higby of knowing a little something about automobiles--he had an uncle in thebusiness--Kinsella of gambling, rolling dice even. And as for Ratterer and Shiel, he could see and had noticed forsome time, that they were content with the bell-hop business--just continuing in that and nothing more--a thingwhich he could not believe, even now, would interest him forever. 　　At the same time, being confronted by this problem of how soon they would be wanting to go to a place intowhich he had never ventured before, and to be doing things which he had never let himself think he would do injust this way, he was just a little disturbed. Had he not better excuse himself after they got outside, or perhaps, after starting along with them in whatsoever direction they chose to go, quietly slip away at some corner andreturn to his own home? For had he not already heard that the most dreadful of diseases were occasionallycontracted in just such places--and that men died miserable deaths later because of low vices begun in thisfashion? He could hear his mother lecturing concerning all this--yet with scarcely any direct knowledge of anykind. And yet, as an argument per contra, here were all of these boys in nowise disturbed by what was in theirminds or moods to do. On the contrary, they were very gay over it all and amused--nothing more. 　　In fact, Ratterer, who was really very fond of Clyde by now, more because of the way he looked and inquiredand listened than because of anything Clyde did or said, kept nudging him with his elbow now and then, askinglaughingly, "How about it, Clyde? Going to be initiated to-night?" and then smiling broadly. Or finding Clydequite still and thinking at times, "They won't do more than bite you, Clyde."And Hegglund, taking his cue from Ratterer and occasionally desisting from his own self-glorifying diatribes,would add: "You won't ever be de same, Clyde. Dey never are. But we'll all be wid you in case of trouble."And Clyde, nervous and irritated, would retort: "Ah, cut it out, you two. Quit kidding. What's the use of trying tomake out that you know so much more than I do?"And Ratterer would signal Hegglund with his eyes to let up and would occasionally whisper to Clyde: "That's allright, old man, don't get sore. You know we were just fooling, that's all." And Clyde, very much drawn toRatterer, would relent and wish he were not so foolish as to show what he actually was thinking about. 　　At last, however, by eleven o'clock, they had had their fill of conversation and food and drink and were ready todepart, Hegglund leading the way. And instead of the vulgar and secretive mission producing a kind of solemnityand mental or moral self-examination and self-flagellation, they laughed and talked as though there was nothingbut a delicious form of amusement before them. Indeed, much to Clyde's disgust and amazement, they nowbegan to reminisce concerning other ventures into this world--of one particular one which seemed to amuse themall greatly, and which seemed to concern some "joint," as they called it, which they had once visited--a placecalled "Bettina's." They had been led there originally by a certain wild youth by the name of "Pinky" Jones of thestaff of another local hotel. And this boy and one other by the name of Birmingham, together with Hegglund,who had become wildly intoxicated, had there indulged in wild pranks which all but led to their arrest--prankswhich to Clyde, as he listened to them, seemed scarcely possible to boys of this caliber and cleanly appearance-pranksso crude and disgusting as to sicken him a little. 　　"Oh, ho, and de pitcher of water de girl on de second floor doused on me as I went out," called Hegglund,laughing heartily. 　　"And the big fat guy on the second floor that came to the door to see. Remember?" laughed Kinsella. "Hethought there was a fire or a riot, I bet.""And you and that little fat girl, Piggy. 'Member, Ratterer?" squealed Shiel, laughing and choking as he tried totell of it. 　　"And Ratterer's legs all bent under his load. Yoo-hoo!" yelled Hegglund. "And de way de two of 'em finally slid down de steps.""That was all your fault, Hegglund," called Higby from Kinsella's side. "If you hadn't tried that switching stuffwe never woulda got put out.""I tell you I was drunk," protested Ratterer. "It was the red-eye they sold in there.""And that long, thin guy from Texas with the big mustache, will you ever forget him, an' the way he laughed?"added Kinsella. "He wouldn't help nobody 'gainst us. 'Member?""It's a wonder we weren't all thrown in the street or locked up. Oh, gee, what a night!" reminisced Ratterer. 　　By now Clyde was faintly dizzy with the nature of these revelations. "Switchin'." That could mean but one thing. 　　And they expected him to share in revels such as these, maybe. It could not be. He was not that sort of person. 　　What would his mother and father think if they were to hear of such dreadful things? And yet-Even as they talked, they had reached a certain house in a dark and rather wide street, the curbs of which for ablock or more on either side were sprinkled with cabs and cars. And at the corner, only a little distance away,were some young men standing and talking. And over the way, more men. And not a half a block farther on, theypassed two policemen, idling and conversing. And although there was no light visible in any window, nor overany transom, still, curiously, there was a sense of vivid, radiant life. One could feel it in this dark street. Taxisspun and honked and two old-time closed carriages still in use rolled here and there, their curtains drawn. Anddoors slammed or opened and closed. And now and then a segment of bright inward light pierced the outwardgloom and then disappeared again. Overhead on this night were many stars. 　　Finally, without any comment from any one, Hegglund, accompanied by Higby and Shiel, marched up the stepsof this house and rang the bell. Almost instantly the door was opened by a black girl in a red dress. "Goodevening. Walk right in, won't you?" was the affable greeting, and the six, having pushed past her and through thecurtains of heavy velvet, which separated this small area from the main chambers, Clyde found himself in abright and rather gaudy general parlor or reception room, the walls of which were ornamented with gilt-framedpictures of nude or semi-nude girls and some very high pier mirrors. And the floor was covered by a bright redthick carpet, over which were strewn many gilt chairs. At the back, before some very bright red hangings, was agilded upright piano. But of guests or inmates there seemed to be none, other than the black girl. 　　"Jest be seated, won't you? Make yourselves at home. I'll call the madam." And, running upstairs to the left, shebegan calling: "Oh, Marie! Sadie! Caroline! They is some young gentlemen in the parlor."And at that moment, from a door in the rear, there emerged a tall, slim and rather pale-faced woman of aboutthirty-eight or forty--very erect, very executive, very intelligent and graceful-looking--diaphanously and yetmodestly garbed, who said, with a rather wan and yet encouraging smile: "Oh, hello, Oscar, it's you, is it? Andyou too, Paul. Hello! Hello, Davis! Just make yourselves at home anywhere, all of you. Fannie will be in in aminute. She'll bring you something to drink. I've just hired a new pianist from St. Joe--a Negro. Wait'll you hearhim. He's awfully clever."She returned to the rear and called, "Oh, Sam!"As she did so, nine girls of varying ages and looks, but none apparently over twenty-four or five--came troopingdown the stairs at one side in the rear, and garbed as Clyde had never seen any women dressed anywhere. Andthey were all laughing and talking as they came--evidently very well pleased with themselves and in nowiseashamed of their appearance, which in some instances was quite extraordinary, as Clyde saw it, their costumesranging from the gayest and flimsiest of boudoir negligees to the somewhat more sober, if no less revealing,dancing and ballroom gowns. And they were of such varied types and sizes and complexions--slim and stout andmedium--tall or short--and dark or light or betwixt. And, whatever their ages, all seemed young. And they smiledso warmly and enthusiastically. 　　"Oh, hello, sweetheart! How are you? Don't you want to dance with me?" or "Wouldn't you like something todrink?"        于是，有克莱德参加的那个有趣的宴会，正如拉特勒所说的，就假座弗里塞尔酒家举行了。克莱德跟这些年轻人早就谈得很合辙儿，所以，他心里简直高兴到了极点。反正他的新生活已经来到了。仅仅一两个星期以前，他还是孤零零的，没有一个朋友，在年轻人中几乎连一个熟人也都没有! 想不到没有多久，此刻他却跟这有趣的一伙人共进晚餐了。 这个酒家由于反映了年轻人的幻想，看起来要比它的实际情况耐人寻味得多。其实，它只不过是一个地地道道的老式美国小酒店罢了。四壁挂满了男女演员的签名照片，以及各个时期的戏剧海报。由于这里菜肴烹调特别味美可口……更不用说那位笑容可掬的现任经理……这家小酒店便成了过往的演员。 政客，以及当地商贾云集之地。此外，还有尾随他们之后的普通顾客，这些人只要一发现哪儿有新玩意儿，即使跟他们一向熟悉的稍微有点儿不一样，也常常被吸引过来了。 这些侍应生不止一次地听马车夫和出租司机说过，弗里塞尔酒家……是本城最好的馆子之一，因此，他们每月一次的聚餐会也就安排在这里了。每盘菜品价格从六十美分到一块美元。咖啡和茶都是整壶端上来。你乐意喝什么就有什么。一进门，就在大餐厅左侧，有一个光线较暗。天花板较低。带有壁炉的房间，通常只有男客人饭后来到这儿歇一歇，坐一坐，抽抽烟，看看报。而使这些来自格林－戴维逊大酒店的年轻人最艳羡不已的正是这个房间。他们在这里欢宴，不知怎的觉得自己老成持重，见多识广，格外神气，从而成为……真正见过世面的人了。拉特勒和赫格伦(现在克莱德非常爱慕他们)和其他大多数人都很满意，认为整个堪萨斯城再也没有比它更好的馆子了。 这一天，他们中午领了薪水，下午六点下了班，就在酒店外拐角处，紧挨着克莱德当初上门求职的杂货店的地方集合，然后欢欢喜喜。热热闹闹地一块儿出发了……有赫格伦。拉特勒。保罗。希尔。戴维斯。希格比(此人也是本店年轻的侍应生)。阿瑟。金塞拉以及克莱德。 "圣路易来的拿〔那〕个家伙，昨儿个跟总帐房开了个大玩笑，也〔你〕们听说过没有? "他们才上路，赫格伦就马上冲大伙儿问道。"上星期六，他从圣路易打来了电报，是给大〔他〕们夫妇俩预订一整套房间，包括一个客厅。一间卧室。一个学〔浴〕室，而且关照房间里还要摆上鲜花。是管钥匙的师傅吉米刚才告诉我的。而〔后〕来，他果然来了，登记的时候，他说他本人和他的年轻小姑娘是夫妻两口子，嘿，拿〔那〕个小妞儿，也真的够好看哩……我亲眼看到大〔他〕们的。喂，伙计们，也〔你〕们也听着，好不好? 而〔后〕来，到了星期三，也就是说，他在这儿已住了三天了，大〔他〕们开始对他有一点儿怀疑……要知道他的一日几餐都要送到房间里，还有这样拿〔那〕样的事……而〔后〕来，他下楼到了帐房间，说他太太药〔要〕去圣路易，所以，他用不着拿〔那〕一整套房间，次药〔只要〕一个单间就得了。还说在她上火车以前，要把他的箱子和她的手提包通通搬进新开的单间去。可是拿〔那〕只箱子压根儿不是他的，也〔你〕们明白吗，偏巧就是她的。她呢压根儿就没有九〔走〕，她对这希〔事〕一点儿都不知道。反正药九〔要走〕的……是他。而〔后〕来，他急匆匆溜九〔走〕了，明白吗，却把她和她的箱子全甩在房间里，而且连一个子儿也美〔没〕留下，也〔你〕们明白吗? 于是，大〔他〕们把她和她的箱子全个〔扣〕下来，她呀又是哭，又是久〔叫〕，给朋友们打电报，还得把钱付清才行。也〔你〕们见过这样的事吗? 还有那些鲜花，都是玫瑰花啊。再说房间里开过六顿饭，他还喝过酒，通通都得付钱。""是呀，你说的那个人，我也知道，"保罗。希尔大声嚷了起来。"我就上楼给他送过酒呢。我觉得这家伙身上有点儿假。他这个人太圆滑，说话嗓门又太大。而且他给的小费只有十个美分。""我也想起他来了，"拉特勒大声喊道。"那天，他叫我下去，把所有星期一的芝加哥报纸都买来，才给了我十个美分，我一下子看出他好象是个骗子手。 ""可不是，大〔他〕们真的上他老当啦。"这是赫格伦在说话。"现在大〔他〕们一个劲儿想从她身上把钱抠捉〔出〕来。也〔你〕们见过这种希〔事〕没有? ""我看她才十八岁……最多也不过二十，"直到此刻，一气不吭的阿瑟。金塞拉插进来说了一句。 "喂，克莱德，他们这两个人，你见过没有? "拉特勒问道。对于克莱德，他一向热心照顾，此刻竭力鼓励克莱德说说话。 "没有呐，"克莱德回答说。"这两位我准是错过了。我已想不起见过哪一位了。""噢哟哟，你错过了这一个，就等于是……错过了一个头等人物: 高高的个儿，身穿黑色常礼服，头戴圆顶宽边黑礼帽，低低地拉到眼边，脚上还套着淡灰色鞋罩。开头，我还以为他是一个英国公爵什么的，瞧他走路的神气，手里还拄着拐杖，真帅。这种人只要一摆出英国佬这套派头，说话时嗓门儿又大，净向周围每一个人发号施令，包管每回都能蒙混过去。""说得对，"戴维斯。希格比发表了自己意见。"那种英国派头……这玩意儿可真不赖。有的时候，我觉得也不妨拿过来，给自己装装场面。"他们一行人已经拐了两个弯，走过两条街，排成一字形，迈进了弗里塞尔酒家的大门，见到灯光下闪闪发亮的细瓷杯碟，银质餐具和各种面孔，还听见席间一片嘈杂的谈笑声。杯盘碰击声。这使克莱德大为感动。除了格林－戴维逊大酒店以外，他从来没有到过这么闹哄哄的地方。而且又是跟这些见多识广。 经验丰富的年轻人一块儿来的。 他们径直走到沿墙根配备皮椅的一排桌子跟前。侍者领班一见拉特勒。赫格伦。金塞拉几位老主顾，索性把两张桌子拼在一块，黄油。面包和玻璃杯一一端上来。他们就围着桌子依次入座，克莱德和拉特勒。希格比靠墙坐，赫格伦。金塞拉和希尔则坐在对面。 "得了吧，我希〔先〕来一杯高级的曼哈顿鸡尾酒，"赫格伦好象有点儿馋涎似地大声嚷嚷说，同时又举目四顾，觉得这会儿他真的成了一个了不起的人物。 他的肌肤是淡红略带褐色;一双碧蓝眼睛很机灵;他那淡红略带棕色的头发竖立在前额，一眼望去，有点儿象一头昂首高吭的大公鸡。 阿瑟。金塞拉一到这里，如同克莱德一样，仿佛一下子快活起来，并且由于眼前这一盛举，好象心情格外舒畅。他煞有介事地把衣袖往上捋一捋，抓起一份菜单，了一下后面开列的各种酒名，大声嚷道: "好吧，先来味儿淡一些的马丁尼鸡尾酒，倒是更配我的胃口。""得了，给我先来一点儿兑汽水的威士忌，"保罗。希尔一本正经地说，同时仔细看着肉类的菜单。 "今儿晚上，我才不喝你们的鸡尾酒，"拉特勒乐乐呵呵，而又很坚决地说着，不过听得出多少带一点儿矜持的语调。"我说过今儿晚上不想多喝，那就不多喝呗。我只想来一杯莱茵酒，兑上一些塞尔查矿泉水就够了。""我的老天哪，也〔你〕们听他胡诌拿〔那〕一套吗? "赫格伦深为不满地嚷了起来。"他要先喝莱茵酒。可他一向喜欢喝曼哈顿鸡尾酒。你怎么突然出了什么毛病，汤米? 我希〔记〕得你说过今儿晚上要玩个痛快呢。""现在我还是这么说，"拉特勒回答说，"可是不把这儿的酒通通喝完，难道就不能玩个痛快吗? 今儿晚上我要节制些，不打算喝醉。只要我脑子清醒，明儿早上就不会挨骂了。上一回，我差点儿上不了班。""这倒是实话，"阿瑟。金塞拉大声嚷道。"我也不想喝得太多了，弄得自己昏头昏脑的，不过这会儿就让我为这担心，不免为时太早。""你怎么样，希格比? "这时赫格伦又问那个眼睛滴溜滚圆的年轻人。 "我也要曼哈顿鸡尾酒，"他回答说，随后就昂起头来，瞅了一眼站在他身旁的侍者说，"运气怎么样，丹尼斯? ""哦，没得话说的，"侍者回答说。"这几天运气都不坏。酒店里怎么样? ""很好，很好，"希格比乐呵呵地说，一面在仔细看菜单。 "你呢，格里菲思? 你要喝什么? "赫格伦开口问，因为他是大伙儿推选出来的司仪，点菜。付帐。给小费，全归他负责，这会儿他是在履行自己职责。 "是谁，是我吗? 哦，哦……"克莱德大声嚷道;这一问让他感到有点儿不安，因为到现在为止……事实上就是说到此刻为止……比咖啡。冰淇淋汽水刺激性更强的东西，他从来还没有沾过唇边。这些年轻人点鸡尾酒和威士忌时那种活泼老练劲儿，不免使他大吃一惊。当然罗，他是决不会走得那么远的，不过，从这些年轻人的言谈之中，他早就知道: 他们在眼前这种场合确实喝酒的，因此，他很难想象自己怎能退缩不前。要是他什么也不喝，他们会对他有怎么个想法呢? 自从跟他们厮混在一起以后，他一直在试着要表现得象一个见过世面的人。 跟他们完全一个样。可是，他也清清楚楚地感觉到，这么多年以来自己总是不断地受到开导，说喝酒和跟坏人交朋友，该有多么"可怕"。虽然许久以来，他一直都在暗中反抗父母经常循循善诱的所有基督教《圣经》经文和箴言，对于他们始终在想尽办法去拯救的那些乌合之众……窝囊废和落伍者，也是历来嫉恶如仇，认为他们全是不值一提的垃圾。尽管如此，现在他还得要三思而行。他到底应不应该喝酒? 所有这些念头只是一瞬间在他心底汹涌而起，他稍微迟疑了一下，就接下去说: "怎么啦，我……哦……我说我也来一点莱茵酒，兑些塞尔查矿泉水吧。"依他看，这是最不费劲而又最稳妥的说法。赫格伦和所有其他的人都一个劲儿说过，兑上塞尔查矿泉水的莱茵酒，酒性温和，甚至没有任何害处。况且拉特勒也要喝这个呀……这样，他选定的这种酒就不算太显眼，而且在他看来，也不算太可笑了。 "你们听听他此〔这〕个吧? "赫格伦惹人注目地嚷了起来。"他说他也要兑矿泉水的莱茵酒。得了吧，我看还是请别位想想办法，要不然此〔这〕个晚宴到八点半可就散伙。"戴维斯。希格比，此人外表好似和善，实际上却十分尖酸刻薄，而又喜爱喧闹，这时侧过身来，向拉特勒示意说: "泥〔你〕一开头马上就要莱茵酒兑塞尔查矿泉水，到底嘛意思，汤姆? 泥〔你〕不让我们今儿晚上玩个痛快吗? ""哦，我不是已经向你们解释过了，"拉特勒说。"再说，上一回我上那个窝儿去，才进去的时候，身边还有四十块钱，等我出来的时候，连一个子儿也都没了。这一回，我自个儿可要留点神。""那个窝儿，"克莱德一听到这个扯儿，心中不由得暗自思忖起来。这么说来，晚宴以后，他们个个吃饱喝足了，就要去一个所谓"窝儿"的地方……准是一个下流场所。这是毫无疑问的……他知道"窝儿"这两个字包含什么意思。那里准定有女人……坏女人……邪恶的女人。那时要是他们指望他……能不能……难道说他也会……吗? 现在是他生平头一遭必须对自己以下这么一个渴望作出抉择的时候了。许久以来一直有一个令人心醉神迷的大秘密摆在他面前，使他神魂颠倒，而又困惑骇怕;而他总是如饥似渴地想要对它有一个更为确切的了解。尽管他对以上种种问题，以及普通妇女问题已经思考得很多，可是，他从来没有以现在这种方式跟哪一个女人接触过。而现在……现在……突然间，他觉得自己后背，乃至于全身上下，仿佛隐隐约约地一阵冷。一阵热。他的手和脚骤然发烧，随后分泌出湿粘粘的东西……于是，他的腮帮子和额角一下子都涨得火红一般。这些连他自己也都能感觉得到了。种种稀奇古怪。瞬息即逝。令人陶醉，而又困惑不安的思绪在他心中来回激荡。他浑身上下肌肤毛发末梢都在微微颤栗，他眼前浮现出一幅幅画面……都是些酗酒后纵欲胡闹的情景。尽管他马上就使劲想把它们从自己脑际驱赶出去，可是枉然徒劳: 这些情景还是不断地返回来。再说，他心里也巴不得它们返回来。可他又并不是巴不得那样。所有这一切……他经过反复思考，不免感到有点儿害怕。呸! 难道说他连一点儿胆量也都没有吗? 瞧别的小伙子，他们可都没有临阵感到困惑不安呀。他们心里正乐开了花呢。他们正说着他们上次一块去时闹过的一些洋相，大伙儿还逗着玩笑呢。可是万一他母亲知道了，又会怎么个想法? 他的母亲啊! 这会儿他既不敢想他的母亲，也不敢想他的父亲，于是就毅然决然地把他们从自己脑际撵了出去。 "喂，金塞拉，"希格比喊道。"太平洋街那个窝儿里……那个红头发小妞儿……要你跟她一块儿私奔到芝加哥，你总还记得吧? ""当然罗，我记得! "乐得笑哈哈的金塞拉回答说，一面喝着刚端来的马丁尼鸡尾酒。"她甚至还撺掇我离开酒店，干脆改行，而且，她还答应帮我做什么买卖来着。她还对我说，' ''''只要我厮守着她，什么事都不用我干。，""是啊，赶明儿你什么事都不用干，只干一件事就得了，"拉特勒大声说道。 这时，侍者已把克莱德要的一杯兑塞尔查矿泉水的莱茵酒端到他面前。所有这些话他听了很有劲儿，同时却感到紧张。困惑，而又着了迷，于是端起酒杯，呷了一口，觉得味儿还算温和，合口味，就一仰脖把它喝干了。只是由于他这时忧心忡忡，所以没有意识到自己酒已经喝干了。 "真是好样的，"金塞拉用最最热和的口吻说。"可见你喜欢这玩意儿。""是啊，还不坏，"克莱德回答说。 赫格伦看见他一仰脖把酒喝干，觉得对克莱德这种初出茅庐的黄口小儿，就得多鼓鼓气，于是招呼侍者: "喂，杰利! "他用手一遮低声轻语说，"这个再来一杯，要大杯的! "晚宴就这样继续进行。他们把各种各样有趣的话题……比方说，过去的男女私情。过去的行当，以及过去斗胆包天的种种勾当……都给讲完了。这时候，克莱德经过相当充分时间仔细琢磨过所有这些年轻人之后……他认为自己并不象他们所想象的那么幼稚;或者说即使幼稚的话，至少比他们里头绝大多数人要乖觉些……智力上也要聪明些。他们这拨人算什么? 他们有什么抱负? 依他看，赫格伦爱虚荣，吵吵闹闹，傻头傻脑……稍微恭维几句，一下子就能把他收买过来。至于希格比和金塞拉，这两个人都是有趣的漂亮小伙子，他们常常奚落克莱德外行而沾沾自喜……希格比稍微懂一点汽车，因为他有个叔叔做汽车生意……金塞拉是个赌徒，甚至因为会掷骰子而显得神气活现。再说拉特勒和希尔，克莱德老早就看清楚了，他们干上侍应生这一行，已是心满意足……只想一直干下去，别无他求……可是他呢，即使在眼前，也不相信侍应生这一行会让他永远感到兴趣。 同时，他心中又有一点儿忐忑不安地琢磨着一个问题: 他们多咱出发，到他从来没去过的地方，去干他过去连想都不让自己想的那些玩意儿。他想，是不是最好一出大门，自己先找个借口溜之大吉;还是开头跟着他们随大溜走一程，随后到某个拐角处偷偷回家转呢? 因为他早就听说过，有时候就是在这些地方得了一些最可怕的病……因为就是这样干过那些下流邪恶的勾当，人们最后不是都惨遭死亡吗? 所有这些问题母亲在传道时都讲到过，他虽然也听见了……但是，对此他并没有什么直接体会。不过，再看看这里的小伙子们，主意既定，谁都没有感到惴惴不安，这就足以驳倒上述说法了。而且相反，他们对这种事还那么兴高采烈。津津乐道……说穿了无非如此罢了。 说实在的，拉特勒现在很喜欢克莱德，更多的是因为克莱德观看。询问。 倾听时流露的那种神态，而不是因为他所做过哪些事，或是说过哪些话。拉特勒不时用胳膊肘轻轻地推推他，笑着问: "怎么样，克莱德? 今儿晚上该正式入门了吧? "说完脸上堆满笑容。有时，他看见克莱德闷声不响，心事重重，就说: "克莱德，别害怕，不会把你全吃掉的……最多不过咬你一口罢了。"本来赫格伦一直在自吹自擂，殊不知他一听到拉特勒这句暗示话，马上接过茬说: "你不会一辈子都是这样的，克莱德。拿〔哪〕一个都得变嘛。不过，万一碰上麻烦，我们全同你在一块儿，就得了。"克莱德这时心里既紧张。又有点恼火，于是顶嘴说: "喂，你们二位别胡扯了。 捉弄得也够了吧。你们拚命夸口你们懂的比我多得多，这有什么用处? "拉特勒就给赫格伦眨眨眼，暗示他不要再说了，随后对克莱德低声耳语说: "得了，伙计，别生气嘛。你也知道，我们只不过是开开玩笑罢了。"克莱德因为很喜欢拉特勒，心一下子就软下来，后悔太傻，泄露了自己的真实看法。 可是，最后到了十一点钟，他们早已吃饱。喝足。谈够了，就拔脚要走，由赫格伦领头，这一帮子出了大门。他们那种下流的诡秘行径，并没有促使他们严肃地思考一番，或是在心灵上。道德上引起自我反省，乃至于自我鞭笞，而是恰好相反，他们竟然有说有笑，仿佛等待他们的，只是一场美妙无穷的娱乐消遣似的。这时，他们还喜欢旧事重提，使克莱德听了既反感，而又惊讶……特别是扯到某一次寻花问柳的经历，似乎逗得他们个个心花怒放。说的是: 他们从前逛过一回他们叫做"窝儿"……名为"贝蒂娜公馆"的地方。原是在当地另一家旅馆里任职的。有个名叫"平基"(此处系英文译音，意谓"粉红色"。)。琼斯的浪荡子带领他们去的。此人和另一个名叫伯明翰的，还有这个发酒疯的赫格伦，在那儿恣意纵欲，大闹恶作剧，差点给抓了起来，克莱德听他们讲到这些恶作剧时，觉得从这些小伙子的素质和整洁的外表来看，似乎极不可能干出这等事来……可是，他们的恶作剧毕竟太粗野。太卑劣了，使他禁不住感到一阵恶心。 "你们记不记得，我跑出来的时候，二楼那个姑娘把一罐子水直往我身上泼呀，"赫格伦放声大笑，嚷了起来。 "还有二楼那个大胖子，赶到大门口来看热闹呢。你们还记得吧? "金塞拉笑眯眯地说。"我敢打赌，他心里想也许失火了，或是发生骚乱了。""还有你跟那个名叫' ''''皮吉，(此处系英文译音，意谓"小猪仔"。)的小胖姑娘儿。记得吧，拉特勒? "希尔一面尖叫着，拚命想要说下去，一面又哈哈大笑，连气都喘不过来。 "拉特勒喝得醉醺醺，两只脚都站不稳。哦……嗬! "赫格伦大吼一声。"后来他们两个一块儿从台阶上滚下来啊。""那全得怪你，赫格伦，"在金塞拉旁边的希格比说道。"要是你不耍' ''''软鞭子，那玩意儿，我们怎么也不会给人撵了出来。""老实说，我真的喝醉了，"拉特勒抗议说。"那全得怪他们那儿卖的蹩脚烈性威士忌。""那个身材瘦长。蓄着络腮胡子的得克萨斯人，你一辈子也忘不了吧? 瞧他格格大笑那副德行呀! "金塞拉又找补着说。"别的家伙反对我们，可他没有一块儿帮着出力，还记得吧? ""我们没有全给人撵到大街上，也没有给警察逮住，真是了不起。嘿，嘿，那天晚上多美! "拉特勒回忆说。 可是他们泄露的这些秘闻，使克莱德听后有点儿头昏目眩了。"软鞭子"! 那只不过是指其中一件事罢了。 他们也许指望他也会跟着他们一块儿胡闹取乐的。那可办不到。他可不是那种人。他的父母要是听说这些骇人听闻的事，又会作何感想呢? 可是……他们边说边走，不觉来到了一条幽暗而又相当宽敞的大街某一所房子跟前，有不少马车和汽车。三三两两地停放在沿着一个或一个以上街区马路两旁。离这儿不远的一个大街拐角处，有几个年轻人正伫立在那里谈天。对面还有更多的人。再过不到半个街区，他们看见两个警察在闲扯淡。虽然哪个窗子里或是气窗里都没有透出灯光来，可是说来也真怪，依然让人感到一种栩栩如生。光彩夺目的生活气息。这一点就是在这条幽暗的大街上，也还是可以感觉到。出租汽车一个劲儿摁着喇叭，飞驰而过;两辆老式带篷马车不停地来来去去，车窗帘子拉得严严实实的。不时听到砰砰地大门响，一会儿关上，一会儿撞开，一会儿又关上了。屋子里一道亮光，有时穿透户外一片黑暗，可又倏忽不见了。 这天晚上，满天星星当空照。 后来，谁都是一言不语，赫格伦在希格比和希尔陪同下，走到了这所房子跟前，然后拾阶而上，按了一下门铃。眨眼间就有一个全身穿红的黑人小姑娘来开门，并且殷勤地招呼他们说: "晚上好。请，请，里进? ，于是，他们六个汉子一下子从她身边簇拥过去，穿过一道道隔开这一个小小的前厅和各个主要房间的天鹅绒厚帷帘。克莱德发现自己置身在一个灯火辉煌，但又相当俗气的大客厅(亦即会客室)里，墙壁上挂着不少镶着金边镜框的裸体和半裸体女人画像，还有好几面高高的窗间壁穿衣镜。客厅里铺上了鲜红的厚地毯，并且随便摆上许多镀金椅子。客厅后部，挂着一些令人炫目的红色帐幔，前面置放一架镀金竖式钢琴。不过，这里仿佛见不到什么客人或是住在同院的人……只有那个黑人小姑娘。 "各位请坐。别客气。我这就去叫太太。"说完，她就一溜小跑，往左直奔楼上，一个劲儿喊道: "哦，玛丽! 萨迪! 卡罗琳! 客厅里到了好几位年轻的先生。"这时候，客厅后部一扇门里，走出来一个脸色苍白。细高挑儿的女人，年纪在三十八到四十岁之间……身姿挺秀，举止文雅，聪明伶俐，但又好象喜欢发号施令，她穿着透明。素朴的衣服，露出淡淡的倦容，强作欢颜，说道: "哦，你好，奥斯卡，是你呀，是不是? 还有……你，保罗。你好! 你好! 戴维斯! 各位千万别客气。范妮一会儿就到。她会给各位端上一些喝的。我刚从圣乔请到一位新钢琴师……是个黑人。你们想听他弹吗? 他可弹得棒极了。"她一转身回到客厅后部，大声喊道: "喂，萨姆! "这时，有九个年龄和容貌各不相同的姑娘，从后部另一侧楼梯首尾相接，拾级而下……一望可知，她们中间没有一个年龄超过二十四。五岁以上的，她们身上的衣着打扮，克莱德从来没有看见别处的女人穿过。她们下楼的时候，个个都是有说有笑的……显然觉得自己非常得意洋洋，而且，对自己的模样儿一点也都不害羞。不过，在克莱德看来，她们有些人打扮得相当别致;她们的服装，从绣阁里最艳丽。薄如蝉翼的透明长睡衣，一直到虽然比较素淡。却也同样袒胸裸肩的舞会晚礼服，应有尽有。她们的体态。身段。容貌，各不相同……比方说，苗条的。丰腴的，或适可而止的……体型有高个儿，也有矮个儿……有浅黑的。白嫩的，或则介于二者之间适中的肤色。不论岁数大小，看起来她们都很年轻。而且，她们一笑起来，又是那么亲昵。那么迷人。 "哦，你好，我的心肝宝贝呀! 你好? 要跟我跳舞吗? "或是说，"你要喝点什么吗?"

