礼节美语 为什么外国人不谈钱 公开谈钱是 faux pas_派派后花园
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礼节美语 为什么外国人不谈钱 公开谈钱是 faux pas
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礼节美语 为什么外国人不谈钱 公开谈钱是 faux pas
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发表于: 2012-08-29
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晚宴结束,Jason跟同事Harold一起往外走。Jason说:
Jason: That was a lovely party, wasn't it?
Harold: Yes, it was. The food was pretty good, too.
J: I was a little puzzled about something, though.
H: What was that?
J: At one point in our conversation, Mr. Jones gave me a really funny look...it was almost like I'd broken some sort of a rule.
H: Oh, yes...well you did ask him how much he paid for his apartment.
J: And? What's wrong with asking someone how much they paid for a piece of property? Back in China everybody talks about buying and selling apartments.
Jason是从中国来的,在晚会上问东道主Mr. Jones公寓是多少钱买的。Mr. Jones gave me a really funny look. Mr. Jones 看他的表情有些奇怪,好象他这样问犯了什么大忌。a funny look意思是说不清楚的奇怪表情。Jason 说,在中国,大家见面就是谈房子,因此他不懂,What's wrong with asking someone how much they paid for a piece of property? 问别人买房子花了多少钱有什么不妥呢?Harold解释说:
H: Yeah, I know....but in many Western societies, talking about money in public is a faux pas.
J: What's a faux pas?
H: It's a French term that means a social blunder. Questions like that are considered a little bit impolite.
J: Really? I had no idea. Back in China, it's not generally a problem to ask about how much something costs.
H: I know you meant no offense. When I was assigned to Guangzhou for 6 months, people frequently ask me how much my monthly salary is.
Harold解释说,在很多西方国家,公开谈钱是 faux pas, faux pas 也就是 social blunder 在社交上忌讳做的事,属于失礼的行为。Jason听了觉得很出乎意料,说自己完全不知情,I had no idea. 因为在中国,询问财物的价钱完全不是问题。Harold说,I know you meant no offense. 我知道你不是故意冒犯 Mr. Jones. Harold说自己派驻广州半年时,就经常有人问他每个月的工资是多少。Jason说:
J: That's funny, because Western society seems so open. People talk about all kinds of private things that we wouldn't bring up in China. Buy money is a no-no, huh?
H: If your Western friend buys something for a really good price, he or she might mention it to you by saying something like, "Take a look at this camera that I got on sale for only $99 dollars." But unless the person is a close friend, we almost never ask how much something costs.
J: So, do you avoid talking about money so that people with less money don't feel bad?
Jason觉得很有意思的是,西方社会如此开放,对很多中国不敢涉猎的私人问题都可以拿到台面上来说,但是 money is a no-no. 钱的问题却是个禁区。no-no 两个no连在一起,中间加个连接线,是一种非正式用法,名词,意思是不可以,不被接受的事情。西方人回避谈钱,是因为怕刺激没钱的人吗?
A: Jason在聚会的时候问东道主房子是多少钱买的,主人给了他a funny look, 一个奇怪的表情。原来,在西方文化中,公开谈钱是faux pas, 社交忌讳,除了特别熟识的好友,money is a no-no,钱的问题是个禁区。
B: Yeah, money is something we always avoid talking about.
A: 这跟中国真不一样! 我一回去,就常常有人问我挣多少钱呢! 真让人没法回答! 为什么西方人不愿意谈钱呢?
B: I think it's in part because personal finances are considered to be a private matter in American culture.
A: 听起来真不错! What are the other topics that you would avoid in your conversation?
B: Let me see....Politics, income, age, family issues, religion....there are a lot!
A: 真麻烦呀……咱们还是接着去听听Harold分析为什么外国人不谈钱吧!
礼节美语 - BE-256 Sensitivity Training - Money II
晚宴结束,Jason跟同事Harold一起往外走。Jason是从中国来的,对西方人交往时回避谈钱的问题感到不解,问这样做是不是为了不去刺激那些没什么钱的人。Harold回答说:
Harold: Yes, I think you hit the nail on the head. Also, I think many Westerners believe that if you're rich, you should be quiet about it. In fact, I believe many wealthy people in the West feel a little bit guilty.
J: Why would they feel guilty?
H: Because so many other people work very hard, but never become successful. When the wealthy turn on TV, they see so much pain and suffering.... but their own lives are so comfortable.
J: Ah....I can understand that. If I were a wealthy person I think I'd feel the same way.
Harold说Jason, you hit the nail on the head. 你说得一点没错。to hit the nail on the head 意思是一下子就说到了点子上,还有两种类似的说法,一种是 you are right on. 另外一种说法是 you are right on the money. 都是同样的意思。Harold说,因为西方很多人不喜欢炫富,有些人还会因为自己太有钱,而其他人生活贫苦而感到内疚。Harold 说:
H: It's interesting that some of the most successful entrepreneurs such as John D. Rockefeller and Bill Gates ended up setting up charity organizations and giving away a large portion of the money they made.
J: So you're saying that Bill Gates, for example, doesn't necessarily think he deserves all the money he made....he knows a part of it was luck, right?
H: Yeah. Bill Gates is a computer genius, but he was there at the right place and the right time.
J: That's a good attitude. It's good to remember that hard work and good luck often go hand-in-hand. Okay, so one more time....what's the etiquette when it comes to talking about money with Westerners?
Harold说,这也就是为什么比尔.盖茨和洛克菲勒这种成功的企业家最后都会 end up setting up charity organizations 成立慈善机构,把钱捐出去。虽说比尔.盖茨是电脑天才,但他的成功在很大程度上也是靠机遇,He was there at the right place and the right time. 他在正确的时间出现在了正确的地方,类似中文里说的天时地利人和。Jason很欣赏这种心态,因为 hard work and good luck often go hand-in-hand. 勤奋和运气二者往往必须兼备才能成功。
H: If the person doesn't volunteer information about how much something costs...don't bring it up. Don't ask about personal savings or salary.
J: Is it OK to comment on or praise someone's possessions? If you have a really nice car, can I say, "Wow...nice car?"
H: Yes, that's fine. It only gets complicated when you start talking about specific prices.
J: I see your point. Topics like that could lead to embarrassment.
H: Exactly. Maybe Mr. Jones' apartment was really expensive, but his company paid for it...or maybe he overpaid and got a bad deal....in either case, it's easier for everyone if we don't discuss it in public.
Harold最后总结说,在西方,除非别人主动告诉你,否则不要问人家赚多少工资,有多少存款,买东西花了多少钱这类问题,可以夸别人的东西好,但不要询问价钱,免得彼此尴尬。
A:Hard work and good luck often go hand-in-hand. 听见没有,要成功,勤奋和运气缺一不可呀!
[ 此帖被昭昭木暮在2012-08-29 09:38重新编辑 ]
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发表于: 2012-08-29
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money is really a very sensitive problem.
[ 此帖被wjnynjm在2012-08-29 14:15重新编辑 ]
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