希希指出的问题我就不重复了~
有一些细节方面的问题和搭配的建议~
===================
第一篇:
1. I can develop my dream easily.
我觉得dream其实可以加复数,梦想可能不止一个。另外,感觉develop和dream的搭配不是特别好,develop和skills之类的会比较搭。dream的话,可以用cherish(意思和你原来有些出入)
2. I also can arrange times.
我觉得这个意义的time应该是不可数的,arrange my time可能就可以了
3. It is very good for my mental and body.
可以和希希说的那样把mental改为mind,如果要保留mental,可以说mental and physical well-being。(就是稍微有点文绉绉的)
4. It is without doubt that you are standing the important crossroads.
建议改为an important crossroad,你不太可能同时站在很多个十字路口。
5. So you have the positive attitude to face the study life.
我觉得you后面少一个应该吧,you should have,如果你是站在给过去的自己提建议的角度写
6. ...you will have significant impart
我感觉你应该是想用impact,这样的话,要么加复数,要么significant前面加a,后面的介词也应该用on
7.I developed a habit for using time list to waste time.
和希希一样,我觉得你应该是说避免浪费时间,time list这种说法我没见到过,可以用schedule, timetable之类的来表示
8. 之前出现了on the one hand,这里用On the other hand 比较好。
9. You should change the bad habits.
改变坏习惯可以get out of,change 一般会放在habit后面,尤其常用在已经改变之后的情况下。
10.People are noticing the same things that good habits are a good start towards a better future.
我觉得noticing 后面可以用this phenomenon(如果你觉得这是一个普遍现象的话),另外,后面半句配合有点问题,一会儿单数一会儿复数不太好,可以改为 having good habits is a good start...
第二篇:
1. in Jing’s a District, Shanghai also claimed 53 lives.
你如果说上海静安区的话,应该是Jing'an District
2. While a fire happens, we really need to stay clam. It is without doubt that we have a hope to survive.
fire一般不和happen搭配,通常是break out
hope一般不可数,我觉得此处chance相对合适一点。
3. ...wet a clothes and cover it over your mouth...
因为之前用了we,这里最好保持人称一致,用our mouths and noses
4. ...need to learn more knowledge about safe problems,
knowledge可以省略
=================
PS:其实你写的挺不错的了~o(∩_∩)o
[ 此帖被岚君。在2012-02-22 05:57重新编辑 ]