[Part 1 Chapter 10 Prepared as Clyde was to dislike all this, so steeped had he been in the moods and maxims antipathetic toanything of its kind, still so innately sensual and romantic was his own disposition and so starved where sex wasconcerned, that instead of being sickened, he was quite fascinated. The very fleshly sumptuousness of most ofthese figures, dull and unromantic as might be the brains that directed them, interested him for the time being. 　　After all, here was beauty of a gross, fleshly character, revealed and purchasable. And there were no difficultiesof mood or inhibitions to overcome in connection with any of these girls. One of them, a quite pretty brunette ina black and red costume with a band of red ribbon across her forehead, seemed to be decidedly at home withHigby, for already she was dancing with him in the back room to a jazz melody most irrationally hammered outupon the piano. 　　And Ratterer, to Clyde's surprise, was already seated upon one of the gilt chairs and upon his knees was lounginga tall young girl with very light hair and blue eyes. And she was smoking a cigarette and tapping her goldslippers to the melody of the piano. It was really quite an amazing and Aladdin-like scene to him. And here wasHegglund, before whom was standing a German or Scandinavian type, plump and pretty, her arms akimbo andher feet wide apart. And she was asking--with an upward swell of the voice, as Clyde could hear: "You makelove to me to-night?" But Hegglund, apparently not very much taken with these overtures, calmly shook hishead, after which she went on to Kinsella. 　　And even as he was looking and thinking, a quite attractive blonde girl of not less than twenty-four, but whoseemed younger to Clyde, drew up a chair beside him and seating herself, said: "Don't you dance?" He shook hishead nervously. "Want me to show you?""Oh, I wouldn't want to try here," he said. 　　"Oh, it's easy," she continued. "Come on!" But since he would not, though he was rather pleased with her for being agreeable to him, she added: "Well, how about something to drink then?""Sure," he agreed, gallantly, and forthwith she signaled the young Negress who had returned as waitress, and in amoment a small table was put before them and a bottle of whisky with soda on the side--a sight that soastonished and troubled Clyde that he could scarcely speak. He had forty dollars in his pocket, and the cost ofdrinks here, as he had heard from the others, would not be less than two dollars each, but even so, think of himbuying drinks for such a woman at such a price! And his mother and sisters and brother at home with scarcelythe means to make ends meet. And yet he bought and paid for several, feeling all the while that he had let himselfin for a terrifying bit of extravagance, if not an orgy, but now that he was here, he must go through with it. 　　And besides, as he now saw, this girl was really pretty. She had on a Delft blue evening gown of velvet, withslippers and stockings to match. In her ears were blue earrings and her neck and shoulders and arms were plumpand smooth. The most disturbing thing about her was that her bodice was cut very low--he dared scarcely look ather there--and her cheeks and lips were painted-- most assuredly the marks of the scarlet woman. Yet she did notseem very aggressive, in fact quite human, and she kept looking rather interestedly at his deep and dark andnervous eyes. 　　"You work over at the Green-Davidson, too, don't you?" she asked. 　　"Yes," replied Clyde trying to appear as if all this were not new to him--as if he had often been in just such aplace as this, amid such scenes. "How did you know?""Oh, I know Oscar Hegglund," she replied. "He comes around here once in a while. Is he a friend of yours?""Yes. That is, he works over at the hotel with me.""But you haven't been here before.""No," said Clyde, swiftly, and yet with a trace of inquiry in his own mood. Why should she say he hadn't beenhere before? 　　"I thought you hadn't. I've seen most of these other boys before, but I never saw you. You haven't been workingover at the hotel very long, have you?""No," said Clyde, a little irritated by this, his eyebrows and the skin of his forehead rising and falling as hetalked--a form of contraction and expansion that went on involuntarily whenever he was nervous or thoughtdeeply. "What of it?""Oh, nothing. I just knew you hadn't. You don't look very much like these other boys--you look different." Shesmiled oddly and rather ingratiatingly, a smile and a mood which Clyde failed to interpret. 　　"How different?" he inquired, solemnly and contentiously, taking up a glass and drinking from it. 　　"I'll bet you one thing," she went on, ignoring his inquiry entirely. "You don't care for girls like me very much, do you?""Oh, yes, I do, too," he said, evasively. 　　"Oh, no, you don't either. I can tell. But I like you just the same. I like your eyes. You're not like those otherfellows. You're more refined, kinda. I can tell. You don't look like them.""Oh, I don't know," replied Clyde, very much pleased and flattered, his forehead wrinkling and clearing asbefore. This girl was certainly not as bad as he thought, maybe. She was more intelligent--a little more refinedthan the others. Her costume was not so gross. And she hadn't thrown herself upon him as had these others uponHegglund, Higby, Kinsella and Ratterer. Nearly all of the group by now were seated upon chairs or divans aboutthe room and upon their knees were girls. And in front of every couple was a little table with a bottle of whiskyupon it. 　　"Look who's drinking whisky!" called Kinsella to such of the others as would pay any attention to him, glancingin Clyde's direction. 　　"Well, you needn't be afraid of me," went on the girl, while Clyde glanced at her arms and neck, at her too muchrevealed bosom, which quite chilled and yet enticed him. "I haven't been so very long in this business. And Iwouldn't be here now if it hadn't been for all the bad luck I've had. I'd rather live at home with my family if Icould, only they wouldn't have me, now." She looked rather solemnly at the floor, thinking mainly of the littleinexperienced dunce Clyde was--so raw and green. Also of the money she had seen him take out of his pocket-plainlyquite a sum. Also how really good-looking he was, not handsome or vigorous, but pleasing. And he wasthinking at the instant of Esta, as to where she had gone or was now. What might have befallen her--who couldsay? What might have been done to her? Had this girl, by any chance, ever had any such unfortunate experienceas she had had? He felt a growing, if somewhat grandiose, sympathy, and looked at her as much as to say: "Youpoor thing." Yet for the moment he would not trust himself to say anything or make any further inquiries. 　　"You fellows who come into a place like this always think so hard of everybody. I know how you are. But we'renot as bad as you think."Clyde's brows knit and smoothed again. Perhaps she was not as bad as he thought. She was a low woman, nodoubt--evil but pretty. In fact, as he looked about the room from time to time, none of the girls appealed to himmore. And she thought him better than these other boys--more refined--she had detected that. The complimentstuck. Presently she was filling his glass for him and urging him to drink with her. Another group of young menarrived about then--and other girls coming out of the mysterious portals at the rear to greet them--Hegglund andRatterer and Kinsella and Higby, as he saw, mysteriously disappeared up that back stairs that was heavilycurtained from the general room. And as these others came in, this girl invited him to come and sit upon a divanin the back room where the lights were dimmer. 　　And now, seated here, she had drawn very close to him and touched his hands and finally linking an arm in hisand pressing close to him, inquired if he didn't want to see how pretty some of the rooms on the second floorwere furnished. And seeing that he was quite alone now--not one of all the group with whom he had comearound to observe him--and that this girl seemed to lean to him warmly and sympathetically, he allowed himself to be led up that curtained back stair and into a small pink and blue furnished room, while he kept saying tohimself that this was an outrageous and dangerous proceeding on his part, and that it might well end in miseryfor him. He might contract some dreadful disease. She might charge him more than he could afford. He wasafraid of her--himself--everything, really--quite nervous and almost dumb with his several fears and qualms. 　　And yet he went, and, the door locked behind him, this interestingly well-rounded and graceful Venus turned themoment they were within and held him to her, then calmly, and before a tall mirror which revealed her fully toherself and him, began to disrobe.        虽说克莱德过去一直虔心灵修，笃信《圣经》上箴言，与他此刻所见所闻都是水火不相容，理应表示深恶痛绝，可是，由于他天性那么喜好犬马声色。 罗曼蒂克，而且对于性问题又是那么饥渴难忍，所以现在，他不是感到厌恶，倒是反而着了迷。这些姑娘几乎个个体态丰腴，富于肉感，尽管主宰她们躯体的头脑也许很迟钝，一点儿也没有浪漫情趣，可是在眼前依然把克莱德深深地吸引住了。毕竟眼前就是一种粗俗的肉体美，一无遮盖，唾手可得。随你跟哪个姑娘亲近，都用不着克服心中不安情绪，或是冲破某些禁规戒律。其中有一个长得黑里俏的美人儿，穿着一袭红黑相间的衣裙，额前饰着一条红缎带，看来跟希格比厮混得很熟了，因为她早已跟他在后面房间里，随着钢琴上疯狂地弹出的一支爵士乐曲，一块儿跳起舞来了。 这时，拉特勒已坐在一把镀金椅子里，膝上有一个浅褐色头发。碧蓝眼睛。 细高挑儿的姑娘懒洋洋地斜卧着……不免使克莱德大吃一惊。而且她正抽着一支香烟，用她金色轻便鞋按着钢琴弹奏出的曲调，轻轻地在打拍子。此时此刻，他仿佛觉得自己真的置身于惊人的阿拉丁式的阿拉伯童话世界。还有，在赫格伦面前，站着一个德国型，或是斯堪的纳维亚型的姑娘，她长得又丰满。又漂亮，两手叉腰，两脚却八字形撇开。这时，她正在问……克莱德听得出，她是一个劲儿在提高嗓门: "今儿晚上，你跟我温存一番，好吗? "可是，赫格伦显然并没有被这种挑逗所激动，泰然自若地摇摇头，于是，这个姑娘就往金塞拉那边走去了。 克莱德正在边看边想的时候，有一个长得相当妩媚动人的碧眼金发女郎，年纪不会在二十四岁以下，可是在克莱德看来，却比实际年龄显得年轻些，她端来一把椅子，挨在他身边坐下，说: "你不想跳舞吗? "他心神不安地摇摇头。"我就教你，好吗? ""哦，反正我学不好的。""哦，这个可不难，"她接下去说。"走吧! "可他还是一口回绝了，虽然他对她那种殷勤劲儿相当高兴。于是，她又找补着说: "那末，就喝一点儿，怎么样? ""当然可以，"他有点儿献殷勤似的同意了。于是，她马上招呼那个黑人小姑娘转身过来充当侍女。不一会儿，一张小圆桌就摆在他们面前，桌上放着一瓶威士忌苏打水……克莱德一见此状，不由得感到惊异和困扰，几乎连话儿都说不出来了。他口袋里有四十块美元，可是他听别人说，这里的酒每瓶至少也要两块美元。试想他怎么能买高价酒给这类女人喝! 他家里母亲和弟弟妹妹，因为入不敷出，日子可难过呢。不过，他到底还是买了好几瓶，钱都付了，心里老是觉得上当，即使不算狂饮作乐，也不免有点儿惊人的浪费了。可是，话又说回来，他既然来到这里了，好歹也得硬撑到底。 再说，这时他已看出: 这个姑娘确实很标致。她身上穿一件德尔夫特蓝色天鹅绒晚礼服，脚上穿着轻便鞋和长袜子，色彩配得很好。她戴着一副蓝色的耳环，脖子。肩膀和胳臂都是丰满而又光泽。最叫克莱德心慌意乱的是……她的胸衣领口很低……他几乎不敢往她那儿看……她的双颊和嘴唇都涂了脂粉口红……一望可知，就是烟花女的标志。不过，她似乎并不胡搅蛮缠，说实话，颇有人情味。而且，她还津津有味地一个劲儿望着他那双深沉。乌黑，而又显得紧张不安的眼睛。 "你也是在格林－戴维逊工作，是吗? "她开口问。 "是的，"克莱德回答说。他竭力装出自己对这里一切并不陌生的样子……仿佛他对此地和此类场面早就习已为常了。"你怎么会知道的? ""哦，我认识奥斯卡。赫格伦，"她回答说。"这儿他常来。他是你的朋友吧? ""是的，也就是说，他跟我一块在酒店工作。""可这儿你还没来过呢。""没有呢，"克莱德连忙接住说，不过心里不觉有点儿疑惑不解。她干吗要说他从前没有来过呢? "我想你没来过呗。因为那拨小伙子八成儿我都见过，可是我从来没见过你。 你不久前才到酒店工作，是吧? ""是的，"克莱德说着，对她这一句话不免有点儿反感，因此，他前额两道眉毛马上皱起了鸡皮疙瘩，不停地上下翕动着……每当他心里紧张，或是陷入沉思的时候，就不由自主地会有这种时而绷紧。时而松弛的表情。"那又怎么啦? ""哦，没什么。我只不过是胡猜罢了。我说，你跟别的小伙子们不大一样……看起来你就是有点儿不同。"她既想巴结又怪别扭地笑了。此时此刻她的这种笑和她的这种心态，都让克莱德猜不透。 "怎么个不一样? "他脸一沉，气呼呼地问她，随手端起酒杯，就喝起酒来了。 "有一点我敢说猜对了，"他的问话她压根儿没听见，只顾自己说，"象我这样的姑娘，你不怎么喜欢，是吧? ""哦，不，我很喜欢，"他含含糊糊地说。 "哦，不，你才不喜欢吧。我看得出来。不过，我呀还是喜欢你。我喜欢你的那双眼睛。你跟所有那些家伙可不一样。你比他们好象文雅些，心肠好些。 这我看得出来。你跟他们就是不一样。""哦，我可不知道，"克莱德回答说，经她一恭维，心里真是乐滋滋，可是额角上依然象刚才那样皱起鸡皮疙瘩。这个姑娘也许不至于象他原先设想的那么坏吧。她比其他那些姑娘要聪明些……稍微文雅些。她的装束打扮也不是那么俗不可耐。而且，她也不象缠住赫格伦。希格比。金塞拉和拉特勒的这帮子姑娘那样扑倒在克莱德身上。这时候，这拨年轻小伙子们都坐在椅子里，或是软椅里，姑娘们都偎坐在他们膝上。而且每一对伴侣面前，都置放一张各有一瓶威士忌的小圆桌。 "你们看，谁在那儿喝威士忌! "金塞拉是冲那些正在洗耳恭听他的人说的，两眼却向克莱德眨巴着。 "哦，你不用怕我，"那个姑娘接下去说，这时克莱德两眼直瞅着她的手臂和脖子，还有她那过于袒裸的胸脯，使他浑身发冷，却又黯然销魂。"我不久前才做这个生意。要不是过去运气太坏，我才不会上这儿呢。要是有办法，我宁可跟家里亲人待在一起，只不过现在他们不要我了。"她煞有介事地两眼俯视着，可心里多半在捉摸克莱德这个没有经验的小笨蛋……好一个乳臭未干的黄口小儿! 同时，她也想到刚才看见他从口袋里掏钱……数目相当可观。而且，她还想到他长得多么好看，虽算不上漂亮，劲头也不大，却很惹人喜爱。可是偏巧这时候，克莱德心里却在惦念着爱思达，真不知道她上哪儿去了，此刻她又在哪儿。她现在会怎么样……有谁知道呢? 她会碰上什么遭遇呢? 眼前这个姑娘，也许就碰到过如同爱思达那样的不幸吧? 一种出自肺腑之间，却又不免有些鄙视的同情心，在他心中油然而生。他两眼直瞅着她，仿佛要说: "你这个可怜的女人啊。 "不过，他一时还不敢说，而且再也不敢向她问这问那了。 "你们，这些小伙子，也就是说到这种地方来逛逛的人，总是把我们每一个人想得都是非常坏。我可了解你们。其实，我们可并不是象你们所想象的那么坏呗。"克莱德又在不断地皱眉头了。也许，她可不是象他所想象的那么坏吧。她是一个下流女人，这是不用说的……虽然丑恶，可是很漂亮。事实上，他不时举目四顾，觉得满屋子姑娘哪一个都没有象她那样更叫他喜欢的了。而她呢，也觉得克莱德比别的小伙子好得多……谈吐也很文雅……这一点她已经看清楚了。这样的恭维话，果然正中要害。于是，她就马上给他斟酒，劝他一起喝。 这时候，另有一拨年轻小伙子进来了……另有其他姑娘从后面神秘之门走了出来，迎接他们……他看见赫格伦。拉特勒。金塞拉。希格比，全都鬼鬼祟祟地直奔后面挂上厚厚的帷幕与大厅隔开的楼梯，一转眼就不见了。正当这另一拨年轻人进来的时候，这个姑娘就把他请到后面灯光更为幽暗的房间。坐在一张长长的软椅里。 两人坐定以后，她就紧紧地偎着他，来回抚摸他的手，到后来用一只胳臂挽住他的胳臂，同他的身子紧贴一起，还问他想不想看看二楼一些房间陈设该有多么漂亮。他一看这会儿只剩下他一个人在这里……同他一块来的那伙人，没有一个会看见他的……再说，这个姑娘仿佛一往情深地紧偎着他……因此，他就让她带领，登上挂着帷幕的后面楼梯，径直走进了一个粉红和蓝色相映成趣的小房间，同时，他心里却一直在琢磨，只要迈出这荒唐而危险的一步，最后很可能使他遭到灭顶之灾。也许，他还会传染一些令人骇怕的病呢。也许她向他要钱，他还付不起。现在他害怕她……害怕自己……说真的，对世界上一切都害怕……而且，由于以上种种惧怕和良心的谴责，他一下子紧张起来，几乎连一句话都说不出来了。不过话又说回来，他去还是去了，他一进去，门就锁上了。这个耐人寻味的。丰腴优美的维纳斯女神一转过身来，把他紧紧地楼住了，随后，她神色从容地站到一面映出她全身倩影的穿衣镜前，让她自己和他都可以看得清清楚楚，她已开始宽衣解带……/td]

Part 1 Chapter 11 The effect of this adventure on Clyde was such as might have been expected in connection with one so new andstrange to such a world as this. In spite of all that deep and urgent curiosity and desire that had eventually ledhim to that place and caused him to yield, still, because of the moral precepts with which he had so long beenfamiliar, and also because of the nervous esthetic inhibitions which were characteristic of him, he could not butlook back upon all this as decidedly degrading and sinful. His parents were probably right when they preachedthat this was all low and shameful. And yet this whole adventure and the world in which it was laid, once it wasall over, was lit with a kind of gross, pagan beauty or vulgar charm for him. And until other and more interestingthings had partially effaced it, he could not help thinking back upon it with considerable interest and pleasure,even. 　　In addition he kept telling himself that now, having as much money as he was making, he could go and do aboutas he pleased. He need not go there any more if he did not want to, but he could go to other places that might notbe as low, maybe--more refined. He wouldn't want to go with a crowd like that again. He would rather have justone girl somewhere if he could find her--a girl such as those with whom he had seen Sieberling and Doyleassociate. And so, despite all of his troublesome thoughts of the night before, he was thus won quickly over tothis new source of pleasure if not its primary setting. He must find a free pagan girl of his own somewhere if hecould, like Doyle, and spend his money on her. And he could scarcely wait until opportunity should provide himwith the means of gratifying himself in this way. 　　But more interesting and more to his purpose at the time was the fact that both Hegglund and Ratterer, in spiteof, or possibly because of, a secret sense of superiority which they detected in Clyde, were inclined to look uponhim with no little interest and to court him and to include him among all their thoughts of affairs and pleasures. 　　Indeed, shortly after his first adventure, Ratterer invited him to come to his home, where, as Clyde most quicklycame to see, was a life very different from his own. At the Griffiths' all was so solemn and reserved, the stillmoods of those who feel the pressure of dogma and conviction. In Ratterer's home, the reverse of this was nearlytrue. The mother and sister with whom he lived, while not without some moral although no particular religiousconvictions, were inclined to view life with a great deal of generosity or, as a moralist would have seen it, laxity. 　　There had never been any keen moral or characterful direction there at all. And so it was that Ratterer and hissister Louise, who was two years younger than himself, now did about as they pleased, and without thinking verymuch about it. But his sister chanced to be shrewd or individual enough not to wish to cast herself away on justany one. 　　The interesting part of all this was that Clyde, in spite of a certain strain of refinement which caused him to lookaskance at most of this, was still fascinated by the crude picture of life and liberty which it offered. Among suchas these, at least, he could go, do, be as he had never gone or done or been before. And particularly was hepleased and enlightened--or rather dubiously liberated--in connection with his nervousness and uncertainty inregard to his charm or fascination for girls of his own years. For up to this very time, and in spite of his recentfirst visit to the erotic temple to which Hegglund and the others had led him, he was still convinced that he hadno skill with or charm where girls were concerned. Their mere proximity or approach was sufficient to cause himto recede mentally, to chill or palpitate nervously, and to lose what little natural skill he had for conversation orpoised banter such as other youths possessed. But now, in his visits to the home of Ratterer, as he soondiscovered, he was to have ample opportunity to test whether this shyness and uncertainty could be overcome. 　　For it was a center for the friends of Ratterer and his sister, who were more or less of one mood in regard to life. 　　Dancing, card-playing, love-making rather open and unashamed, went on there. Indeed, up to this time, Clydewould not have imagined that a parent like Mrs. Ratterer could have been as lackadaisical or indifferent as shewas, apparently, to conduct and morals generally. He would not have imagined that any mother would havecountenanced the easy camaraderie that existed between the sexes in Mrs. Ratterer's home. 　　And very soon, because of several cordial invitations which were extended to him by Ratterer, he found himselfpart and parcel of this group--a group which from one point of view--the ideas held by its members, the ratherwretched English they spoke--he looked down upon. From another point of view--the freedom they possessed,the zest with which they managed to contrive social activities and exchanges--he was drawn to them. Because,for the first time, these permitted him, if he chose, to have a girl of his own, if only he could summon thecourage. And this, owing to the well-meant ministrations of Ratterer and his sister and their friends, he soonsought to accomplish. Indeed the thing began on the occasion of his first visit to the Ratterers. 　　Louise Ratterer worked in a dry-goods store and often came home a little late for dinner. On this occasion shedid not appear until seven, and the eating of the family meal was postponed accordingly. In the meantime, twogirl friends of Louise arrived to consult her in connection with something, and finding her delayed, and Rattererand Clyde there, they made themselves at home, rather impressed and interested by Clyde and his new finery. 　　For he, at once girl-hungry and girl-shy, held himself nervously aloof, a manifestation which they mistook for aconviction of superiority on his part. And in consequence, arrested by this, they determined to show how reallyinteresting they were--vamp him--no less. And he found their crude briskness and effrontery very appealing--somuch so that he was soon taken by the charms of one, a certain Hortense Briggs, who, like Louise, was nothingmore than a crude shop girl in one of the large stores, but pretty and dark and self- appreciative. And yet from thefirst, he realized that she was not a little coarse and vulgar--a very long way removed from the type of girl he hadbeen imagining in his dreams that he would like to have. 　　"Oh, hasn't she come in yet?" announced Hortense, on first being admitted by Ratterer and seeing Clyde near oneof the front windows, looking out. "Isn't that too bad? Well, we'll just have to wait a little bit if you don't mind"-thislast with a switch and a swagger that plainly said, who would mind having us around? And forthwith shebegan to primp and admire herself before a mirror which surmounted an ocher-colored mantelpiece that graced afireless grate in the dining-room. And her friend, Greta Miller, added: "Oh, dear, yes. I hope you won't make usgo before she comes. We didn't come to eat. We thought your dinner would be all over by now.""Where do you get that stuff--'put you out'?" replied Ratterer cynically. "As though anybody could drive you twoouta here if you didn't want to go. Sit down and play the victrola or do anything you like. Dinner'll soon be readyand Louise'll be here any minute." He returned to the dining-room to look at a paper which he had been reading,after pausing to introduce Clyde. And the latter, because of the looks and the airs of these two, felt suddenly asthough he had been cast adrift upon a chartless sea in an open boat. 　　"Oh, don't say eat to me!" exclaimed Greta Miller, who was surveying Clyde calmly as though she were debatingwith herself whether he was worth-while game or not, and deciding that he was: "With all the ice-cream and cakeand pie and sandwiches we'll have to eat yet to-night. We was just going to warn Louise not to fill up too much. 　　Kittie Keane's givin' a birthday party, you know, Tom, and she'll have a big cake an' everythin'. You're comin' 　　down, ain't you, afterwards?" she concluded, with a thought of Clyde and his possible companionship in mind. 　　"I wasn't thinkin' of it," calmly observed Ratterer. "Me and Clyde was thinkin' of goin' to a show after dinner.""Oh, how foolish," put in Hortense Briggs, more to attract attention to herself and take it away from Greta thananything else. She was still in front of the mirror, but turned now to cast a fetching smile on all, particularlyClyde, for whom she fancied her friend might be angling, "When you could come along and dance. I call thatsilly.""Sure, dancing is all you three ever think of--you and Louise," retorted Ratterer. "It's a wonder you don't giveyourselves a rest once in a while. I'm on my feet all day an' I like to sit down once in a while." He could be mostmatter-of-fact at times. 　　"Oh, don't say sit down to me," commented Greta Miller with a lofty smile and a gliding, dancing motion of herleft foot, "with all the dates we got ahead of us this week. Oh, gee!" Her eyes and eyebrows went up and sheclasped her hands dramatically before her. "It's just terrible, all the dancin' we gotta do yet, this winter, don't we,Hortense? Thursday night and Friday night and Saturday and Sunday nights." She counted on her fingers mostarchly. "Oh, gee! It is terrible, really." She gave Clyde an appealing, sympathy-seeking smile. "Guess where wewere the other night, Tom. Louise and Ralph Thorpe and Hortense and Bert Gettler, me and Willie Bassick--outat Pegrain's on Webster Avenue. Oh, an' you oughta seen the crowd out there. Sam Shaffer and Tillie Burns wasthere. And we danced until four in the morning. I thought my knees would break. I ain't been so tired in I don'tknow when.""Oh, gee!" broke in Hortense, seizing her turn and lifting her arms dramatically. "I thought I never would get towork the next morning. I could just barely see the customers moving around. And, wasn't my mother fussy! Gee! 　　She hasn't gotten over it yet. She don't mind so much about Saturdays and Sundays, but all these week nights andwhen I have to get up the next morning at seven-- gee--how she can pick!""An' I don't blame her, either," commented Mrs. Ratterer, who was just then entering with a plate of potatoes andsome bread. "You two'll get sick and Louise, too, if you don't get more rest. I keep tellin' her she won't be able tokeep her place or stand it if she don't get more sleep. But she don't pay no more attention to me than Tom does,and that's just none at all.""Oh, well, you can't expect a fellow in my line to get in early always, Ma," was all Ratterer said. And Hortense Briggs added: "Gee, I'd die if I had to stay in one night. You gotta have a little fun when you work all day."What an easy household, thought Clyde. How liberal and indifferent. And the sexy, gay way in which these twogirls posed about. And their parents thought nothing of it, evidently. If only he could have a girl as pretty as thisHortense Briggs, with her small, sensuous mouth and her bright hard eyes. 　　"To bed twice a week early is all I need," announced Greta Miller archly. "My father thinks I'm crazy, but more'nthat would do me harm." She laughed jestingly, and Clyde, in spite of the "we was'es" and "I seen's," was mostvividly impressed. Here was youth and geniality and freedom and love of life. 　　And just then the front door opened and in hurried Louise Ratterer, a medium-sized, trim, vigorous little girl in ared-lined cape and a soft blue felt hat pulled over her eyes. Unlike her brother, she was brisk and vigorous andmore lithe and as pretty as either of these others. 　　"Oh, look who's here!" she exclaimed. "You two birds beat me home, didnja? Well, I got stuck to-night onaccount of some mix-up in my sales-book. And I had to go up to the cashier's office. You bet it wasn't my fault,though. They got my writin' wrong," then noting Clyde for the first time, she announced: "I bet I know who thisis--Mr. Griffiths. Tom's talked about you a lot. I wondered why he didn't bring you around here before." AndClyde, very much flattered, mumbled that he wished he had. 　　But the two visitors, after conferring with Louise in a small front bedroom to which they all retired, reappearedpresently and because of strenuous invitations, which were really not needed, decided to remain. And Clyde,because of their presence, was now intensely wrought up and alert--eager to make a pleasing impression and tobe received upon terms of friendship here. And these three girls, finding him attractive, were anxious to beagreeable to him, so much so that for the first time in his life they put him at his ease with the opposite sex andcaused him to find his tongue. 　　"We was just going to warn you not to eat so much," laughed Greta Miller, turning to Louise, "and now, see, weare all trying to eat again." She laughed heartily. "And they'll have pies and cakes and everythin' at Kittie's.""Oh, gee, and we're supposed to dance, too, on top of all this. Well, heaven help me, is all I have to say," put inHortense. 　　The peculiar sweetness of her mouth, as he saw it, as well as the way she crinkled it when she smiled, causedClyde to be quite beside himself with admiration and pleasure. She looked quite delightful--wonderful to him. 　　Indeed her effect on him made him swallow quickly and half choke on the coffee he had just taken. He laughedand felt irrepressibly gay. 　　At that moment she turned on him and said: "See, what I've done to him now.""Oh, that ain't all you've done to me," exclaimed Clyde, suddenly being seized with an inspiration and a flow ofthought and courage. Of a sudden, because of her effect on him, he felt bold and courageous, albeit a littlefoolish and added, "Say, I'm gettin' kinda woozy with all the pretty faces I see around here.""Oh, gee, you don't want to give yourself away that quick around here, Clyde," cautioned Ratterer, genially. 　　"These high-binders'll be after you to make you take 'em wherever they want to go. You better not begin thatway." And, sure enough, Louise Ratterer, not to be abashed by what her brother had just said, observed: "Youdance, don't you, Mr. Griffiths?""No, I don't," replied Clyde, suddenly brought back to reality by this inquiry and regretting most violently thehandicap this was likely to prove in this group. "But you bet I wish I did now," he added gallantly and almostappealingly, looking first at Hortense and then at Greta Miller and Louise. But all pretended not to notice hispreference, although Hortense titillated with her triumph. She was not convinced that she was so greatly takenwith him, but it was something to triumph thus easily and handsomely over these others. And the others felt it. 　　"Ain't that too bad?" she commented, a little indifferently and superiorly now that she realized that she was hispreference. "You might come along with us, you and Tom, if you did. There's goin' to be mostly dancing atKittie's."Clyde began to feel and look crushed at once. To think that this girl, to whom of all those here he was mostdrawn, could dismiss him and his dreams and desires thus easily, and all because he couldn't dance. And hisaccursed home training was responsible for all this. He felt broken and cheated. What a boob he must seem notto be able to dance. And Louise Ratterer looked a little puzzled and indifferent, too. But Greta Miller, whom heliked less than Hortense, came to his rescue with: "Oh, it ain't so hard to learn. I could show you in a few minutesafter dinner if you wanted to. It's only a few steps you have to know. And then you could go, anyhow, if youwanted to."Clyde was grateful and said so--determined to learn here or elsewhere at the first opportunity. Why hadn't hegone to a dancing school before this, he asked himself. But the thing that pained him most was the seemingindifference of Hortense now that he had made it clear that he liked her. Perhaps it was that Bert Gettler,previously mentioned, with whom she had gone to the dance, who was making it impossible for him to interesther. So he was always to be a failure this way. Oh, gee! 　　But the moment the dinner was over and while the others were still talking, the first to put on a dance record andcome over with hands extended was Hortense, who was determined not to be outdone by her rival in this way. 　　She was not particularly interested or fascinated by Clyde, at least not to the extent of troubling about him asGreta did. But if her friend was going to attempt a conquest in this manner, was it not just as well to forestallher? And so, while Clyde misread her change of attitude to the extent of thinking that she liked him better thanhe had thought, she took him by the hands, thinking at the same time that he was too bashful. However, placinghis right arm about her waist, his other clasped in hers at her shoulder, she directed his attention to her feet andhis and began to illustrate the few primary movements of the dance. But so eager and grateful was he--almostintense and ridiculous--she did not like him very much, thought him a little unsophisticated and too young. Atthe same time, there was a charm about him which caused her to wish to assist him. And soon he was movingabout with her quite easily--and afterwards with Greta and then Louise, but wishing always it was Hortense. Andfinally he was pronounced sufficiently skillful to go, if he would. 　　And now the thought of being near her, being able to dance with her again, drew him so greatly that, despite thefact that three youths, among them that same Bert Gettler, appeared on the scene to escort them, and although heand Ratterer had previously agreed to go to a theater together, he could not help showing how much he would prefer to follow those others--so much so that Ratterer finally agreed to abandon the theater idea. And soon theywere off, Clyde grieving that he could not walk with Hortense, who was with Gettler, and hating his rivalbecause of this; but still attempting to be civil to Louise and Greta, who bestowed sufficient attention on him tomake him feel at ease. Ratterer, having noticed his extreme preference and being alone with him for a moment,said: "You better not get too stuck on that Hortense Briggs. I don't think she's on the level with anybody. She'sgot that fellow Gettler and others. She'll only work you an' you might not get anything, either."But Clyde, in spite of this honest and well-meant caution, was not to be dissuaded. On sight, and because of thewitchery of a smile, the magic and vigor of motion and youth, he was completely infatuated and would havegiven or done anything for an additional smile or glance or hand pressure. And that despite the fact that he wasdealing with a girl who no more knew her own mind than a moth, and who was just reaching the stage where shewas finding it convenient and profitable to use boys of her own years or a little older for whatever pleasures orclothes she desired. 　　The party proved nothing more than one of those ebullitions of the youthful mating period. The house of KittieKeane was little more than a cottage in a poor street under bare December trees. But to Clyde, because of thepassion for a pretty face that was suddenly lit in him, it had the color and the form and gayety of romance itself. 　　And the young girls and boys that he met there--girls and boys of the Ratterer, Hegglund, Hortense stripe--werestill of the very substance and texture of that energy, ease and forwardness which he would have given his soul topossess. And curiously enough, in spite of a certain nervousness on his part, he was by reason of his newcompanions made an integral part of the gayeties. 　　And on this occasion he was destined to view a type of girl and youth in action such as previously it had not beenhis fortune or misfortune, as you will, to see. There was, for instance, a type of sensual dancing which Louiseand Hortense and Greta indulged in with the greatest nonchalance and assurance. At the same time, many ofthese youths carried whisky in a hip flask, from which they not only drank themselves, but gave others to drink-boysand girls indiscriminately. 　　And the general hilarity for this reason being not a little added to, they fell into more intimate relations--spooningwith one and another--Hortense and Louise and Greta included. Also to quarreling at times. And it appeared tobe nothing out of the ordinary, as Clyde saw, for one youth or another to embrace a girl behind a door, to holdher on his lap in a chair in some secluded corner, to lie with her on a sofa, whispering intimate andunquestionably welcome things to her. And although at no time did he espy Hortense doing this--still, as he saw,she did not hesitate to sit on the laps of various boys or to whisper with rivals behind doors. And this for a timeso discouraged and at the same time incensed him that he felt he could not and would not have anything more todo with her--she was too cheap, vulgar, inconsiderate. 　　At the same time, having partaken of the various drinks offered him--so as not to seem less worldly wise than theothers--until brought to a state of courage and daring not ordinarily characteristic of him, he ventured to halfplead with and at the same time half reproach her for her too lax conduct. 　　"You're a flirt, you are. You don't care who you jolly, do you?" This as they were dancing together after one o'clock to the music of a youth named Wilkens, at the none too toneful piano. She was attempting to show him anew step in a genial and yet coquettish way, and with an amused, sensuous look. 　　"What do you mean, flirt? I don't get you.""Oh, don't you?" replied Clyde, a little crossly and still attempting to conceal his real mood by a deceptive smile. 　　"I've heard about you. You jolly 'em all.""Oh, do I?" she replied quite irritably. "Well, I haven't tried to jolly you very much, have I?""Well, now, don't get mad," he half pleaded and half scolded, fearing, perhaps, that he had ventured too far andmight lose her entirely now. "I don't mean anything by it. You don't deny that you let a lot of these fellows makelove to you. They seem to like you, anyway.""Oh, well, of course they like me, I guess. I can't help that, can I?""Well, I'll tell you one thing," he blurted boastfully and passionately. "I could spend a lot more on you than theycould. I got it." He had been thinking only the moment before of fifty-five dollars in bills that snuggledcomfortably in his pocket. 　　"Oh, I don't know," she retorted, not a little intrigued by this cash offer, as it were, and at the same time not alittle set up in her mood by the fact that she could thus inflame nearly all youths in this way. She was really alittle silly, very lightheaded, who was infatuated by her own charms and looked in every mirror, admiring hereyes, her hair, her neck, her hands, her figure, and practising a peculiarly fetching smile. 　　At the same time, she was not unaffected by the fact that Clyde was not a little attractive to look upon, althoughso very green. She liked to tease such beginners. He was a bit of a fool, as she saw him. But he was connectedwith the Green-Davidson, and he was well-dressed, and no doubt he had all the money he said and would spendit on her. Some of those whom she liked best did not have much money to spend. 　　"Lots of fellows with money would like to spend it on me." She tossed her head and flicked her eyes andrepeated her coyest smile. 　　At once Clyde's countenance darkened. The witchery of her look was too much for him. The skin of his foreheadcrinkled and then smoothed out. His eyes burned lustfully and bitterly, his old resentment of life and deprivationshowing. No doubt all she said was true. There were others who had more and would spend more. He wasboasting and being ridiculous and she was laughing at him. 　　After a moment, he added, weakly, "I guess that's right, too. But they couldn't want you more than I do."The uncalculated honesty of it flattered her not a little. He wasn't so bad after all. They were gracefully glidingabout as the music continued. 　　"Oh, well, I don't flirt everywhere like I do here. These fellows and girls all know each other. We're always going around together. You mustn't mind what you see here."She was lying artfully, but it was soothing to him none the less. "Gee, I'd give anything if you'd only be nice tome," he pleaded, desperately and yet ecstatically. "I never saw a girl I'd rather have than you. You're swell. I'mcrazy about you. Why won't you come out to dinner with me and let me take you to a show afterwards? Don'tyou want to do that, tomorrow night or Sunday? Those are my two nights off. I work other nights."She hesitated at first, for even now she was not so sure that she wished to continue this contact. There wasGettler, to say nothing of several others, all jealous and attentive. Even though he spent money on her, she mightnot wish to bother with him. He was already too eager and he might become troublesome. At the same time, thenatural coquetry of her nature would not permit her to relinquish him. He might fall into the hands of Greta orLouise. In consequence she finally arranged a meeting for the following Tuesday. But he could not come to thehouse, or take her home to-night--on account of her escort, Mr. Gettler. But on the following Tuesday, at six-thirty, near the Green-Davidson. And he assured her that they would dine first at Frissell's, and then see "TheCorsair," a musical comedy at Libby's, only two blocks away.        这一次冶游，如同它对初次涉足这一如此陌生世界的新手一样，也会对克莱德产生多么大的影响，不用说，那是可以想象得到的。尽管他那强烈的好奇心和难以预料的欲念，终于将他引到了那么一个地方，使他屈服了，可是，由于他耳濡目染的那些道德观念，以及他个人确认不符合审美要求的种种禁条，他依然不能不认为: 这一切确实是堕落和邪恶的行为。他的父母在传道时，就说过这些事通通是下流可耻的，想必很有道理吧。可是事后回想起来，那次猎艳和那个世界，在他心目中毕竟闪烁着某种粗鄙。异端的美和世俗的魅力。这一印象只要还没有被其他更有趣的事情冲淡，他在回想这一段经历时，不能不觉得津津有味，乃至于其乐无穷。 此外，他也一直在暗自思忖，如今自己既然能挣到那么多钱，他为什么不可以爱上哪儿就上哪儿，爱干什么就干什么呢。要是他不愿意再去，那就不必去得了，不过，说不定他还可以到另外一些并不那么下流。备不住高雅一点的地方去。他再也不会象上次跟着那一拨人去了。最好还是单独给自己寻摸一个姑娘……就象他见过西伯龄和多伊尔所结识的那一档次的女郎。因此，尽管他一想到前夜的事，就有烦恼不安的思绪，可他很快找到了这种新的欢乐的源泉(当然不是以头一次冶游场面作为背景的)。他一定要象多伊尔那样，给自己寻摸到一个放荡不羁。不信宗教的姑娘，把自己的钱都花在她身上。而且，他几乎焦急不安地在等待机会，以便满足自己的愿望。 不过，当时让克莱德更感有趣。对他更为有利的是: 赫格伦和拉特勒虽已发觉克莱德怀有优越感，或者说也许正因为如此，他们对他更感兴趣，尽量讨好他，不论在琢磨什么寻欢作乐这类事，务必让他参与进来。事实上，在他头一次冶游以后不久，拉特勒便邀请克莱德到自己家里，克莱德一看就知道: 拉特勒一家人的生活方式跟自己家里迥然不同。在格里菲思家里，一切都是非常严肃而又谨小慎微，由于受到教规与教义束缚，他们常常保持宁静的心境。然而拉特勒家里，与此恰好相反。跟拉特勒住在一块的母亲和妹妹，尽管没有什么特别的宗教信仰，但她们也并不都是毫无道德观念的人;她们对待生活的态度却非常豁达大度，或者如一位道德家会说……放纵。他们谈论道德或是品行时，从来不提出什么明确的准则。因此，拉特勒和那个比他小两岁的妹妹路易斯，现在他们不论做什么事都是随自己一时高兴，而根本不是三思而行的。不过，多亏他妹妹相当聪明，很有个性，不肯随便委身于人。 最最有意思的是，克莱德尽管自己有些教养，对他周围一切多半看不顺眼，但他还是被生活中放浪形骸的粗鲁画面所倾倒。现在他置身于如此环境之中，至少不会象从前那样身不由己了;他可以随意到过去不让去的地方，但也可以做过去不让做的事情。让他特别高兴，因而茅塞顿开的……也可以说，他再也不必半信半疑了: 因为过去他对那些年龄跟自己相仿的姑娘们究竟有多大魅力，使她们为之倾倒，自己一直没有把握，不觉有些紧张，可现在他已心中有数了。 截至此时为止，尽管最近赫格伦一伙人带他去初游爱神的殿堂，他依然认为自己跟那些姑娘们周旋简直没有本领，也可以说没有魅力。那些姑娘们只要跟他站在一块，或者来接近他，就足以使他产生退避三舍的想法，使他不由得打寒噤，或则心儿突突地跳;一般年轻小伙子都会谈笑逗乐，这种本领虽然他生来也有一点儿，可是到时候偏偏倏忽不见了。现在他多次到拉特勒家作客之后，很快就发觉，他已经能够得到充分的机会，测试自己这种羞怯不安的情绪究竟能不能加以克服。 这里是拉特勒和他妹妹路易斯的朋友们聚会的中心。他们兄妹俩看待生活的观点多少是一致的。跳舞。打纸牌，和相当公开。一点儿不害臊的调情取乐，在这儿是习已为常了。直到此刻为止，克莱德真的没有想到: 作为一个母亲，对待道德和品行诸问题，居然可以象拉特勒太太那样，一概装聋作哑。漠不关心。 他简直不能想象天底下哪有这样一位母亲，竟然会赞成拉特勒太太家里那种两性之间如此自由的朋友关系。 经过拉特勒好几次热情相邀以后，克莱德很快就觉得自己已是他们这一小拨人中的一员了。不过，从某个观点来看……从这一拨人的一些想法来看，以及从他们所说的蹩脚英语来看……他对这一拨人还是看不起的。可是，再从另一个观点来看……他们那种自由自在。放荡不羁的派头，以至他们热心交际活动和相互酬应的那种劲儿……却把他给吸引住了。因为他可以利用这些机会，只要他高兴，只要他有胆量，就能找到一个属于他自己的姑娘，这对他来说还是生平头一遭呢。是的，就是通过拉特勒兄妹俩，以及他们一些朋友的好心相助，克莱德的希望很快实现了。事实上，这件事在他到拉特勒家里初次作客时就开始了。 路易斯。拉特勒在一家绸布店工作，回家吃晚饭往往迟一些。这一次，她直到七点才回来，家里吃饭的时间也就往后推迟了。刚才路易斯有两个女朋友来过，想找她商量一些事。她们发现她还没有回家，只有拉特勒和克莱德在那里，也就毫无拘束地留下了。哪知道她们一下子对克莱德和他身上那套新装产生了很大兴趣。由于克莱德一想到女人简直如饥若渴，见了女人却又很羞怯，这时他心里紧张极了，不知怎的露出了孤高自赏的神态，竟被她们误解为这是克莱德身上优越感的一种表现。现在，她们既然被他这种神态吸引住了，就不妨故意炫耀一下她们该有多么迷人……以姿色来勾引他。她们那种粗俗的活泼劲儿和毫不害臊的态度，他倒是觉得很吸引人;没有多久，他就被一个名叫霍丹斯。布里格斯的魅力给吸引住了。霍丹斯这个姑娘如同路易斯一样，就是一家大商店里一个粗俗不堪的售货员，只因为她长得黑里俏，自以为了不起。反正克莱德一开头就感到她很粗鄙。庸俗……与他多年来梦寐以求的那类姑娘简直相去太远了。 "哦，她还没回来吗? "拉特勒刚把霍丹斯请进来，她一看见克莱德正凭窗外眺，就大声嚷嚷说。"那不是太倒霉吗? 得了吧，我们就只好等她呗，要是你们不介意的话。"……她说最后这句话的时候，故意卖弄风骚，明明白白地在说，谁敢不欢迎我们光临呢? 拉特勒家餐室里有一个没有生火的壁炉，赭色壁炉架上竖了一面镜子，这时，霍丹斯就对着镜子搔首弄姿，尽情欣赏自己的容貌。她的朋友格里达。米勒接茬说: "哦，当然罗，我们只好等她呗。我希望在她没有回来以前，你们别撵我们走。我们俩可不是来吃饭的。我们还以为你们早就吃过了。 ""你打哪儿学的这个扯儿……' ''''撵你们走，? "拉特勒挖苦地说。"仿佛你们不肯走，人家就把你们两个一块撵走似的。快坐下，打开留声机，要不然随你们便就得了。马上吃晚饭了，路易斯一会儿就回来。"他把克莱德介绍给她们以后，就回到餐室去继续看刚才放下的报纸。克莱德一看这两位姑娘的容貌和神态，突然觉得仿佛自己有如一叶孤舟，正在尚未记入海图的海面上随风漂流。 "哦，别跟我提吃的事! "格里达。米勒大声嚷道，这时，她正不动声色地打量克莱德，可心里仿佛正在七上八下地思考，此人究竟值得不值得追求。最后她认定是值得的，于是开口说: "可今儿晚上我们还得要吃的，不管冰淇淋。蛋糕。 馅儿饼和夹肉面包都行。我们是特地来提醒路易斯，叫她先别吃得太饱了。汤姆，你知道吧，吉蒂。基恩今儿个生日，她要请客，准备了大蛋糕，还有许许多多东西。过一会儿你也去，是吧? "末了，她嘴上是这么说的，心里却想的是克莱德，可不可以也邀他一块去呢。 "这个我可没想到，"拉特勒奉然自若地说。"我和克莱德打算吃过饭就上剧院看戏去。""哦，真傻，"霍丹斯。布里格斯插嘴说，一心要把注意中心从格里达。米勒转移到自己身上。她还伫立在镜前，这时侧过身来，向大家……特别是克莱德……迷人地一笑，心想她的朋友大概已在勾引他吧。"本来你可以跟我一块儿去跳跳舞，却硬要看戏去，依我看，那就太傻啦。""当然罗，你们三个……不管是你们俩，还是路易斯……就是只想跳舞呗，"拉特勒回嘴说。"真怪，你们从来都不想歇一会儿。我一天到晚老是东奔西跑，说真的巴不得这会儿坐下来透口气。"有的时候，他倒是很实事求是的。 "哦，别让我坐下歇着，"格里达。米勒说，一面高傲地一笑，随后抬起左脚，顺势一滑溜，好象就要翩翩起舞似的。"本星期约会可多着呢。嘿，真够呛! "她把眼睛和眉毛往上一扬，两手紧攥在胸前，显出无可奈何的神态。"今年一冬还得跳这么多的舞，真吓人……霍丹斯，是吧? 星期四晚上。星期五晚上，还有星期六和星期日晚上。"她卖弄风骚地掐着指头说。"嘿，够呛! 真吓死人。"她特别讨好地向克莱德笑了一笑，仿佛向他寻求同情似的。"你猜，我们那天晚上是在哪儿，汤姆? 路易斯和拉尔夫。索普，霍丹斯和伯特。格特勒，还有我和威利。 巴西克……都上韦伯斯特大街佩格兰舞厅去了。哦，说实在的，你也该去那儿，看看那一大拨人。萨姆。谢菲尔和蒂利。伯恩斯也在那儿。我们跳呀跳，一直跳到转天凌晨四点。我只怕我的两条腿快断了。我可不记得多咱有这么累过哩。 ""哦，真够呛! "霍丹斯插嘴说，一面马上抓住机会，举起两臂，仿佛做戏似的，"我还以为转天上午可上不了班呢。我两眼模模糊糊，几乎连顾客也都看不清。这可叫我妈急坏了! 真吓人! 至今她神志还没恢复过来哩。平时星期六和星期日晚上去跳她还不怎么反对，可是现在一星期里天天晚上都跳，而转天早上七点，我还得照常起床……对不起……要不然，她就嘀嘀咕咕没个完! ""可我倒也不怪她，"拉特勒太太插话说，这时她正好托着一盘土豆和一些面包走了进来。"你们两个要是不多多休息休息，准要病倒的，路易斯也是一样。 我可一个劲儿对她说，要是她再不多睡一会儿觉，她的工作就准保不住了，再说，她的身体怕是也顶不住的。可她就是象汤姆一样也不听我的话，只当压根儿没这回事呢。""哦，干我这一行的人，你就别指望能每天早早回来，妈，"拉特勒拢共只说了这么一句。霍丹斯。布里格斯又找补着说: "好家伙，要是叫我在家待上一晚，那可要把我憋死了。工作了一整天，可也得让我乐一乐嘛。"克莱德心里想，这个家该是多么轻松愉快啊。多么落落大方，多么满不在乎。瞧这两个姑娘神气，该有多么性感，多么热情。显而易见，她们的父母也是什么都不在意的。要是他也有一个就象霍丹斯。布里格斯那样长着一张富于肉感的小嘴。一双明亮而又厉害的眼睛的漂亮姑娘，该有多好! "每星期我只要有两晚上早睡就够了，"格里达。米勒淘气地说。"我父亲说我简直是疯了，不过，我觉得多睡反而对身体不好。"她闹着玩儿，一边说，一边哈哈大笑起来，尽管有些话她说的都是土话俚语，可克莱德还是听得津津有味。反正从这里就可以看到青春。快活。自由和热爱生活。 正在这当儿，前门开了，路易斯。拉特勒急冲冲走进来。她是个衣着整洁。 生气勃勃。中等身材的小姑娘，披着一条红衬里的披肩，一顶蓝色软呢帽低低地拉到眼梢边上。她比哥哥显得更要活泼，浑身有劲儿;她身段虽比她的两个女友柔软，但模样儿却是一样漂亮。 "哦，看谁在这儿! "她大声嚷嚷说。"你们这两个丫头找上门来，而且还比我先到，是不是? 唉，今儿晚上因为帐面上出了一点岔错，给拖住了。我就得上出纳那儿说明去。虽然那决不是我的岔错。是人家把我写的字认错了，"这时她才头一次发现了克莱德，便说: "我准知道这一位是谁……是格里菲思先生嘛。汤姆常常念叨你。我心里老是纳闷，干吗他不早点把你带来。"克莱德听了心里喜孜孜，就咕哝着说，他也巴不得自己能早点跟拉特勒一家人见见面。 不过，那两位客人跟路易斯一块走进了前面的一个小卧室，商量了一会儿，马上出来了。由于主人几次三番地热情相邀，她们就决定留下来……其实，用不着坚邀，她们也会留下来的。克莱德一见到她们在场，就非常兴奋，特别带劲……而且急急乎想给她们一个好印象，往后好跟这些姑娘亲密来往。这三个姑娘觉得他富有吸引力，也急于博得他的好感，因此就使得他生平头一遭泰然自若地跟异性交际应酬，有说有笑了。 "我们是特地来关照你，千万别吃得太饱，"格里达。米勒侧过身来，冲路易斯笑着说。"可是，现在你看，我们自个儿倒是又在吃了。"她开怀大笑说。"吉蒂家里会有馅儿饼和蛋糕，什么好吃的都有。""哦，得了，最痛快的听说我们还得要跳舞呢。哦，我只好说请老天爷保佑了，"霍丹斯插话说。 克莱德留意到，她的那张小嘴特别惹人喜爱，每当她笑的时候，嘴儿轻轻地一皱，那种迷人的劲儿，竟让克莱德又惊又喜，简直不能自已了。在他看来，她那一举一动，一颦一笑，都是很讨人欢喜的……简直是令人完全倾倒。是的，她那股迷人的魅力，确实使他很快把刚拿来的咖啡一口喝下去，差一点噎住了。 他放声大笑，觉得自己真的乐不可支了。 是我叫他乐得这个样子。""哦，瞧你的能耐，岂止这些，"克莱德大声嚷嚷说;他忽然灵机一动，勇气也一下子来了。由于她施加给他的影响，他猛地觉得自己胆大如牛，尽管还带有几分傻劲儿。于是，他接下去说: "嘿，我一看见这么多漂亮的脸蛋儿，真的要晕头晕脑了。""哎哟哟，你可用不着这样快就上她们的当，克莱德，"拉特勒出于好心告诫他说。"这些拆白党会拼命追你，她们想上哪儿，就让你带她们上哪儿。一开头你最好不要就这样呀。"果然不出所料，路易斯。拉特勒并不因为她哥哥刚才说的话就觉得害臊，她说: "格里菲思先生，你会跳舞，是吗? ""不，我不会，"克莱德回答说;路易斯这一问，使他马上头脑清醒，觉得在这拨人中间才发现自己这一不足之处，心中非常懊恼。"不过，我现在的确巴不得能跳才好，"他先是望望霍丹斯，然后望望格里达。米勒，带着几分恳求的神气，套近乎地继续说。可是，谁都佯装没有注意到他到底最喜欢哪一位，虽然霍丹斯由于捷足先登，不免心里有些雀跃。她并不认为自己对他十分中意，不过，她一出场，就这么光彩照人地一下子压倒了她的那两个对手，毕竟值得暗自庆幸的。这一点连她的女友也感觉到了。"这不是太糟了吗? "此刻她因为深信克莱德最喜欢自己，所以，她有点儿满不在乎，乃至于自视甚高地说。"要是你会跳，那你和汤姆两个就可以跟我们一块去。吉蒂家里几乎动不动就跳舞。 "克莱德开始泄气了，而且马上形之于色。试想一下: 这儿的几个姑娘里头，她原是最吸引他的一个，现在她却易如反掌地把他，连同他的美梦和心愿一块都给抛弃了，只是因为他不会跳舞。这一切都得怪他那该死的家庭教育。他觉得自己泄了气。受了骗。连跳舞都不会，在她们眼里岂不是大傻瓜吗。路易斯。 拉特勒也露出一点儿困惑。冷漠的神色。不过，格里达。米勒……虽然她要博得克莱德青睐还比不上霍丹斯，可她却给他解了围，说: "哦，那跳舞……可并不难学嘛。只要你高兴，饭后我教你几分钟就会了。你只要记住几个步法就得了。 那时候你要是高兴，就不妨跟我们一块去。"克莱德听后很高兴，连忙道谢，说……他已下了决心，今后一有机会，就要学会它，不论是在这里还是在别处。他抚心自问，为什么不早点进跳舞学校呢? 不过，他心中最痛苦的是，在他已表白过自己喜欢霍丹斯之后她还表现出那种看似冷淡的神态。也许就是因为刚才提到的。跟她一块去跳舞的那个伯特。 格特勒，才使他不可能引起霍丹斯的兴趣吧。这等事他总是这么不走运。唉! 不过，晚饭刚吃完，大家还在聊天的时候，首先打开唱机，放上舞曲唱片，把手伸过来向他邀舞的，正是霍丹斯: 她决心不让她的对手占上风。其实，她对克莱德并不特别感兴趣或是着了迷，至少不象格里达那样为了他禁不住心慌。 不过，要是她的女朋友打算利用这样方式把他征服，难道说她还不该先下手为强? 克莱德却误解了霍丹斯态度上这一变化原因，以为她比他想象中还要喜欢他，正在这当儿，她便拉住了他的手，心想此人简直太扭扭捏捏了。尽管这样，她还是叫他右手搂在她腰里，左手在她肩膀上方握住她的右手，要他注意她的脚和自己的脚，并且开始示范，做了几个跳舞的基本动作。殊不知他一时太性急，心中也太感激了……几乎紧张到了令人可笑的程度……使霍丹斯很不喜欢，觉得此人不免有些单纯，而且也太稚嫩了。与此同时，他身上毕竟也有他的可爱之处，使她乐于助他一臂之力。不一会儿，他已经能相当轻快自如地跟她跳舞了……后来他又跟格里达和路易斯跳了一会儿，不过心里总巴不得跟霍丹斯跳。 最后，一致公认他的舞步已经相当熟练，只要他愿意去，就可以跟她们一块跳舞去了。 克莱德一想到只要同霍丹斯接近，还能再跟她跳舞，心中就来了很大劲儿，所以，不管这时已有三个年轻人(其中包括那个伯特。格特勒在内)来陪她们一块去，而且克莱德跟拉特勒事先还约定一起去看戏，可他仍然情不自禁，表示要跟大伙儿一块去……既然这样，拉特勒最后只好同意取消看戏的打算了。不一会儿，他们就出发了。这时，霍丹斯是由伯特。格特勒陪着的，克莱德因为不能同她在一起走，心里很恼火，因而也就憎恨他的这个情敌。幸好路易斯和格里达对他相当亲切，使他心里稍微舒畅一些，于是，他就竭力向她们俩献殷勤。 拉特勒发觉他特别喜欢霍丹斯，就抓住单独跟他在一块的时机，对他说: "最好别死追霍丹斯。布里格斯。依我看，她只不过是卖弄风骚罢了。她随便支使了格特勒这一伙人。也许她只不过逗逗你，你休想从她那儿得到些什么。 "可是这种出于至诚的善意规劝，并没有使克莱德头脑清醒一些。不论是见到她也好，还是由于她那微笑的蛊惑，她那一举手，一投足，充满青春的魔力和活力，竟使他完全神魂颠倒了。若是她再给他一笑，一瞥，一握手，无论要他献出什么或者做些什么，他都甘之如饴。殊不知他眼前结识的这位姑娘，对自己奋进目标，不会比一只飞蛾知道得更多;只不过到了她认为既方便。而又有利的时机，她便去利用一下同她自己年龄相仿或则稍大一些的男孩子，以达到寻欢作乐，或则获取一些她所心爱的衣服这一目的罢了。 这次聚会不外乎是年轻人追求爱侣时期常见的一次热情迸发罢了。吉蒂。 基恩的家，只不过是在一条寒伧的街上一所小房子，街的两旁都是十二月里光秃秃的树木。不过，在克莱德看来，因为有一张漂亮的脸蛋儿，已使他热恋不已，这里仿佛充满了罗曼蒂克的色彩。氛围和欢乐。而且，他在这里见到的少男少女……拉特勒。赫格伦和霍丹斯这一类型的少男少女……毕竟真正体现出了充沛精力。潇洒自如与热心大胆的素质，他只要能具备这些素质，即使要他把心掏出来，他也乐意。说来也怪得很，他虽然有点神经紧张，可是交上了这些新朋友，他很快就成为这里欢乐人群中的一员了。 这一次，他觉得是个机会，不妨开开眼，看看这一类型少男少女究竟怎样寻欢作乐，这种场面他过去可没有见过，这究竟算是幸运还是不幸，那随你怎么说就得了。比方说，有一种色情舞蹈，路易斯。霍丹斯和格里达都跳得如痴似醉，简直是满不在乎，一点儿也不害臊。与此同时，这些年轻人中有许多人后裤袋里，都带着一小扁瓶威士忌，不仅是他们自己喝，还给别人喝……管他是少男还是少女。 因为有了酒助兴，一下子闹得更欢了，他们之间就更加亲热了，调情取乐也更加大胆了……霍丹斯。路易斯和格里达全都参加。有时候他们也发生争吵。 克莱德看见这一个或是那一个小伙子在门背后搂抱一个姑娘，或是躲进一个僻静角落里，坐在椅子上，把一个姑娘紧紧抱在自己怀里，或是同她一起躺在沙发里，低声轻语，说一些无疑让她高兴听的话: 凡此种种，在这里看来都是司空见惯的事。固然他始终没有发现霍丹斯也有这样的事……可他还是看到: 她毫不迟疑地在好几个年轻小伙子的怀里偎坐过，或是到门背后同几个为了她而争风吃醋的人说悄悄话。有时候，这不免让他泄气而又恼火，觉得自己再也不能同她交往了……她这个人太卑劣，太庸俗，太轻率了。 人家多次请他喝酒，他也都喝了……为的是表示自己善于交际酬酢，并不比别人差……后来他一反常态，壮起胆来，居然以半似规劝。半似谴责的口吻，说到了霍丹斯那种过于放肆的行为。 "原来如此，你真会卖俏呀。不管戏弄谁，你都满不在乎，是吧? "这是半夜一点过后，他正在跟她跳舞时说的。一个名叫威尔肯斯的小伙子，正在一架音色不正的钢琴上弹着曲子伴舞。她露出亲切而又卖俏的神态，打算教给他一种新舞步，随后却给他挤了一个愉快而又富于肉感的眼色。 "卖俏吗? 你说说什么意思? 我可不明白。""哦，你还不明白? "克莱德回答说，有点儿火了，不过还是竭力装着假笑，掩饰自己真实的心情。"我听人说起过你。你把他们都戏弄了。""哦，我怎么啦? "她相当生气地抢白说。"嘿，我好象还没有把你怎么戏弄，是不是? ""得了吧，别生气，"他半似规劝。半似谴责地说，也许担心自己把话说得太过头，很可能完全失去了她。"可我并没有什么别的意思。你也不否认，你让这么多小伙子跟你调情吧。反正他们好象都很喜欢你哩。""哦，当然罗，他们都喜欢我。可是，这叫我怎么办? ""得了，我这就告诉你吧，"他突然心里一激动，就带点吹嘘味道，不假思索地冲口而说。"我在你身上花钱，可以比他们哪一个还要多。我有的是钱。"刚才他还想到自己口袋里安安稳稳搁着五十块美钞。 "哦，我可不知道，"她不以为然地说。她对所谓钱财之事非常关心;与此同时，使她得意洋洋的，就是说，她有能耐，准叫小伙子差不多个个都象烈火上身似的。其实，霍丹斯并不是太聪明，而且轻浮得很，自以为富于魅力，见了镜子，禁不住左顾右盼，欣赏自己的眼眸。秀发。脖子。双手和身姿，还要练一练她那特别诱人的微笑。 克莱德虽说稚嫩，长得却相当富于吸引力，这一点她也不能无动于衷。她喜欢逗弄类似这样的黄口小儿。依她看，他有点儿傻。不过，他是在格林－戴维逊工作的，而且穿得也很讲究;他说他有钱，自然乐意在她身上花钱。别的小伙子，尽管她挺喜欢，可他们当中有些人就是没有多少钱可供挥霍的。 "许多有钱的人，都乐意在我身上花钱呢，"她把头往上一扬，两眼一闪一闪，脸上又露出了她那最诱人的微笑。 克莱德马上脸一沉。她那蛊惑的一颦一笑，已使他招架不住了。他先是眉头皱紧，随后又舒展开来;两眼露出欲火中烧和苦恼的闪光，以及他对清贫生活的夙恨。毫无疑问，霍丹斯说的全是真话。事实上的确有人比他还要有钱，而且还要舍得花钱。刚才他是在吹嘘，太可笑了。何况这会儿她正在嘲笑他哩。 过了半晌，他有气无力地继续说: "我想你这话说得倒是不错。不过，他们可不会象我那样喜欢你吧。"这一片肺腑之言，使她听后得意非凡。说到底，他这个人还算不坏。他们在悠扬的乐曲声中翩翩起舞。 "哦，我并不是到哪儿都象我现在那样随便跟人逗笑。这儿的男男女女全是自己人，都很熟嘛。我们到哪儿都是在一块。你可千万别见怪。"她这是在巧妙地撒谎，不过，这么一来，他总觉得舒服一些。"嘿，只要你待我好，我什么都乐意给呀，"他简直如疯似狂地。不顾一切地恳求她。"我从没见过比你更好的姑娘。你太漂亮了。我已给你迷上了。你多咱跟我一块出去吃饭，饭后我再带你去看戏，好吗? 明儿晚上，还是星期天，你乐意去吗? 这两个晚上我休息。其他晚上我都要上班。"她先是迟疑了一会儿，因为即便到了此刻，她还说不准自己究竟乐意不乐意让这种关系继续下去。且不说其他几个人吧，单是格特勒心里就酸溜溜的，一个劲儿盯着她。即使说克莱德乐意为她花钱，也许她最好不要跟他缠在一起。 现在，他早已心急如焚，恐怕将来麻烦也许还会更多呢。与此同时，她那卖弄风骚的第二天性，也不会让她丢掉他。要是那样的话，他就可能一下子落入格里达或是路易斯手中! 因此，她终于同他约定下星期二见面。不过，今儿晚上他可不能上她家去，也不能送她回家……因为已有格特勒先生护送她。可是下星期二，六点半，她将在格林－戴维逊附近等他。他还对她说，那时他们不妨先到弗里塞尔酒家吃晚饭，饭后上离那儿只有两街区的利比剧院去看歌舞喜剧《海盗》。

Part 1 Chapter 12 Now trivial as this contact may seem to some, it was of the utmost significance to Clyde. Up to this time he hadnever seen a girl with so much charm who would deign to look at him, or so he imagined. And now he had foundone, and she was pretty and actually interested sufficiently to accompany him to dinner and to a show. It wastrue, perhaps, that she was a flirt, and not really sincere with any one, and that maybe at first he could not expecther to center her attentions on him, but who knew--who could tell? 　　And true to her promise on the following Tuesday she met him at the corner of 14th Street and Wyandotte, nearthe Green-Davidson. And so excited and flattered and enraptured was he that he could scarcely arrange hisjumbled thoughts and emotions in any seemly way. But to show that he was worthy of her, he had made analmost exotic toilet--hair pomaded, a butterfly tie, new silk muffler and silk socks to emphasize his bright brownshoes, purchased especially for the occasion. 　　But once he had reencountered Hortense, whether all this was of any import to her he could not tell. For, after all,it was her own appearance, not his, that interested her. And what was more--a trick with her--she chose to keephim waiting until nearly seven o'clock, a delay which brought about in him the deepest dejection of spirit for thetime being. For supposing, after all, in the interval, she had decided that she did not care for him and did not wishto see him any more. Well, then he would have to do without her, of course. But that would prove that he was notinteresting to a girl as pretty as she was, despite all the nice clothes he was now able to wear and the money hecould spend. He was determined that, girl or no girl, he would not have one who was not pretty. Ratterer andHegglund did not seem to mind whether the girl they knew was attractive or not, but with him it was a passion. 　　The thought of being content with one not so attractive almost nauseated him. 　　And yet here he was now, on the street corner in the dark--the flare of many signs and lights about, hundreds ofpedestrians hurrying hither and thither, the thought of pleasurable intentions and engagements written upon the faces of many--and he, he alone, might have to turn and go somewhere else--eat alone, go to a theater alone, gohome alone, and then to work again in the morning. He had just about concluded that he was a failure when outof the crowd, a little distance away, emerged the face and figure of Hortense. She was smartly dressed in a blackvelvet jacket with a reddish-brown collar and cuffs, and a bulgy, round tam of the same material with a redleather buckle on the side. And her cheeks and lips were rouged a little. And her eyes sparkled. And as usual shegave herself all the airs of one very well content with herself. 　　"Oh, hello, I'm late, ain't I? I couldn't help it. You see, I forgot I had another appointment with a fella, a friend ofmine--gee, a peach of a boy, too, and it was only at six I remembered that I had the two dates. Well, I was in amess then. So I had to do something about one of you. I was just about to call you up and make a date for anothernight, only I remembered you wouldn't be at your place after six. Tom never is. And Charlie always is in hisplace till six-thirty, anyhow, sometimes later, and he's a peach of a fella that way--never grouchy or nothing. Andhe was goin' to take me to the theater and to dinner, too. He has charge of the cigar stand over here at the Orphia. 　　So I called him up. Well, he didn't like it so very much. But I told him I'd make it another night. Now, aintchaglad? Dontcha think I'm pretty nice to you, disappointin' a good-lookin' fella like Charlie for you?"She had caught a glimpse of the disturbed and jealous and yet fearsome look in Clyde's eyes as she talked ofanother. And the thought of making him jealous was a delight to her. She realized that he was very much smittenwith her. So she tossed her head and smiled, falling into step with him as he moved up the street. 　　"You bet it was nice of you to come," he forced himself to say, even though the reference to Charlie as a "peachof a fella" seemed to affect his throat and his heart at the same time. What chance had he to hold a girl who wasso pretty and self-willed? "Gee, you look swell to-night," he went on, forcing himself to talk and surprisinghimself a little with his ability to do so. "I like the way that hat looks on you, and your coat too." He lookeddirectly at her, his eyes lit with admiration, an eager yearning filling them. He would have liked to have kissedher--her pretty mouth-- only he did not dare here, or anywhere as yet. 　　"I don't wonder you have to turn down engagements. You're pretty enough. Don't you want some roses to wear?"They were passing a flower store at the moment and the sight of them put the thought of the gift in his mind. Hehad heard Hegglund say that women liked fellows who did things for them. 　　"Oh, sure, I would like some roses," she replied, turning into the place. "Or maybe some of those violets. Theylook pretty. They go better with this jacket, I think."She was pleased to think that Clyde was sporty enough to think of flowers. Also that he was saying such nicethings about her. At the same time she was convinced that he was a boy who had had little, if anything, to dowith girls. And she preferred youths and men who were more experienced, not so easily flattered by her--not soeasy to hold. Yet she could not help thinking that Clyde was a better type of boy or man than she wasaccustomed to--more refined. And for that reason, in spite of his gaucheness (in her eyes) she was inclined totolerate him--to see how he would do. 　　"Well, these are pretty nifty," she exclaimed, picking up a rather large bouquet of violets and pinning them on. "Ithink I'll wear these." And while Clyde paid for them, she posed before the mirror, adjusting them to her taste. Atlast, being satisfied as to their effect, she turned and exclaimed, "Well, I'm ready," and took him by the arm. 　　Clyde, being not a little overawed by her spirit and mannerisms, was at a loss what else to say for the moment,but he need not have worried--her chief interest in life was herself. 　　"Gee, I tell you I had a swift week of it last week. Out every night until three. An' Sunday until nearly morning. 　　My, that was some rough party I was to last night, all right. Ever been down to Burkett's at Gifford's Ferry? Oh, anifty place, all right, right over the Big Blue at 39th. Dancing in summer and you can skate outside when it'sfrozen in winter or dance on the ice. An' the niftiest little orchestra."Clyde watched the play of her mouth and the brightness of her eyes and the swiftness of her gestures withoutthinking so much of what she said--very little. 　　"Wallace Trone was along with us--gee, he's a scream of a kid--and afterwards when we was sittin' down to eatice cream, he went out in the kitchen and blacked up an' put on a waiter's apron and coat and then comes backand serves us. That's one funny boy. An' he did all sorts of funny stuff with the dishes and spoons." Clyde sighedbecause he was by no means as gifted as the gifted Trone. 　　"An' then, Monday morning, when we all got back it was nearly four, and I had to get up again at seven. I was allin. I coulda chucked my job, and I woulda, only for the nice people down at the store and Mr. Beck. He's thehead of my department, you know, and say, how I do plague that poor man. I sure am hard on that store. One dayI comes in late after lunch; one of the other girls punched the clock for me with my key, see, and he was out inthe hall and he saw her, and he says to me afterwards, about two in the afternoon, 'Say look here, Miss Briggs' 　　(he always calls me Miss Briggs, 'cause I won't let him call me nothing else. He'd try to get fresh if I did), 'thatloanin' that key stuff don't go. Cut that stuff out now. This ain't no Follies.' I had to laugh. He does get so sore attimes at all of us. But I put him in his place just the same. He's kinda soft on me, you know--he wouldn't fire mefor worlds, not him. So I says to him, 'See here, Mr. Beck, you can't talk to me in any such style as that. I'm notin the habit of comin' late often. An' wot's more, this ain't the only place I can work in K.C. If I can't be late oncein a while without hearin' about it, you can just send up for my time, that's all, see.' I wasn't goin' to let him getaway with that stuff. And just as I thought, he weakened. All he says was, 'Well, just the same, I'm warnin' you. 　　Next time maybe Mr. Tierney'll see you an' then you'll get a chance to try some other store, all right.' He knew hewas bluffing and that I did, too. I had to laugh. An' I saw him laughin' with Mr. Scott about two minutes later. 　　But, gee, I certainly do pull some raw stuff around there at times."By then she and Clyde, with scarcely a word on his part, and much to his ease and relief, had reached Frissell's. 　　And for the first time in his life he had the satisfaction of escorting a girl to a table in such a place. Now he reallywas beginning to have a few experiences worthy of the name. He was quite on edge with the romance of it. 　　Because of her very high estimate of herself, her very emphatic picture of herself as one who was intimate withso many youths and girls who were having a good time, he felt that up to this hour he had not lived at all. Swiftlyhe thought of the different things she had told him--Burkett's on the Big Blue, skating and dancing on the ice-CharlieTrone--the young tobacco clerk with whom she had had the engagement for to-night--Mr. Beck at thestore who was so struck on her that he couldn't bring himself to fire her. And as he saw her order whatever sheliked, without any thought of his purse, he contemplated quickly her face, figure, the shape of her hands, sosuggestive always of the delicacy or roundness of the arm, the swell of her bust, already very pronounced, thecurve of her eyebrows, the rounded appeal of her smooth cheeks and chin. There was something also about the tone of her voice, unctuous, smooth, which somehow appealed to and disturbed him. To him it was delicious. 　　Gee, if he could only have such a girl all for himself! 　　And in here, as without, she clattered on about herself, not at all impressed, apparently, by the fact that she wasdining here, a place that to him had seemed quite remarkable. When she was not looking at herself in a mirror,she was studying the bill of fare and deciding what she liked--lamb with mint jelly--no omelette, no beef--oh,yes, filet of mignon with mushrooms. She finally compromised on that with celery and cauliflower. And shewould like a cocktail. Oh, yes, Clyde had heard Hegglund say that no meal was worth anything without a fewdrinks, so now he had mildly suggested a cocktail. And having secured that and a second, she seemed warmerand gayer and more gossipy than ever. 　　But all the while, as Clyde noticed, her attitude in so far as he was concerned was rather distant--impersonal. Iffor so much as a moment, he ventured to veer the conversation ever so slightly to themselves, his deep personalinterest in her, whether she was really very deeply concerned about any other youth, she threw him off byannouncing that she liked all the boys, really. They were all so lovely--so nice to her. They had to be. When theyweren't, she didn't have anything more to do with them. She "tied a can to them," as she once expressed it. Herquick eyes clicked and she tossed her head defiantly. 　　And Clyde was captivated by all this. Her gestures, her poses, moues and attitudes were sensuous and suggestive. 　　She seemed to like to tease, promise, lay herself open to certain charges and conclusions and then to withholdand pretend that there was nothing to all of this--that she was very unconscious of anything save the mostreserved thoughts in regard to herself. In the main, Clyde was thrilled and nourished by this mere proximity toher. It was torture, and yet a sweet kind of torture. He was full of the most tantalizing thoughts about howwonderful it would be if only he were permitted to hold her close, kiss her mouth, bite her, even. To cover hermouth with his! To smother her with kisses! To crush and pet her pretty figure! She would look at him atmoments with deliberate, swimming eyes, and he actually felt a little sick and weak--almost nauseated. His onedream was that by some process, either of charm or money, he could make himself interesting to her. 　　And yet after going with her to the theater and taking her home again, he could not see that he had made anynoticeable progress. For throughout the performance of "The Corsair" at Libby's, Hortense, who, because of heruncertain interest in him was really interested in the play, talked of nothing but similar shows she had seen, aswell as of actors and actresses and what she thought of them, and what particular youth had taken her. AndClyde, instead of leading her in wit and defiance and matching her experiences with his own, was compelled tocontent himself with approving of her. 　　And all the time she was thinking that she had made another real conquest. And because she was no longervirtuous, and she was convinced that he had some little money to spend, and could be made to spend it on her,she conceived the notion of being sufficiently agreeable--nothing more--to hold him, keep him attentive, ifpossible, while at the same time she went her own way, enjoying herself as much as possible with others andgetting Clyde to buy and do such things for her as might fill gaps--when she was not sufficiently or amusinglyenough engaged elsewhere.        这次相识，在某些人看来，也许太微不足道了，可是对克莱德来说，却是至关重要的大事。截至目前为止，他还没见过如此一位妩媚动人的姑娘竟然向他俯赐青睐……至少他自己就是这样想象的。如今，他终于找到了一位漂亮姑娘，对他很感兴趣，答应陪他一块去吃饭。看戏。也许，她真的是个卖弄风骚的姑娘，和谁都说不上真心相待，也许一开头他还不能指望她就专一于他，不过……谁知道呢? 谁又能说得准呢? 下星期二，她果然遵约，在格林－戴维逊附近第十四街和威恩多特街拐角处跟他见了面。他是那么受宠。那么兴奋。那么狂喜，连自己乱成一团的思想感情，几乎也很难理出个头绪来了。不过，为了表示他与她完全般配，克莱德给自己打扮得几乎太奇特。太华丽了……头发搽了油，系上蝶形领结与崭新丝围巾，脚下穿着短丝袜，使他专门为这次约会买的那双闪闪发亮的棕色皮鞋更为显眼。 不过，当他与霍丹斯再次相见时，她对这些东西到底注意了没有，他就说不准了。因为，她注意的毕竟只是她自个儿的外貌，而不是他的外貌。再说……这是惯用的花招，故意让克莱德久等，直到将近七点钟才来;她的姗姗来迟，使他心情一时间极度沮丧。因为假定说，要是她这些天来对他早已不感兴趣，因而再也不乐意跟他见面呢? 得了，那他当然就不跟她来往了。不过，那也足以证明: 尽管他现在穿上漂亮衣服，也有钱可以挥霍了，可他还是不能让象她那样一个漂亮姑娘发生兴趣。他暗自思忖，他非交一个漂亮的女友不可……如果是不漂亮的，他就不要。拉特勒和赫格伦看来都不计较女友漂亮不漂亮，可是对他来说，那是一种癖好。如果仅仅满足于找到一个不漂亮的姑娘，那他一想到这里，几乎就恶心。 可是此刻，他却伫立在黑黝黝的大街交岔口……四周围许许多多广告招牌和灯光照得几乎令人眩目，成百的过往行人总是来去匆匆，很多人的脸部表情都说明: 他们心里想的是寻欢作乐和约会……而他呢，也许只有他一个人不得不往回走，上别处去……孤零零一个人吃饭，孤零零一个人去看戏，孤零零一个人回家转，然后转天早上再去上班。正当他认定自己倒楣透顶的时候，蓦然间，离这儿不远的地方，从人群里出现了霍丹斯的脸孔和身影。她打扮得很俊俏，身穿一件黑天鹅绒短外套，衣领和袖口是茶色带红，头戴一只圆鼓鼓的天鹅绒苏格兰人宽顶无檐便帽，边上还有一个红色皮扣子;两颊和唇边略敷脂粉口红。 一双眼眸忽闪忽闪的。如同往常一样，她看来还是露出踌躇满志的神气。 "哦，你好，我来晚了，是不是? 我可实在没办法。你看，我忘了还有个约会，那也是我的一个朋友……嘿，还是一个顶呱呱的小伙子;我到六点钟才想起来我有两个约会。天哪，这真叫我为难了。这样，你们两个，我得决定先会见哪一位才行。我正要给你打电话，想改到另一个晚上，忽然想起你六点以后就不在那儿了。汤姆也是六点一过就走了。可查理总在那儿，直到六点半才下班，反正有时候还要晚一些。何况他是个呱呱叫的好小子……从来不发脾气，也不嘀嘀咕咕的。本来他也要带我一块去看戏。吃饭。他是在奥菲亚剧院管香烟摊。 所以，我就给他打了个电话。不用说，他老大不高兴呀。不过，我告诉他说，我会改到另一个晚上同他见面。怎么样，现在你该高兴了吧? 为了你，硬是让查理那样一个漂亮小伙子落空，你说说我对你够意思了吧? "她一眼就看出: 只要她一说到别的小伙子，克莱德眼里马上露出惊恐。嫉妒，而又有点儿惧怕的神色。她一想到自己能使他嫉妒，心里就很高兴。她知道她终于把他征服了。于是，她把脑袋往上一扬，微微一笑，她就跟他在街上一块往前走去。 "你来了，不用说，你是够意思的了，"他很勉强说了这么一句话，尽管她一提到查理这个"呱呱叫的好小子"，似乎使他的嗓子和心儿同时都给梗塞了。这样一个又漂亮。又任性的姑娘……难道说他就掌握不住她吗? "嗨，今儿晚上你真是美极了，"他又勉强地说了一句。他居然能说出这么一句口彩，连自个儿也吃惊。 "你这顶帽子，还有这件外套，太合身了，我真喜欢。 "他两眼直楞楞瞅着她，露出爱慕的闪光，溢满了一种热切的渴望。他很想吻她……吻她那朱唇小口……只是在这里他还不敢，不论在哪儿，谅他也没有这份胆量。 "难怪你有这么多的约会，还得一一回绝呢。你太漂亮了。要不要戴几朵玫瑰花? "这会儿他们正走过一家鲜花铺，他一看见玫瑰花，就想起要送一点东西给她。他听赫格伦说过，女人就喜欢男人给她们献殷勤。 "哦，当然罗，玫瑰花我可喜欢，"她回答说，一面走进鲜花铺。"或者就来点紫罗兰吧。这种花很美。依我看，跟外套相配就更好看啦。"她很高兴，想到克莱德竟然还有买花这种闲情逸致。还有他说了那些恭维她的话。与此同时，她相信他这个小伙子对女人知之甚少，也许压根儿都不了解。她喜欢的是经验比较丰富的年轻人和成年人，既不是这么容易就向她俯首贴耳，也不是那样易如反掌即可掌握住的。不过，她也不能不想到: 克莱德是她所熟知的那些男人中的佼佼者……举止态度比他们文雅些。所以，尽管(在她眼里)他有点儿笨拙，她还是有雅量包涵他……且看他以后怎样。 "哦，这些花真漂亮呀，"她大声嚷嚷说，随手捡起一大束紫罗兰，给自己别在身上。"我说我就戴上吧。"克莱德付钱的时候，她伫立在镜子前骚首弄姿，又按照自己的嗜好，把花儿别别好。直到最后她认为满意了，才转过身来，大声说: "得了，走吧，"随即挽起了他的胳膊。 克莱德对她那副毫不客气的神气不免有点儿吃惊，一时简直不知道再说些什么才好。不过，他也用不着着急……霍丹斯全神贯注的，只是她自个儿罢了。 "嘿，我跟你说，上星期我简直是一晃而过。每天晚上都是舞会，直到转天凌晨三点钟才回家。星期天几乎跳到快要天亮哩。我的天哪，昨儿晚上的舞会，这才够劲儿。你去过伯克特舞厅没有? 就是在吉福德渡口那边的，你知道吗? 哦，那地方可漂亮，离第三十九街比格布罗不太远。夏天跳舞;冬天结了冰，就在室外溜冰，或是在冰上跳舞。还有那个小乐队，可棒极了。"克莱德只顾欣赏她那撅动的小嘴。闪亮的眼睛和迅捷的手势，却很少留意她所说的话。 "华莱士。特朗跟我们在一块……嘿，他这小子真叫人逗死呢……后来我们坐下来吃冰淇淋，他就上厨房去，把自己脸抹黑了，戴上侍者的围裙和大褂，回过来侍候我们。那真是个令人发笑的小鬼。他还用碟子和勺儿耍把戏，真逗人。"克莱德叹了一口气，因为他远不及这个天才特朗那样有天才。 "后来，星期一早上，我们大家回去的时候，差不多快四点了，可我七点还得起来。我简直累得快死了。我差点儿给炒鱿鱼了，要不是店里那些好人，还有那位贝克先生，我包管给炒鱿鱼了。他是我们的部主任，你知道吧，老实说，我真的叫这个可怜的人吃足了苦头。我在店里真是够调皮捣蛋的。有一天，我午后迟到了，另一个姑娘就替我按规定时间在我的考勤卡上打孔，你知道吗，不料这时他正好走了进来，看见了她。后来，已是午后两点钟，他就对我说，' '''' 听我说，布里格斯小姐，(他一向称我布里格斯小姐，因为我不许他叫别的名字。 我要是让他随便叫的话，那他就会乱来一气)' ''''叫别人给你考勤卡上打孔，是不算数的。往后少来这一套。人家都不是傻瓜啊。，我听了只好哈哈大笑起来。尽管有时候他对我们都会发火，可是我照样把他弄得服服帖帖的。所以，他对我多少比较客气，你知道吗……他怎么也不肯开掉我，说真的，他才不乐意呢。我就对他说，' ''''听我说，贝克先生，你可不能用这种口气对我说话。我可不是回回迟到呀。说穿了，偌大的堪萨斯城，我并不是只能在贵处工作。要是偶尔迟到一下，我就得听你唠叨，那你干脆把我送牢房，这就得了，明白吗。，我决不能容忍他用那种口气对我说话。我心里正琢磨着会有啥结果……他却马上软下来了。他只是说: "得了，反正我已警告过你了。下次说不定你要是给蒂尔尼先生瞧见了，那你就得上别的铺子去试试了。，他知道他这是在虚张声势，这一点我也是心照不宣。我只好格格大笑起来。两分钟后，我就看见他跟斯科特先生在一起仰天大笑。不过，说真的，嘿，我有时候也真能逗弄人。"这时候，她跟克莱德终于走到了弗里塞尔酒家;一路上，他几乎没有说话，倒也使他感到很轻松自在。他破天荒头一回感到洋洋得意的，就是他能陪女友到这样阔气的地方去吃饭。说真的，现在他已开始品尝个中况味了。他心里急巴巴地，真想也能沾上一点儿罗曼蒂克情调。由于她对自己估计很高，竭力强调自己同这么多寻欢作乐的年轻男女交往密切，就使他觉得，截至此刻为止，仿佛自己压根儿没过上一天好日子。他马上想到了她刚才对他说过的那些事……在比格布罗附近的伯克特舞厅，在冰上溜冰跳舞……还有查理。特朗……同她约定今晚见面的那个香烟摊的年轻掌柜……还有那位一见她几乎脉脉含情。舍不得开掉她的贝克先生。他眼看着她一点也不考虑到他的钱袋，只按自己口味点菜的时候，赶快端详了一下她的脸蛋。她的身段，以及她的双手从腕到指尖的模样儿，使人一望可知她的整个儿手臂该有多么纤巧圆浑，还有她那高高耸起。丰满的胸脯，她那眉毛的曲线，她那光滑的脸颊和下巴颏儿长得完美的那种魅力。此外，她说话时那种矫揉造作。光滑流畅的声调，也有某种味儿，不知怎的，吸引了他，使他心烦意乱。他觉得，那是很动人的。哎哟哟，老天哪，这样一个姑娘，要是能完全属于他，该有多好! 霍丹斯在这酒家，如同在街上一样，照样唠唠叨叨地谈她自己的事，看来她压根儿没注意到: 此刻她是在克莱德心目中很了不起的这个地方吃饭。当她不是在对镜欣赏自己的时候，她就仔细看菜单，决定点哪些她爱吃的菜……薄荷冻羊肉……不，她不爱吃蛋卷，牛肉她也不爱吃……哦，得了，还有冬菇溜肉片。末了，她又添上了芹菜和花菜。此外，她还想喝点鸡尾酒。哦，是的，克莱德听赫格伦说过，吃饭要是不喝一点酒，就太没意思了，所以，他就毫不迟疑地提议喝一点鸡尾酒。霍丹斯喝完一杯，又喝上一杯之后，仿佛比从前更热和。更快活。更饶舌了。 不过，克莱德注意到，她自始至终同他还是保持一种多少冷淡的……客观的态度。要是他怯生生地想要稍微转换一下话题，谈谈他们两人的关系，以及他对她的一往深情，问问清楚她是不是真的爱上了别的小伙子，她会公开说所有的男朋友真的她都喜欢，一下子就把他给甩了。她说他们都那么可爱……个个都待她那么好。他们非得这样不可。要不然，她就再也不睬他们了。正如有一次她所说，"给他们拴上一个洋铁罐。"(此处意谓霍丹斯玩弄男性，有如美国顽童恶作剧，即常常给狗尾巴拴上一只洋铁罐。)她那活灵灵的眼睛忽闪忽闪，脑袋昂然地晃动着。 克莱德已给这一切迷住了。她的表情。她的佯装。她的颦蹙，乃至于她的姿态，都是富于性感。令人想入非非。看来她喜爱捉弄人，随便允诺，让自己受到某种指控和定评，然后又不肯承认，推说这一切全属子虚乌有……装做她对自己只是极其谨慎以外，好象什么都不知道似的。一般地说，克莱德只要有她这个人在身边，心里就感到激奋。宽慰了。这是一种折磨，但也是一种甜蜜的折磨。他心心念念老是在想，想得干着急了: 他只要能紧紧地搂住她，吻她的嘴，甚至同她咬得紧紧的，该有多美! 用自己的嘴吻她的嘴! 不停地吻她! 紧紧地搂住她风姿绰约的身段，抚爱她! 有时，她那双故意露出泪汪汪的眼睛直望着他，说真的，他感到有点儿疲软无力……几乎产生厌恶。他只是梦想着: 不论自己的魅力或是金钱的威力，他硬是要使她爱上自己。 不过，即使他陪着她看戏，随后再送她回家，克莱德还是看不出有什么显著的进展。在利比剧院看《海盗》演出时，霍丹斯因为对克莱德尚未产生稳定的兴趣，说真的，始终注意剧情发展，她所说的，全是从前她看过的一些类似的剧目，以及她对那些男女演员的评论意见，此外，她还提到是哪个小伙子带她去看戏的。克莱德既然不能拿自己的经历同她试比高低，自然也不敢同她斗智取胜，所以，他就只好随声附和她的意见了。 可是，她自始至终在暗自思忖她眼前的新胜利。因为她一来早就不讲德行，二来知道他好歹有一点钱，而且他又乐意把它花在她身上，所以，她就算计着: 只要可能的话，就抓住他，使他一直巴结奉承她，无非如此而已……那倒也是够痛快的了。与此同时，她不妨照样我行我素，尽管跟别人一块寻欢作乐。赶上她得不到别处足够有趣的邀请，可能出现空档时候，就不妨让克莱德给她买这买那，为她效劳，陪她消愁解闷。

Part 1 Chapter 13 For a period of four months at least this was exactly the way it worked out. After meeting her in this fashion, hewas devoting not an inconsiderable portion of his free time to attempting to interest her to the point where shewould take as much interest in him as she appeared to take in others. At the same time he could not tell whethershe could be made to entertain a singular affection for any one. Nor could he believe that there was only aninnocent camaraderie involved in all this. Yet she was so enticing that he was deliriously moved by the thoughtthat if his worst suspicions were true, she might ultimately favor him. So captivated was he by this savor ofsensuality and varietism that was about her, the stigmata of desire manifest in her gestures, moods, voice, theway she dressed, that he could not think of relinquishing her. 　　Rather, he foolishly ran after her. And seeing this, she put him off, at times evaded him, compelled him tocontent himself with little more than the crumbs of her company, while at the same time favoring him withdescriptions or pictures of other activities and contacts which made him feel as though he could no longer endureto merely trail her in this fashion. It was then he would announce to himself in anger that he was not going to seeher any more. She was no good to him, really. But on seeing her again, a cold indifference in everything she saidand did, his courage failed him and he could not think of severing the tie. 　　She was not at all backward at the same time in speaking of things that she needed or would like to have--littlethings, at first--a new powder puff, a lip stick, a box of powder or a bottle of perfume. Later, and without havingyielded anything more to Clyde than a few elusive and evasive endearments--intimate and languorous recliningsin his arms which promised much but always came to nothing--she made so bold as to indicate to him at differenttimes and in different ways, purses, blouses, slippers, stockings, a hat, which she would like to buy if only shehad the money. And he, in order to hold her favor and properly ingratiate himself, proceeded to buy them, thoughat times and because of some other developments in connection with his family, it pressed him hard to do so. 　　And yet, as he was beginning to see toward the end of the fourth month, he was apparently little farther advancedin her favor than he had been in the beginning. In short, he was conducting a feverish and almost painful pursuitwithout any definite promise of reward. 　　In the meantime, in so far as his home ties went, the irritations and the depressions which were almostinextricably involved with membership in the Griffiths family were not different from what they had ever been. 　　For, following the disappearance of Esta, there had settled a period of dejection which still endured. Only, in sofar as Clyde was concerned, it was complicated with a mystery which was tantalizing and something more-irritating;for when it came to anything which related to sex in the Griffiths family, no parents could possiblyhave been more squeamish. 　　And especially did this apply to the mystery which had now surrounded Esta for some time. She had gone. Shehad not returned. And so far as Clyde and the others knew, no word of any kind had been received from her. 　　However, Clyde had noted that after the first few weeks of her absence, during which time both his mother andfather had been most intensely wrought up and troubled, worrying greatly as to her whereabouts and why she didnot write, suddenly they had ceased their worries, and had become very much more resigned--at least not sotortured by a situation that previously had seemed to offer no hope whatsoever. He could not explain it. It was quite noticeable, and yet nothing was said. And then one day a little later, Clyde had occasion to note that hismother was in communication with some one by mail--something rare for her. For so few were her social orbusiness connections that she rarely received or wrote a letter. 　　One day, however, very shortly after he had connected himself with the Green-Davidson, he had come in ratherearlier than usual in the afternoon and found his mother bending over a letter which evidently had just arrivedand which appeared to interest her greatly. Also it seemed to be connected with something which requiredconcealment. For, on seeing him, she stopped reading at once, and, flustered and apparently nervous, arose andput the letter away without commenting in any way upon what she had been doing. But Clyde for some reason,intuition perhaps, had the thought that it might be from Esta. He was not sure. And he was too far away to detectthe character of the handwriting. But whatever it was, his mother said nothing afterwards concerning it. Shelooked as though she did not want him to inquire, and so reserved were their relations that he would not havethought of inquiring. He merely wondered, and then dismissed it partially, but not entirely, from his mind. 　　A month or five weeks after this, and just about the time that he was becoming comparatively well-schooled inhis work at the Green-Davidson, and was beginning to interest himself in Hortense Briggs, his mother came tohim one afternoon with a very peculiar proposition for her. Without explaining what it was for, or indicatingdirectly that now she felt that he might be in a better position to help her, she called him into the mission hallwhen he came in from work and, looking at him rather fixedly and nervously for her, said: "You wouldn't know,Clyde, would you, how I could raise a hundred dollars right away?"Clyde was so astonished that he could scarcely believe his ears, for only a few weeks before the mere mention ofany sum above four or five dollars in connection with him would have been preposterous. His mother knew that. 　　Yet here she was asking him and apparently assuming that he might be able to assist her in this way. And rightly,for both his clothes and his general air had indicated a period of better days for him. 　　At the same time his first thought was, of course, that she had observed his clothes and goings-on and wasconvinced that he was deceiving her about the amount he earned. And in part this was true, only so changed wasClyde's manner of late, that his mother had been compelled to take a very different attitude toward him and wasbeginning to be not a little dubious as to her further control over him. Recently, or since he had secured this latestplace, for some reason he had seemed to her to have grown wiser, more assured, less dubious of himself, inclinedto go his own way and keep his own counsel. And while this had troubled her not a little in one sense, it ratherpleased her in another. For to see Clyde, who had always seemed because of his sensitiveness and unrest somuch of a problem to her, developing in this very interesting way was something; though at times, and in view ofhis very recent finery, she had been wondering and troubled as to the nature of the company he might bekeeping. But since his hours were so long and so absorbing, and whatever money he made appeared to be goinginto clothes, she felt that she had no real reason to complain. Her one other thought was that perhaps he wasbeginning to act a little selfish--to think too much of his own comfort--and yet in the face of his longdeprivations she could not very well begrudge him any temporary pleasure, either. 　　Clyde, not being sure of her real attitude, merely looked at her and exclaimed: "Why, where would I get ahundred dollars, Ma?" He had visions of his new-found source of wealth being dissipated by such unheard of andinexplicable demands as this, and distress and distrust at once showed on his countenance. 　　"I didn't expect that you could get it all for me," Mrs. Griffiths suggested tactfully. "I have a plan to raise themost of it, I think. But I did want you to help me try to think how I would raise the rest. I didn't want to go toyour father with this if I could help it, and you're getting old enough now to be of some help." She looked atClyde approvingly and interestedly enough. "Your father is such a poor hand at business," she went on, "and hegets so worried at times."She passed a large and weary hand over her face and Clyde was moved by her predicament, whatever it was. Atthe same time, apart from whether he was willing to part with so much or not, or had it to give, he was decidedlycurious about what all this was for. A hundred dollars! Gee whiz! 　　After a moment or two, his mother added: "I'll tell you what I've been thinking. I must have a hundred dollars,but I can't tell you for what now, you nor any one, and you mustn't ask me. There's an old gold watch of yourfather's in my desk and a solid gold ring and pin of mine. Those things ought to be worth twenty-five dollars atleast, if they were sold or pawned. Then there is that set of solid silver knives and forks and that silver platter andpitcher in there"--Clyde knew the keepsakes well--"that platter alone is worth twenty-five dollars. I believe theyought to bring at least twenty or twenty-five together. I was thinking if I could get you to go to some goodpawnshop with them down near where you work, and then if you would let me have five more a week for awhile" (Clyde's countenance fell)--"I could get a friend of mine--Mr. Murch who comes here, you know--toadvance me enough to make up the hundred, and then I could pay him back out of what you pay me. I have aboutten dollars myself."She looked at Clyde as much as to say: "Now, surely, you won't desert me in my hour of trouble," and Clyderelaxed, in spite of the fact that he had been counting upon using quite all that he earned for himself. In fact, heagreed to take the trinkets to the pawnshop, and to advance her five more for the time being until the differencebetween whatever the trinkets brought and one hundred dollars was made up. And yet in spite of himself, hecould not help resenting this extra strain, for it had only been a very short time that he had been earning so much. 　　And here was his mother demanding more and more, as he saw it--ten dollars a week now. Always somethingwrong, thought Clyde, always something needed, and with no assurance that there would not be more suchdemands later. 　　He took the trinkets, carried them to the most presentable pawnshop he could find, and being offered forty-fivedollars for the lot, took it. This, with his mother's ten, would make fifty-five, and with forty-five she couldborrow from Mr. Murch, would make a hundred. Only now, as he saw, it would mean that for nine weeks hewould have to give her ten dollars instead of five. And that, in view of his present aspirations to dress, live andenjoy himself in a way entirely different from what he previously considered necessary, was by no means apleasure to contemplate. Nevertheless he decided to do it. After all he owed his mother something. She had mademany sacrifices for him and the others in days past and he could not afford to be too selfish. It was not decent. 　　But the most enduring thought that now came to him was that if his mother and father were going to look to himfor financial aid, they should be willing to show him more consideration than had previously been shown him. 　　For one thing he ought to be allowed to come and go with more freedom, in so far as his night hours wereconcerned. And at the same time he was clothing himself and eating his meals at the hotel, and that was no smallitem, as he saw it. 　　However, there was another problem that had soon arisen and it was this. Not so long after the matter of thehundred dollars, he encountered his mother in Montrose Street, one of the poorest streets which ran north fromBickel, and which consisted entirely of two unbroken lines of wooden houses and two-story flats and manyunfurnished apartments. Even the Griffiths, poor as they were, would have felt themselves demeaned by thethought of having to dwell in such a street. His mother was coming down the front steps of one of the lesstatterdemalion houses of this row, a lower front window of which carried a very conspicuous card which read"Furnished Rooms." And then, without turning or seeing Clyde across the street, she proceeded to another housea few doors away, which also carried a furnished rooms card and, after surveying the exterior interestedly,mounted the steps and rang the bell. 　　Clyde's first impression was that she was seeking the whereabouts of some individual in whom she wasinterested and of whose address she was not certain. But crossing over to her at about the moment theproprietress of the house put her head out of the door, he heard his mother say: "You have a room for rent?""Yes." "Has it a bath?" "No, but there's a bath on the second floor." "How much is it a week?" "Four dollars.""Could I see it?" "Yes, just step in."Mrs. Griffiths appeared to hesitate while Clyde stood below, not twenty-five feet away, and looked up at her,waiting for her to turn and recognize him. But she stepped in without turning. And Clyde gazed after hercuriously, for while it was by no means inconceivable that his mother might be looking for a room for some one,yet why should she be looking for it in this street when as a rule she usually dealt with the Salvation Army or theYoung Women's Christian Association. His first impulse was to wait and inquire of her what she was doing here,but being interested in several errands of his own, he went on. 　　That night, returning to his own home to dress and seeing his mother in the kitchen, he said to her: "I saw youthis morning, Ma, in Montrose Street.""Yes," his mother replied, after a moment, but not before he had noticed that she had started suddenly as thoughtaken aback by this information. She was paring potatoes and looked at him curiously. "Well, what of it?" sheadded, calmly, but flushing just the same--a thing decidedly unusual in connection with her where he wasconcerned. Indeed, that start of surprise interested and arrested Clyde. 　　"You were going into a house there--looking for a furnished room, I guess.""Yes, I was," replied Mrs. Griffiths, simply enough now. "I need a room for some one who is sick and hasn'tmuch money, but it's not so easy to find either." She turned away as though she were not disposed to discuss thisany more, and Clyde, while sensing her mood, apparently, could not resist adding: "Gee, that's not much of astreet to have a room in." His new work at the Green-Davidson had already caused him to think differently ofhow one should live-- any one. She did not answer him and he went to his room to change his clothes. 　　A month or so after this, coming east on Missouri Avenue late one evening, he again saw his mother in the neardistance coming west. In the light of one of the small stores which ranged in a row on this street, he saw that shewas carrying a rather heavy old-fashioned bag, which had long been about the house but had never been muchused by any one. On sight of him approaching (as he afterwards decided) she had stopped suddenly and turnedinto a hallway of a three-story brick apartment building, and when he came up to it, he found the outside door was shut. He opened it, and saw a flight of steps dimly lit, up which she might have gone. However, he did nottrouble to investigate, for he was uncertain, once he reached this place, whether she had gone to call on some oneor not, it had all happened so quickly. But waiting at the next corner, he finally saw her come out again. Andthen to his increasing curiosity, she appeared to look cautiously about before proceeding as before. It was thisthat caused him to think that she must have been endeavoring to conceal herself from him. But why? 　　His first impulse was to turn and follow her, so interested was he by her strange movements. But he decided laterthat if she did not want him to know what she was doing, perhaps it was best that he should not. At the same timehe was made intensely curious by this evasive gesture. Why should his mother not wish him to see her carrying abag anywhere? Evasion and concealment formed no part of her real disposition (so different from his own). 　　Almost instantly his mind proceeded to join this coincidence with the time he had seen her descending the stepsof the rooming house in Montrose Street, together with the business of the letter he had found her reading, andthe money she had been compelled to raise--the hundred dollars. Where could she be going? What was shehiding? 　　He speculated on all this, but he could not decide whether it had any definite connection with him or any memberof the family until about a week later, when, passing along Eleventh near Baltimore, he thought he saw Esta, orat least a girl so much like her that she would be taken for her anywhere. She had the same height, and she wasmoving along as Esta used to walk. Only, now he thought as he saw her, she looked older. Yet, so quickly hadshe come and gone in the mass of people that he had not been able to make sure. It was only a glance, but on thestrength of it, he had turned and sought to catch up with her, but upon reaching the spot she was gone. Soconvinced was he, however, that he had seen her that he went straight home, and, encountering his mother in themission, announced that he was positive he had seen Esta. She must be back in Kansas City again. He could havesworn to it. He had seen her near Eleventh and Baltimore, or thought he had. Had his mother heard anythingfrom her? 　　And then curiously enough he observed that his mother's manner was not exactly what he thought it should havebeen under the circumstances. His own attitude had been one of commingled astonishment, pleasure, curiosityand sympathy because of the sudden disappearance and now sudden reappearance of Esta. Could it be that hismother had used that hundred dollars to bring her back? The thought had come to him--why or from where, hecould not say. He wondered. But if so, why had she not returned to her home, at least to notify the family of herpresence here? 　　He expected his mother would be as astonished and puzzled as he was--quick and curious for details. Instead, sheappeared to him to be obviously confused and taken aback by this information, as though she was hearing aboutsomething that she already knew and was puzzled as to just what her attitude should be. 　　"Oh, did you? Where? Just now, you say? At Eleventh and Baltimore? Well, isn't that strange? I must speak toAsa about this. It's strange that she wouldn't come here if she is back." Her eyes, as he saw, instead of lookingastonished, looked puzzled, disturbed. Her mouth, always the case when she was a little embarrassed anddisconcerted, worked oddly--not only the lips but the jaw itself. 　　"Well, well," she added, after a pause. "That is strange. Perhaps it was just some one who looked like her."But Clyde, watching her out of the corner of his eye, could not believe that she was as astonished as shepretended. And, thereafter, Asa coming in, and Clyde not having as yet departed for the hotel, he heard themdiscussing the matter in some strangely inattentive and unillumined way, as if it was not quite as startling as ithad seemed to him. And for some time he was not called in to explain what he had seen. 　　And then, as if purposely to solve this mystery for him, he encountered his mother one day passing along SpruceStreet, this time carrying a small basket on her arm. She had, as he had noticed of late, taken to going outregularly mornings and afternoons or evenings. On this occasion, and long before she had had an opportunity tosee him, he had discerned her peculiarly heavy figure draped in the old brown coat which she always wore, andhad turned into Myrkel Street and waited for her to pass, a convenient news stand offering him shelter. Once shehad passed, he dropped behind her, allowing her to precede him by half a block. And at Dalrymple, she crossedto Beaudry, which was really a continuation of Spruce, but not so ugly. The houses were quite old--quondamresidences of an earlier day, but now turned into boarding and rooming houses. Into one of these he saw her enterand disappear, but before doing so she looked inquiringly about her. 　　After she had entered, Clyde approached the house and studied it with great interest. What was his mother doingin there? Who was it she was going to see? He could scarcely have explained his intense curiosity to himself, andyet, since having thought that he had seen Esta on the street, he had an unconvinced feeling that it might havesomething to do with her. There were the letters, the one hundred dollars, the furnished room in Montrose Street. 　　Diagonally across the way from the house in Beaudry Street there was a large-trunked tree, leafless now in thewinter wind, and near it a telegraph pole, close enough to make a joint shadow with it. And behind these he wasable to stand unseen, and from this vantage point to observe the several windows, side and front and ground andsecond floor. Through one of the front windows above, he saw his mother moving about as though she werequite at home there. And a moment later, to his astonishment he saw Esta come to one of their two windows andput a package down on the sill. She appeared to have on only a light dressing gown or a wrap drawn about hershoulders. He was not mistaken this time. He actually started as he realized that it was she, also that his motherwas in there with her. And yet what had she done that she must come back and hide away in this manner? Hadher husband, the man she had run away with, deserted her? 　　He was so intensely curious that he decided to wait a while outside here to see if his mother might not come out,and then he himself would call on Esta. He wanted so much to see her again--to know what this mystery was allabout. He waited, thinking how he had always liked Esta and how strange it was that she should be here, hidingaway in this mysterious way. 　　After an hour, his mother came out, her basket apparently empty, for she held it lightly in her hand. And just asbefore, she looked cautiously about her, her face wearing that same stolid and yet care-stamped expression whichit always wore these days--a cross between an uplifting faith and a troublesome doubt. 　　Clyde watched her as she proceeded to walk south on Beaudry Street toward the Mission. After she was well outof sight, he turned and entered the house. Inside, as he had surmised, he found a collection of furnished rooms,name plates some of which bore the names of the roomers pasted upon them. Since he knew that the southeastfront room upstairs contained Esta, he proceeded there and knocked. And true enough, a light footstep respondedwithin, and presently, after some little delay which seemed to suggest some quick preparation within, the door opened slightly and Esta peeped out--quizzically at first, then with a little cry of astonishment and someconfusion. For, as inquiry and caution disappeared, she realized that she was looking at Clyde. At once sheopened the door wide. 　　"Why, Clyde," she called. "How did you come to find me? I was just thinking of you."Clyde at once put his arms around her and kissed her. At the same time he realized, and with a slight sense ofshock and dissatisfaction, that she was considerably changed. She was thinner--paler--her eyes almost sunken,and not any better dressed than when he had seen her last. She appeared nervous and depressed. One of the firstthoughts that came to him now was where her husband was. Why wasn't he here? What had become of him? Ashe looked about and at her, he noticed that Esta's look was one of confusion and uncertainty, not unmixed with alittle satisfaction at seeing him. Her mouth was partly open because of a desire to smile and to welcome him, buther eyes showed that she was contending with a problem. 　　"I didn't expect you here," she added, quickly, the moment he released her. "You didn't see--" Then she paused,catching herself at the brink of some information which evidently she didn't wish to impart. 　　"Yes, I did, too--I saw Ma," he replied. "That's how I came to know you were here. I saw her coming out justnow and I saw you up here through the window." (He did not care to confess that he had been following andwatching his mother for an hour.) "But when did you get back?" he went on. "It's a wonder you wouldn't let therest of us know something about you. Gee, you're a dandy, you are--going away and staying months and neverletting any one of us know anything. You might have written me a little something, anyhow. We always gotalong pretty well, didn't we?"His glance was quizzical, curious, imperative. She, for her part, felt recessive and thence evasive--uncertain,quite, what to think or say or tell. 　　She uttered: "I couldn't think who it might be. No one comes here. But, my, how nice you look, Clyde. You'vegot such nice clothes, now. And you're getting taller. Mamma was telling me you are working at the Green-Davidson."She looked at him admiringly and he was properly impressed by her notice of him. At the same time he could notget his mind off her condition. He could not cease looking at her face, her eyes, her thin-fat body. And as helooked at her waist and her gaunt face, he came to a very keen realization that all was not well with her. She wasgoing to have a child. And hence the thought recurred to him--where was her husband--or at any rate, the manshe had eloped with. Her original note, according to her mother, had said that she was going to get married. Yetnow he sensed quite clearly that she was not married. She was deserted, left in this miserable room here alone. 　　He saw it, felt it, understood it. 　　And he thought at once that this was typical of all that seemed to occur in his family. Here he was just getting astart, trying to be somebody and get along in the world and have a good time. And here was Esta, after her firstventure in the direction of doing something for herself, coming to such a finish as this. It made him a little sickand resentful. 　　"How long have you been back, Esta?" he repeated dubiously, scarcely knowing just what to say now, for nowthat he was here and she was as she was he began to scent expense, trouble, distress and to wish almost that hehad not been so curious. Why need he have been? It could only mean that he must help. 　　"Oh, not so very long, Clyde. About a month, now, I guess. Not more than that.""I thought so. I saw you up on Eleventh near Baltimore about a month ago, didn't I? Sure I did," he added a littleless joyously--a change that Esta noted. At the same time she nodded her head affirmatively. "I knew I did. Itold Ma so at the time, but she didn't seem to think so. She wasn't as surprised as I thought she would be, though. 　　I know why, now. She acted as though she didn't want me to tell her about it either. But I knew I wasn't wrong."He stared at Esta oddly, quite proud of his prescience in this case. He paused though, not knowing quite whatelse to say and wondering whether what he had just said was of any sense or import. It didn't seem to suggest anyreal aid for her. 　　And she, not quite knowing how to pass over the nature of her condition, or to confess it, either, was puzzledwhat to say. Something had to be done. For Clyde could see for himself that her predicament was dreadful. Shecould scarcely bear the look of his inquiring eyes. And more to extricate herself than her mother, she finallyobserved, "Poor Mamma. You mustn't think it strange of her, Clyde. She doesn't know what to do, you see,really. It's all my fault, of course. If I hadn't run away, I wouldn't have caused her all this trouble. She has so littleto do with and she's always had such a hard time." She turned her back to him suddenly, and her shoulders beganto tremble and her sides to heave. She put her hands to her face and bent her head low--and then he knew that shewas silently crying. 　　"Oh, come now, sis," exclaimed Clyde, drawing near to her instantly and feeling intensely sorry for her at themoment. "What's the matter? What do you want to cry for? Didn't that man that you went away with marry you?"She shook her head negatively and sobbed the more. And in that instant there came to Clyde the realpsychological as well as sociological and biological import of his sister's condition. She was in trouble,pregnant--and with no money and no husband. That was why his mother had been looking for a room. That waswhy she had tried to borrow a hundred dollars from him. She was ashamed of Esta and her condition. She wasashamed of not only what people outside the family would think, but of what he and Julia and Frank mightthink--the effect of Esta's condition upon them perhaps--because it was not right, unmoral, as people saw it. Andfor that reason she had been trying to conceal it, telling stories about it--a most amazing and difficult thing forher, no doubt. And yet, because of poor luck, she hadn't succeeded very well. 　　And now he was again confused and puzzled, not only by his sister's condition and what it meant to him and theother members of the family here in Kansas City, but also by his mother's disturbed and somewhat unmoralattitude in regard to deception in this instance. She had evaded if not actually deceived him in regard to all this,for she knew Esta was here all the time. At the same time he was not inclined to be too unsympathetic in thatrespect toward her--far from it. For such deception in such an instance had to be, no doubt, even where peoplewere as religious and truthful as his mother, or so he thought. You couldn't just let people know. He certainlywouldn't want to let people know about Esta, if he could help it. What would they think? What would they sayabout her and him? Wasn't the general state of his family low enough, as it was? And so, now he stood, staringand puzzled the while Esta cried. And she realizing that he was puzzled and ashamed, because of her, cried the more. 　　"Gee, that is tough," said Clyde, troubled, and yet fairly sympathetic after a time. "You wouldn't have run awaywith him unless you cared for him though--would you?" (He was thinking of himself and Hortense Briggs.) "I'msorry for you, Ess. Sure, I am, but it won't do you any good to cry about it now, will it? There's lots of otherfellows in the world beside him. You'll come out of it all right.""Oh, I know," sobbed Esta, "but I've been so foolish. And I've had such a hard time. And now I've brought allthis trouble on Mamma and all of you." She choked and hushed a moment. "He went off and left me in a hotel inPittsburgh without any money," she added. "And if it hadn't been for Mamma, I don't know what I would havedone. She sent me a hundred dollars when I wrote her. I worked for a while in a restaurant--as long as I could. Ididn't want to write home and say that he had left me. I was ashamed to. But I didn't know what else to do theretoward the last, when I began feeling so bad."She began to cry again; and Clyde, realizing all that his mother had done and sought to do to assist her, feltalmost as sorry now for his mother as he did for Esta--more so, for Esta had her mother to look after her and hismother had almost no one to help her. 　　"I can't work yet, because I won't be able to for a while," she went on. "And Mamma doesn't want me to comehome now because she doesn't want Julia or Frank or you to know. And that's right, too, I know. Of course it is. 　　And she hasn't got anything and I haven't. And I get so lonely here, sometimes." Her eyes filled and she began tochoke again. "And I've been so foolish."And Clyde felt for the moment as though he could cry too. For life was so strange, so hard at times. See how ithad treated him all these years. He had had nothing until recently and always wanted to run away. But Esta haddone so, and see what had befallen her. And somehow he recalled her between the tall walls of the big buildingshere in the business district, sitting at his father's little street organ and singing and looking so innocent and good. 　　Gee, life was tough. What a rough world it was anyhow. How queer things went! 　　He looked at her and the room, and finally, telling her that she wouldn't be left alone, and that he would comeagain, only she mustn't tell his mother he had been there, and that if she needed anything she could call on himalthough he wasn't making so very much, either--and then went out. And then, walking toward the hotel to go towork, he kept dwelling on the thought of how miserable it all was--how sorry he was that he had followed hismother, for then he might not have known. But even so, it would have come out. His mother could not haveconcealed it from him indefinitely. She would have asked for more money eventually maybe. But what a dogthat man was to go off and leave his sister in a big strange city without a dime. He puzzled, thinking now of thegirl who had been deserted in the Green-Davidson some months before with a room and board bill unpaid. Andhow comic it had seemed to him and the other boys at the time--highly colored with a sensual interest in it. 　　But this, well, this was his own sister. A man had thought so little of his sister as that. And yet, try as he would,he could no longer think that it was as terrible as when he heard her crying in the room. Here was this brisk,bright city about him running with people and effort, and this gay hotel in which he worked. That was not so bad. 　　Besides there was his own love affair, Hortense, and pleasures. There must be some way out for Esta. She wouldget well again and be all right. But to think of his being part of a family that was always so poor and so little thought of that things like this could happen to it--one thing and another--like street preaching, not being able topay the rent at times, his father selling rugs and clocks for a living on the streets--Esta running away and comingto an end like this. Gee!        就象以上所说的情况，至少持续了四个月。克莱德同她初次相识以后，便一直在用他大部分的闲暇竭力设法让她如同眼下看上去她对待别的小伙子那样对他感到兴趣。与此同时，他既说不准她到底会不会对哪一个人有真诚的感情，也不能相信她与他之间只存在一种天真无邪的朋友关系。不过话又说回来，她毕竟是那么迷人，使他糊里糊涂地认为: 要是他的猜想正确的话，最后也许她会喜欢他的。霍丹斯身上诱出一种富于性感和瞬息多变的味儿，以及她通过种种姿势。脾气。声调和服饰所显示出的一腔情欲，已使他如此迷恋不已，说实在的，他舍不得抛弃她。 一句话，他是一个劲儿傻追她。她呢，一见此状，索性把他扔在一边，有时候躲着他，使他最多只能跟她一块玩玩。与此同时，她还情愿讲给他听自己和别的一些小伙子的交际活动，让他觉得自己再也无法继续只用这样的方式追求她了。一气之下，他居然对自己发誓说，从此以后再也不去看她了。说实话，他同她交往，原是一点儿好处都没有的。可是下次又见到了她，只见她的一言一行，一招一式，依然是冷冰冰。不好不坏的样子，他的勇气也就倏忽不见了……同她断绝往来，他实在想也不敢想。 与此同时，凡是她需要的东西，或是心里想的东西，都给克莱德讲了，一点儿都不害臊……开头是一些小玩意儿……比方说，一只新粉扑。一支口红。 一盒香粉，或是一瓶香水。后来呢，尽管她对克莱德只不过表示一两回躲躲闪闪。半推半就的亲昵行为……情意绵绵地偎在他怀里，这种动作看起来好象大有希望，但事实上常常让他落了空……她照样有胆量，敢于在不同的时间，以不同的方式，向他提到过什么钱包。罩衫。拖鞋。长袜。帽子等东西，说她要是有钱的话就要买。而他呢，为了继续讨好她。巴结她，也就去买了，虽然有时家里有事要用钱，他手头实在也是抠得够紧的。不过，到了第四个月月底，他才开始明白: 她对他的好感，同他们刚开始相识时相比，显然没有什么进步。 一句话，他正在进行一场热烈。几乎是痛苦的追求，但又没有什么明确的。可望成功的预兆。 再说说他的家吧，格里菲思一家如今陷入烦躁和抑郁之中，几乎不可自拔，同过去毫无二致。因为爱思达失踪以后，一家人至今依然心情沮丧。只不过克莱德的情况更要复杂，还有一种让他们感到难过，乃至于恼火的神秘感。因为在格里菲思家里，只要一涉及性的问题，天底下父母的态度就数格里菲思夫妇最富有神经质的了。 这一点，在环绕着爱思达的秘密上特别能看出问题。她出走了，至今也没有回来。克莱德与弟妹们好歹知道，家里一直没有得到任何有关她的信息。不过，克莱德注意到，她失踪后头几个星期里，父母特别焦急不安，非常揪心的是: 她究竟上哪儿去了，为什么她不写信来。后来不知怎的，他们突然不再忧心忡忡了，变得好象完全听天由命似的……至少不象前一时期因为看来毫无希望而感到无比苦恼了。个中道理他说不上来。这一转变已是很明显的，也没有人对此作过任何说明。稍后，克莱德注意到，有一天母亲跟一个人在通信……这在她是很少见的。因为她结交的朋友和业务联系都很少，平时极其难得收到或则寄发一封信。 可是，他到格林－戴维逊大酒店后没多久，有一天下午，他比往常回家早些，发现母亲正低着头看信。信显然是刚收到的，看来对她来说非常重要。也好象同某一件必须保密的事有联系。因为她一见到他，就马上不看了，脸涨得绯红，显然很慌张不安，站起来把信收了起来，压根儿也没说她刚才在看什么。 不过，出于某种原因，也许就是所谓直觉吧，克莱德认为这封信说不定是爱思达寄来的。可他又说不准。毕竟他站得太远，没法看清笔迹。不过，不管怎么说吧，母亲后来就没有向他再提这件事。瞧她那种神色好象并不希望他多问，何况他们之间的关系那样拘谨，他也不会想到再去问她。他只是在心中暗自纳闷，后来把这件事几乎(但不是全部)忘得一干二净了。 又过了一个月或是五个星期，正当他在格林－戴维逊工作干得比较熟练，开始喜欢霍丹斯。布里格斯的时候，有一天下午，母亲突然向他提出了一个很怪的问题。他刚下班回来，她就把他叫到传道馆大厅，既没有说明为什么叫他来，也没有直截了当地说明她觉得他现在已有力量给她一点帮助，而是两眼直勾勾地盯着他，忐忑不安地对他说: "克莱德，你知道不知道，叫我怎能马上就敛到一百块美元? "克莱德听了大吃一惊，几乎不相信自己的耳朵。因为，就在一两个星期以前，仅仅向他提出四五块美元以上的数目，也还被看成是要不得的。他母亲想必也明白。可如今，她一开口这样问他，显然以为他或许能助她一臂之力。不错，反正他的衣着打扮和他整个派头，就说明他已过上好日子了。 当时，他首先想到的，不消说，就是他的衣着打扮和他的举止品行……母亲早已看在眼里，并且认为他把自己的收入对她瞒着不说。这固然有一部分也是实情，不过，最近克莱德态度大变，母亲也不得不对他采取一种较前截然不同的态度，同时，对她往后能不能管得住他，也不免开始有点儿犯疑。近来，也可以说，打从他觅到这个新事由以来，她觉得，出于某种原因，看来他好象变得聪明些，信心多了些，自卑感少了，喜欢我行我素，自作主张。儿子这些表现，使她感到困惑不安，但又暗自高兴。因为，克莱德敏感而又心不定的天性，似乎一向是她猜摸不透的大问题，如今看到他能往自立方向发展，自然也很不错;固然有时候，见他最近身上服饰打扮过于漂亮了，她心里不免感到困惑，怀疑他莫非交上了什么样儿的朋友。不过，反正他的工作时间很长，又很费精神，而且他挣的钱，看来都已花在衣服上了，她觉得确实找不出理由来发牢骚的。她脑际忽然又闪过一个念头: 他也许开始有点儿自私……对自己的舒适享受想得太多了……不过，想到他长期以来过着苦日子，如今他偶尔想要乐一乐，反正她也不好意思责备他。 克莱德还闹不明白她真正的意图何在，只是两眼直瞅着，大声嚷道: "哦，叫我上哪儿去寻摸这一百块美元，妈呀? "他心里琢磨着他找到的财源，很可能被这一前所未闻而又莫名其妙的要求消耗殆尽，他脸上顿时露出苦恼和怀疑的神色。 "我并不指望我要的整笔钱都叫你去寻摸，"格里菲思太太很委婉地说。"我有一个计划，我想，可以敛到大部分的钱。不过，我的确要你帮我出出主意，看不足部分叫我怎么去张罗。反正我只要有一点儿办法，决不乐意找你父亲去说。何况如今你也长大了，可以给我帮点忙了。"她露出一种赞许而又感兴趣的神情望着克莱德。"你父亲做生意没能耐，"她接下去又说，"此外，近来他把心也给操碎了。"这时，她那疲乏的大手正从她脸上掠过，克莱德对她如今陷入困境，深为同情，只是不知道这究竟是怎么回事。先不说他是否乐意拿出这么一笔钱来，或者也可以说，他是否拿得出这么一笔钱来，反正他对这件事的底细怀有很强的好奇心。一百块美元! 数目可不小! 不一会儿，他母亲又接下去说: "我可把我心里一直琢磨着的事全告诉了你呗。我必须弄到一百块美元，可是干什么用的，现在我还不能告诉你，或是告诉任何人，你也不必追问我。我的桌子里有你父亲的一块老式金表，此外还有我的一只赤金戒指和别针。这些东西要是拿出去卖了，或是抵押了的话，至少值二十五块美元。再说，还有那套纯银刀叉和银碟子。银壶"……这些纪念品克莱德本来就熟悉……"单是那些银碟子，就值二十五块美元。我相信这些东西合在一块，少说也值二十到二十五块美元。我心里在琢磨，你能不能把这些东西交到你大酒店附近哪一家当铺去，此外，我说，你能不能暂时每星期多交给我五块美元。"(克莱德马上脸一沉)……"我不妨找我的一个朋友……常来我们传道馆的默奇先生，你是认识的……可以把钱先交给我，凑足一百块美元，将来你给我的钱，我就可以拿来归还他。我自己手头还有十块美元。"她两眼直望着克莱德，好象说: "哦，目前我有困难，你当然不会看着我不管。 "克莱德心也软下来了，尽管他原来想把挣来的钱差不多全给自己花消。事实上，他同意把这几件小玩意儿送当铺去，并在当铺给的钱与一百块美元的差额还没有偿还以前，暂时多给五块美元。不过，他对这个额外的要求，还是情不自禁感到忿忿不平，因为他仅仅是在不久前才挣到了这么多钱。而且依他看，母亲提出要求越来越多了……如今每星期要十块美元。克莱德心想，家里老是出岔错，短这个。缺那个，说不定以后准会又提出一些什么新要求来。 他拿着这些小玩意儿，送进了他找到的最殷实的一家当铺，按物开价，四十五块美元，他就如数收讫了。这笔钱，连同母亲的十块美元，就是五十五块美元，再加上她向默奇先生暂借的四十五块美元，总共一百块美元。他想了一想，这也就是说，今后有九个星期他每星期就得给她十块美元，而不是五块美元。现在他老是巴不得自己生活享受，乃至于穿着打扮，都要跟从前迥然不同，所以，他一想到这里，自然是极不愉快的。不过，他还是决定满足母亲的要求。 他毕竟应对母亲有所报恩的。过去，母亲为了他和弟妹们作出了许多牺牲，他可不能太自私了。要知道那是要不得的。 不过，现在他脑海里有一个萦绕不去的想法，那就是: 父母既然向他求援要钱，就应该对他比从前更加关心体贴才好。先讲一件事吧，就以他晚上回家时间来说，他来去好歹都应该享有更多自由。何况现在他穿着是自己买的，吃饭由酒店包了，依他看，那笔花消也不小啊。 可是不久突然发生了另一个问题。原来是这样的: 就在筹措一百块美元以后不久，他在蒙特罗斯街上遇见了他母亲。那是本城最穷的街道之一，位于比克尔街以北，两旁是鳞次栉比的木头房子。两层楼出租房子，和许多不带家具的小公寓房子。格里菲思一家人穷固然穷，要是一想到住在这样的一条穷街上，也会觉得有失自己身份。这时，他母亲正从这一排房子中还算不上破烂透顶的一户人家台阶上拾级而下，这所房子底楼窗上挂着一块显眼的牌子，写着: "备有家具的房间出租"。那时候，没有转过身来，没有看见克莱德正穿过街道，她径直向隔开一两户人家的另一座房子走去，那里也挂着备有家具的房间出租的牌子。她上下打量了一下房子的外表，就顺着台阶拾级而上，按了一下门铃。 克莱德开头以为母亲是在寻访一个什么人，可是住址她记不确切了。不过，当他正在过街朝她走去的时候，女房东把头探出门外，他听见母亲开口问: "你有房间出租吗? ""有的。""有浴室吗? ""没有。不过二楼有一个浴室。""每星期房租多少? ""四块美元。""我可以看一看吗? ""当然罗，里请。"格里菲思太太好象迟疑了一会儿。这时，克莱德已伫立在下面，离她不到二十五英尺，正抬头直望着她，等待她转过身认出他来。不过，她并没有转身，就走进去了。克莱德一时感到好奇，两眼直盯着她。本来嘛，母亲给别人寻摸房子，也是不足为奇的，不过，按说她常去救世军或则基督教女青年会，现在怎么去这条穷街寻摸呢。开头他想在这里等一下，问母亲来这里干什么的，无奈有几件事急着要办，他就走了。 当天晚上，他回家换衣服，看见母亲在厨房里，就开口问她: "今儿早上，妈，我看见你在蒙特罗斯街上。""是的，"过了半晌，母亲才回答，不过，他发觉她大吃一惊，好象这个消息一下子把她怔住了。这在过去他是从没见过的。她正在削土豆皮，不觉好奇地望了他一眼。"哦，那怎么啦? "她找补着说，虽然从容自若，但脸上还是唰地涨红了。据他揣测，这事对她来说肯定异乎寻常。她那惊惧的神色，不用说，引起了克莱德的注意。"你走进了一户人家，依我看，是去寻摸一个备有家具的房间吧。""是的，我正是去寻摸呢，"格里菲思太太回答说。直到此刻，她才说得就这么简而明了。"有个人得了病，又没有钱，我得给他寻摸一个房间。不过，这事也不太容易寻摸。"她一转身就走了，好象不想再谈下去似的。克莱德虽然一眼看透了她的心情，看来还是情不自禁又添上了一句: "唉，这样一条街上，哪能寻摸到房子呢。"反正他在格林－戴维逊大酒店的新工作，早就促使他形成一种与前迥然不同的人生观。母亲并没有答话，他也就到自己房间换衣服去了。 约莫一个月以后，有一天晚上，他在密苏里大街上正往东走去，又见他母亲从不远的地方迎面走来。借着街上一长溜小铺里不知是哪一家的灯光，他看见她手里拎着一个相当沉的老式手提包(这个手提包一直搁在家里，长期废置不用)。她一见他走过来(正如后来他这样回想道)，就突然停住，拐进一座三层楼砖砌公寓房子的门廊，等他走了过去，大门已给关上了。他把门打开，看见昏暗灯光下有一段楼梯，也许她就拾级而上了。不过，他到这里以后，还没有进一步调查，因为他始终说不准: 她是不是进去访客的，而且这一切来得又是那么迅雷不及掩耳。不过，他躲在附近一个拐角处等着，终于看见她走出来了。看来她就象刚来时那样，小心翼翼地先往四下里扫了一眼才走的，这使他越发感到好奇了。因此，他心中暗自思忖，一定是她故意躲避，不让他看见的。可是为什么呢? 他脑际掠过头一个闪念，就是想转过身来跟她走，因为他对她那些奇怪的行动相当惊奇。后来，他转念一想，要是她不希望他知道她现在所做的事，也许还是少管闲事为好。不过，瞧她那副躲躲闪闪的德行，不由得使他更加感到好奇。为什么他母亲不愿他看见自己拎着手提包上某个地方呢? 如此鬼鬼祟祟。 躲躲闪闪的作风，是不符合她的秉性(他自己的秉性，却与妈妈大相径庭)。他心里马上就把这次邂逅，同上次见到妈在蒙特罗斯街一所出租房子拾级而下，以及见到妈在看信的事和四出筹措一百块美元的事通通联系在一块儿了。妈到底上哪儿去的? 她要捂着的，究竟又是什么事呢? 他对这一切进行了种种猜测，但他还是不能断定这件事同他本人或是家里哪个人有一定联系。约莫一星期后，他走过巴尔的摩街附近的第十一街，觉得好象看见了爱思达，或者至少是一个活脱脱跟她一模一样的姑娘，不论在哪儿见到，都会把她当做爱思达: 她的身材与走路的姿势，也跟爱思达毫无二致。不过，克莱德觉得这一回看见，仿佛她显得老相些。她来去匆匆，在人群中一晃就消失了，他来不及看清楚，是不是真的爱思达。虽然仅仅是匆匆一瞥，但是好象两眼突然豁亮似的，他一转过身，想要赶上她，谁知道当他走近的时候，她早已不见影儿了。不过，他深信，没错儿，他见到了她，径直回家转，在传道馆遇到母亲，就说他肯定看见爱思达了。她准定又回到堪萨斯城了。他可以指着老天爷起誓说，他是在第十一街和巴尔的摩街附近看见她的，至少他认为他看见的是她。他母亲有没有听说过有关她的消息呢? 说来也真怪，他觉得，他母亲听了这个消息后，她的态度正是他始料所不及。至于他自己对爱思达的突然失踪和如今又突然出现，真可以说是百感交集: 惊讶。高兴。好奇和同情。也许母亲就是用那一百块美元把她接回来的? 他心中忽然掠过这么一个闪念……至于他为什么会有这个闪念，这个闪念又是从哪儿来的，他就说不清了。他心里只是暗自纳闷。不过果真是这样的话，那末，她为什么不回到自己家里呢? 至少也得通知一声家里，说她已经回来了。 他原来以为母亲一定会象他那样大吃一惊和迷惑不解……急急乎要想打听个仔细。殊不知适得其反，他觉得，母亲听了这个消息，显得很窘困，茫然不知所措，好象她听到的，正是她早已知道的事，真不知道此刻她该如何表态才好。 "哦，你真的看见了? 是在哪儿? 你说刚才吗? 是在第十一街和巴尔的摩街拐角处? 哦，这不是很怪吗? 这事我可一定要告诉阿萨。要是她回来了，可又不来家里，那才怪呢。"他看到她眼里显露出的不是惊异，而是困惑不安的神色。她的嘴如同她平时茫然失措。陷入窘境时那样奇怪地翕动着……不仅仅嘴唇，甚至连牙床也在抖索着。 "唔，唔，"过了半晌，她找补着说。"这事也真怪呀。也许是哪一个姑娘的模样儿长得很象她吧。"可是，克莱德用眼梢乜着她，不相信她真象她佯装的那样惊诧。后来，阿萨进来了，克莱德还没有动身上酒店去。他听见他们谈这件事的时候很冷淡，好象满不在乎似的，根本不象他意料之中那么吃惊。过了片刻才叫他进去，把他所看见的情况详细谈谈。 后来，仿佛有意让他解开这个谜似的，有一天，他恰巧遇见母亲正在斯普鲁斯街上走，这次她胳臂上挽着一只小篮子。最近他注意到，她总是有规则地在早上。午后或是傍晚外出。这一回，她还没来得及看到他，他却早已瞧见了她那粗壮得出奇的身形，穿着她老是穿的那件棕色旧外套。他就踅进了默克尔街，等她走过，那里正有一个报摊，好歹让他隐蔽一下。她一走过，他就尾随她后面，两人相隔半排房子的距离。她在达尔林普尔街拐进博德里街……其实就是斯普鲁斯街延伸出来的，不过倒也并不太丑陋。那一带房子很旧……都是早年的旧宅，现已改成供膳。备有家具的出租房子。他看见她走进了其中的一所，倏忽就不见了。不过，她在进门前，照例往四下里张望了一下。 待她进门后，克莱德就走到那所房子跟前，仔细打量了一番。他母亲上这儿来干什么的? 她看望的是谁? 为什么他会产生那么大的好奇心，连他自个儿都说不清。不过，从他好象在街上看见过爱思达的那时起，他心里总是模模糊糊地感到: 所有这一切也许跟她有点儿关系。此外还有那些信。那一百块美元，以及蒙特罗斯街上备有家具的出租房子。 博德里街那所房子斜对面，有一棵躯干壮硕的大树，如今在冬天的寒风里，树叶早已枯凋殆尽。树旁有一根电线杆，两者紧傍在一块，他伫立在后面，人们就看不见他。而他利用这个有利的角度，却可以看到这所房子好几个窗口，边上的。临街的。底楼的和二楼的。他抬头仰望楼上一个临街的窗子，只见他母亲正走来走去，好象已是熟不拘礼似的。过了半晌，他猛地吃一惊，居然看见爱思达走到两窗之中的一个窗口，把一包东西放在窗台上。她好象身上只穿一件淡色晨衣，要不是披着一块披肩吧。这一回，他准没有看错。他认出了就是她，还有他母亲跟她在一块，真的叫他大吃一惊。不过话又说回来，她究竟做过了什么事，使她不得不要回来，而且还得这样躲避家人呢? 难道说她丈夫，也就是跟她私奔的那个人，已经把她抛弃了吗? 他急急乎想把事情底细闹清楚，就决定在户外等候片刻，看他母亲是不是会出来，随后他自己看望爱思达去。他心里恨不得再见到她……很想一下子识破这个秘密。他等呀等，心里一直在暗想: 他一向喜欢爱思达，可是如今她来到这儿，鬼鬼祟祟地躲了起来，好不奇怪! 过了一个钟头，他母亲出来了，她的那只篮子，显然已经空了，因为她拎在手里好象毫不费力似的。她如同刚来时一样，小心翼翼地往四下里张望了一下，脸上露出最近以来常有的迟钝但又忧心忡忡的神色……一种崇高的信仰和恼人的疑虑的混合物。 她正沿着博德里街往南向传道馆走去，克莱德两眼直楞楞地望着她。等到看不见她的影儿以后，他才转过身来，走进了这所房子，里面正如他原先猜想的那样，他看见了好几个备有家具的房间。有一些房间，门上的牌子贴着房客的名字。他早已知道爱思达住在楼上东南角临街的一间，也就径直走去，敲了一下门。果真没有错儿，只听见室内一阵轻轻的脚步声，又过了一会儿，不用说，里面正匆忙拾掇一下，然后房门轻轻地开了，隙着一条缝，爱思达探出头来张望……先是惶悚，继而惊恐不安，轻轻地喊了一声。她定神一看，原来就是克莱德，所以也用不着探询和小心提防了。她马上把房门敞开。 "哦，克莱德，"她大声嚷嚷说。"你怎么会找到我的? 我正好在惦着你呀。"克莱德马上拥抱她，吻她。这时，他发觉她变化相当大，不免感到有点儿惊诧。不满。她比前时瘦……苍白……眼窝几乎深陷，身上穿得也不比她出走前好。她显然紧张不安，心情抑郁。此刻他脑海里闪过头一个闪念，就是她丈夫在哪儿呢。为什么他不在这儿? 他现在怎么啦? 克莱德举目四顾，又把她仔细端详一番，发现爱思达露出慌乱不安的神色，当然还是相当高兴同弟弟重逢。她的嘴唇微微翕动，因为她想笑一笑，表示欢迎，不过，从她那双眼睛看得出她心里正在竭力解决一个难题。 "我想不到会在这里见到你，"他一松手，她马上找补着说。"你没看见……"她说了半句就顿住了，差一点儿把一个她不乐意公开的消息说漏了嘴。 "是的，当然，我也看见了……我看见妈了，"他回答说。"所以我才知道你住在这儿。我刚看见她走出来，还有，我从窗口看见你在这儿。"(可他不承认自己跟踪监视母亲已有一个钟头了)"不过，你什么时候回来的? "他接下去说。"干吗你不让我们弟妹知道你的事儿，真怪。嘿，你可敢情好啊，一走几个月……音信全无。你好歹也得给我写个短信啊。我们俩一向志趣相投，是不是? "他两眼直望着她，露出多疑。好奇和恳求的神色。她呢，先是竭力回避，继而闪烁其词，真不知道该想些什么，或者说些什么，或者告诉他些什么。 她终于开口说: "我还不知道敲门的是谁呢。谁都没有来过这儿。不过，我的老天哪，瞧你多神气，克莱德。现在，你穿上漂亮衣服啦。你个儿也长高啦。 妈告诉我，说你现在格林－戴维逊工作。"她不胜艳羡地望着他。克莱德也定神凝视着她，感触很深，同时对她的遭际始终不能忘怀。他一个劲儿望着她的脸庞。她的眼眸，以及她那消瘦的身躯。 当他一看到她的腰肢和她憔悴的脸儿，马上感到她的情况不妙。她快要生孩子啦。因此，他突然心里又想到: 她的丈夫……至少可以说，那个跟她私奔的人……现在哪儿呢? 据母亲说，当初她留下的便条上说她就是结婚去的。可是，他现在才闹明白她还没有结过婚呢。她被遗弃了，孤零零地住在这寒碜的房间里。这一点他已看见了，感到了，而且也明白了。 他马上想到，这就是他一家人生活遭遇中最典型的事件。他刚开始独立生活，很想做一个了不起的人物，在社会上发迹，过上快活的日子。爱思达也作过这样尝试: 她为了自己想出人头地，头一次冒着这么大的风险，最后却得到这样一个结局。这不免使他感到有点儿伤心和愤懑。 "你回来多久了，爱思达? "他迟疑不定地一再问道。他几乎也不知道现在该说些什么才好，因为，既然他已经来了，看到她目前境况，他就开始觉察到随之而来新的开销。麻烦和苦难，真是悔不该当初自己太好奇了。他干吗急急乎赶到这儿来呢? 如今，当然罗，他非得帮助不可。 "哦，还没有多久，克莱德。到现在，我想，将近一个月，不会更多的。 ""我也这么想的。大约一个月前，我看见你在巴尔的摩街附近第十一街上走过，对吗? 当然罗，我看见的就是你，"他说话时已不象开头那样高兴……这一变化爱思达也注意到了。这时，她点了点头，表示肯定。"我知道，我看见你了。 当时，我跟妈说了，可她好象不同意。而且，她并没有象我预料的那样吃惊。 个中原委，现在我才明白啦。她的一言一行，好象也不乐意我跟她谈这件事似的。不过，我知道我并没有看错。"他两眼直瞅着爱思达，样子怪怪的。他对这件事居然有先见之明，不禁感到相当得意。不过，这时他又为之语塞了，真不知道再说些什么才好，同时，心里也在纳闷刚才自己说的这些话是不是有什么意义，或则包含什么重要性。看来这些话未必对她会有什么实际帮助。 而她呢，简直不知道该怎么办: 把自己的实际情况只字不提呢，还是全都向他坦白承认，所以，她就不知道说些什么才好。不过好歹也得说一点呗。反正克莱德一望可知，她目前的窘境委实是很可怕的。他那多疑的眼色，简直使她受不了。后来，与其说给母亲，还不如说给自己解围，她终于开口说: "可怜的妈。 你千万别以为她行动奇怪，克莱德。你知道，说实话，她也不知道该怎么办。 当然，一切全是我的错。当初我要是没有出走，也就不会让她吃足苦头。她本来就不怎么会跟这类事打交道的，而且她一向过的是苦日子。"她猛地背过身去，她的肩膀开始颤抖，腰部也在起伏。她两手捂住脸，低下头来……他知道，她在悄没声儿抽噎了。 "哦，你怎么啦，姐姐，"克莱德大声嚷道，马上走到她身旁，这会儿替她感到非常难过。"你这是怎么回事?

Part 1 Chapter 14 The result of all this on Clyde was to cause him to think more specifically on the problem of the sexes than heever had before, and by no means in any orthodox way. For while he condemned his sister's lover for thusruthlessly deserting her, still he was not willing to hold her entirely blameless by any means. She had gone offwith him. As he now learned from her, he had been in the city for a week the year before she ran away with him,and it was then that he had introduced himself to her. The following year when he returned for two weeks, it wasshe who looked him up, or so Clyde suspected, at any rate. And in view of his own interest in and moodregarding Hortense Briggs, it was not for him to say that there was anything wrong with the sex relation in itself. 　　Rather, as he saw it now, the difficulty lay, not in the deed itself, but in the consequences which followed uponnot thinking or not knowing. For had Esta known more of the man in whom she was interested, more of whatsuch a relationship with him meant, she would not be in her present pathetic plight. Certainly such girls asHortense Briggs, Greta and Louise, would never have allowed themselves to be put in any such position as Esta. 　　Or would they? They were too shrewd. And by contrast with them in his mind, at least at this time, she suffered. 　　She ought, as he saw it, to have been able to manage better. And so, by degrees, his attitude toward her hardenedin some measure, though his feeling was not one of indifference either. 　　But the one influence that was affecting and troubling and changing him now was his infatuation for HortenseBriggs--than which no more agitating influence could have come to a youth of his years and temperament. Sheseemed, after his few contacts with her, to be really the perfect realization of all that he had previously wishedfor in a girl. She was so bright, vain, engaging, and so truly pretty. Her eyes, as they seemed to him, had a kindof dancing fire in them. She had a most entrancing way of pursing and parting her lips and at the same timelooking straightly and indifferently before her, as though she were not thinking of him, which to him was bothflame and fever. It caused him, actually, to feel weak and dizzy, at times, cruelly seared in his veins with minuteand wriggling threads of fire, and this could only be described as conscious lust, a torturesome and yetunescapable thing which yet in her case he was unable to prosecute beyond embracing and kissing, a form ofreserve and respect in regard to her which she really resented in the very youths in whom she sought to inspire it. 　　The type of boy for whom she really cared and was always seeking was one who could sweep away all suchpsuedo-ingenuousness and superiorities in her and force her, even against herself, to yield to him. 　　In fact she was constantly wavering between actual like and dislike of him. And in consequence, he was inconstant doubt as to where he stood, a state which was very much relished by her and yet which was neverpermitted to become so fixed in his mind as to cause him to give her up entirely. After some party or dinner ortheater to which she had permitted him to take her, and throughout which he had been particularly tactful--nottoo assertive--she could be as yielding and enticing in her mood as the most ambitious lover would have liked. 　　And this might last until the evening was nearly over, when suddenly, and at her own door or the room or houseof some girl with whom she was spending the night, she would turn, and without rhyme or reason, endeavor to dismiss him with a mere handclasp or a thinly flavored embrace or kiss. At such times, if Clyde was foolishenough to endeavor to force her to yield the favors he craved, she would turn on him with the fury of a spitefulcat, would tear herself away, developing for the moment, seemingly, an intense mood of opposition which shecould scarcely have explained to herself. Its chief mental content appeared to be one of opposition to beingcompelled by him to do anything. And, because of his infatuation and his weak overtures due to his inordinatefear of losing her, he would be forced to depart, usually in a dark and despondent mood. 　　But so keen was her attraction for him that he could not long remain away, but must be going about to wheremost likely he would encounter her. Indeed, for the most part these days, and in spite of the peculiar climaxwhich had eventuated in connection with Esta, he lived in a keen, sweet and sensual dream in regard to her. Ifonly she would really come to care for him. At night, in his bed at home, he would lie and think of her--herface--the expressions of her mouth and eyes, the lines of her figure, the motions of her body in walking ordancing--and she would flicker before him as upon a screen. In his dreams, he found her deliciously near him,pressing against him--her delightful body all his--and then in the moment of crisis, when seemingly she wasabout to yield herself to him completely, he would awake to find her vanished--an illusion only. 　　Yet there were several things in connection with her which seemed to bode success for him. In the first place,like himself, she was part of a poor family--the daughter of a machinist and his wife, who up to this very timehad achieved little more than a bare living. From her childhood she had had nothing, only such gew-gaws andfripperies as she could secure for herself by her wits. And so low had been her social state until very recently thatshe had not been able to come in contact with anything better than butcher and baker boys--the rathercommonplace urchins and small job aspirants of her vicinity. Yet even here she had early realized that she couldand should capitalize her looks and charm--and had. Not a few of these had even gone so far as to steal in orderto get money to entertain her. 　　After reaching the age where she was old enough to go to work, and thus coming in contact with the type of boyand man in whom she was now interested, she was beginning to see that without yielding herself too much, butin acting discreetly, she could win a more interesting equipment than she had before. Only, so truly sensual andpleasure-loving was she that she was by no means always willing to divorce her self-advantages from herpleasures. On the contrary, she was often troubled by a desire to like those whom she sought to use, and percontra, not to obligate herself to those whom she could not like. 　　In Clyde's case, liking him but a little, she still could not resist the desire to use him. She liked his willingness tobuy her any little thing in which she appeared interested--a bag, a scarf, a purse, a pair of gloves--anything thatshe could reasonably ask or take without obligating herself too much. And yet from the first, in her smart, trickyway, she realized that unless she could bring herself to yield to him--at some time or other offer him the definitereward which she knew he craved--she could not hold him indefinitely. 　　One thought that stirred her more than anything else was that the way Clyde appeared to be willing to spend hismoney on her she might easily get some quite expensive things from him--a pretty and rather expensive dress,perhaps, or a hat, or even a fur coat such as was then being shown and worn in the city, to say nothing of goldearrings, or a wrist watch, all of which she was constantly and enviously eyeing in the different shop windows. 　　One day not so long after Clyde's discovery of his sister Esta, Hortense, walking along Baltimore Street near its junction with Fifteenth--the smartest portion of the shopping section of the city--at the noon hour--with DorisTrine, another shop girl in her department store, saw in the window of one of the smaller and less exclusive furstores of the city, a fur jacket of beaver that to her, viewed from the eye-point of her own particular build,coloring and temperament, was exactly what she needed to strengthen mightily her very limited personalwardrobe. It was not such an expensive coat, worth possibly a hundred dollars--but fashioned in such anindividual way as to cause her to imagine that, once invested with it, her own physical charm would registermore than it ever had. 　　Moved by this thought, she paused and exclaimed: "Oh, isn't that just the classiest, darlingest little coat you eversaw! Oh, do look at those sleeves, Doris." She clutched her companion violently by the arm. "Lookit the collar. 　　And the lining! And those pockets! Oh, dear!" She fairly vibrated with the intensity of her approval and delight. 　　"Oh, isn't that just too sweet for words? And the very kind of coat I've been thinking of since I don't know when. 　　Oh, you pity sing!" she exclaimed, affectedly, thinking all at once as much of her own pose before the windowand its effect on the passer-by as of the coat before her. "Oh, if I could only have 'oo."She clapped her hands admiringly, while Isadore Rubenstein, the elderly son of the proprietor, who was standingsomewhat out of the range of her gaze at the moment, noted the gesture and her enthusiasm and decidedforthwith that the coat must be worth at least twenty-five or fifty dollars more to her, anyhow, in case sheinquired for it. The firm had been offering it at one hundred. "Oh, ha!" he grunted. But being of a sensual andsomewhat romantic turn, he also speculated to himself rather definitely as to the probable trading value,affectionally speaking, of such a coat. What, say, would the poverty and vanity of such a pretty girl as this causeher to yield for such a coat? 　　In the meantime, however, Hortense, having gloated as long as her noontime hour would permit, had gone away,still dreaming and satiating her flaming vanity by thinking of how devastating she would look in such a coat. Butshe had not stopped to ask the price. Hence, the next day, feeling that she must look at it once more, she returned,only this time alone, and yet with no idea of being able to purchase it herself. On the contrary, she was onlyvaguely revolving the problem of how, assuming that the coat was sufficiently low in price, she could get it. Atthe moment she could think of no one. But seeing the coat once more, and also seeing Mr. Rubenstein, Jr., insideeyeing her in a most propitiatory and genial manner, she finally ventured in. 　　"You like the coat, eh?" was Rubenstein's ingratiating comment as she opened the door. "Well, that shows youhave good taste, I'll say. That's one of the nobbiest little coats we've ever had to show in this store yet. A realbeauty, that. And how it would look on such a beautiful girl as you!" He took it out of the window and held it up. 　　"I seen you when you was looking at it yesterday." A gleam of greedy admiration was in his eye. 　　And noting this, and feeling that a remote and yet not wholly unfriendly air would win her more considerationand courtesy than a more intimate one, Hortense merely said, "Yes?""Yes, indeed. And I said right away, there's a girl that knows a really swell coat when she sees it."The flattering unction soothed, in spite of herself. 　　"Look at that! Look at that!" went on Mr. Rubinstein, turning the coat about and holding it before her. "Where in Kansas City will you find anything to equal that today? Look at this silk lining here--genuine Mallinson silk--andthese slant pockets. And the buttons. You think those things don't make a different-looking coat? There ain'tanother one like it in Kansas City today--not one. And there won't be. We designed it ourselves and we neverrepeat our models. We protect our customers. But come back here." (He led the way to a triple mirror at theback.) "It takes the right person to wear a coat like this--to get the best effect out of it. Let me try it on you."And by the artificial light Hortense was now privileged to see how really fetching she did look in it. She cockedher head and twisted and turned and buried one small ear in the fur, while Mr. Rubenstein stood by, eyeing herwith not a little admiration and almost rubbing his hands. 　　"There now," he continued. "Look at that. What do you say to that, eh? Didn't I tell you it was the very thing foryou? A find for you. A pick-up. You'll never get another coat like that in this city. If you do, I'll make you apresent of this one." He came very near, extending his plump hands, palms up. 　　"Well, I must say it does look smart on me," commented Hortense, her vainglorious soul yearning for it. "I canwear anything like this, though." She twisted and turned the more, forgetting him entirely and the effect herinterest would have on his cost price. Then she added: "How much is it?""Well, it's really a two-hundred-dollar coat," began Mr. Rubenstein artfully. Then noting a shadow ofrelinquishment pass swiftly over Hortense's face, he added quickly: "That sounds like a lot of money, but ofcourse we don't ask so much for it down here. One hundred and fifty is our price. But if that coat was at Jarek's,that's what you'd pay for it and more. We haven't got the location here and we don't have to pay the high rents. 　　But it's worth every cent of two hundred.""Why, I think that's a terrible price to ask for it, just awful," exclaimed Hortense sadly, beginning to remove thecoat. She was feeling as though life were depriving her of nearly all that was worth while. "Why, at Biggs andBeck's they have lots of three- quarter mink and beaver coats for that much, and classy styles, too.""Maybe, maybe. But not that coat," insisted Mr. Rubenstein stubbornly. "Just look at it again. Look at the collar. 　　You mean to say you can find a coat like that up there? If you can, I'll buy the coat for you and sell it to youagain for a hundred dollars. Actually, this is a special coat. It's copied from one of the smartest coats that was inNew York last summer before the season opened. It has class. You won't find no coat like this coat.""Oh, well, just the same, a hundred and fifty dollars is more than I can pay," commented Hortense dolefully, atthe same time slipping on her old broadcloth jacket with the fur collar and cuffs, and edging toward the door. 　　"Wait! You like the coat?" wisely observed Mr. Rubenstein, after deciding that even a hundred dollars was toomuch for her purse, unless it could be supplemented by some man's. "It's really a two-hundred-dollar coat. I'mtelling you that straight. Our regular price is one hundred and fifty. But if you could bring me a hundred andtwenty-five dollars, since you want it so much, well, I'll let you have it for that. And that's like finding it. Astunning-looking girl like you oughtn't to have no trouble in finding a dozen fellows who would be glad to buythat coat and give it to you. I know I would, if I thought you would be nice to me."He beamed ingratiatingly up at her, and Hortense, sensing the nature of the overture and resenting it--from him- drew back slightly. At the same time she was not wholly displeased by the compliment involved. But she was notcoarse enough, as yet, to feel that just any one should be allowed to give her anything. Indeed not. It must besome one she liked, or at least some one that was enslaved by her. 　　And yet, even as Mr. Rubenstein spoke, and for some time afterwards, her mind began running upon possibleindividuals-- favorites--who, by the necromancy of her charm for them, might be induced to procure this coat forher. Charlie Wilkens for instance--he of the Orphia cigar store--who was most certainly devoted to her after hisfashion, but a fashion, however, which did not suggest that he might do much for her without getting a good dealin return. 　　And then there was Robert Kain, another youth--very tall, very cheerful and very ambitious in regard to her, whowas connected with one of the local electric company's branch offices, but his position was not sufficientlylucrative--a mere entry clerk. Also he was too saving--always talking about his future. 　　And again, there was Bert Gettler, the youth who had escorted her to the dance the night Clyde first met her, butwho was little more than a giddy-headed dancing soul, one not to be relied upon in a crisis like this. He was onlya shoe salesman, probably twenty dollars a week, and most careful with his pennies. 　　But there was Clyde Griffiths, the person who seemed to have real money and to be willing to spend it on herfreely. So ran her thoughts swiftly at the time. But could she now, she asked herself, offhand, inveigle him intomaking such an expensive present as this? She had not favored him so very much--had for the most part treatedhim indifferently. Hence she was not sure, by any means. Nevertheless as she stood there, debating the cost andthe beauty of the coat, the thought of Clyde kept running through her mind. And all the while Mr. Rubensteinstood looking at her, vaguely sensing, after his fashion, the nature of the problem that was confronting her. 　　"Well, little girl," he finally observed, "I see you'd like to have this coat, all right, and I'd like to have you have it,too. And now I'll tell you what I'll do, and better than that I can't do, and wouldn't for nobody else--not a personin this city. Bring me a hundred and fifteen dollars any time within the next few days-- Monday or Wednesday orFriday, if the coat is still here, and you can have it. I'll do even better. I'll save it for you. How's that? Until nextWednesday or Friday. More'n that no one would do for you, now, would they?"He smirked and shrugged his shoulders and acted as though he were indeed doing her a great favor. AndHortense, going away, felt that if only--only she could take that coat at one hundred and fifteen dollars, shewould be capturing a marvelous bargain. Also that she would be the smartest-dressed girl in Kansas City beyondthe shadow of a doubt. If only she could in some way get a hundred and fifteen dollars before next Wednesday,or Friday.        这一件事的前因后果，使克莱德特别对两性问题比过去思考得更多，而且决不按照正统观念。他谴责姐姐的情人如此无情地遗弃了她，可是他也不认为姐姐自己就没有过错。当时是她同他一块出走的。现在他从她那里了解到，她同他出走前一年，此人在堪萨斯城待过一星期，就是在那时跟她相识。转年，此人又回到这里，待了两个星期，可这一回，是她自己去找他的……至少克莱德心里是这样怀疑的。因为他自己热衷于霍丹斯。布里格斯，并且心中又在打她的主意，他当然不会说两性关系本身有什么过错。 现在依他看，麻烦倒不是在这件事本身，而是在于他们对这件事的种种后果事先没有想到，或则一无所知。要是爱思达对她自己的意中人，以及对自己同他发生这样一种关系后的后果，事先了解得更多些，那她就不至于陷入目前的惨境了。当然罗，象霍丹斯。布里格斯。格里达。路易斯这一类女人，怎么也不会让自己象爱思达那样陷入这样的绝境。说不定她们也会那样吗? 决不会的，她们太精明呀。他心中把她同她们相比，至少现在她是在吃苦。依他看，本来她应该处理得更明智些。因此，他对她的态度就开始逐渐变得严厉起来，尽管他对姐姐也并不见得漠不关心。 可是，目前只有一件事正使他激动。苦恼，乃至于发生变化，那就是他已经被霍丹斯。布里格斯弄得神魂颠倒了……除这以外，再也没有别的事能使年龄。气质与他相仿的年轻人更加心乱如麻了。他跟她接触了不多几次，就觉得: 说实在的，她是过去他梦寐以求的那类女性的完美化身。她是那么灵活。自负。 迷人，而且确实漂亮。他觉得，她眼里好似迸闪出火花星子。她让自己两片朱唇不停翕动，同时两眼却无动于衷地凝视前方，简直令人心荡神移，仿佛她压根儿不想他似的，可是一下子却激起了他的情焰与狂热，说真的，有时候使他感到浑身无力，头昏目眩，血管里好象有一股股烈火流过，无情地灼烧着他，而这只能称之为意识之中的欲望……本是一种痛苦而又无可奈何的事情，因为他同霍丹斯之间的关系，除了拥抱。接吻以外，不能越雷池一步。同时，他对她在某种程度上说还有点儿拘谨与顾虑;而她呢，实际上非常厌恶她的这些年轻的崇拜者，尽管她总是设法在他们身上激起以上这种心态。她真正疼爱。而且时刻留心寻摸的，正是那样一种年轻小伙子，那就是说，他能够把她所有虚情假意和优越感一扫而空，从而迫使她……哪怕有违她的意志……就范。 事实上，霍丹斯心中始终在摇摆不定: 究竟喜欢他呢，还是不喜欢他。因此，克莱德总是对自己半信半疑;他这种心态，特别使她沾沾自喜，但她又决不让他对她完全死了心以至于最终离弃了她。每当她跟他一块去参加晚会，或是赴宴，或是看戏时，他总是始终表现得特别机智圆通……从不过分武断……而她却突然变得那么驯顺。那么诱人，连最最求全责备的恋人都会感到高兴。这样往往持续到黄昏行将逝去，那时，她在自己家，或是她在那里过夜的别的女孩子家，大门口。房门口，突然转过身来，毫无理由地或则根本不加解释，仅仅跟他握握手，或是漫不经心地拥抱一下，或则接吻一下，就把他给打发走了。碰到这种时候，克莱德还是傻呵呵，妄想迫使她屈服，从她那里攫取到他如饥似渴的抚爱，那末，她就会象一头恶狠狠的猫，怒咻咻地一转过身来不睬他，或是让自己从他怀里挣脱出来，一时间仿佛产生一种强烈的敌意，其原因几乎连她自己都说不上来。看来她主要的心理因素，就是她不愿事事受他驱使支配。而他呢，一来是已被她弄得神魂颠倒，又加上过分害怕失掉了她，所以表现软弱无力，往往怀着阴郁。沮丧的心情，不得不乖乖地走了。 不过，她对他的吸引力毕竟太强烈了，离开她时间久了，他就受不了，所以又情不自禁赶到最容易同她相遇的地方去。这些天来，尽管他同爱思达晤面后已产生相当紧张的后果，事实上，他对霍丹斯依然浸沉在热切。甜蜜而又富于性感的梦幻之中。只要她能真心疼爱他该有多好。入夜，他在家躺卧床上，心里却在想着她……想着她的脸……她的嘴和眼睛的表情，她身段的曲线，她走路时或跳舞时的姿态……她的身影有如映在银幕上，在他眼前一一闪过。他梦见她美滋滋地在他身旁，紧偎着他……她那可爱的身子全都属于他的……然后，在最后关键时刻，好象她就要整个儿委身于他了，蓦然间他一惊醒，发现她早已倏忽不见了……只不过是一场幻梦罢了。 可是与她有关的一些客观情况，好象预示他有可能成功。先说她如同他一样，也是穷人家出身……她父亲是修机器的师傅，还有她的母亲，至今一家人也只能勉强糊口度日。她自幼起就要啥没啥，但凭自己的小聪明，弄到一些花里胡哨的小饰物和蹩脚衣服。她的社会地位是那么低下，至今充其量只能同肉铺子。面包房小伙计这一类人……也就是说，在她家街坊附近常见的顽童，以及净找一些零活干的那一类男孩子来往。不过即使那时，她早已懂得她可以而且应该利用自己的外貌和魅力谋利……事实上，她确实也这么做了。这些小伙子中，就有不少人为了弄钱供她吃喝玩乐，甚至偷盗行窃也都干。 当她年龄稍长，可以工作了，她才同她现在喜欢的那一伙男孩子或成年人有来往。那时她恍然大悟，原来自己不必过分迁就人家，只要小心行事，就能得到比她过去更好的衣着服饰。只不过她实在太淫荡，酷爱寻欢作乐，所以她不大愿意把自己的优势与寻欢作乐截然分开。恰好相反，她一面故意喜欢那些她想加以利用的人，而另一方面又不愿向那些她不喜欢的人卖弄风情，这样，她不时感到苦恼。 以克莱德为例，她并不太喜欢他，可她又禁不住要想利用他。他乐意给她买一些看来她喜爱的小东西……比方说一个拎包。一条披巾。一只钱包。一双手套……只要她提出的要求合情合理，或者接受下来自己并不觉得背了过多的人情债就得了。不过，凭她那聪明乖觉的劲儿，她一开始就明白: 除非她能百依百顺他……在某一个时候，给予他她知道他正如饥似渴地盼着的那种最后酬报……那她就根本不能永远拢住他。 一想到这里，最让她动心的，是: 看来克莱德很乐意为她破钞;也许她能从他那里弄到一些更值钱的东西……比方说，一件价格昂贵的漂亮衣服，或是一顶帽子，乃至于市面上常见陈列也有人穿戴的裘皮大衣;至于她常在各商号橱窗里见了眼红的金耳环和手表，那就更求之不得了。 克莱德发现姐姐爱思达以后不久，有一天，霍丹斯正漫步在第十五街交岔口附近的巴尔的摩街上……那儿是本城商业区最豪华商店集中之地……当时正值正午时分……同她在一起的，有她店里的女同事多丽丝。特兰因。霍丹斯在本市一家规模较小。并非第一流的皮货行橱窗里，看见一件海獭皮外套，依她看，正适合自己的体态。肤色和气质，也是她认为需要花大力地充实自己那个空空如也的衣橱。这件外套并不太贵，也许一百块美元左右……不过款式挺别致，使她心中不由得这样设想: 她一旦穿上了它，就更能勾勒出自己体态的那种迷人的魅力。 她一想到这里就异常激动，竟驻步不前，大声嚷了起来: "啊，这么帅的精美短外套可从来没见过! 哦，瞧这袖子，多丽丝，"她猛地一把抓住了同伴的胳膊。 "瞧这领子，还有外套衬里! 还有那些口袋! 哦，我的老天哪! "她赞不绝口地说，简直欣喜若狂，浑身上下都抖索了。"哦，它太漂亮了，真不知道该怎么说呢。正是我多少天来一心向往的外套啊。哦，你是我心中的小宝贝! "她媚态十足地嚷了起来，心里一个劲儿捉摸着眼前这件短毛皮外套，以及她站在橱窗跟前的神态和这副神态给过往行人留下的印象。"啊，要是我也能有这么一件多好! "她竟在狂喜之中鼓起掌来，这时，商店老板的大儿子伊萨多。鲁宾斯坦正伫立在她目光见不到的地方，已注意到她的姿态和狂喜劲儿。他马上决定，只要她来打听价钱的话，那末，这件短毛皮外套至少要比原价多出二十五块。乃至于五十块美元。而店里原价是一百块美元。"就这样得了! "他咕哝着说。不过，此人是带有一点儿罗曼蒂克的好色之徒，心里还在琢磨着，从爱情视角来说，这么一件外套，真不知道该有多大交换价值。比方说，象这么一个漂亮女郎，但是穷，偏偏又爱虚荣，为了这么一件外套，总会使她不得不俯首听命吧? 霍丹斯在整个午休时间里大饱眼福后，终于走了，可心里依然在梦想。她还在暗中思忖，以满足她那炽烈的虚荣心: 她要是穿上这件外套，一定会使人倾倒。不过，她可没有去店里打听价钱。因此，转天她觉得非要再看一次不可，于是，她就又去了，这回是独个儿去的，心里倒也不认为自个儿就买得起。相反，她只是模模糊糊地在算计着，假定说这件外套价钱相当低，那她又该怎样把它弄到手。当时，她心里并没有在打哪一个人的主意。不过，当她又一次看见了那件外套，也看见正在店堂里和颜悦色地端详她的小鲁宾斯坦先生，她终于闯了进去。 "您喜欢这件外套，嗯? "她推门进去时，鲁宾斯坦就这样献殷勤地说。 "哦，我说，这就足见您有眼力呗。这是只有本店才能陈列出来的最最高贵的短毛皮外套之一。它可真美啊。象您这样的漂亮女郎，一穿上它，这才好看! "他从橱窗里把外套取出来，高高地举了起来。"昨天您一个劲儿看它的时候，我就看见您啦，"他眼里忽闪着馋涎欲滴的光芒。 霍丹斯觉察到这一点，心里想，自己不如摆出一副比较冷淡，但又不是完全不友好的姿态，说不定比一味亲热反而使她能得到更大尊敬和奉承。于是，她只说了一声: "是吗? ""是啊，那还用说嘛。那时我马上就对自己说，这位小姐真能识货，一见它就知道，真有眼力呀。"听了这些奉承话，她心里不由得感到美滋滋的。 "您看! 您看! "鲁宾斯坦先生接下去说，一面把外套来回转悠着，还端到她面前晃动。"今儿个您走遍堪萨斯城，哪儿还找得到同它相比的外套? 您看这绸衬里……地地道道的马林森绸……还有这些斜衣兜。还有这些钮扣。您说，所有这些玩意儿合在一块，不就成了一件与众不同的外套吗? 今儿个在全堪萨斯城，压根儿找不到象它那样的外套了……一件也找不到。包管不会有的。这是我们店自个儿设计的，而且我们的款式，也是从来不重复雷同的。我们店一向维护顾客的权益。劳您大驾，上这边来。"(他把她领到店堂间后边三联镜跟前)"象这么一件外套，还只好让模样儿最合适的人穿……那时穿起来的效果，也就最好了。让我给您试一试吧。"霍丹斯在精心设计的耀眼灯光之下，看到自己身穿这件外套确实格外迷人。 她昂起头来，身子一扭，转了一圈，一只小耳朵埋在裘皮外套里;而鲁宾斯坦先生则伫立在一旁，无限爱慕地凝视着她，几乎不断在搓手。 "敢情好，"他接下去说。"您看看。这会儿您说说，怎么样，嗯? 我不是早说过这仿佛特地为您精心缝制的吗? 可以说是您的一大发现。真是难得碰上的。您在本城再也找不着第二件啦。您要是找得着，我把这一件奉送给您就得了，"他走过来贴近她身旁，他那两只胖乎乎的手一齐伸出来，掌心一概向上。 "哦，穿在我身上，我不能不承认确实漂亮，"霍丹斯说，她的那颗爱虚荣的心，渴望这件外套，简直难受极了。"不过，象这样的裘皮服装，反正穿哪一件我都合适。"她在试衣镜前一次又一次地来回扭腰转圈，压根儿把他给忘了，自然也忘了自己这样热衷此物，同他讨价还价时会不会有什么影响。随后，她又找补着说: "那要多少钱呢? ""哦，这可是货真价实，两百块美元一件的外套，"鲁宾斯坦先生真够精明的，一开头是这么说的。稍后，他觉察到霍丹斯脸上忽然掠过一阵心里只好放弃不买的阴影，就连忙说下去: "听起来价钱好象挺大的，不过，本店当然不会卖得这么贵呗。我们的售价是……一百五十块美元。不过话又说回来，这件外套要是在贾雷克那儿，那您就得出那么多钱，说不定还要更多呢。本店不属于那个市口，所以也用不着付高额房租。可是这件外套，完全绝对是值两百块美元的。 ""哦，我说你们要价太大了，简直是吓人，"霍丹斯脸色不快地大声嚷嚷说，开始把外套脱下来。她感到好象生活中几乎所有一切最珍贵的东西都被剥夺殆尽。"嘿，在比格斯和贝克那儿，按照这个价钱就可以随便拣了，不管是四分之三的貂皮外套，还是海獭皮外套，而且款式也是最时髦的。""这有可能，这有可能。不过，决不是这样的外套，"鲁宾斯坦先生一口咬定重复说。"请您再看一眼。看看这衣领。您刚才是说那儿能找到这样的外套吗? 您要是能找到，我自己先把那件上衣替您买下来，再转手以一百块美元卖给您就得了。老实说，我们这件外套，完全是特制的。是赶当令时节到来以前，就在夏天，专门仿照纽约一家店里最漂亮的外套精心制作的。完全是第一流。包您再也找不到这样好的外套。""哦，不管你怎么说，反正一百五十块美元我可买不起，"霍丹斯郁郁不乐地说，一面披上她那件皮领子。皮袖口的绒面呢旧短大衣，侧身朝店门口挤了出去。 "等一会儿! 您喜欢这件外套? "鲁宾斯坦先生乖觉地说。他心中有数，即使是一百块美元，谅她也买不起，除非有哪一个男人给她的钱袋装得满满的。"这件外套的确值两百块美元。我就跟您实话实说吧。本店的定价，就是一百五十块美元。不过，既然您已是这么喜欢它，您要是能出一百二十五块美元，我就卖给您得了。这反正就象半送半卖呢。象您这样的一位女郎，当然罗，不难找到十来个论打的年轻小伙子，他们都乐意掏钱买下来，送给您罗。我知道，您要是对我好，那我自个儿也会掏钱买下来，送给您的。"他殷勤地对她露出满脸笑容。霍丹斯一觉察到……从他嘴里说出来的……这句话的意思，就很反感。她稍微往后挪了一步。与此同时，她对其中恭维她的话，倒也不是完全不高兴。不过，她毕竟还没有那样鄙俗透顶，乃至于不拘是谁，都可以送东西给她啊。的确，还没有达到这样的程度，如果说有的话，也必须是她喜欢的人，或者至少是她能随便驱使的人。 不过，在鲁宾斯坦先生正在说这话的时候以及说过这话以后，她心里已开始琢磨她所喜欢的那些年轻小伙子，竭力断定他们里头有谁最可能在她迷人的魅力的诱惑下给她买下这件外套。比如说，奥菲亚烟摊的查理。威尔肯斯，他当然自以为对她极端忠诚，但是如果没有很大的还报，谅他也未必会买给她这么珍贵的礼物。 还有另一个年轻人罗伯特。凯恩……个儿高高的，总是乐乐呵呵，对她也很关怀备至，在本地电力公司一个分支机构工作，不过，他仅仅是个记记帐的小职员，进项也不多。而且他又太节俭了……动不动就讲他将来要如何如何。 此外，还有那个伯特。格特勒，也就是克莱德初次同她见面的那天晚上，陪她去跳舞的那个年轻人。不过，此人充其量只是个浮荡子弟，一心只知道跳舞，在这样关键时刻是断断乎不可信赖的。他仅仅是一家皮鞋店里的推销员，每周大约挣二十块美元，连一个铜子儿都要计较的。 可是毕竟还有克莱德。格里菲思，此人好象确实有钱，而且乐意为她花钱，说得上爽气大方了。这时，她的思路就是这样飞也似地运转着。可她又抚心自问，她到底能不能一下子诱使他买下这么一份贵重的礼物呢? 她对他并不是太好……常常对他表示冷淡。因此，她对他是完全没有把握的。尽管如此，她伫立在商店那里，琢磨着那件外套一来要多少钱，二来又有多美，不知怎的她心中老是在想克莱德。鲁宾斯坦一直站在一边瞅着她，凭他的经验，已模模糊糊地猜到了她正面临一个什么样的难题。 "哦，小乖乖，"他终于开腔说，"我看得出您很想买这件外套。好极了，我也很想让您能有这么一件外套。现在，我就把我出的一个好点子告诉您。这可仅仅是对您一个人来说的，对本城其他的人我就不干啦。那就是说，在最近几天以内……星期一，或是星期三，或是星期五，不拘在什么时候，您交给我一百十五块美元，只要外套还在这儿，您包管拿走就得了。我甚至于还可以特别照顾。我会专门给您先把它保留一下。您说怎么样? 直到下星期三，或是星期五为止。人家谁都不会对您比这更为照顾的了，可不是吗? "他得意地笑着，耸耸肩膀，瞧他那种德行仿佛他果真给了她很大的恩惠似的。而霍丹斯呢，走出了店门，心里在想，要是……要是她能够以一百十五块美元买下这件外套，那她就算是做成了一笔惊人的买卖了。而且，毫无疑问，堪萨斯城里穿得最最漂亮的女郎也就数她霍丹斯了。只要她能在下星期三，或是下星期五以前，设法弄到一百十五块美元就得了。

Part 1 Chapter 15 As Hortense well knew Clyde was pressing more and more hungrily toward that ultimate condescension on herpart, which, though she would never have admitted it to him, was the privilege of two others. They were nevertogether any more without his insisting upon the real depth of her regard for him. Why was it, if she cared for him the least bit, that she refused to do this, that or the other--would not let him kiss her as much as he wished,would not let him hold her in his arms as much as he would like. She was always keeping dates with otherfellows and breaking them or refusing to make them with him. What was her exact relationship toward theseothers? Did she really care more for them than she did for him? In fact, they were never together anywhere butwhat this problem of union was uppermost--and but thinly veiled. 　　And she liked to think that he was suffering from repressed desire for her all of the time that she tortured him,and that the power to allay his suffering lay wholly in her--a sadistic trait which had for its soil Clyde's ownmasochistic yearning for her. 　　However, in the face of her desire for the coat, his stature and interest for her were beginning to increase. In spiteof the fact that only the morning before she had informed Clyde, with quite a flourish, that she could not possiblysee him until the following Monday--that all her intervening nights were taken--nevertheless, the problem of thecoat looming up before her, she now most eagerly planned to contrive an immediate engagement with himwithout appearing too eager. For by then she had definitely decided to endeavor to persuade him, if possible, tobuy the coat for her. Only of course, she would have to alter her conduct toward him radically. She would haveto be much sweeter--more enticing. Although she did not actually say to herself that now she might even bewilling to yield herself to him, still basically that was what was in her mind. 　　For quite a little while she was unable to think how to proceed. How was she to see him this day, or the next atthe very latest? How should she go about putting before him the need of this gift, or loan, as she finally worded itto herself? She might hint that he could loan her enough to buy the coat and that later she would pay him back bydegrees (yet once in possession of the coat she well knew that that necessity would never confront her). Or, if hedid not have so much money on hand at one time, she could suggest that she might arrange with Mr. Rubensteinfor a series of time payments which could be met by Clyde. In this connection her mind suddenly turned andbegan to consider how she could flatter and cajole Mr. Rubenstein into letting her have the coat on easy terms. 　　She recalled that he had said he would be glad to buy the coat for her if he thought she would be nice to him. 　　Her first scheme in connection with all this was to suggest to Louise Ratterer to invite her brother, Clyde and athird youth by the name of Scull, who was dancing attendance upon Louise, to come to a certain dance hall thatvery evening to which she was already planning to go with the more favored cigar clerk. Only now she intendedto break that engagement and appear alone with Louise and Greta and announce that her proposed partner wasill. That would give her an opportunity to leave early with Clyde and with him walk past the Rubenstein store. 　　But having the temperament of a spider that spins a web for flies, she foresaw that this might involve thepossibility of Louise's explaining to Clyde or Ratterer that it was Hortense who had instigated the party. It mighteven bring up some accidental mention of the coat on the part of Clyde to Louise later, which, as she felt, wouldnever do. She did not care to let her friends know how she provided for herself. In consequence, she decided thatit would not do for her to appeal to Louise nor to Greta in this fashion. 　　And she was actually beginning to worry as to how to bring about this encounter, when Clyde, who chanced tobe in the vicinity on his way home from work, walked into the store where she was working. He was seeking fora date on the following Sunday. And to his intense delight, Hortense greeted him most cordially with a mostengaging smile and a wave of the hand. She was busy at the moment with a customer. She soon finished, however, and drawing near, and keeping one eye on her floor-walker who resented callers, exclaimed: "I was justthinking about you. You wasn't thinking about me, was you? Trade last." Then she added, sotto voce, "Don't actlike you are talking to me. I see our floorwalker over there."Arrested by the unusual sweetness in her voice, to say nothing of the warm smile with which she greeted him,Clyde was enlivened and heartened at once. "Was I thinking of you?" he returned gayly. "Do I ever think of anyone else? Say! Ratterer says I've got you on the brain.""Oh, him," replied Hortense, pouting spitefully and scornfully, for Ratterer, strangely enough, was one whom shedid not interest very much, and this she knew. "He thinks he's so smart," she added. "I know a lotta girls don'tlike him.""Oh, Tom's all right," pleaded Clyde, loyally. "That's just his way of talking. He likes you.""Oh, no, he don't, either," replied Hortense. "But I don't want to talk about him. Whatcha doin' around six o'clockto-night?""Oh, gee!" exclaimed Clyde disappointedly. "You don't mean to say you got to-night free, have you? Well, ain'tthat tough? I thought you were all dated up. I got to work!" He actually sighed, so depressed was he by thethought that she might be willing to spend the evening with him and he not able to avail himself of theopportunity, while Hortense, noting his intense disappointment, was pleased. 　　"Well, I gotta date, but I don't want to keep it," she went on with a contemptuous gathering of the lips. "I don'thave to break it. I would though if you was free." Clyde's heart began to beat rapidly with delight. 　　"Gee, I wish I didn't have to work now," he went on, looking at her. "You're sure you couldn't make it to-morrownight? I'm off then. And I was just coming up here to ask you if you didn't want to go for an automobile ride nextSunday afternoon, maybe. A friend of Hegglund's got a car--a Packard--and Sunday we're all off. And he wantedme to get a bunch to run out to Excelsior Springs. He's a nice fellow" (this because Hortense showed signs of notbeing so very much interested). "You don't know him very well, but he is. But say, I can talk to you about thatlater. How about to-morrow night? I'm off then."Hortense, who, because of the hovering floor-walker, was pretending to show Clyde some handkerchiefs, wasnow thinking how unfortunate that a whole twenty-four hours must intervene before she could bring him to viewthe coat with her--and so have an opportunity to begin her machinations. At the same time she pretended that theproposed meeting for the next night was a very difficult thing to bring about--more difficult than he couldpossibly appreciate. She even pretended to be somewhat uncertain as to whether she wanted to do it. 　　"Just pretend you're examining these handkerchiefs here," she continued, fearing the floor-walker mightinterrupt. "I gotta nother date for then," she continued thoughtfully, "and I don't know whether I can break it ornot. Let me see." She feigned deep thought. "Well, I guess I can," she said finally. "I'll try, anyhow. Just for thisonce. You be here at Fifteenth and Main at 6.15--no, 6.30's the best you can do, ain't it?--and I'll see if I can't getthere. I won't promise, but I'll see and I think I can make it. Is that all right?" She gave him one of her sweetestsmiles and Clyde was quite beside himself with satisfaction. To think that she would break a date for him, at last. 　　Her eyes were warm with favor and her mouth wreathed with a smile. 　　"Surest thing you know," he exclaimed, voicing the slang of the hotel boys. "You bet I'll be there. Will you dome a favor?""What is it?" she asked cautiously. 　　"Wear that little black hat with the red ribbon under your chin, will you? You look so cute in that.""Oh, you," she laughed. It was so easy to kid Clyde. "Yes, I'll wear it," she added. "But you gotta go now. Herecomes that old fish. I know he's going to kick. But I don't care. Six-thirty, eh? So long." She turned to give herattention to a new customer, an old lady who had been patiently waiting to inquire if she could tell her where themuslins were sold. And Clyde, tingling with pleasure because of this unexpected delight vouchsafed him, madehis way most elatedly to the nearest exit. 　　He was not made unduly curious because of this sudden favor, and the next evening, promptly at six-thirty, andin the glow of the overhanging arc-lights showering their glistening radiance like rain, she appeared. As henoted, at once, she had worn the hat he liked. Also she was enticingly ebullient and friendly, more so than at anytime he had known her. Before he had time to say that she looked pretty, or how pleased he was because shewore that hat, she began: 　　"Some favorite you're gettin' to be, I'LL SAY, when I'LL break an engagement and then wear an old hat I don'tlike just to please you. How do I get that way is what I'd like to know."He beamed as though he had won a great victory. Could it be that at last he might be becoming a favorite withher? 　　"If you only knew how cute you look in that hat, Hortense, you wouldn't knock it," he urged admiringly. "Youdon't know how sweet you do look.""Oh, ho. In this old thing?" she scoffed. "You certainly are easily pleased, I'll say.""An' your eyes are just like soft, black velvet," he persisted eagerly. "They're wonderful." He was thinking of analcove in the Green-Davidson hung with black velvet. 　　"Gee, you certainly have got 'em to-night," she laughed, teasingly. "I'll have to do something about you." Then,before he could make any reply to this, she went off into an entirely fictional account of how, having had aprevious engagement with a certain alleged young society man--Tom Keary by name--who was dogging hersteps these days in order to get her to dine and dance, she had only this evening decided to "ditch" him,preferring Clyde, of course, for this occasion, anyhow. And she had called Keary up and told him that she couldnot see him to-night--called it all off, as it were. But just the same, on coming out of the employee's entrance,who should she see there waiting for her but this same Tom Keary, dressed to perfection in a bright gray raglanand spats, and with his closed sedan, too. And he would have taken her to the Green-Davidson, if she hadwanted to go. He was a real sport. But she didn't. Not to-night, anyhow. Yet, if she had not contrived to avoid him, he would have delayed her. But she espied him first and ran the other way. 　　"And you should have just seen my little feet twinkle up Sargent and around the corner into Bailey Place," wasthe way she narcissistically painted her flight. And so infatuated was Clyde by this picture of herself and thewonderful Keary that he accepted all of her petty fabrications as truth. 　　And then, as they were walking in the direction of Gaspie's, a restaurant in Wyandotte near Tenth which quitelately he had learned was much better than Frissell's, Hortense took occasion to pause and look in a number ofwindows, saying as she did so that she certainly did wish that she could find a little coat that was becoming toher--that the one she had on was getting worn and that she must have another soon--a predicament which causedClyde to wonder at the time whether she was suggesting to him that he get her one. Also whether it might notadvance his cause with her if he were to buy her a little jacket, since she needed it. 　　But Rubenstein's coming into view on this same side of the street, its display window properly illuminated andthe coat in full view, Hortense paused as she had planned. 　　"Oh, do look at that darling little coat there," she began, ecstatically, as though freshly arrested by the beauty ofit, her whole manner suggesting a first and unspoiled impression. "Oh, isn't that the dearest, sweetest, cutest littlething you ever did see?" she went on, her histrionic powers growing with her desire for it. "Oh, just look at thecollar, and those sleeves and those pockets. Aren't they the snappiest things you ever saw? Couldn't I just warmmy little hands in those?" She glanced at Clyde out of the tail of her eye to see if he was being properlyimpressed. 　　And he, aroused by her intense interest, surveyed the coat with not a little curiosity. Unquestionably it was apretty coat--very. But, gee, what would a coat like that cost, anyhow? Could it be that she was trying to interesthim in the merits of a coat like that in order that he might get it for her? Why, it must be a two-hundred-dollarcoat at least. He had no idea as to the value of such things, anyhow. He certainly couldn't afford a coat like that. 　　And especially at this time when his mother was taking a good portion of his extra cash for Esta. And yetsomething in her manner seemed to bring it to him that that was exactly what she was thinking. It chilled andalmost numbed him at first. 　　And yet, as he now told himself sadly, if Hortense wanted it, she could most certainly find some one who wouldget it for her--that young Tom Keary, for instance, whom she had just been describing. And, worse luck, she wasjust that kind of a girl. And if he could not get it for her, some one else could and she would despise him for notbeing able to do such things for her. 　　To his intense dismay and dissatisfaction she exclaimed: 　　"Oh, what wouldn't I give for a coat like that!" She had not intended at the moment to put the matter so bluntly,for she wanted to convey the thought that was deepest in her mind to Clyde tactfully. 　　And Clyde, inexperienced as he was, and not subtle by any means, was nevertheless quite able to gather themeaning of that. It meant--it meant--for the moment he was not quite willing to formulate to himself what it didmean. And now--now--if only he had the price of that coat. He could feel that she was thinking of some one certain way to get the coat. And yet how was he to manage it? How? If he could only arrange to get this coat forher--if he only could promise her that he would get it for her by a certain date, say, if it didn't cost too much, thenwhat? Did he have the courage to suggest to her to-night, or to-morrow, say, after he had learned the price of thecoat, that if she would--why then--why then, well, he would get her the coat or anything else she really wanted. 　　Only he must be sure that she was not really fooling him as she was always doing in smaller ways. He wouldn'tstand for getting her the coat and then get nothing in return--never! 　　As he thought of it, he actually thrilled and trembled beside her. And she, standing there and looking at the coat,was thinking that unless he had sense enough now to get her this thing and to get what she meant--how sheintended to pay for it--well then, this was the last. He need not think she was going to fool around with any onewho couldn't or wouldn't do that much for her. Never. 　　They resumed their walk toward Gaspie's. And throughout the dinner, she talked of little else--how attractive thecoat was, how wonderful it would look on her. 　　"Believe me," she said at one point, defiantly, feeling that Clyde was perhaps uncertain at the moment about hisability to buy it for her, "I'm going to find some way to get that coat. I think, maybe, that Rubenstein store wouldlet me have it on time if I were to go in there and see him about it, make a big enough payment down. Anothergirl out of our store got a coat that way once," she lied promptly, hoping thus to induce Clyde to assist her withit. But Clyde, disturbed by the fear of some extraordinary cost in connection with it, hesitated to say just what hewould do. He could not even guess the price of such a thing--it might cost two or three hundred even--and hefeared to obligate himself to do something which later he might not be able to do. 　　"You don't know what they might want for that, do you?" he asked, nervously, at the same time thinking if hemade any cash gift to her at this time without some guarantee on her part, what right would he have to expectanything more in return than he had ever received? He knew how she cajoled him into getting things for her andthen would not even let him kiss her. He flushed and churned a little internally with resentment at the thought ofhow she seemed to feel that she could play fast and loose with him. And yet, as he now recalled, she had just saidshe would do anything for any one who would get that coat for her--or nearly that. 　　"No-o," she hesitated at first, for the moment troubled as to whether to give the exact price or something higher. 　　For if she asked for time, Mr. Rubenstein might want more. And yet if she said much more, Clyde might notwant to help her. "But I know it wouldn't be more than a hundred and twenty-five. I wouldn't pay more than thatfor it."Clyde heaved a sigh of relief. After all, it wasn't two or three hundred. He began to think now that if she couldarrange to make any reasonable down payment--say, fifty or sixty dollars--he might manage to bring it togetherwithin the next two or three weeks anyhow. But if the whole hundred and twenty-five were demanded at once,Hortense would have to wait, and besides he would have to know whether he was to be rewarded or not-definitely. 　　"That's a good idea, Hortense," he exclaimed without, however, indicating in any way why it appealed to him somuch. "Why don't you do that? Why don't you find out first what they want for it, and how much they wantdown? Maybe I could help you with it.""Oh, won't that be just too wonderful!" Hortense clapped her hands. "Oh, will you? Oh, won't that be just dandy? 　　Now I just know I can get that coat. I just know they'll let me have it, if I talk to them right."She was, as Clyde saw and feared, quite forgetting the fact that he was the one who was making the coatpossible, and now it would be just as he thought. The fact that he was paying for it would be taken for granted. 　　But a moment later, observing his glum face, she added: "Oh, aren't you the sweetest, dearest thing, to help me inthis way. You just bet I won't forget this either. You just wait and see. You won't be sorry. Now you just wait."Her eyes fairly snapped with gayety and even generosity toward him. 　　He might be easy and young, but he wasn't mean, and she would reward him, too, she now decided. Just as soonas she got the coat, which must be in a week or two at the latest, she was going to be very nice to him--dosomething for him. And to emphasize her own thoughts and convey to him what she really meant, she allowedher eyes to grow soft and swimming and to dwell on him promisingly--a bit of romantic acting which causedhim to become weak and nervous. The gusto of her favor frightened him even a little, for it suggested, as hefancied, a disturbing vitality which he might not be able to match. He felt a little weak before her now--a littlecowardly--in the face of what he assumed her real affection might mean. 　　Nevertheless, he now announced that if the coat did not cost more than one hundred and twenty-five dollars, thatsum to be broken into one payment of twenty-five dollars down and two additional sums of fifty dollars each, hecould manage it. And she on her part replied that she was going the very next day to see about it. Mr. Rubensteinmight be induced to let her have it at once on the payment of twenty-five dollars down; if not that, then at the endof the second week, when nearly all would be paid. 　　And then in real gratitude to Clyde she whispered to him, coming out of the restaurant and purring like a cat, thatshe would never forget this and that he would see--and that she would wear it for him the very first time. If hewere not working they might go somewhere to dinner. Or, if not that, then she would have it surely in time forthe day of the proposed automobile ride which he, or rather Hegglund, had suggested for the following Sunday,but which might be postponed. 　　She suggested that they go to a certain dance hall, and there she clung to him in the dances in a suggestive wayand afterwards hinted of a mood which made Clyde a little quivery and erratic. 　　He finally went home, dreaming of the day, satisfied that he would have no trouble in bringing together the firstpayment, if it were so much as fifty, even. For now, under the spur of this promise, he proposed to borrow asmuch as twenty-five from either Ratterer or Hegglund, and to repay it after the coat was paid for. 　　But, ah, the beautiful Hortense. The charm of her, the enormous, compelling, weakening delight. And to thinkthat at last, and soon, she was to be his. It was, plainly, of such stuff as dreams are made of--the unbelievablebecome real.        霍丹斯心里很明白，克莱德正越来越渴望她最后屈尊俯就，殊不知这是属于另外两个人享受的特殊权利，尽管她永远也不会向他承认这一点。现在每次见面，克莱德总是要求她实实在在地对他表表态。要是她真的有一点儿爱他，那她为什么又拒绝了他这个或那个要求……比方说，不让他痛痛快快地吻她，不让他痛痛快快地搂抱她。她同别人约会，总是守约，可是同克莱德相会，就照例要失约，或者干脆拒绝同他约会。那末，她同别的这些人，究竟是什么关系呢? 她真的喜爱他们胜过喜爱克莱德吗? 事实上，他们每次相遇时常常谈到的，总是他们结合的问题……尽管不免谈得还有点儿含糊不清。 霍丹斯心中暗自高兴地想到: 克莱德由于对她的欲念没法得到宣泄而深感痛苦……她是造成他痛苦的根源，同时又完全掌握了减轻痛苦的权力……这里带有一种施虐淫的特点，而克莱德自我受虐淫式地对她的渴望则是它赖以孳生的土壤。 不过，如今她急欲弄到这件外套，克莱德的重要性，在她看来开始有增无减了。虽说仅仅在前一天早上，她还花言巧语地通知克莱德，说下星期一以前，她大概不能同他见面……因为每天晚上她都有约会……可现在这外套问题已明摆在她面前，她就急急乎想方设法如何安排马上同他会面，可又不能显露出自己太心急的表情来。她早已决定，到时候如果有可能的话，好歹也要说服他给她买这件外套。当然罗，她就得彻底改变自己对待他的态度，也就是说要变得更加亲昵……更加迷人。虽然她真的还没有暗自思忖过甚至现在就准备顺从他的要求，不过，在她心里萦绕不去的，正是这么一种想法。 开头她怎么也想不出该怎么办才好。她怎么能在今天，或者至迟明天见到他呢? 她该怎样向他说明她需要这件礼物，或者象她最后暗自思忖的那样说成需要向他借钱呢? 也许她可以向他暗示，他不妨借钱给她把这件外套买下来，以后她会慢慢归还他。(不过，她心中也明白，只要她把外套拿到手里，那她就根本用不着再归还了。)要不然，如果说他手头一时没有这么多钱，那她不妨说，她可以跟鲁宾斯坦先生讲好分期付款，再由克莱德按期付清。至此，她忽然转念一想，她应该琢磨一下，怎样用甜言蜜语诱惑鲁宾斯坦先生，让她按优厚条件购得这件外套。她回想起他说过，只要他知道她将会待他好，他也会乐意给她买这件外套的。 关于这一切，她心中首先想到的计划，就是建议路易斯。拉特勒出面，在今天晚上邀请她哥哥。克莱德和另一个经常跟路易斯一起伴舞。名叫斯卡尔的年轻人，都到她原先打算同她更为喜欢的一个烟摊伙计一块去的那家舞厅。现在她只好取消原先定好的约会，独自一人跟路易斯和格里达一块去了，推托说她原先说好的舞伴病了。那就会给她一个机会跟克莱德一块儿提前退场，拉着他去鲁宾斯坦铺子。 不过，霍丹斯毕竟具有蜘蛛网罗飞虫的气质。她预见到，事后路易斯很可能会向克莱德或拉特勒解释，说今晚舞会是霍丹斯出的主意。克莱德甚至还可能向路易斯无意中谈起外套的事，她觉得，这是绝对要不得的。她不愿意让她的朋友们了解她是怎样给自己张罗的。因此，她就决定她不能用这样方式求助于路易斯或是格里达。 当她真的为如何邂逅一事发愁的时候，克莱德刚好下班回家路过这里，顺便走进了她工作的商店，打算约她星期日见面。霍丹斯喜出望外，脸上露出非常迷人的微笑，非常亲昵地向他挥手致意。这时她正忙着接待一位顾客。不过，她一下子就完事了，走到他身旁，一只眼睛乜着店里那个讨厌会客。到处巡视的稽查员，一面大声嚷道: "我心里正惦着你呢。你可没有惦着我，是吧? 交换一下好消息吧。"说完，她又低声说: "别现出你在同我说话的样子。瞧我们稽查员在那边。"这时，克莱德已被她说话时那种异乎寻常的媚态给迷住了，至于她同他打招呼时的热情微笑，就更不用提了。于是，他一下子心花怒放了。"我没有惦着你吗? "他乐呵呵地回答说。"难道说我还惦着别人吗? 你听着! 拉特勒说我心心念念在惦着你哩。""哦，他这个人呀，"霍丹斯说，轻鄙地嘴唇一抿，露出怒咻咻的样子。因为，说来也真怪，她本来对拉特勒此人不怎么感兴趣，这一点她自己心里也很清楚。 "他满以为自己准会令人倾倒，"她找补着说。"我知道很多姑娘都不喜欢他呢。""哦，汤姆是顶呱呱的，"克莱德作为忠实的朋友马上申辩说。"只不过他说话时那副德行呗。他可喜欢你哩。""哦，不，他才不是呢，"霍丹斯回答说。"不过，我可不打算谈他。今儿个晚上六点钟，你有事吗? ""哎哟哟! "克莱德失望地大声说。"你是说你今儿晚上有空，是吗? 哦，真可惜! 我还以为你天天晚上全有约会呢。可我得上班呀! "他真的叹了一口气，伤心地想: 今天也许她愿意同他一起消磨一个夜晚，他却不能利用这一大好机会。可霍丹斯一发现他很失望的样子，心中暗自高兴。 "哦，我虽然有约会，可我不想去了，"她接下去说，轻蔑地努努嘴。"本来我是用不着失约的。不过，你要是有空，我也就不去得了。"克莱德一听，高兴得心儿怦怦直跳。 "哦，我真是巴不得今晚能不去上班呀，"他接下去说，一面望着她。"你明儿晚上有空吗? 明儿晚上我休息。我这是特地赶来问你，星期日下午也许乘汽车一块兜风去，你去不去? 赫格伦的一个朋友有车……是一辆' ''''帕卡德，……而且星期日我们大伙儿都有空。他要我寻摸一拨人，开车到至善泉去。他是个呱呱叫的小伙子。"(他之所以这样说，原是因为霍丹斯仿佛露出不太感兴趣的神色。)"你不大了解他，说真的，是个呱呱叫的小伙子。好吧，这事下次再跟你谈。明儿晚上，怎么样? 我明儿晚上休息。"霍丹斯因为稽查员又踅来这里，就佯装拿出来一些手绢，让克莱德挑选。 她心里暗想，真可惜，还得捱过整整二十四个小时，才能带他一块去看那件外套……那时她方才有机会使她的预谋得逞。同时，她又佯装好似拟议中的明儿晚上约会很为难……比他想象的还要难得多。她甚至装出自己是不是有空，也都说不准的样子。 "你只管假装在挑选手绢，"她接下去说，心里很怕稽查员也许踅过来，把他们的谈话给掐断了。"明儿晚上我已另有约会，"她显出考虑得很周到的样子说。 "可我还不知道能不能取消。让我想一想，"她假装在深思熟虑之后才说。"哦，我想总可以吧，"后来她又说。"反正我就尽力而为。就是这么一次呗。你到第十五街和大街的拐角处，六点一刻……哦，不，你最早还得六点半到，是吗? ……我也还得尽量争取去。事先我可不能说定，不过，我总得尽力而为。我想我是能去的。这你满意了吗? "她向他投去一个非常迷人的微笑，克莱德简直开心得不能自主了。只要想一想: 为了他，她终于把另一个约会取消啦。她眼里露出爱抚的闪光，嘴角边含着……微笑。 "再对也没有啦，"他大声嚷嚷说，把格林－戴维逊大酒店里侍应生的俚语也说漏了嘴。"当然罗，到时我一定去。你能不能答应我的一个要求? ""什么要求? "她小心翼翼地问。 "你来时就头戴这顶小黑帽儿，下巴颏儿结一条红色缎带。好吗? 那样你才显得真俏。""嘿，你真会恭维呀，"她格格笑了起来。要逗弄克莱德可太容易了。"敢情好，我戴就戴吧，"她找补着说。"不过，现在你该走了。瞧那老家伙踅过来了。 我知道，他准会发牢骚的。不过我可不在乎。六点半，嗯? 再见。"她转过身去招呼一位新顾客。那是一个老妇人，她耐心地等了很久，想打听细纱布在哪儿有卖。而克莱德呢，因为突然得到这一意外的赏光，几乎高兴得颤抖起来，就喜孜孜地朝最近的一个出口处走去。 他对这次突然受宠，并不感到特别奇怪。转天傍晚六点半整，在雨点一般光芒四射的。高悬的弧形灯光的照耀下，她翩然而至了。他马上发现，她戴的正是他最喜爱的那顶帽子。而且克莱德从来没有看到她显得那样迷人。活泼。 亲热。他还来不及说她有多美，或是说她戴那顶帽子他有多高兴，她早已抢先说了: "我说，你真的成了我的心肝宝贝儿啦，所以，我才失约食言，我又戴上这顶我不喜欢的破帽儿，只为了使你高兴。我怎么会那样的，连自个儿都不明白。 "他粲然一笑，好象他已取得了一大胜利。难道说他最后真的会成为她的心肝宝贝儿吗? "你要是早知道你戴了那顶帽子多俏，霍丹斯，恐怕你就不会小看它了，"他赞赏地鼓励她说。"你可没想象过，戴了它你的模样儿有多美啊。""哦，是吗? 戴了这顶破玩意儿? "她嘲笑说。"我说，要你心里高兴，当然不难。""还有你的一对眼睛，简直就象软绵绵的黑天鹅绒，"他热乎乎地一个劲儿说。 "真是美极了。"这会儿他正想到格林－戴维逊大酒店挂着黑天鹅绒的一个小凹室。 "哦，今儿晚上你真是够意思，"她格格地笑了起来，想逗弄一下克莱德。"看来我还得为你干点什么。"克莱德还来不及回话，她就开始讲纯属捏造的一段事，说她同某一个据说交际广阔的年轻人，名叫汤姆。基尔里的……原有约会。 这些天来，此人老是一步不离盯住她，请她去吃饭。跳舞。今儿晚上她决定干脆"甩掉"他，当然罗，是因为喜欢克莱德，至少这次是这样。而且，她还打电话给基尔里，对他说今儿晚上不能同他见面了……约会就干脆给取消了。可是，当她走出专供职工上下班的出入口时，她还是看到了有个人在等着她，不用说，就是汤姆。基尔里。此人衣冠楚楚，身穿一件漂亮的灰色拉格伦式大衣和鞋罩，还有他的那辆小轿车。要是她高兴的话，本来他就要带她上格林－戴维逊大酒店去。他真是好一个堂堂正正的男子汉。可是，她并没有去。反正今儿晚上不行。不过再说，她要是没有耍诡计躲过他，他就可能把她缠住不放了。幸好是她先瞥见他的，她就从另一条路跑了。 "说实在的，你真该看看，当时我的一双小腿在萨金特街飞也似的跑，身子一忽闪，拐过弯，溜进了贝利大楼，"她扬扬自得地描述她如何慌张脱逃的情景。 她把她自己和那个了不起的基尔里绘声绘色地说了一通，竟使克莱德迷迷糊糊，对她胡编出来的这一套信以为真了。 随后，他们朝第十街附近，威恩多特街上的加斯比酒家走去。最近克莱德才听说这一家餐馆比弗里塞尔酒家好得多。霍丹斯不时驻步不前，往一些商店橱窗张望，还说她真的巴不得找到一件她穿着合身的外套……现在她穿的一件已经旧了，非得马上另置新的不可……这样一种困境，使克莱德不禁心中纳闷，她是不是示意他给她买一件。他心里还在琢磨，既然她短缺外套，要是他买一件给她，也许还能推动他们俩的关系向前发展。 殊不知鲁宾斯坦时装店已近在咫尺了，陈列橱窗里光亮夺目，把那件裘皮外套照得纤毫毕露。霍丹斯按照预定计划停住了脚步。 "喂，你看那件短外套多可爱，"她开腔说，露出欣喜若狂的样子，仿佛她刚看到它的美就给吸引住了，从她整个神态表明了她第一次鲜灵灵的印象。"哦，这个最可爱。最精美的短外套，不是你从没有见过的吗? "她继续说下去。她心里越是渴望得到它，她那演剧的才能也越是得到发挥。"哦，你瞧那领子。那衣袖，还有那衣兜。这些最最时髦的东西，不都是你从没有见过的吗? 我的一双小手，只要一伸进去，就觉得挺暖和的。"她用眼角斜乜着克莱德，看看他对它有没有产生如同她希望那样深刻的印象。 果然，克莱德被她浓厚的兴趣所激动，怀着好奇心，正在仔细打量着这件短外套。毫无疑问，这是一件漂亮短外套……漂亮得很。不过，嘿，这样一件外套，要卖多少钱呀? 难道说霍丹斯一个劲儿要他注意这件外套，就为了让他买下来给她吗? 不过，买这外套至少得花两百块美元。反正这一类东西的价钱究竟是多少，他也闹不清。这样一件外套，当然罗，他买不起。特别在最近，他外快中相当大的一部分，已被母亲拿去给了爱思达。不过，听她的口气好象让他心里明白，此刻她寄厚望于他的，正是这么一件东西。开头，他的心冷了半截，几乎连话都说不出来了。 他伤心地暗自寻思，要是霍丹斯真心要的话，当然罗，准能找人……比方说，她刚才提到过的年轻人汤姆。基尔里……给她买的，而糟就糟在她正好就是这一号女郎。要是他不买给她，而别人却给她买了，那她就会瞧不起他，无非是因为他没有钱给她买这个东西。 她大声嚷嚷说: "只要得了这样一件外套，我还有啥舍不得给的呢! "让他听了感到非常惊恐和不满。本来她并不打算在此刻这样开门见山地说了出来，因为她原想把她隐藏在心底的想法非常巧妙地说给克莱德听的。 克莱德尽管没有处世经验，人品也说不上精明，不过对她这句话的涵意倒是很能心领神会。这是说……这是说……暂时他还不怎么愿意把这句话的涵意给予正确理解。现在啊……现在啊……只要他能知道那件外套的价格，那多好! 他已觉察到她正在寻摸什么办法，把这件外套弄到手。不过，他有什么办法呢? 怎么办呢? 只要他能够设法给她弄到这件外套……只要他答应她，比方说，过一些日子给她弄到这件外套，只要花费不太多，那时又会怎么样呢? 他有没有这个胆量，就在今儿晚上，或是比方说，在明天，等他得知外套的价格以后，干脆对她说开了，只要她同意……那时……那时，反正不管外套也好，还是她真的想要别的什么东西，他通通都会买给她。只不过他一定要有把握，看准她决不会象前时那样，在一些小事上存心耍弄他。不，他决不愿意给她买了外套，到头来却什么还报都得不到……这可绝对要不得! 他站在她身旁，一想到这里，真的兴奋得浑身颤栗起来了。而她呢，站在那儿，两眼直瞅着外套，心里在想: 除非他放聪明些，给她弄到这件外套，又能领会她真正的意思……她为了这件外套打算怎样付出代价的……否则的话，得了吧，那时同他就算是最后了结啦。他别以为: 连这一点小事都不能，或者是不想给她出力的人，她霍丹斯还会照样同这种人厮混在一起。这可绝对要不得! 他们继续朝加斯比酒家走去。进餐时，她自始至终几乎什么事都不讲，却一个劲儿说……那件外套有多么好看，穿在她身上一定漂亮极了。 "相信我吧，"这时，她有些不服气地说道，因为她已感到克莱德对自己有没有力量给她买外套也许信心还不足，"我一定得寻摸什么办法，把那件外套弄到手。我想，要是我走进店里去，鲁宾斯坦先生讲定分期付款，先付下一笔相当多的钱，那他们店里马上就会给我的。不久前，我们百货商店里有一个女售货员，就是这样把外套买来了，"转眼间她又在撒谎了，希望借此引诱克莱德也助她一臂之力。不过，克莱德生怕这玩意儿价钱太大，犹豫不定，没有说出他究竟打算怎么办。他甚至连这一类东西的价钱也都猜不出来……也许是两百块美元，乃至于高达三百块美元……他生怕现在一口答应下来，往后他也许办不到。 "你不知道这玩意儿要卖多少钱，是不是? "他紧张不安地说，同时心里在想，要是这次他送她一点现钱，她却没有给他一点保证，那他还有什么权利，指望从她那里得到比过去更多的还报呢? 他心里也明白: 过去她是怎样以甜言蜜语引诱他给她买这买那，到头来甚至还不让他吻一吻她。克莱德一想到往日里她好象觉得可以随意玩弄他，就很气忿，脸上唰地涨红，心中十分恼火。不过，此刻他又想起，她刚才说过，不拘是谁，只要给她弄到那件外套，那她什么事都乐意干……好象她说的就是这么个意思。 "不……不知道，"开头她有点儿犹豫不决，一时很为难，不知道说出真正的价钱好呢，还是索性把价钱说得更高些。因为明摆着，如果她要求分期付款，鲁宾斯坦先生也许就会把价格抬得更高了。不过话又说回来，她要是把价钱说得太大，说不定克莱德也就不愿帮她的忙了。"不过，我可知道当然不会超过一百二十五块美元。要不然，我也就不愿意买了。"克莱德舒了一大口气。毕竟还不是高达两三百块美元。他心里就在琢磨着: 要是她能跟店里讲好，先付相当大的一笔……比方说，五十块，或是六十块美元……在以后两三个星期里，好歹他也能设法凑齐归还。不过，要是整整一百二十五块美元必须一次付清，那霍丹斯还有一段时间要等呢;而且，除这以外，他还得先闹清楚: 他是不是能得到实实在在的报答才成。 "那倒是个好主意，霍丹斯，"他大声嚷嚷说，不过没有说明为什么他很赞同这个办法。"为什么你不那样做呢? 为什么你不先问问清楚价钱，先付多少钱? 也许我能帮你一点忙。""哦，那可太好了! "霍丹斯禁不住鼓掌起来。"哦，你果真能帮忙? 哦，这不是太棒了吗? 现在我才知道我就会得到那件外套的。我知道，只要我能同他们店里讲好分期付款，他们一定会给我的。"正如克莱德预料和担心的那样，她早已完全忘掉了这样一个事实: 正是由于他，她才能买那件外套。可是现在这一切，就正如他当初预料到的一模一样。 事实上由他来付钱，这在霍丹斯看来是理所当然的了。 可是过了一会儿，她发觉他脸色沉了下来，就找补着说: "哦，你这样帮我的忙，你是天底下最漂亮。最可爱的人，可不是吗? 你尽管放心，这件事我可怎么也忘不了的。你等着瞧吧。你也用不着后悔的。你只要等着瞧就得了。"她眼里突然向他露出快活。甚至慷慨大方的闪光。 尽管克莱德也许太年轻稚嫩，可他并不是悭吝人，所以，她也要酬谢他，现在她已作出了这样决定。只要她一拿到这件外套，想必这件事在一周以内，最迟也不超过两个星期就能实现，那时她就要对他特别温存……多少让他乐一乐。为了有力说明她的这个想法，让他更好了解她的真心实意，她就凝神注视着他，使他充满了希望，同时，让她眼里甚至迸射出温柔的泪水汪汪的闪光……这么一点儿罗曼蒂克的小动作，竟然使他心神不安，惘然若失。在她面前，他简直受宠若惊，甚至还有一点儿惶悚，因为在他的想象之中，她那目光里暗示着一种令人心慌意乱的旺盛活力，恐怕他也是没法应付的。此刻他在她面前却感到有点儿软弱无力……也有一点儿胆怯……当他想到她那真正的情爱可能意味着什么的时候。 尽管如此，这时他还是说，如果这件外套不超过一百二十五块美元，又可以分期付款，第一次先付二十五块美元，以后各次付五十块美元，那他还是可以设法张罗的。她回答说，她打算明天就去打听一下。也许她会说服鲁宾斯坦先生，只要先付二十五块美元，马上就把外套给她;要不然，就在第二个周末给他，那时节几乎全都付清了。 当她从酒家走出来的时候，她真的对克莱德充满了感激之情，象小猫咪呜呜叫似的向他轻声耳语道，这件事她永远忘不了，他只管等着瞧就得了……她还一定第一次穿着这件外套给他看。那时他要是不上班，也许他们就上什么地方吃饭去。要不然，在下星期日汽车出游以前，她肯定拿到了这件外套。这次汽车出游，与其说是克莱德，还不如说是赫格伦提议的，不过说不定会延期。 她提议不妨到某一家舞厅去。两人起舞后，她猥亵地紧贴着他，后来还暗示出一种心意，竟然让克莱德也感到有点儿颤栗和惊惶。 他后来回到了家里，有如梦幻似的回味着这一天的情景，满意地认为，第一期付款不会有什么困难，哪怕是要五十块美元也行。因为，如今就在霍丹斯这许诺的刺激之下，他打算向拉特勒或是赫格伦移借二十五块美元，等到外套款项付清以后再归还他们。 可是，啊，多么美的霍丹斯! 她那魅力，她那令人倾倒。难以抑制的无限喜悦啊。只要想一想，她终于在顷刻之间就要属于他啦。这分明是恍如置身于梦幻之中……不可置信的事果真变成了事实。

Part 1 Chapter 16 True to her promise, the following day Hortense returned to Mr. Rubenstein, and with all the cunning of hernature placed before him, with many reservations, the nature of the dilemma which confronted her. Could she, byany chance, have the coat for one hundred and fifteen dollars on an easy payment plan? Mr. Rubenstein's headforthwith began to wag a solemn negative. This was not an easy payment store. If he wanted to do business thatway he could charge two hundred for the coat and easily get it. 　　"But I could pay as much as fifty dollars when I took the coat," argued Hortense. 　　"Very good. But who is to guarantee that I get the other sixty-five, and when?""Next week twenty-five, and the week after that twenty five and the next week after that fifteen.""Of course. But supposin' the next day after you take the coat an automobile runs you down and kills you. Thenwhat? How do I get my money?"Now that was a poser. And there was really no way that she could prove that any one would pay for the coat. 　　And before that there would have to be all the bother of making out a contract, and getting some reallyresponsible person--a banker, say--to endorse it. No, no, this was not an easy payment house. This was a cashhouse. That was why the coat was offered to her at one hundred and fifteen, but not a dollar less. Not a dollar. 　　Mr. Rubenstein sighed and talked on. And finally Hortense asked him if she could give him seventy-five dollarscash in hand, the other forty to be paid in one week's time. Would he let her have the coat then--to take homewith her? 　　"But a week--a week--what is a week then?" argued Mr. Rubenstein. "If you can bring me seventy-five nextweek or to-morrow, and forty more in another week or ten days, why not wait a week and bring the wholehundred and fifteen? Then the coat is yours and no bother. Leave the coat. Come back to-morrow and pay metwenty-five or thirty dollars on account and I take the coat out of the window and lock it up for you. No one caneven see it then. In another week bring me the balance or in two weeks. Then it is yours." Mr. Rubensteinexplained the process as though it were a difficult matter to grasp. 　　But the argument once made was sound enough. It really left Hortense little to argue about. At the same time itreduced her spirit not a little. To think of not being able to take it now. And yet, once out of the place, her vigorrevived. For, after all, the time fixed would soon pass and if Clyde performed his part of the agreement promptly,the coat would be hers. The important thing now was to make him give her twenty-five or thirty dollarswherewith to bind this wonderful agreement. Only now, because of the fact that she felt that she needed a newhat to go with the coat, she decided to say that it cost one hundred and twenty-five instead of one hundred andfifteen. 　　And once this conclusion was put before Clyde, he saw it as a very reasonable arrangement--all thingsconsidered--quite a respite from the feeling of strain that had settled upon him after his last conversation withHortense. For, after all, he had not seen how he was to raise more than thirty-five dollars this first week anyhow. 　　The following week would be somewhat easier, for then, as he told himself, he proposed to borrow twenty ortwenty-five from Ratterer if he could, which, joined with the twenty or twenty-five which his tips would bringhim, would be quite sufficient to meet the second payment. The week following he proposed to borrow at leastten or fifteen from Hegglund--maybe more--and if that did not make up the required amount to pawn his watchfor fifteen dollars, the watch he had bought for himself a few months before. It ought to bring that at least; it costfifty. 　　But, he now thought, there was Esta in her wretched room awaiting the most unhappy result of her one romance. 　　How was she to make out, he asked himself, even in the face of the fact that he feared to be included in thefinancial problem which Esta as well as the family presented. His father was not now, and never had been, of anyreal financial service to his mother. And yet, if the problem were on this account to be shifted to him, how wouldhe make out? Why need his father always peddle clocks and rugs and preach on the streets? Why couldn't hismother and father give up the mission idea, anyhow? 　　But, as he knew, the situation was not to be solved without his aid. And the proof of it came toward the end ofthe second week of his arrangement with Hortense, when, with fifty dollars in his pocket, which he was planningto turn over to her on the following Sunday, his mother, looking into his bedroom where he was dressing, said: 　　"I'd like to see you for a minute, Clyde, before you go out." He noted she was very grave as she said this. As amatter of fact, for several days past, he had been sensing that she was undergoing a strain of some kind. At thesame time he had been thinking all this while that with his own resources hypothecated as they were, he could donothing. Or, if he did it meant the loss of Hortense. He dared not. 　　And yet what reasonable excuse could he give his mother for not helping her a little, considering especially theclothes he wore, and the manner in which he had been running here and there, always giving the excuse ofworking, but probably not deceiving her as much as he thought. To be sure, only two months before, he hadobligated himself to pay her ten dollars a week more for five weeks, and had. But that only proved to her verylikely that he had so much extra to give, even though he had tried to make it clear at the time that he waspinching himself to do it. And yet, however much he chose to waver in her favor, he could not, with his desirefor Hortense directly confronting him. 　　He went out into the living-room after a time, and as usual his mother at once led the way to one of the benchesin the mission-- a cheerless, cold room these days. 　　"I didn't think I'd have to speak to you about this, Clyde, but I don't see any other way out of it. I haven't anyonebut you to depend upon now that you're getting to be a man. But you must promise not to tell any of the others-Frankor Julia or your father. I don't want them to know. But Esta's back here in Kansas City and in trouble, and Idon't know quite what to do about her. I have so very little money to do with, and your father's not very much ofa help to me any more."She passed a weary, reflective hand across her forehead and Clyde knew what was coming. His first thought wasto pretend that he did not know that Esta was in the city, since he had been pretending this way for so long. Butnow, suddenly, in the face of his mother's confession, and the need of pretended surprise on his part, if he were tokeep up the fiction, he said, "Yes, I know.""You know?" queried his mother, surprised. 　　"Yes, I know," Clyde repeated. "I saw you going in that house in Beaudry Street one morning as I was goingalong there," he announced calmly enough now. "And I saw Esta looking out of the window afterwards, too. So Iwent in after you left.""How long ago was that?" she asked, more to gain time than anything else. 　　"Oh, about five or six weeks ago, I think. I been around to see her a coupla times since then, only Esta didn'twant me to say anything about that either.""Tst! Tst! Tst!" clicked Mrs. Griffiths, with her tongue. "Then you know what the trouble is.""Yes," replied Clyde. 　　"Well, what is to be will be," she said resignedly. "You haven't mentioned it to Frank or Julia, have you?""No," replied Clyde, thoughtfully, thinking of what a failure his mother had made of her attempt to be secretive. 　　She was no one to deceive any one, or his father, either. He thought himself far, far shrewder. 　　"Well, you mustn't," cautioned his mother solemnly. "It isn't best for them to know, I think. It's bad enough as itis this way," she added with a kind of wry twist to her mouth, the while Clyde thought of himself and Hortense. 　　"And to think," she added, after a moment, her eyes filling with a sad, all-enveloping gray mist, "she should havebrought all this on herself and on us. And when we have so little to do with, as it is. And after all the instructionshe has had--the training. 'The way of the transgressor--'"She shook her head and put her two large hands together and gripped them firmly, while Clyde stared, thinkingof the situation and all that it might mean to him. 　　She sat there, quite reduced and bewildered by her own peculiar part in all this. She had been as deceiving as anyone, really. And here was Clyde, now, fully informed as to her falsehoods and strategy, and herself lookingfoolish and untrue. But had she not been trying to save him from all this--him and the others? And he was oldenough to understand that now. Yet she now proceeded to explain why, and to say how dreadful she felt it all tobe. At the same time, as she also explained, now she was compelled to come to him for aid in connection with it. 　　"Esta's about to be very sick," she went on suddenly and stiffly, not being able, or at least willing, apparently, tolook at Clyde as she said it, and yet determined to be as frank as possible. "She'll need a doctor very shortly andsome one to be with her all the time when I'm not there. I must get money somewhere--at least fifty dollars. Youcouldn't get me that much in some way, from some of your young men friends, could you, just a loan for a fewweeks? You could pay it back, you know, soon, if you would. You wouldn't need to pay me anything for yourroom until you had."She looked at Clyde so tensely, so urgently, that he felt quite shaken by the force of the cogency of the request. 　　And before he could add anything to the nervous gloom which shadowed her face, she added: "That other moneywas for her, you know, to bring her back here after her--her"--she hesitated over the appropriate word but finallyadded--"husband left her there in Pittsburgh. I suppose she told you that.""Yes, she did," replied Clyde, heavily and sadly. For after all, Esta's condition was plainly critical, which wassomething that he had not stopped to meditate on before. 　　"Gee, Ma," he exclaimed, the thought of the fifty dollars in his pocket and its intended destination troubling himconsiderably--the very sum his mother was seeking. "I don't know whether I can do that or not. I don't know anyof the boys down there well enough for that. And they don't make any more than I do, either. I might borrow alittle something, but it won't look very good." He choked and swallowed a little, for lying to his mother in thisway was not easy. In fact, he had never had occasion to lie in connection with anything so trying--and sodespicably. For here was fifty dollars in his pocket at the moment, with Hortense on the one hand and his motherand sister on the other, and the money would solve his mother's problem as fully as it would Hortense's, andmore respectably. How terrible it was not to help her. How could he refuse her, really? Nervously he licked hislips and passed a hand over his brow, for a nervous moisture had broken out upon his face. He felt strained andmean and incompetent under the circumstances. 　　"And you haven't any money of your own right now that you could let me have, have you?" his mother halfpleaded. For there were a number of things in connection with Esta's condition which required immediate cashand she had so little. 　　"No, I haven't, Ma," he said, looking at his mother shamefacedly, for a moment, then away, and if it had not beenthat she herself was so distrait, she might have seen the falsehood on his face. As it was, he suffered a pang ofcommingled self-commiseration and self-contempt, based on the distress he felt for his mother. He could notbring himself to think of losing Hortense. He must have her. And yet his mother looked so lone and soresourceless. It was shameful. He was low, really mean. Might he not, later, be punished for a thing like this? 　　He tried to think of some other way--some way of getting a little money over and above the fifty that might help. 　　If only he had a little more time--a few weeks longer. If only Hortense had not brought up this coat idea justnow. 　　"I'll tell you what I might do," he went on, quite foolishly and dully the while his mother gave vent to a helpless"Tst! Tst! Tst!" "Will five dollars do you any good?""Well, it will be something, anyhow," she replied. "I can use it.""Well, I can let you have that much," he said, thinking to replace it out of his next week's tips and trust to betterluck throughout the week. "And I'll see what I can do next week. I might let you have ten then. I can't say forsure. I had to borrow some of that other money I gave you, and I haven't got through paying for that yet, and if Icome around trying to get more, they'll think--well, you know how it is."His mother sighed, thinking of the misery of having to fall back on her one son thus far. And just when he wastrying to get a start, too. What would he think of all this in after years? What would he think of her--of Esta--the family? For, for all his ambition and courage and desire to be out and doing, Clyde always struck her as one whowas not any too powerful physically or rock-ribbed morally or mentally. So far as his nerves and emotions wereconcerned, at times he seemed to take after his father more than he did after her. And for the most part it was soeasy to excite him--to cause him to show tenseness and strain--as though he were not so very well fitted foreither. And it was she, because of Esta and her husband and their joint and unfortunate lives, that was and hadbeen heaping the greater part of this strain on him. 　　"Well, if you can't, you can't," she said. "I must try and think of some other way." But she saw no clear way atthe moment.        霍丹斯说话是算数的，转天真的找鲁宾斯坦先生去了。她施出了她与生俱有的全副佻巧本领，闪烁其词地向他摊开了如今她的难处。能不能网开一面，按照定价一百十五块美元，以分期付款的优厚办法，就让她把外套拿走呢? 鲁宾斯坦听了马上摇头，一本正经地说，这里可不是分期付款的商店。他要是做这样的生意，尽管可以把外套标价两百块美元，立刻就会有人把它买去的。 "不过，要是先付五十块美元，我就得马上拿走这件外套，"霍丹斯抢白说。 "敢情好。只不过尚欠六十五块美元，由谁来担保呢? 多咱给呢? ""下星期给二十五块美元，再下星期给二十五块美元，下下星期再给十五块美元，不就全清了。""当然罗。不过，假定说你拿走这件外套以后，万一转天汽车把你撞倒了，你一下子给撞死了。那又怎么办? 我的钱上哪儿去要呢? "唉，这可是个棘手的问题。说真的，她也没有办法证明由谁替她的外套付钱。而且，事前还得办一大套麻烦的事儿，先订一个合同，再由一个真正殷实可靠的人……比方说，一个银行家……来担保。不，不，鲁宾斯坦店里是不办分期付款的。这里一概现金买卖。所以嘛，外套卖给她只要一百十五块美元，不折不扣的，一块钱也不能少。少一块也不行。 鲁宾斯坦先生舒了一口气，又继续说下去。后来，霍丹斯问他能不能她先付给他现款七十五块美元，余下四十块美元一周内付清。这样，他就可以把外套交给她……让她一块儿带回家吧? "不过嘛，一星期……一星期……等一个星期，又算得了什么呢? "鲁宾斯坦先生大力撺掇她说。"要是你下星期或是明天能付给我七十五块美元，余下四十块美元在一星期内，或是十天内全部付清，那又干吗不再等一星期，把整笔一百十五块美元一起带来呢? 到那时，外套就是您的了，什么麻烦也都没有。外套就给您留在这儿。明天，您再来给我二十五块，或则三十块美元作为定洋，我就把外套从橱窗里取出来，干脆给您锁好，什么人都看不见这件外套了。下一个星期或是下下个星期以内，把余欠带来。那外套就归您了，"鲁宾斯坦先生把这个复杂的程序解释了一遍，好象这是挺难懂似的。 不过，他刚才所讲的，的确理由很充足。霍丹斯实在没有什么好反驳的了。 这时就象给她的兴头上泼了一大瓢凉水。只要想一想，外套硬是不能马上拿走。 不过，她一走出时装店，却又神采奕奕起来了。因为，规定的期限反正很快就会过去的，要是克莱德很快能信守自己的承诺，外套就是归她的啦。目前最要紧的是: 要他掏出二十五块或是三十块美元来，以便敲定这一项妙不可言的协议。 不过，她觉得还需要一顶新帽子来配这件外套，所以就决定说标价是一百二十五块美元，而不是一百十五块美元。 这个结果告诉克莱德以后，他经过通盘考虑，认为非常合理。自从上次霍丹斯找他谈过以后，他心里一直很紧张，这下子才算松了一大口气。因为，说到底，要在头一个星期内张罗到三十五块美元以上的款项，他实在是一筹莫展。 宽放到下一个星期，多少好办些，因为，他心里暗自琢磨，他打算不妨向拉特勒移借二十块或二十五块美元，加上自己可能挣到的二十块或二十五块美元的小费，也就足以偿清第二期的付款了。到第三个星期，他打算向赫格伦至少借十块或十五块美元……备不住多借一些……要是那样还凑不足，他只好把几个月前买的一块表送进当铺，可得十五块美元。最少决不会低于此数;因为当初这块表就标价五十块美元呢。 不过，他又转念一想，还有爱思达在她那寒伧的房间里，等待着她那仅有的一次恋爱史极端不幸的结局。他又担心自问，既然他很怕卷入爱思达以及全家钱财收支问题中去，那她怎么去对付那些开支呢? 至于赚钱这类事，不说现在他父亲也帮不了母亲忙，而且历来一直都是如此。不过，万一这副不轻的担子落到他身上来，那他该怎么对付呢? 他父亲干吗老是穿街走巷，叫卖钟表。毯子，还要在街头传道呢? 说到底，他父母干吗不能放弃传道这个想法呢? 不过，据他知道，现在家里困境，没有他的帮助是解决不了的。他的这个想法，在他同霍丹斯商定后的第二个周末就得到了证实。那时，他正巧在自己卧室穿衣服，口袋里还有五十块美元，打算下个星期日交给她，哪知道他母亲冲他卧室张望了一下，说: "克莱德，你出门前，我有话要跟你说。"他觉察到她说话时面有忧色。事实上，这几天来，他一直觉得她正碰上了一件确实费劲的事。可他自己却一直在想: 他的钱财如今几乎抵押殆尽，也就无力相助了。要不然，他就得失掉了霍丹斯。这个他当然不干。 不过话又说回来，他又能搬出怎样一些名正言顺的理由来，说不能帮母亲一点小忙呢。尤其是他身上穿的讲究衣着，还有他一个劲儿往外跑的德行，动不动推托说到酒店里忙工作去了，其实也许并不象他所想象的那样能瞒过他母亲。当然罗，仅仅两个月前，他答应过每星期多给母亲十块美元，拢共五个星期，事实上他也说到做到了。不过，这么一来，也许反而使母亲认为: 他有的是富裕的钱，真拿得出来，哪怕当时他竭力向她解释过，这些钱都是他硬挤出来的。不过，即使他多么想帮母亲一点忙，心里仍在犹豫不定，但阻碍他的正是他对霍丹斯那种没法压抑的欲念，因此，他也就做不到了。 不一会儿，他走进了起坐间，母亲照例马上领他坐到传道馆里的一条长条凳上……近来这个屋子总是让人感到那样灰溜溜。冷清清。 "我本想不跟你谈这件事，克莱德，可我再也没有别的办法了。除了你，我再也没有别人好指靠，因为现在你长大成人了。不过，你务必答应我决不告诉别人……不管是弗兰克。朱丽娅，还是你父亲。我不想让他们知道。爱思达已经回到堪萨斯城了，而且处于困境，我简直不知道对她怎么办。我只有那么一点儿钱，你父亲又压根儿帮不了我什么忙。"她那疲乏而又忧心忡忡的手一掠过额角，克莱德就知道紧接着是怎么回事了。他先想假装自己并不知道爱思达在城里，反正他这样假装已经很久了。不过，此刻他母亲既然照实说了出来，他倘要继续佯装不知，那就非得装做大吃一惊不可。因此他说: "是的，我知道。""你知道了吗? "母亲大吃一惊地问道。 "是的，我知道了，"克莱德又说了一遍。"那天早上，我正从博德里街走过，恰好看见您走进那幢房子，"他说话时心情平静极了。"后来，我又看见爱思达探出头来往窗外张望。因此，等您走了以后，我就走了进去。""这事有多少日子了，"她这样问，不外乎多争取一点让自己考虑的时间。 "哦，我想，大约在五六个星期以前。以后，我去看过她两次，不过，爱思达不让我再提那件事了。""Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! "格里菲思太太一个劲儿发出砸嘴声。"那你知道她那倒楣的事吧。""是的，"克莱德回答说。 "哦，这可是在劫难逃啊，"她有点儿听天由命地说。"那你没有跟弗兰克或是朱丽娅说起过吧? ""没有，"克莱德若有所思地回答说，他心里想他母亲竭力想要保守秘密，到头来还是归于失败。不论她也好，还是他父亲也好，压根儿都不会哄骗人的。 他认为自己比双亲可要精明得多。 "哦，你万万不要给他们说呀，"母亲一本正经地关照他。"依我看，最好还是不让他们知道。现在不说也已经够糟了，"她嘴一撇，找补着说;这时，克莱德心里却只想着自己与霍丹斯。 "只要想一想，"不一会儿，她又接下去说，眼里好象弥漫着一片灰蒙蒙的愁雾，"是她使她自己和我们吃这样的苦头。难道说那是我们造的孽吗? 说到底，她还受过教育与培养。' ''''罪人的道路……，"她摇摇头，使劲地搓着自己两只大手;克莱德两眼直瞪着，心里琢磨着目前因境有可能连累他。 她坐在那里，对自己在这件事中所扮演的角色觉得相当泄气。尴尬。说真的，她的骗人伎俩与常人如出一辙。眼前的克莱德对她弄虚作假这一套策略早就一清二楚;她不免显得虚伪和愚蠢。不过，她至今还一直在设法不让他……不让他和家里其他人……卷进去，可不是吗? 现在克莱德长大了，该懂得这一层意思了。现在她就进一步解释说，为什么她要这么办，又说她觉得这一切该有多么可怕。同时，她又解释了，此刻为什么这事她非得向他求助不可。 "爱思达的月子也很近了，"突然间，她生拉硬拽地说道。她说这话时，既不能看，至少似乎是不愿看着克莱德，不过，她还是决意尽可能开门见山地说了。 "她马上就得请一个医生，还要雇一个人，我不在时可以照料她。我这就得上哪儿寻摸钱去……至少五十块美元。你能不能设法弄到这笔钱，向你那些年轻朋友移借，暂借几个星期，行不行? 反正你知道，你很快就能归还的。在你还清以前，你住房的钱就不用给我了。"她两眼直望着克莱德，神色显得那样焦急。紧迫，所以他就觉得浑身上下已被这一请求的令人信服的威力所震撼了。他还来不及说些什么，来加重在她脸上反映出来的内心忧伤，她又找补着说: "上次的钱也是为了她，你知道，就是让她回来，当时她的……她的……"她迟疑了一会儿，想要挑选一个恰当的词儿，不过最后还是接下去说，"丈夫已在匹茨堡把她离弃了。我想那事她已经告诉过你了。""是的，她告诉过我了，"克莱德心情沉重而又忧郁地回答说。当然罗，爱思达的境况显然是严重的，只不过从前他就是不愿好好思考罢了。 "怎么啦，妈，"他大声说道。他一想到口袋里的五十块美元和它预定的用途，心里就非常烦恼……这数目恰好是他母亲急需的数目。"我可不知道我办得到还是办不到。我对酒店里伙计们还不怎么了解，从没开口借过钱。再说，他们挣的钱也并不比我多。也许我能借到一点钱，只不过很不好看。"他说到这儿哽住了，就咽下一口唾沫，因为，向自己母亲撒谎，可也是不易啊。事实上，过去他对这么棘手的事从来没有撒过谎……而且又是如此卑鄙撤谎。此刻他口袋里正有五十块美元，一面是霍丹斯，另一面则是他母亲和姐姐，而这一笔钱就能解决他母亲的问题，就象解决霍丹斯的问题一样绰绰有余，而且更加用在刀刃上。要是不帮助母亲呢，这太可怕了。说真的，他怎能一口拒绝她呢? 他心神不安地舔着嘴唇，一只手捋着额角，因为他由于内心不安，脸上早已汗涔涔了。 在这种情况之下，他觉得自己尴尬，卑鄙，不中用。 "眼下你自个儿能给我一点儿钱，好吗? "他母亲几乎在恳求说。因为爱思达处在那样的情况下，少不了要准备许多东西，急需现钱，可她的钱又是那么少。 "没有，我没有，妈，"他说，满面羞惭地看了一眼母亲，接着眼光马上望着别处;要不是他母亲自己精神恍惚，也许会从他脸上识破他的虚伪来。其实，由于他替母亲难过，这时自己也感到一阵自怜。自卑搀杂在一起的痛苦。丢掉霍丹斯，这是他怎么也不能考虑的。她非得属于他不可。可他母亲却显得那么孤单，那么一无依靠。这太可耻了。他真的太低下，太卑鄙。说不定将来有一天他会为这事受到惩罚吧? 他竭力在想能不能有别的办法……即在五十块美元以外另敛一些钱周济她。要是他时间更充裕一点……宽放他一两个星期，该有多好! 要是霍丹斯不是正好在现在提出要买外套这件事，该又多好! "我照实对你说我这算是尽了力，"他继续说，显得十分可笑，而又灰不溜丢的样子;而这时，他母亲正发出一连串"Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! Ｔｓｔ! "失望的声音。"难道说五块美元能帮您什么大忙呀? ""嘿，反正总有点儿用处呗，"她回答说。"我说毕竟是聊胜于无。""得了，这几块钱反正我可以给你，"他说，心里琢磨这点钱可用下星期的小费补上，但愿这一周内交上好运气。"让我再看看下星期有什么办法。也许下星期我能给你十块美元。可我现在还说不准。上次给你的钱，部分是我万不得已借来的，至今还没有归还人家，要是我这会儿再去借，人家心里会想……得了，你一定明白这是怎么回事。"母亲叹了一口气，心里想她不得不样样都靠自己这个儿子，怪可怜的。而且正当他刚刚见世面的时候。往后他对这一切会有怎么个想法? 对她……对爱思达……对整个家庭，又会有什么想法? 因为，尽管克莱德有他自己的抱负。勇气与渴望，谋求自立，可她觉得他这个人体质不怎么太结实，道德上或心智上也不是完全靠得住。他是那么神经过敏，而又富于感情，有时看来与其说象他母亲，还不如说更象父亲。而且，他动不动就非常激动……使他流露出紧张和痛苦的样子……好象不论哪一种情绪，他都招架不住似的。而且正是她，不论过去或现在，一直把爱思达和她丈夫以及他们共同不幸的生活所造成的痛苦绝大部分都让他来忍受。 "哦，你要是没有办法，那就说没有办法，得了，"她说。"让我再去想想别的法子呗。"不过，眼前反正她看不到还有什么出路。

Part 1 Chapter 17 In connection with the automobile ride suggested and arranged for the following Sunday by Hegglund throughhis chauffeur friend, a change of plan was announced. The car--an expensive Packard, no less--could not be hadfor that day, but must be used by this Thursday or Friday, or not at all. For, as had been previously explained toall, but not with the strictest adherence to the truth, the car belonged to a certain Mr. Kimbark, an elderly andvery wealthy man who at the time was traveling in Asia. Also, what was not true was that this particular youthwas not Mr. Kimbark's chauffeur at all, but rather the rakish, ne'er-do-well son of Sparser, the superintendent ofone of Mr. Kimbark's stock farms. This son being anxious to pose as something more than the son of asuperintendent of a farm, and as an occasional watchman, having access to the cars, had decided to take the veryfinest of them and ride in it. 　　It was Hegglund who proposed that he and his hotel friends be included on some interesting trip. But since thegeneral invitation had been given, word had come that within the next few weeks Mr. Kimbark was likely toreturn. And because of this, Willard Sparser had decided at once that it might be best not to use the car any more. 　　He might be taken unawares, perhaps, by Mr. Kimbark's unexpected arrival. Laying this difficulty beforeHegglund, who was eager for the trip, the latter had scouted the idea. Why not use it once more anyhow? He hadstirred up the interest of all of his friends in this and now hated to disappoint them. The following Friday,between noon and six o'clock, was fixed upon as the day. And since Hortense had changed in her plans she nowdecided to accompany Clyde, who had been invited, of course. 　　But as Hegglund had explained to Ratterer and Higby since it was being used without the owner's consent, theymust meet rather far out--the men in one of the quiet streets near Seventeenth and West Prospect, from whichpoint they could proceed to a meeting place more convenient for the girls, namely, Twentieth and Washington. 　　From thence they would speed via the west Parkway and the Hannibal Bridge north and east to Harlem, NorthKansas City, Minaville and so through Liberty and Moseby to Excelsior Springs. Their chief objective there wasa little inn--the Wigwam--a mile or two this side of Excelsior which was open the year around. It was really acombination of restaurant and dancing parlor and hotel. A Victrola and Wurlitzer player-piano furnished thenecessary music. Such groups as this were not infrequent, and Hegglund as well as Higby, who had been thereon several occasions, described it as dandy. The food was good and the road to it excellent. There was a littleriver just below it where in the summer time at least there was rowing and fishing. In winter some people skatedwhen there was ice. To be sure, at this time--January--the road was heavily packed with snow, but easy to get over, and the scenery fine. There was a little lake, not so far from Excelsior, at this time of year also frozen over,and according to Hegglund, who was always unduly imaginative and high-spirited, they might go there andskate. 　　"Will you listen to who's talkin' about skatin' on a trip like this?" commented Ratterer, rather cynically, for to hisway of thinking this was no occasion for any such side athletics, but for love-making exclusively. 　　"Aw, hell, can't a fellow have a funny idea even widout bein' roasted for it?" retorted the author of the idea. 　　The only one, apart from Sparser, who suffered any qualms in connection with all this was Clyde himself. For tohim, from the first, the fact that the car to be used did not belong to Sparser, but to his employer, was disturbing,almost irritatingly so. He did not like the idea of taking anything that belonged to any one else, even fortemporary use. Something might happen. They might be found out. 　　"Don't you think it's dangerous for us to be going out in this car?" he asked of Ratterer a few days before the tripand when he fully understood the nature of the source of the car. 　　"Oh, I don't know," replied Ratterer, who being accustomed to such ideas and devices as this was not muchdisturbed by them. "I'm not taking the car and you're not, are you? If he wants to take it, that's his lookout, ain'tit? If he wants me to go, I'll go. Why wouldn't I? All I want is to be brought back here on time. That's the onlything that would ever worry me."And Higby, coming up at the moment, had voiced exactly the same sentiments. Yet Clyde remained troubled. Itmight not work out right; he might lose his job through a thing like this. But so fascinated was he by the thoughtof riding in such a fine car with Hortense and with all these other girls and boys that he could not resist thetemptation to go. 　　Immediately after noon on the Friday of this particular week the several participants of the outing were gatheredat the points agreed upon. Hegglund, Ratterer, Higby and Clyde at Eighteenth and West Prospect near therailroad yards. Maida Axelrod, Hegglund's girl, Lucille Nickolas, a friend of Ratterer's, and Tina Kogel, a friendof Higby's, also Laura Sipe, another girl who was brought by Tina Kogel to be introduced to Sparser for theoccasion, at Twentieth and Washington. Only since Hortense had sent word at the last moment to Clyde that shehad to go out to her house for something, and that they were to run out to Forty-ninth and Genesee, where shelived, they did so, but not without grumbling. 　　The day, a late January one, was inclined to be smoky with lowering clouds, especially within the environs ofKansas City. It even threatened snow at times--a most interesting and picturesque prospect to those within. Theyliked it. 　　"Oh, gee, I hope it does," Tina Kogel exclaimed when some one commented on the possibility, and LucilleNickolas added: "Oh, I just love to see it snow at times." Along the West Bluff Road, Washington and SecondStreets, they finally made their way across the Hannibal Bridge to Harlem, and from thence along the windingand hill-sentineled river road to Randolph Heights and Minaville. And beyond that came Moseby and Liberty, toand through which the road bed was better, with interesting glimpses of small homesteads and the bleak snow covered hills of January. 　　Clyde, who for all his years in Kansas City had never ventured much beyond Kansas City, Kansas, on the west orthe primitive and natural woods of Swope Park on the east, nor farther along the Kansas or Missouri Rivers thanArgentine on the one side and Randolph Heights on the other, was quite fascinated by the idea of travel whichappeared to be suggested by all this--distant travel. It was all so different from his ordinary routine. And on thisoccasion Hortense was inclined to be very genial and friendly. She snuggled down beside him on the seat, andwhen he, noting that the others had already drawn their girls to them in affectionate embraces, put his arm abouther and drew her to him, she made no particular protest. Instead she looked up and said: "I'll have to take my hatoff, I guess." The others laughed. There was something about her quick, crisp way which was amusing at times. 　　Besides she had done her hair in a new way which made her look decidedly prettier, and she was anxious to havethe others see it. 　　"Can we dance anywhere out here?" she called to the others, without looking around. 　　"Surest thing you know," said Higby, who by now had persuaded Tina Kogel to take her hat off and was holdingher close. "They got a player-piano and a Victrola out there. If I'd 'a' thought, I'd 'a' brought my cornet. I can playDixie on that."The car was speeding at breakneck pace over a snowy white road and between white fields. In fact, Sparser,considering himself a master of car manipulation as well as the real owner of it for the moment, was attemptingto see how fast he could go on such a road. 　　Dark vignettes of wood went by to right and left. Fields away, sentinel hills rose and fell like waves. A wide-armed scarecrow fluttering in the wind, its tall decayed hat awry, stood near at hand in one place. And from nearit a flock of crows rose and winged direct toward a distant wood lightly penciled against a foreground of snow. 　　In the front seat sat Sparser, guiding the car beside Laura Sipe with the air of one to whom such a magnificentcar was a commonplace thing. He was really more interested in Hortense, yet felt it incumbent on him, for thetime being, anyhow, to show some attention to Laura Sipe. And not to be outdone in gallantry by the others, henow put one arm about Laura Sipe while he guided the car with the other, a feat which troubled Clyde, who wasstill dubious about the wisdom of taking the car at all. They might all be wrecked by such fast driving. Hortensewas only interested by the fact that Sparser had obviously manifested his interest in her; that he had to pay someattention to Laura Sipe whether he wanted to or not. And when she saw him pull her to him and asked hergrandly if she had done much automobiling about Kansas City, she merely smiled to herself. 　　But Ratterer, noting the move, nudged Lucille Nickolas, and she in turn nudged Higby, in order to attract hisattention to the affectional development ahead. 　　"Getting comfortable up front there, Willard?" called Ratterer, genially, in order to make friends with him. 　　"I'll say I am," replied Sparser, gayly and without turning. "How about you, girlie?""Oh, I'm all right," Laura Sipe replied. 　　But Clyde was thinking that of all the girls present none was really so pretty as Hortense--not nearly. She hadcome garbed in a red and black dress with a very dark red poke bonnet to match. And on her left cheek, justbelow her small rouged mouth, she had pasted a minute square of black court plaster in imitation of some picturebeauty she had seen. In fact, before the outing began, she had been determined to outshine all the others present,and distinctly she was now feeling that she was succeeding. And Clyde, for himself, was agreeing with her. 　　"You're the cutest thing here," whispered Clyde, hugging her fondly. 　　"Gee, but you can pour on the molasses, kid, when you want to," she called out loud, and the others laughed. 　　And Clyde flushed slightly. 　　Beyond Minaville about six miles the car came to a bend in a hollow where there was a country store and hereHegglund, Higby and Ratterer got out to fetch candy, cigarettes and ice cream cones and ginger ale. And afterthat came Liberty, and then several miles this side of Excelsior Springs, they sighted the Wigwam which wasnothing more than an old two-story farmhouse snuggled against a rise of ground behind it. There was, however,adjoining it on one side a newer and larger one-story addition consisting of the dining-room, the dance floor, andconcealed by a partition at one end, a bar. An open fire flickered cheerfully here in a large fireplace. Down in ahollow across the road might be seen the Benton River or creek, now frozen solid. 　　"There's your river," called Higby cheerfully as he helped Tina Kogel out of the car, for he was already verymuch warmed by several drinks he had taken en route. They all paused for a moment to admire the stream,winding away among the trees. "I wanted dis bunch to bring dere skates and go down dere," sighed Hegglund,"but dey wouldn't. Well, dat's all right."By then Lucille Nickolas, seeing a flicker of flame reflected in one of the small windows of the inn, called, "Oh,see, they gotta fire."The car was parked, and they all trooped into the inn, and at once Higby briskly went over and started the large,noisy, clattery, tinny Nickelodeon with a nickel. And to rival him, and for a prank, Hegglund ran to the Victrolawhich stood in one corner and put on a record of "The Grizzly Bear," which he found lying there. 　　At the first sounds of this strain, which they all knew, Tina Kogel called: "Oh, let's all dance to that, will you? 　　Can't you stop that other old thing?" she added. 　　"Sure, after it runs down," explained Ratterer, laughingly. "The only way to stop that thing is not to feed it anynickels."But now a waiter coming in, Higby began to inquire what everybody wanted. And in the meantime, to show offher charms, Hortense had taken the center of the floor and was attempting to imitate a grizzly bear walking on itshind legs, which she could do amusingly enough--quite gracefully. And Sparser, seeing her alone in the center ofthe floor was anxious to interest her now, followed her and tried to imitate her motions from behind. Finding himclever at it, and anxious to dance, she finally abandoned the imitation and giving him her arms went one-steppingabout the room most vividly. At once, Clyde, who was by no means as good a dancer, became jealous--painfully so. In his eagerness for her, it seemed unfair to him that he should be deserted by her so early--at the verybeginning of things. But she, becoming interested in Sparser, who seemed more worldly-wise, paid no attentionat all to Clyde for the time being, but went dancing with her new conquest, his rhythmic skill seemingcharmingly to match her own. And then, not to be out of it, the others at once chose partners, Hegglund dancingwith Maida, Ratterer with Lucille and Higby with Tina Kogel. This left Laura Sipe for Clyde, who did not likeher very much. She was not as perfect as she might be--a plump, pudgy-faced girl with inadequate sensual blueeyes--and Clyde, lacking any exceptional skill, they danced nothing but the conventional one-step while theothers were dipping and lurching and spinning. 　　In a kind of sick fury, Clyde noticed that Sparser, who was still with Hortense, was by now holding her close andlooking straight into her eyes. And she was permitting him. It gave him a feeling of lead at the pit of his stomach. 　　Was it possible she was beginning to like this young upstart who had this car? And she had promised to like himfor the present. It brought to him a sense of her fickleness--the probability of her real indifference to him. Hewanted to do something--stop dancing and get her away from Sparser, but there was no use until this particularrecord ran out. 　　And then, just at the end of this, the waiter returned with a tray and put down cocktails, ginger ale andsandwiches upon three small tables which had been joined together. All but Sparser and Hortense quit and cametoward it--a fact which Clyde was quick to note. She was a heartless flirt! She really did not care for him afterall. And after making him think that she did, so recently--and getting him to help her with that coat. She couldgo to the devil now. He would show her. And he waiting for her! Wasn't that the limit? Yet, finally seeing thatthe others were gathering about the tables, which had been placed near the fire, Hortense and Sparser ceaseddancing and approached. Clyde was white and glum. He stood to one side, seemingly indifferent. And LauraSipe, who had already noted his rage and understood the reason now moved away from him to join Tina Kogel,to whom she explained why he was so angry. 　　And then noting his glumness, Hortense came over, executing a phase of the "Grizzly" as she did so. 　　"Gee, wasn't that swell?" she began. "Gee, how I do love to dance to music like that!""Sure, it's swell for you," returned Clyde, burning with envy and disappointment. 　　"Why, what's the trouble?" she asked, in a low and almost injured tone, pretending not to guess, yet knowingquite well why he was angry. "You don't mean to say that you're mad because I danced with him first, do you? 　　Oh, how silly! Why didn't you come over then and dance with me? I couldn't refuse to dance with him when hewas right there, could I?""Oh, no, of course, you couldn't," replied Clyde sarcastically, and in a low, tense tone, for he, no more thanHortense, wanted the others to hear. "But you didn't have to fall all over him and dream in his eyes, either, didyou?" He was fairly blazing. "You needn't say you didn't, because I saw you."At this she glanced at him oddly, realizing not only the sharpness of his mood, but that this was the first time hehad shown so much daring in connection with her. It must be that he was getting to feel too sure of her. She wasshowing him too much attention. At the same time she realized that this was not the time to show him that she did not care for him as much as she would like to have him believe, since she wanted the coat, already agreedupon. 　　"Oh, gee, well, ain't that the limit?" she replied angrily, yet more because she was irritated by the fact that whathe said was true than anything else. "If you aren't the grouch. Well, I can't help it, if you're going to be as jealousas that. I didn't do anything but dance with him just a little. I didn't think you'd be mad." She moved as if to turnaway, but realizing that there was an understanding between them, and that he must be placated if things were togo on, she drew him by his coat lapels out of the range of the hearing of the others, who were already lookingand listening, and began. 　　"Now, see here, you. Don't go acting like this. I didn't mean anything by what I did. Honest, I didn't. Anyhow,everybody dances like that now. And nobody means anything by it. Aren't you goin' to let me be nice to you likeI said, or are you?"And now she looked him coaxingly and winsomely and calculatingly straight in the eye, as though he were theone person among all these present whom she really did like. And deliberately, and of a purpose, she made apursy, sensuous mouth--the kind she could make--and practised a play of the lips that caused them to seem towant to kiss him--a mouth that tempted him to distraction. 　　"All right," he said, looking at her weakly and yieldingly. "I suppose I am a fool, but I saw what you did, allright. You know I'm crazy about you, Hortense--just wild! I can't help it. I wish I could sometimes. I wish Iwouldn't be such a fool." And he looked at her and was sad. And she, realizing her power over him and how easyit was to bring him around, replied: "Oh, you--you don't, either. I'll kiss you after a while, when the others aren'tlooking if you'll be good." At the same time she was conscious of the fact that Sparser's eyes were upon her. Alsothat he was intensely drawn to her and that she liked him more than any one she had recently encountered.        有关汽车出游的事，原是赫格伦通过他的一个当汽车司机的朋友提出来的，约定在下个星期日，可后来又宣布计划改变了。那辆车子……一辆豪华的大帕卡德，不是随便什么一辆车子……约定那天弄不到手，那末，要使用它就只能到本星期四或星期五，或者根本就不用它。这事当初向大家解释过了的，只不过部分符合实情;原来这辆汽车车主是一个名叫金巴克的先生，此人是个上了年纪的大富翁，这时正在亚洲旅游。有一点不符合事实的，就是: 这个年轻人压根儿不是金巴克先生的司机，只不过是金巴克先生某牧场里一个管理人斯帕塞的那个放荡不羁。游手好闲的儿子。这个儿子一心想把自己说成比牧场管理人儿子来头更大。有时他担任牧场的守卫，所以有机会进入汽车间，就决定挑选一辆最漂亮车子，开出去兜兜风。 是赫格伦出的主意，让他和他酒店里一些朋友一块参加这一次有趣的旅行。 不过，邀请刚向大家发出，就传来了一个消息，说: 金巴克先生一两周内可能要回来了。因此，威拉德。斯帕塞立即决定，最好还是不要再用这辆车子。金巴克先生突然回来，也许使他措手不及了。他把这困难告诉了急急乎筹划这次旅行的赫格伦，后者完全否定了他的这个想法。为什么不再使用一次这辆汽车呢? 他早已把他所有朋友对这次出游的兴致鼓了起来，如今当然不愿叫他们扫兴。 于是出游定在下星期五，从午休起一直玩到下午六点。如今霍丹斯既然有自己的盘算，所以就决定陪同(自然也在被邀请之列的)克莱德一块去了。 不过，正如赫格伦向拉特勒和希格比关照过: 既然使用这辆车未经主人同意，所以务必在远一点的地方集合……男的在第十七街与西望处附近一条僻静的街上会合，再从那里走到便于姑娘们集合的地方，亦即第二十街和华盛顿街的交岔路口。从那里起，他们可以开足马力，经过西花园道。汉尼拔桥，往东北方向奔哈莱姆。北堪萨斯城。米纳维尔，然后经过利伯蒂。莫斯比到至善泉。他们的主要目的地，是那里的一家小旅馆……威格沃姆……位于至善泉这边一两英里处，全年开业的;实际上，它既是一家餐厅，同时也是舞厅和旅馆。有一架维克多牌手摇留声机，一架沃利来牌自动钢琴，可供跳舞时伴奏。那里时常见到类似这样的青年旅游团，来过多次的赫格伦和希格比都把它说成呱呱叫的好地方。不但吃得好，去那里的公路也棒极了。附近有一条小河，至少夏天可以划船和钓鱼。到了冬天，小河一封冻，就有人溜冰了。眼下正是一月份，自然，路上铺满了雪，不过车子不算难开，而且四周风景美极了。离至善泉不远，有一个小湖泊，每年一到这个时节，就完全结冰了，但据想象力一向太丰富。脾性暴烈的赫格伦说，他们还不妨可以上那儿溜冰去。 "是谁说的，白白浪费宝贵时间去溜冰? 你们同意这个主意? "拉特勒相当挖苦地指摘说，因为按照他的观点来看，去的目的并不在于体育娱乐，而纯粹是谈情说爱罢了。 "真混蛋，这主意就算是挺可笑的，也犯不着马上挖苦嘛! "出这个主意的人反驳说。 这一拨人里除了斯帕塞以外，只有克莱德一人对这件事表示疑惧不安。因为，他觉得，要使用的这辆汽车并不是斯帕塞的，而是他东家的，首先就令人不安，几乎引起很大反感。他反对随意使用别人的东西，哪怕暂时借用也不行。 说不定会出什么岔子。他们很可能一下子就被揭出来了。 "我们把这辆车子开出城去，难道说你不觉得有危险吗? "出发前一两天，当他闹明白这辆车子的来龙去脉后，就这么问拉特勒。 子和把戏，他早就习已为常了，所以也并不感到什么不安。"反正寻摸这辆车子的人，不是我，也不是你，是吧? 如果说斯帕塞要寻摸这辆车子，那是他的事，是吧? 如果说他要我去，那我就去。我干吗不去呢? 我觉得最最要紧的，就是要准时把我捎回来。我最担心的，就是仅仅这一件事。"这时走过来的希格比，也说出了完全相同的看法。不过，克莱德心里还是忐忑不安。万一出了什么岔子，也许他仅仅因为类似这样的小事，就把自己的差使给丢了。不过话又说回来，一想到自己同霍丹斯和其他少男少女一起乘坐漂亮的汽车出游，他就给迷住了: 他毕竟抵挡不住这样的诱惑。 本星期五正午刚过，参加郊游的人已在约定的几个地点集合了。赫格伦。 拉特勒。希格比和克莱德，在铁路调车场附近第十八街与西望处拐角处集合。 赫格伦的女友梅达。阿克塞尔罗德，拉特勒的朋友露西尔。尼古拉斯，希格比的朋友蒂娜。科格尔，还有蒂娜。科格尔带来。准备介绍给斯帕塞的另一位女郎劳拉。赛普，在第二十街与华盛顿街拐角处集合。只有霍丹斯临时捎话给克莱德，说她要回家去取东西，请他们劳驾把车子开到第四十九街与詹尼西街交岔口她的住地，他们虽然照办了，但也不是一点儿怨言都没有。 时值一月底的一天，烟雾迷漫，云霭低垂，特别是在堪萨斯城的四郊。有时甚至象要下雪了……对久居市廛的这些人来说，这可是最耐人寻味的美景了。 他们都很喜欢欣赏这种雪景。 "哦，我才巴不得下雪呢，"蒂娜。科格尔听到有人说可能下雪的时候大声嚷嚷说。露西尔。尼古拉斯找补着说: "哦，有时候，我可真喜欢看雪景。"他们沿着西布卢夫街。华盛顿街。第二街，经过汉尼拔桥，到哈莱姆，再从那儿顺着迂回曲折。两旁层峦叠嶂的沿河公路，到达伦道夫高地和米纳维尔。再往前去，就经过莫斯比和利伯蒂，沿途路面比较好，还可以瞥见一些小小的农家宅地和一月里白雪皑皑的荒凉山冈，真是有趣极了。 克莱德虽然居住在堪萨斯城已有这么多年，却从来没有到过离堪萨斯城更远的堪萨斯州以西的地方;也没有到过斯沃普公园原始森林以东的地方;沿着堪萨斯河或是密苏里河，一头到阿根廷，另一头到伦道夫高地。因此，这次外出旅游……长途旅行……简直使他为之心醉神迷。它同他平日里刻板的生活该有多么不同啊。而且霍丹斯这一回对他简直情深似海。她坐在他身旁，紧偎着他。 克莱德看到别人都把各自的女友拽到身边，亲昵地拥抱着，他就一手搂住她的腰肢，把她拉到身边，她倒也并没有特别表示什么不以为然的样子。与此相反，她抬起头来，说: "我看我还是把帽子摘下来吧。"大家哈哈笑了起来。她那机灵的活泼劲儿，有时真是惹人喜爱。此外，她头上那个新颖的发型，肯定使她显得更美了，因此，她也急急乎要大伙儿看看。 "我们去那儿有地方跳舞吗? "她大声问别人，却并不向四处张望。 "当然有罗，"希格比说。这时他已说服蒂娜。科格尔把帽子摘了，正紧紧地搂着她。"那儿有一架自动钢琴，一架维克多牌手摇留声机。真可惜，我没想到把自己的短号也捎来。我能吹狄克西(此处指美国南北战争时南部联邦流行的军歌。)。"汽车正以令人头昏目眩的高速在白雪覆盖的公路和白茫茫的田野里飞也似的驶过。斯帕塞自诩为开车的能手，眼下又是这辆车子的真正主人，正在大显身手，要看看自己在这种路面上到底能开多快。 景色如画的黑苍苍的树林子，从车子左右两侧掠过。田野一片又接一片，两旁哨兵似的山峦，有如波浪一般此起彼伏。一个伸出长长手臂的稻草人，歪戴着一顶高高耸起的破帽儿，伫立在附近的道路旁，在风中好象不断鼓动自己翅膀。离稻草人不远处，有一群乌鸦惊飞了起来，径直朝远处雪地里依稀可辨的一片灰蒙蒙的树林子飞去。 斯帕塞坐在前座，劳拉。赛普紧挨着他。他开着车子，装出好象开这样一辆豪华的汽车对他来说一点儿都不觉得有什么了不起的样子。说实话，他对霍丹斯的兴趣更大，只不过至少眼前不得不向劳拉。赛普献上一点儿殷勤。向女人献殷勤，他是决不落人之后的，所以，此刻他就一只手搂住劳拉。赛普，另一只手开车……这一开车技艺的表演，使克莱德深感困惑不安。随便使用别人车子是不是合适，至今他仍表怀疑。车子开得这样快，说不定大伙儿正面临同归于尽的危险吧。霍丹斯一心只注意的，是斯帕塞显然很喜欢她，虽然不管他愿意不愿意，好歹还得向劳拉。赛普献上一点儿殷勤。所以，当他拥抱劳拉，趾高气扬地问她是不是经常在堪萨斯城周围开车时，霍丹斯暗自发笑。 不过，拉特勒觉察到这一点了，他轻轻地推了一推露西尔。尼古拉斯胳臂，露西尔。尼古拉斯又轻轻地推了一推希格比胳臂，要他留神注意前座爱情场面的新发展。 "喂，怎么样，你在前座倒是挺舒服，是吧? "拉特勒为了套近乎，和颜悦色地问斯帕塞。 "我说够舒服的了，"斯帕塞头也不回，乐乐呵呵地说。"你怎么样，小妞儿? ""哦，我也好极了，"劳拉。赛普回答说。 可是，克莱德心里却在想，这儿所有的姑娘，说真的，哪一个都比不上霍丹斯那样美……差得还远呢。她身穿一件红底黑花的衣服，还特意配上一顶深红色朝前撑起的宽边的女帽。她在抹口红的小嘴底下，模仿她所见过的一些银幕上美人儿的样子，给自己左颊上贴了一颗美人痣。事实上，在出游之前，她早就决定，要使所有在场的姑娘们都黯然失色，如今她心里非常清楚，她终于成功了。至于克莱德呢，也跟她的想法完全相同。 "你在这里是最俏的姑娘，"克莱德亲昵地搂住她，低声耳语道。 "嘿，你可真的会给人灌糖蜜啊! 小宝贝! "她大声嚷嚷说，别人也都随着笑了起来。克莱德脸上稍微有点儿涨红。 汽车驶过米纳维尔约莫有六英里光景，来了一个转弯，开到了一片低洼地。 那里有一家乡村小店，赫格伦。希格比和拉特勒就在这儿下了车，买了一些糖果。香烟。蛋卷冰淇淋和姜汁淡色啤酒。随后开过利伯蒂，就在离至善泉几英里处，他们已经可以遥望威格沃姆小旅馆了。它不外乎是一所两层楼的乡村房子，蜷伏在一块高高隆起的土冈上。可是一边接出一长溜平房，样子比较新，开间也比较大，作为餐厅。舞厅，末梢还辟出一部分作酒吧间。偌大的壁炉里，炉火烧得正旺。公路对面低洼地那里，可以望得见本顿河，其实是一条小溪，如今早已严严实实地冰封了。 "那就是你喜欢的那条河啊，"希格比搀扶着蒂娜。科格尔下车的时候，乐乐呵呵地说。他一路上喝过好几回酒，早就兴奋极了。大家都下车歇了一会儿，欣赏那弯弯曲曲。穿过树林子的小溪。"我说我们大伙儿该把溜冰鞋也带上，溜个痛快呗，"赫格伦叹了一口气说，"可他们不听我的话。唉，那就只好算了。"这时，露西尔。尼古拉斯忽然看见旅馆里有一个小窗口映出闪烁不定的火光，就大声喊道: "喂，快看，他们生火来着。"汽车终于停妥了，他们成群结伙进了旅馆。希格比马上兴冲冲奔了过去，扔入一枚五美分镍币，那架巨大的。震耳欲聋的旧式自动点唱机就开始响了起来。赫格伦一来是不甘落后，二来也是为了逗着玩儿，就走到了屋角里另一架维克多牌手摇留声机跟前，随手把旁边放着的一张名叫《灰熊》的唱片放了上去。 一听到那支熟悉的乐曲的调子，蒂娜。科格尔就大声嚷道: "喂，大伙儿跟着跳，好吗? 那个破玩意儿别放了，怎么样? "她又找补着说。 "当然罗，等它自己放完，"拉特勒哈哈大笑着说。"要它停下来，只有一个办法，就是别往里头扔镍币。"这时，有一个侍者进来了，希格比问大家要些什么东西。就在这当儿，霍丹斯为了炫耀自己的魅力，就站到房间中央，竭力模仿灰熊用后腿走路的样子，表演得很有味儿……优美极了。斯帕塞见她一个人在房间中央，急巴巴地想勾起她的注意力，就亦步亦趋跟在她后面，竭力模仿她的动作。霍丹斯见他技艺娴熟，自己也急急乎想跳舞，终于不再模仿狗熊的动作，马上张开两条手臂，和他一块跳一步舞，跳得简直活灵活现透了。这时，怎么也称不上舞星的克莱德，立刻妒火中烧……痛苦极了。他对她是那么热情如炽，而她一开始……欢乐才开始时……就把他撇开一旁，他认为太不公道了。可是，霍丹斯却对看来较有社会经验的斯帕塞很感兴趣了，一时间压根儿没有注意到克莱德，只是一个劲儿同刚刚被她征服的人儿跳呀跳的;他的舞艺技巧，一举手，一投足，看来堪与她相媲美。别人也不甘落后，立刻挑选舞伴，赫格伦同梅达跳，拉特勒同露西尔跳，希格比同蒂娜。科格尔跳。只剩下劳拉。赛普同克莱德配对了，可是克莱德并不很喜欢她。她人长得压根儿不美……身材矮胖，脸儿臃肿，一对富于性感的蓝眼睛总是没精打采似的……克莱德既然舞艺并不高超，当人家正在跳出各种复杂的花样变化的时候，他跟劳拉。赛普只好跳着老一套的一步舞。 眼睁睁地看着那个依然还跟霍丹斯在一块的斯帕塞此刻把她搂得紧紧的，而且直勾勾地瞅着她的眼睛，克莱德简直苦恼得要发狂了。对此，她也完全听任他摆布了。他突然觉得好象一颗熗弹打中了自己的肚子。难道说她跟这个神气活现的开车的小伙子卖弄风骚吗? 她还答应现在就同他克莱德亲热呢。他开始揣度到她这个人反复无常……也许她对他压根儿就冷漠无情。他欲设法使跳舞中断，把她从斯帕塞身旁拽走，不过现在毫无办法可想，只好让这张唱片放完了再说。 这张唱片刚放完，侍者托着一只盘子又回来了，把鸡尾酒。姜汁淡色啤酒和三明治放到临时连成一块的三张小桌子上。大家都停止跳舞，朝这边走了过来，只有斯帕塞和霍丹斯除外……克莱德一下子就看出来了。她真是一个没有心肝的骚货! 她压根儿一点都不爱他。最近她却竭力使他相信她是爱他的，而且还撺掇他给她买了外套。让她见鬼去吧。他要给她一点颜色看看。他在等着她! 这简直叫人忍无可忍了! ? 不过，霍丹斯和斯帕塞到头来看见大家都围在壁炉跟前的小桌子四周，也就停止跳舞，款款走了过来。克莱德脸色煞白，怏怏不乐，站在一边，装出一副满不在乎的样子。劳拉。赛普早已觉察到他在恼火，也知道原因何在，所以就离开他走到蒂娜。科格尔那里，告诉她为什么他会这样动怒。 随后，霍丹斯觉察到他郁郁不乐的神色，就走了过来，依然还在模仿灰熊的步态。 "嘿，这可多开心! "她开口说道。"哦，跟着那种乐曲跳舞，我可多喜欢哪! ""当然罗，你可开心啦，"克莱德回答说，妒忌和失望的烈火却在心中燃烧。 "怎么啦，出了什么事? "她压低声音，几乎生气地问，装出猜不透他干吗要发火，其实，她早就心中有数了。"你不是因为我没有先跟你跳就发火了? 是吧? 嘿，多蠢! 那你干吗自己不过来跟我跳呢? 他正好在旁边，我怎能拒绝跟他跳，可不是吗? ""不，当然罗，你不能拒绝，"克莱德讥刺地回答说，声音低沉。紧张，因为他正如霍丹斯一样，不乐意让别人听见他们谈话。"不过，你也用不着同他紧贴在一起，瞅着他的眼睛，有如陶醉在梦境之中，是不是? "他真的火冒三丈了。"你也不用否认啦，反正一切我都看在眼里。"她听了以后，怪吃惊地瞥了他一眼，不仅因为听了他的生气话而感到万分诧异，而且还因为他这是头一次对她如此大胆放肆。想必是他对她觉得太有把握了。而她自己对他也太过分殷勤了。不过，她也知道，现在还不是时候，不能向他表示她并不怎么爱他，眼下他得到的只是假象。因为那件外套已谈妥了，她很想得到它。 "喂，这不是叫人忍无可忍了吗? "她忿忿地回答说。因为他的话说对了，使她更加恼火。"刚才你真是好大的脾气。唉，要是你的妒忌心象刚才那样厉害，那我可也没办法啦。我只不过跟他跳了一会儿舞罢了。我真没想到你就会大动肝火呢。"她一转身，好象要走开的样子，但忽然想到他们之间有一项默契，还得先抚慰一下他不可，要不然这事就给吹了，所以，她就扯着他的上衣大翻领，走得远一些，不让那些早已在看他们。听他们讲话的人听见。接着，她就这么说: "喂，你先听我说。你可千万别这样。刚才我可一点儿都没有别的意思。说实话，我一丁点儿都没有。反正现在谁跳舞都是这样的，所以说也谈不上谁有什么特别的用意。难道说你不要我跟你好吗? 你记得不记得我跟你说过些什么话? "她故作媚态，脉脉含情地直瞅着他的眼睛，仿佛所有在场的人里头，只有他才是她真心喜欢的。同时，她显然是别有用心的，还故意把她的小嘴令人动心地嘟了起来……这正是她常有的挤眉弄眼的一部分……接着，嘴唇翕动，看起来好象要亲吻他的样子……那一张诱使他心旌摇荡的小嘴啊。 "得了吧，"他软弱无力。俯首贴耳地望着她说。"就算我是个傻瓜，不过，你的一举一动，反正我是看见的。你也知道，我为你都快疯了，霍丹斯……简直疯啦! 我可几乎克制不住自己啊。有时候，我也巴不得自己能克制住，不当傻瓜哩。"他两眼直望着她，露出伤心的样子。而她呢，反正知道自己完全可以左右他，要他回心转意也是易如反掌，就这样回答说: "哦，你啊……你才不傻呢。 要是你乖乖的，过一会儿别人看不见，我就跟你亲嘴呗。"就在这一时刻，她意识到: 斯帕塞两眼正直勾勾地瞅着他。她心中知道: 他被她强烈地吸引，而她自己也觉得，在她最近碰到的所有人中间，她最喜欢的就是他了。